Awakening (8 page)

I shake my head and cling to Kylee’s arm.  She nudges me away from her body and answers for me.  “Mira was just saying that she was hungry, right Mira?”

“Come on, Mi.  The way Kylee looks right now, I don’t think she’s going back to get an autograph, unless they’re signing asses.”

“No, it’s okay, I really do want to meet the band.”  I don’t really care either way, but being alone with Skylar is terrifying.

“Well, okay then, to meet the band we go.”  Skylar puts my arm through his and knocks on the door.  I don’t think he realizes that he has to have a VIP ticket to get in.

“My club brother is a DJ here, I won’t have any problems,” Skylar whispers into my ear, reading my mind.  How does he do that?

“I think maybe I
will
take you up on that bite to eat.”  I see the way the bouncer is looking at me.  I look out of the corner of my eye to see the vein in Skylar’s neck pulsing. This is not good. 
Bad news bears.

“Sounds even better.  Kylee are you good?”

“I’m better than good, loves.  I’m fucking great.”  Kylee straightens her skirt and moves toward the bouncer.  He stares right at her ass as she walks by. 
What a fucking pig.

CHAPTER EIGHT

Mira

“Where exactly are we going, Sky?”

“Like I told Kylee, we’re going to get something to eat.  It’s high time we talked.”

Not that I mind talking to Skylar, I just don’t know if this is the right time.  I hadn’t planned on seeing him tonight.  I was prepared to spend the night dancing and laughing with Kylee and I have to admit, I’m kind of sad I don’t get to see the band backstage now that we’ve left. 

Even with the frustration of the situation, I can’t help but feel that electrical current that shoots up my spine when Skylar places his hand on the small of my back to lead me out of The Fillmore.  I wonder if he feels this energy, too.

When we’re outside the venue, Skylar takes the lead and grabs my hand.  The feeling of our palms touching is almost too much to bear.  I want his hands all over me and the emotions that are surging through my body solidify my dream. 
I love this man.  I want this man.  I need this man.

“Where’s your car?”

“I didn’t drive my car.  I rode.” God, even his smirk is sexy as sin. 

“Sky, I can’t get on the bike.  I just can’t.”  The fear of the accident starts to pulse through my veins and my heart rate is out of control.  I swear my heart is about to beat right out of my chest.  Slowly, the memories of the accident are flooding my brain.  I remember the pain and being so scared.

“Come on, Sweets.  It’s now or never.  You gotta get back on sometime.”

“Please, I’m scared.  I don’t think I can.  The last time I was on a bike …” I don’t even have to finish my statement because I can see the flash in his eyes.  I know he hasn’t forgotten the accident, but I don’t think he was thinking.  Then again, he wasn’t coming here expecting to pick me up.

“Let’s get you back inside and I’ll wait with you until Kylee is done.”

NO!  I want to go with you, but I can’t on the bike. 

“Sky, I can try.”  My voice comes out weak and unenthusiastic.

“I’m not going to push you, Sweets.  I know you’re scared and you don’t have to get on the bike.  I just don’t want you alone.  I wanted to talk, but tonight obviously isn’t a good night.”

No.  He doesn’t get to come here and rip me away from my friend and meeting the band and then just leave me.  We’re talking. 

I swallow my fear and walk to the bike.  Standing next to his GSX-R that is almost identical to Danny’s leaves me shaking; literally shaking with fear, but I’ll get over it.  I love riding.  I love being on the back of a bike.  I would be lying if I said that a little piece of me doesn’t want to know what riding with him is like.  Is it like my dream? 
Only one way to find out.

“Are you going to give me the spare helmet or are we just going to stand here?”  Yeah, the sass comes out.

“Mira, really, you don’t have to do this.”

“Did it ever occur to you that I
want
to do this?  I’ve never been a pushover, Skylar, and I’m not about to start now.  We’re going to talk.  You owe me that much.  You see me and go all caveman.  It’s time to clear the air.”

There’s that smirk again.  Skylar unlocks the rear cowl of the bike to unlatch the extra helmet.  Skylar puts on his helmet after he hands me the spare. 
Okay, deep breath, Mira.
  Skylar is straddling his seat waiting for me to take mine. 
You can do this.
  Before I lose the courage, I stand with my left foot on the peg and swing my other leg over the rear tire, placing it on the right peg.  Gripping Skylar’s shoulders, I slowly get in place. 

