Before Sunrise (61 page)

Once dinner ended, Kennedy and Sally began
to clean, and the rest of the family drifted away. Gail volunteered
to give Mackenzie a bath and put her to bed. Eric and Harper headed
for the den, but soon slipped out the front door. Liam hoped it was
to have the talk that would save them both a lot of grief.

That left Liam behind. The urge to leave
overcame him but he suppressed it. He wasn’t going anywhere until
he and Kennedy finished their talk. So he found himself alone in
the living room next to the Christmas tree. He brooded over their
argument, particularly over the things his beloved didn’t say. The
looming threat that scared the hell out of him could become a
sobering reality. Each time he stumbled, he feared she doubted
their future. Gone was the spark when he looked into her eyes this
evening. What he saw there was a dull sadness that eroded all the
beautiful things they’d shared with each other since he returned.
How did he manage to royally fuck everything up in one night? He
was going to lose her if he didn’t fix the thing in him he didn’t
understand. He felt it.

“
Can I join you?” Andrew
asked.

Liam glanced up. “Sure.”

Andrew lowered his tall frame into the sofa
chair across from him. He had his pipe in his hand. He looked
prepared to sit whether the invitation was extended or not. Other
than Andrew, Liam didn’t know a man, black or white, who smoked
from a pipe. He watched his father in-law pack the tiny briarwood
chimney with tobacco from a small leather pouch he kept in his
front shirt pocket. Then he lit the stack. The pungent smoke blew
from his wide nostrils and filled the air. Liam relaxed, or
pretended to as they both settled into a comfortable silence.

“
So how are you?” Andrew
eventually asked.

“
Good. I mean I’m okay,” he
said, wiping his sweaty palms down the tops of his thighs. “And
you?”

Andrew smiled. “Best Christmas ever.”

The response made Liam grimace. He was just
thinking the exact opposite. He forced what he hoped looked like a
smile to his face. “I have to say, I really did miss you,
Andrew.”

Andrew gave a curt nod. “Same here. Damn
near gave me a heat attack when I saw it on the news. Still can’t
believe you’re sitting in this room. To see you and Kennedy
together makes me so happy.”

Liam sighed. “Me too.”

He glanced toward the kitchen area. He
didn’t see Kennedy, but he heard her, slamming pots and cleaning.
Sally came out with two beers. She offered one to Andrew who
declined, saying something about his blood pressure, which the pipe
certainly couldn’t be helping. Liam’s mouth watered at the sight of
the frosty green bottle. He could go for a beer to smooth out his
anxiety. He declined. It was best he ease back on the booze. His
lady had taken notice of his nasty habit and thus alcohol was
marked off his list.

“
How’s Kay?” he asked Sally.
His mother just shrugged and turned away.

Had he passed the test? Had Kennedy sent out
a beer to see if he’d drink it? Liam groaned inwardly. He wished he
could throw his lady over his shoulder and take her to his place.
Lock the doors and let her yell and scream at him until she was in
his arms again telling him how wonderful he was. Selfish maybe, but
he could go for it right now. He needed to feel her.

“
Guess she’s a little
pissed, huh?” Andrew asked.

“
I ruined Christmas Eve. She
has a right to be angry.”

Andrew removed his pipe from his dark, thin
lips. He exhaled two streams of smoke from his nostrils. “She’s
strong.”

Liam nodded. “I know. I love her so much. I
just…I want…I want her to be okay.”

“
You don’t think she
is?”

Liam tried to decide if he could speak from
his heart. With Andrew, he knew he could. “She started a new life
without me. She could again if she wanted to. Guess I always feared
she’d wake one day and not need me—and she did.”

Andrew nodded. “You two married young.”

“
She grew up in our
marriage,” Liam said, averting his gaze from the hard stare Andrew
gave him. Another dose of guilt made his palms sweat even more. He
could feel the moist heat of perspiration gathering on his
brow.

“
She grew up outside of your
marriage too,” Andrew stated, without a hint of mockery.

“
I guess that makes me a
real asshole. Wanting to come home and find her the same as she was
when I left.”

Andrew shook his head. “No. It makes you
human.”

