Autumn's Wish (18 page)

“Por favor, ¿Puedo hablar con Amalita? Se acaba de tomar un segundo.”

After we've had such a good time together, how can she say no to me seeing Ames for just a second? She pretends to consider, but she's already smiling, and soon I'm knocking on Amalita's door before opening it up and shutting it behind me.

Unlike my own room, Ames's is perfectly neat. Cluttered with jewelry stands and makeup kits and accessory shelves and mirrors and extra clothing racks to hold the outfits that don't fit in her closet, but neat. Her bed is even made…with an Amalita-shaped lump tucked right in the middle of her fuchsia-and-black tiger-striped comforter.

I sit next to the lump.

“Ames?”

“Go away, Autumn. I'm never leaving this room ever again.”

“Really?” I ask. “ 'Cause I don't think there's a bathroom in here, and at a certain point—”

Ames flips the covers off her and sits up. She's wearing an amazingly conservative tent of a nightgown, with long sleeves and a ruffled neckline. The remnants of last night's makeup make dark circles under her eyes, and her hair is a frizzed-out fright wig screaming out from her head in all directions.

“You saw the picture?” she asks.

“Yeah, I saw it,” I admit.

“Then you know I can never show my face again,” she says. She lies back down, turns away from me, and cuddles the comforter up to her chin. I move to the other side of the bed and crouch down so I can look her in the eye.

“What happened?”

She sighs heavily.

“I don't remember sending the picture to Zander. I woke up this morning and my head was throbbing and I was so sick and I checked my phone and I saw it.”

She messes with her phone and then tosses it to me. It's an outgoing text to Zander. The picture…preceded by a note that says:

Dance w/Corbin all u want—can she give u THIS???

There's no response text from Zander. I wince. “How did you find out other people had it?”

She just raises her eyebrow.

“Other people
did
text you?” I guess.

“Texted, emailed, called…some
freshman
sent me a link. At first there were five versions of that picture. An hour later there were thirty.”

I hurt inside for her because I know
exactly
how she feels. My first year at Aventura, Reenzie put up a horrible website about me and I was positive I'd have to move away and hide under a rock for the rest of my life.

“I can't believe I did something so stupid,” Ames moans. “Now Zander will never want me again.”

“Are you kidding me?!” I snap. “This guy sent your private picture to the entire world, and you're worried he won't
want
you?!”

“You don't know how many people he sent it to,” Ames retorts. “Maybe he sent it to just one person. Maybe one of his friends took his phone and
he
sent it around. You don't know.”

“Ames, for real—”

“Just go, okay?” she asks. “I wanna sleep. I still have a headache.”

She burrows back under the blankets.

“Ames…”

She fake snores. She's done.

“Fine,” I say. “But I've been there, remember? It'll get better. And if you want to talk, just call me, okay?” I rest a hand on the part of the under-the-covers lump I think is her back. She doesn't respond. “Love you, Ames,” I say.

I hate to leave her like this, but I don't know what else to do. I spend the rest of the day texting and talking about the situation with Reenzie and Taylor, but it doesn't help. Reenzie's totally unsympathetic. She thinks Ames brought this on herself the second she sent the picture. Taylor and I totally disagree—Ames had no clue Zander would betray her and show the picture around—but we're both still clueless about how to make it better. We figure the best we can do is be there for her while we all wait for it to blow over.

In the meantime, I tell myself, maybe something good will come out of the whole thing. Maybe this will be the thing that takes her off the path I keep seeing in her future and makes everything better.

That's what I'm still hoping the next morning, when I walk into school looking around for Ames. She hasn't returned any of my calls, emails, or tests, but if she does show up, I want to make sure I'm right there by her side.

I don't see her anywhere, but I
do
find Carrie Amernick waiting by my locker. She's clearly not happy. Her mouth is set in a grim line, her hands are on her hips, and smoke is coming out of her ears.

Immediately, I freeze. Did J.J. tell her about Saturday night? Is that why she's so angry? Did he tell her that we kissed and he realized he wants me back?

“Hey, Carrie,” I say warily. “What's up?”