With my hands still on his shoulders, Skylar starts the bike.  I can feel his muscular thighs flex as he works the gears.  I try to remain neutral by placing my hands on his outer hips, refraining from wrapping myself around his waist.  I should have known that he wouldn’t allow that.  Skylar takes his hands off the handlebars and grabs mine roughly.  With my wrists still in his possession, he yanks them forward, leaving no space between our bodies; my chest is flush with his back.  I have no choice but to hold onto him for dear life as he takes off out of the parking lot.

The first few minutes are terrifying.  Every time he switches gears, my stomach threatens to empty its contents all over the back of him.  I’m keeping my composure, somehow, and I’m so happy I am; this is amazing.  I love being on the back of a bike, but this ride is something different; it’s liberating. 

I don’t have to let the accident ruin the things that I love.  I can live my life.  I’ve been given a blessing.  I’m alive. 

Embracing the gift I’ve been given, I tighten my grip on Skylar’s waist, lay my head down on his shoulder and enjoy the ride.  It feels like it’s only been a few minutes and we’re pulling up to a small diner in town.  Skylar parks on the street, puts the kickstand down and waits for me to move before he gets off.

“Are you okay?”  I know he’s waiting for me to say “no” but I just can’t.

“That was amazing, Sky.  Thank you so much.  I have never felt so alive.”  I fall into his chest and wrap my arms around his waist.  Skylar’s entire body tenses at my touch before he relaxes and hugs me back.

“Thank you,” I whisper.

“You’re most welcome, Sweets.  Let’s get you something to eat, yeah?”

“Yeah.”  I can’t hide the grin that’s plastered on my face. 

We walk into the diner and take a booth seat in the back, sitting on opposite sides of the table.  There’s not much time to talk before the waitress comes over and takes our order.   While we wait for our drinks to come back, I try to work my nerves up to have this conversation.

“What are you thinking about, Sweets?”

Well shit.
  Sometimes I really hate that he can read me like Kylee does.  A girl should be able to have her own thoughts without someone calling her out. 

“I’m thinking about what I want to say to you.”

“When I saw you at The Fillmore, I knew I had to talk to you.  It’s not going to be something you want to hear, but we have to talk about it.”

I think there is a giant fat turtle sitting in my throat.  I can’t breathe, let alone talk.  He’s about to wreck my world and there’s nothing I can do about it.

“Go ahead, Skylar.” It’s time for me to be stoic Mira.  No time for the ‘I love you and want you in my life’ Mira.

“Danny’s hurting, Mira.  He’s in a really bad spot.  He misses you.  You probably should fix this problem, soon.  I don’t know how much more of his moping I can take before I lose it.”

“What do you expect me to do?  You heard the conversation; I need time.  I can’t be with him while I’m processing all of these feelings I have for you.”

“Mira, I don’t even want to pretend to understand what you’ve been through.  But one thing I know is you and Danny are meant to be together.  I saw it when you first met and I still see it.  You need to push away those feelings for me and fix things with Danny.”

“You said you loved me.  You said we would figure this out.  What happened to that guy and who is this person in his place?”  I almost choke on my words.  I shouldn’t have to do this alone.  He made a promise to me and he should honor that.  If I can’t trust his word, how can I trust him?

“I
do
love you.  I
did
figure this out.  You’re place is with Danny, not me.  I can’t be the person you want.  I can’t be the person you need.  Danny’s the guy that will make your dreams come true.  I’m just the guy that will tide you over until you run back to him because I’m not what you need.  Trust me.”  Skylar must be fighting the same feelings I am.  I’m literally watching his face contort, trying not to let the emotions show.

“Is this really what you want me to do?  You want me to ignore everything we feel for each other and marry Danny?  Do you want to watch me build a life with a man that I don’t love the way I should?”

“Yes,” Skylar whispers.

“Fine.  Take me home, please.  I’ve lost my appetite.”  I stand from my seat, taking my ground.  I know why he’s saying this and why he’s pushing me away, but I don’t have to like it.  I certainly don’t have to sit here with him and share a meal like we’re best friends.

“The apartment or the house?” Skylar asks.

“The apartment, please.”

