Becoming Alpha (27 page)

I’d heard this before—Caucasians versus African Americans, women versus men—same bullshit arguments. Anything but equality was just a load of crap. It made one half-white, half-Mexican, part-werewolf, part-
bruja
woman want to scream. I didn’t fit into any nice little box in Los Angeles, and I sure didn’t fit into any of Mr. Hoel’s boxes now that I added a hefty dose of werewolf into the mix. I had a good feeling that I was a “lesser citizen” in his eyes. Mustering up
the ability to give a shit about that was exceedingly hard. This was some Hilter youth bullshit that Mr. Hoel was trying to pull, and I sincerely hoped I wasn’t the only one seeing through his line of crap.

The third hour was brutal. Halfway though I was jonesing to hit something. Or maybe just a specific someone. Too many of my classmates were nodding or clapping to his conclusions. Didn’t they see how wrong this was?

When the time came for questions, I made sure mine was the first hand up.

I stood from my chair when he nodded at me. “I get that going to school here means that I have to listen to you wax poetically about how much better werewolves are than humans, but don’t you think that you’re being a little racist? Or maybe more appropriately species-ist? And what good would it do to really show up the humans? You want to start a species war in a world that is already ravaged by injustice. You talk about honor among wolves, but I don’t see any honor in what you’re implying.”

I expected the open mouths and gasps from my classmates, but what I didn’t expect was the clapping and cheering from the back of the room. I pulled out the sides of my invisible skirt and curtseyed before sitting down.

“I wouldn’t expect you to understand,” Mr. Hoel said. His words were clipped. “A former human would have little hope of grasping at the complexities of what we covered today and will cover in any future lectures.”

I cleared my throat. “It’s a good thing that being new isn’t the same thing as being ignorant. I’m grasping your complexities quite well, I just happen to vehemently disagree with them. And I have to say your vitriol on the human condition really gets under my skin.”

“I don’t understand—”

“What? Were my words too big for you? Which ones, and I’ll try to explain.”

Meredith elbowed me. “Oh my God! Stop,” she mumbled.

Mr. Hoel strode down the aisle toward me, but Mr. Dawson stepped between us. “Class dismissed. Everyone clear out.” Mr. Dawson’s order echoed in the silent gym. I wanted to stay and argue with the ignoramus but Adrian grabbed one arm and Meredith the other. They dragged me out of the gym.

“Do you have a death wish?” Meredith whispered. “You already know the Hoels have it out for you. Why’d you do that?”

I shrugged out of their grasp and continued walking to our dorm. “No one was contradicting him. I couldn’t just sit there and let him think that we all agreed with that bullshit.”

“Well, it was dumb,” Adrian said. “He’s a powerful enemy for anyone to have, but especially so for a recently bitten girl.”

“Standing up against prejudice is never ever dumb.”

He sighed. “That’s not what I meant.”

“Sure.” I shrugged. “And look, it’s not like he wasn’t already my enemy. The only thing that changed is that everyone knows it. That could save my butt.”

“I’m not sure if you’re suicidal or a genius,” Meredith said.

I grinned. “Go with genius. It’s way more accurate.” I held my fist out to Adrian and he bumped it.

“You’re way more badass than me,” he said.

“Thanks. I guess I’m gonna change and whatnot. Dinner in a bit?” They nodded.

I went up the stairs to my room. It wasn’t until I got to my room that I let out the breath I’d been holding. Maybe going off on Mr. Hoel wasn’t the best idea I’d ever had, but unless I figured out time travel, there was no changing it. And even if there was, I didn’t think I wanted to.

One girl against three ass-Hoels. Those odds weren’t so bad, were they?

I woke up on Saturday totally ready for the weekend. The sirens had gone off all night again, and I couldn’t be the only one a little on edge. My only hope was that I’d have a day blissfully free of people gawking at me or blowing my mind with crazy werewolf history or the “physics” behind magic.

A little R and R would go a long way to soothe my mental state.

I listened for people moving about the dorm, but the sweet sound of silence greeted me. The clock said it was eleven. Thank God for sleeping in. The only thing I needed to know was what to do with my day.

I peeked into Meredith’s room, but she wasn’t there. I hoped she hadn’t gone somewhere too fun without me. What did people do on the weekend here anyway?