“
Why do you like me,
Andrew?” Liam asked. “I took her from you. I know Gail can’t
forgive me. I just never understood why you could. In fact, I never
understood why you didn’t call the police on me when you arrived in
Texas.”

Andrew stuck his pipe in his mouth and sat
there for a moment, staring. For several tense minutes Liam
wondered if his father-in-law had heard the question. Then Andrew
withdrew his pipe and spoke. “I didn’t like you, Liam. At first.
What father would? She was my princess. I never even considered
she’d be anything but my baby girl. I thought you saw her naïveté
and exploited it. But I changed my mind about that.”

“
When?”

“
When what?” Andrew
asked.

“
When did you change your
mind?” Liam pressed, as if he didn’t believe the story.

“
The day I came to the diner
and you sat across from me as a man.”

“
You did?” Liam frowned. He
always believed the threats he and Kennedy had made after their
talk in the diner were the turning point.

“
You told me about the
SEALs, remember? The program. How tough it was, and how the
benefits would protect Kennedy. You were willing to sign your life
over to your country to protect her, to love her. That’s why I made
sure things worked out.”

“
You what?” Liam
gasped.

Andrew gave him a knowing smile. “Son, how
do you think you got accepted into George Mason?”

Liam blinked at him, shocked. He'd taken the
entrance exams, sent for his transcripts. He thought they'd taken
pity on him and let him in. He never guessed Andrew’s involvement.
Even now he wasn’t sure how his father in-law managed it. He’d gone
to Yale. But he was a good man, and a powerful man, so it seemed
plausible.

“
Well, I’ll be damned,” Liam
sighed. “I’ll be damned.”

Andrew continued. “I had hoped when you went
to BUD/s, she’d come home and finish school. She went off to
William and Mary, and that made me even prouder.”

“
She’s smart,” Liam
said.

“
Yes, she is. I’m her
father, I wanted her to be my little girl, but I knew those days
had gone. Kennedy is like me. She thinks, lives, and breathes with
her heart. And you were in her heart. You called me when you were
in trouble, then stood your ground. As incredible as it sounds, I
respected you for that. It eased some of my fears.”

Liam shook his head. “Not sure I could do
the same if some punk kid tried to take Mackenzie.”

Andrew smirked. “Karma.”

Liam tensed, but managed to smile.

They settled again into silence.

“
I remember the day her
world fell apart,” Andrew began.

“
Kay?” Liam
asked.

“
Kennedy.”

Liam swallowed. His throat was so painfully
dry it made his voice raspy. “When?”

Andrew just stared at him for a moment. Liam
knew when. The day their lives changed. When he lost her and she
lost him. Andrew nodded, seeing in his eyes that they were on the
same page. “Kennedy said the Navy told her you were killed in
action. She called me screaming in the phone. Told me that your
unit had abandoned you, or so she believed. She begged me to help.
As if I could do anything. They couldn’t even tell her if they
would recover your body. Apparently she got the news before Eric
and the others could warn her. I’ve never seen her so
devastated.”

The truth about his wife’s pain was an
uncomfortable lesson. He closed his eyes and conjured images of a
pregnant Kennedy alone, sick with grief. It made that cold feeling
of rage rise under the surface of his battle-scarred heart. He
ground his molars in resistance. Who could he blame? Sarkhir? The
Navy? Himself?

“
There I was sitting in my
office, between meetings, when my daughter’s world exploded. She
needed me. It was the first time since you two were married that
she did. I’ve never felt so helpless.” Andrew cleared his throat.
“I’ll tell you this. She never gave up on you, Liam. When she tells
you that its not just words, it’s the truth. We all wrote you off
as a dead hero, and she refused to accept it.”

“
I’ve caused her so much
grief.”

“
No son, you’ve given her
the happiness she deserved, and you kept your promise to her. To
me. I told you I wanted Kennedy to finish school, attend college.
No babies until after she had. You and she honored my wishes. She
didn’t get pregnant until after she graduated. Son, your word has
been golden from the day the two of you married. You said you’d
never abandon her, never fail her, give your life to protect her.
You did all of that, Liam. After everything you’ve been through you
came back to her. I know you survived a lot, just as she held on
for you.”