CHAPTER NINE

Danny

The last few days without Mira have been hell.  Knowing she’s healthy and alive, but not with me stings.  It hurts worse than I could’ve imagined.  Seven weeks without her and then another week in the hospital, just to have her come home with me and run back to Kylee.   
She didn’t run back to Kylee, jackass, she ran from you.  And Skylar.

I can’t talk to Skylar about any of this and that adds to the torture.  For so long, Skylar and I have been able to talk about anything; no matter what.  I know he has feelings for Mira.  I heard him tell her just that in the hospital.  I tried to brush it off, but hearing Skylar and Mira interact when she was leaving, confirmed every fear I ever had; I can’t compete with Skylar. 

The bond we all had in college is slowly slipping away.  Instead of the accident pulling us all closer, it appears that it’s tearing us apart; Kylee has a new guy in her life and Skylar’s with the club more and more.

 Skylar took off a few hours ago to do something and Mira hasn’t called me wanting to talk.  I know she said she needs time, but how much time do I give her to make up her mind?  I know she’s going to pick Skylar; the girls always choose Skylar. 

Instead of watching TV in the living room, I take my cell phone and laptop to my room to hang out.  I spend a few minutes checking my Facebook and Twitter, but there’s nothing new to keep me occupied.  I try to watch some videos on YouTube but that only reminds me of college; before the accident. 

Unable to get Mira out of my head, I pick up my phone to call her.  I unlock the screen and am staring at the most beautiful green eyes I have ever seen.  The wallpaper picture was taken right after I proposed to Mira.  She was lit up like Christmas morning; she was so happy. 
You can’t call her, let her come to you.  Give her the time she needs.

I scroll through my contacts until I find Melissa’s number.  We haven’t talked more than a few times since Mira woke up.  I don’t even know if she will still talk to me, but I need someone to talk to that isn’t wrapped up in this mess.  I send a quick feeler text.

ME – Hey stranger.

MELISSA – Hey u!  What’s up?

ME – Nothin just checkin on u.  Hows ur grandpa?

MELISSA – They sent him home with hospice.  Won’t be too long now.

ME – I’m so sry Mel, r u ok?

MELISSA – It’s been a long time comin. How’s Mira?

ME – Long story.  Haven’t talked to her in days.

MELISSA – Anything I can do?

ME – Ha! Got a few hours and a bottle of tequila?

MELISSA – Ur by campus right? 

ME – Yea, y?

MELISSA – Send me ur address.  B there in 20.

I send Melissa my address before I realize what I’ve done.  Mira has a huge problem with Melissa and I basically just invited her over.  She’s my friend, nothing more, but Mira won’t see it that way.  I think about texting Mira to tell her that I’m going to hang out with Melissa for a while, but for some reason, I decide not to. 

Why start an unnecessary fight, right?

I start straightening up the living room, so it looks less like a bachelor pad, when the doorbell rings.  I open the door to see Melissa standing on the porch dangling a fifth of tequila by the neck of the bottle.

“Dr. Mel is here,” she jokes, walking through the door and into the living room.

“Dr. Mel, huh?”

“Yeah.  Everyone needs a little tequila in their life.  Take some Vitamin T and call me in the morning.  Now get some shot glasses and spill your guts.  We’ll figure out how to fix this problem.”

Doing as Melissa asks, I get the shot glasses and salt from the kitchen.  We’re in luck; I have a few limes in the fridge.  I slice them quickly and go back into the living room.  Melissa has taken off her shoes and is sitting Indian style on the couch.  I take the seat at the opposite end of the couch and sit facing her.  Setting out the shot glasses on the coffee table, I pour the correct dosage and pass one to Melissa.

“Here’s to meeting great friends in hospitals when our worlds were falling apart,” I say, raising my glass.  Melissa follows suit.  Our glasses clink, I lick the salt off my hand, tip the shot back, letting the tequila light a fire all the way down my throat before taking the lime in my mouth.

“Okay, Danny, spill.  What’s going on with Mira?”

“I don’t even know how to explain it.  She told me that she wanted to put our engagement on hold so she can figure out who she is.  She had some kind of dream while she was in a coma where she and Skylar were a couple.  I died in the accident and she was all alone.  Now she’s having some conflicting emotions.”