I threw on some clothes and grabbed a pair of cotton jersey gloves before heading down to the cafeteria. Adrian and Chris sat at the pristine replacement of our usual table. A few guys in all black were scattered around the room, but other than that it was nearly empty, my lucky day.

Chris reclined with his feet on the table. “How’s it going?”

“Okay.” I ate a bite of my omelet. At least the food was good. It would seriously suck if I had to eat the typical nasty school food by the truckload. “What are you guys up to?”

“Just hanging out,” Adrian said. “Thinking about catching a movie.”

I waited for a “want to come” but got an uncomfortable silence instead. Adrian squirmed as I stared him down. Why were they being distant all of a sudden?

Chris grabbed my hand. “We’d take you if we could. But we can’t.”

“Oh, that’s okay. I’m sure you guys want time to do guy stuff or something. I’m sure Meredith is around somewhere.”

The guys shared a look.

“You guys are totally acting weird. What’s going on?”

“Don’t be upset,” Adrian said. “Meredith and Shannon went shopping.”

That totally blew. I’d been dying to get off campus. The fence had been majorly creeping in on me the past few days. Maybe I’d just take my car and go for a drive. Grab some pizza and read a book.

Chris cleared his throat. “Look. You can’t leave.”

“What!” Now I was pissed.

Adrian raised an eyebrow. “You can’t leave campus.”

That irked me. Why was I just now hearing about this? “So what, I’m a prisoner?” These boys were driving me nuts. “I really wish everyone would stop beating around the bush and just tell me what the hell I need to know.”

A scuffle came from under the table. Chris groaned as Adrian’s foot made contact.

“You’re not in control yet,” Adrian said. “Until you get a handle on your wolf, you can’t leave campus.”

That was bullshit. “I’d never hurt anyone.”

“Think about the past few days,” Chris said. “You’ve been all over the place. We don’t know what could happen, and if you were honest with yourself, you’d know it’s true.”

His words stung more than they should have. Even if they were a little right. I had a bit of an adjustment problem. It should be completely understandable, but I shouldn’t be punished for it.

I pushed back from the table. “Got it. Thank you for telling me.” They called to me, but I didn’t stop. I had to find Mr. Dawson.

As I got closer to his cabin, I heard people yelling. I moved up the porch steps as quietly as I could. I leaned my ear close to the door.

“—completely out of control,” Mr. Dawson said. “If he’s—”

“We need proof,” Sebastian said, his German accent thick with frustration. “Real proof! We cannot go to the rest of the Seven with your word.”

“We’re being attacked every night. The guys can’t keep this up indefinitely. We have to find out what Rupert’s planned before he destroys us,” Michael said, his voice a low growl. “I’ll read him—”

“Not going to happen. If we don’t have proof, bringing him in will rip us apart. We’re already divided, nearly evenly.” Donovan’s Irish lilt came through the door. “We cannot afford to be wrong. If ya—”

I took a step closer to the door. The board squeaked.

“Wait. We have a visitor.” The door swung open to reveal Mr. Dawson’s angry glare. “Is there something I can help you with?”

Yes. I want you to continue talking so I can finish eavesdropping.
But I couldn’t say that. “Uuuh… I want to go to the movies with Chris and Adrian.”

“You’ve got superb timing, my dear. Talk to her, Michael.” Sebastian clapped Mr. Dawson on the back as he walked out the door with Donovan. “I think you need to calm down a bit before we continue this.”

Well that didn’t go as planned. “I’ll be with the guys. I won’t hurt anyone.”

Mr. Dawson stepped into his tiny kitchen. “Would you like a cup of tea?” he asked, but he didn’t wait for my answer. His movements were jerky as he opened a cupboard and filled a dented metal kettle.

I took a seat in his breakfast nook. I didn’t think of Mr. Dawson as a tea type. More like coffee or beer. He slammed the kettle onto the stove and switched the gas on.

No wonder the damned thing was dented.

He set a mug and tea bag in front of me. When the kettle whistled, he joined me at the table and poured the water.

I cleared my throat. “So I was right about Mr. Hoel? He’s planning something big, right?”

“You’re more trouble than I thought.” I opened my mouth to ask another question but he shook his head. “You’ve got more than enough on your plate with everything else going on. I’m handling this.” He took a sip of his tea. “Or trying to,” he said under his breath.

I crossed my arms. “I can handle it.”

“I’m sure you could, pup.”