Liam met Andrew’s stare.

Andrew nodded. “You made more of a sacrifice
than any man I know. I’m proud that you are my son-in-law. Hell,
I’m proud to know you period. Welcome back home, son.”

“
Thank you,” Liam managed to
say.

Andrew rose. “Take her somewhere tonight and
talk it out. She’ll listen if you will. Okay? Good. It’s time for
the old man to pack it in. I think I will go to bed now.”

Liam reached for his cane. “Thanks for the
talk.”

To Liam’s surprise Andrew approached and
pulled him into a tight hug, a lasting hug that forced Liam to lift
his arms to hug him back.

“
We got you back, now stay
with us. Don’t give up, Liam. You’re home.”

“
Thank you, sir,” he
said.

Andrew released him. Sally observed them,
drawing their attention. She had her purse. “Ready to go when you
are,” she headed for the door.

Liam nodded to his mother. It was indeed
late. He should take her back to his place so she could get some
rest. Liam sucked down a deep breath. He stared at the tree a
moment longer, then shook his head. He turned to leave and found
Kennedy staring at him.

“
I’m not coming with you
tonight.”

The words were like a bullet to his chest.
“I understand.”

“
You’ll be here in the
morning?”

“
I will.”

“
She wakes at six. She’ll
expect you to be here.”

“
I’ll be here, Kay. I
promise.”

She looked him over. He lowered his gaze to
his beer-and-blood-stained shirt. He knew his face must have been
ghastly. He couldn’t hide his mistakes from her, so he just waited
for her to speak.

“
Good night.” She turned and
walked back toward the kitchen.

“
Kay?”

She stopped.

“
I love you, babe,” he
said.

She nodded, and went back into the
kitchen.

***

Eric looked up when Sally walked out the
front door. She went around to the passenger side of Liam’s car. A
few minutes later Liam stepped out. Eric had been sitting outside
in Harper’s car for nearly an hour, debating, arguing, agreeing,
and listening to her. The girl was a master negotiator. She could
talk bin Laden out of the Afghan mountains if she wanted to. They
reached the point where words weren’t enough. They remained trapped
in a disagreeable silence and watched the house. Liam moved a
little sluggishly with his head low, his leg stiffening his walk.
He approached the car, got in, then backed out of the drive.

“
You think he and Kennedy
will be okay?” Eric asked. Things had to be bad if his boy was
leaving alone. He felt like shit for taking him to a bar on
Christmas Eve. But he knew his friend. He had to let go of some of
that pent-up aggression. It was the only cure he could think
of.

“
They’ll find their way.,”
Harper sighed.

“
We cool? We understand each
other?”

“
I get it, Eric. You like
the sex, but don’t want the girl.”

“
Fuck, Harper. You know
that’s not what I’m saying.”

“
I said I get it. Doesn’t
mean I have to like it.”

Eric reached over and touched her hand. She
turned it over so she could hold his. He brought it to his lips and
kissed her knuckles softly. “You’re pretty damn special to me, kid.
Thank you, Harper.”

Her eyes were weepy. Tears shimmered from
the tips of her long lashes. “For?”

“
For teaching me a few
things about myself. You made a man who is usually certain of
everything, uncertain of everything. Do you understand?”

“
No.”

“
Trying to do the right
thing here, Harper. Cut me some slack.”

“
Eric…we….” She paused, took
a deep breath, and then continued. “If we tried to get to know each
other, date, just try—”

“
I’m not your guy, Harper.
Okay?”

She slowly withdrew her hand. “Fine. I get
it.”

He opened the door and eased
out, taking his helmet with him. Eric’s heart was packed tight with
misery so he forced his legs to move. He was glad he had a helmet;
it provided the distraction he needed to keep her from seeing the
conflict on his face. He put it on and flipped up the visor so he
could see for his night ride. Climbing on his bike, he heard her
car start and slowly drive away. Eric cursed under his
breath.
Fuck it all to
hell
.
I shoulda
just gone to damn Jakarta
.