I’d have to figure out more about Mr. Hoel when Meredith got back from her shopping exposition. Which brought me back to why I was there to see Mr. Dawson in the first place. “Why can’t I leave campus?”

“Because you won’t be ready to be around humans until you’ve embraced your wolf.”

“I’d never—”

He held up a hand. “Don’t make promises that you might not be able to keep. It’s going to be a hard transition—”

“It
is
hard. Nothing ‘going to be’ about it.”

His mouth curved into a smile. “It
is
hard. I know you don’t want to hear it, but this will—”

“Take time,” I finished for him. I was exhausted from how many times I’d heard that lately. “I could just take my car and hit the road.”

He lifted an eyebrow.

Right. Probably a bad idea. Especially now that I’d brought it up. “How long till I can do normal stuff?”

“That’s entirely up to you. It could be tomorrow. It could be a year from now. I’d love to give you a firm date, but I can’t.”

Fan-freaking-tastic. “Is there anything I can do to change your mind? I’m only asking for a couple of hours off campus. And I’d be with Adrian and Chris. They wouldn’t let—”

“No.”

“This is totally unfair.” I rolled my eyes at my own cliché. I should be ashamed of myself. I sounded like a petulant teen.

His smile deepened, showing his teeth. “Every werewolf has gone through the same restrictions. That’s why they come to this school.”

That made me feel mildly better. “How long does it usually take? Give me a ballpark here.”

He shrugged. “You’re at one with your wolf when you’re at one with your wolf.”

Great. That wasn’t vague at all. “A girl could get mighty bored on campus 24-7. I can’t be held responsible for what I might do.”

He chuckled. “There’s plenty of studying for you to catch up on.”

I gave him an even stare. I finally had friends to go out and do stuff with, and I wasn’t about to waste my time twiddling my thumbs around campus.

“Here’s the deal. You do some learning and try to adjust to the wolf today, and if you’ve improved at all, we’ll see what we can do about tomorrow.”

“A surprise?”

He nodded.

“An off-campus surprise?”

“Not sure. We’ll have to see.” Mr. Dawson went to the small wooden bookcase and pulled a thin hardback from the middle shelf. “Read this. I’ll be back in a bit and we’ll talk about whatever you have questions about. Okay?”

I glanced down at the cover.
A Werewolf’s Bible
stared back at me. “I’ve got one of these.”

“Oh, so you’ve read it?” He said it in a higher pitch than his normal voice. The guy knew perfectly well I hadn’t read it.

“No, but—”

“Read.” He strode to the door. “I’ll be back in an hour.”

I was stubborn only for a little bit. I sipped my tea slowly. Mr. Dawson was insane for drinking hot tea when it was a million degrees outside.

I braced myself for the visions that would come. When the first wave of them was over, I began to read. I hadn’t finished the first chapter before the door slammed open.

“What are you doing here?” Dastien stomped over to me, his eyes a bright shade of amber. He was pissed and looking like a crazy-man.

“Reading.” What was his problem? I lifted my mug and took a sip while he stared.

He gave a desperate laugh and sank into the seat across from me. “I haven’t felt this out of control in years.” He leaned forward, putting his head in his hands. “No. I don’t think I was ever this inept.”

I should’ve felt bad for him, but I didn’t. It reassured me. If everyone thought Dastien was this awesome guy and he’d lost control, then me making an ass out of myself all the time maybe wasn’t such a big deal.

“Glad I’m not the only one feeling crazy.” I tugged on my ponytail. “Why’d you storm in here like that?”

He sat back. “It’s too embarrassing to admit.”

“That’s a stupid thing to say. Now you have to tell me.”

“I thought…” He scrunched his eyes closed. “I thought you and Michael…”

My mouth dropped open. “He’s like the principal!” A smile spread across my face. The guy was jealous and I loved it.

“Yeah well, he’s Alpha. He could handle you. If anyone here could take you from me…” Dastien let out a desperate sounding laugh. “I don’t know what my deal is. I just keep thinking that you’re going to change your mind about me. About us.”

“You’re saying that like it makes sense. Have you seen yourself?” I grinned when he started laughing. I picked up my book. “Everything has been out of my control lately. And now I found out I can’t leave campus.” I sighed dramatically. “I’m tired of not understanding. Ignorance isn’t bliss. It’s completely frustrating. I’m going to read this thing, and then I won’t feel so freaking lost all the time. So no distracting me.”