“Your time on the Senior Social Committee,” she says in a clipped voice. “
That's
what's up. You completely blew off cleanup duty yesterday.”

Prickles of guilt crawl over my skin, having nothing to do with the fact that I threw myself at her boyfriend. “Carrie, I'm so sorry!” I say. “I totally forgot! Some family stuff came up, and then—”

“Don't want to hear it,” she cuts me off. “You were fine enough to email Gus. He said he heard from you and you didn't even
mention
the cleanup, never mind apologize for not being there to help.”

“I know,” I agree. “That's what I'm saying—I totally blanked. But—”

Carrie puts up a hand, stopping me. “Don't want to hear it. You shirk your duty, you're out of the sisterhood. Period.” Then she leans in closer and bares her teeth, which I swear she filed into fangs. “We also don't allow sisters who try to steal what isn't theirs. I know what you did with J.J., and it didn't work. We're back together, we're totally in love, and we even made a deal. I won't talk to Keith Hamilton again, and he won't talk to you again. Ever.” She stalks away, then turns back, a sweet smile on her face. “Oh. He won't be tutoring you anymore either. Yeah, I know about that.”

She turns and flounces down the hall.

I'm stunned, but I actually don't take her that seriously. J.J. might get distant again, but he's not going to stop talking to me entirely. I mean, he can't. We have all the same friends. And besides, he still has feelings for me. I know it. I
felt
it. No way would he avoid me forever.

That's what I think, but then I don't see him all morning. Not even in passing. It's not completely unheard of, but it makes me wonder the littlest bit if he might be specifically avoiding places I'll be.

Lunch cinches it. I grab my tray and bring it to the spot where we always eat…and no one's there. I stand there, all alone, holding my tray. I spin around slowly, searching for my group. Taylor's nowhere, but that doesn't surprise me. She told me she was going to try to get off campus and meet Drew for lunch as often as she can. Ames isn't around, but she texted me in the morning to tell me she's playing sick—she's too mortified to come to school at all.

Finally I see J.J., Jack, and Carrie. They're sitting and eating with Kassie and a group of Carrie's other girlfriends far across the lawn.

Is Jack mad at me too? Or is it just that I was there when he freaked out on Tom and Gus and he doesn't want to talk about it? Either way, same thing. He chose Team Carrie.

Reenzie and Sean I find eating with a bunch of the other football players. I don't go over to them. I don't want to seem
that
lame. But Reenzie catches me looking and then pulls out her phone. I get the text:

More college recruiters coming this week. Sean wants to keep his distance so you don't mess anything up. Sorry!!!!

So that's it. My friends have all ditched me.

“So wait,” Jenna asks. “Amalita's been out of school for all this time?”

It's three weeks later, and I'm spending my lunch period on the phone with Jenna. I'm eternally grateful our lunches sync up. It's the only thing that makes the period bearable.

“Yeah,” I say. “She convinced her parents she's horribly ill and can barely get out of bed. They've dragged her to a bunch of doctors for all kinds of tests, but she says it's still better than facing everyone at school.”

“And everyone else is still avoiding you?”

“J.J., Carrie, and Jack, yeah,” I say. “Sean too. Reenzie isn't, but she's always with Sean, so she kinda is. Tee and I are cool, but she's always with Drew, so I don't see her that much, I basically just hang by myself, and work on my grades and college applications.”

I sigh. I have more to say, but it's hard, and I'm not sure I want to say it out loud. Finally I do.

“Jenna…,” I begin, “do you think this was my dad's plan?”

“What do you mean?” she asks.

“Do you think he knew I'd use the locket to mess everything up and make my life miserable?”

“Autumn, that's crazy. Why would your dad do that?”

I shrug. “I was so freaked out about graduating and leaving. And now…” I sigh again. “I don't know…I feel like maybe it'll be a relief to go, since everything is so bad.”

Jenna takes a second to think. “I don't buy it. Your dad's not like that. He wants you to make the future better, but he'd also want you to be happy
now.
”

“You're right,” I agree. “I just don't know what else to try.”

“Another jump?” Jenna suggests. “Maybe the future will help you figure out what to do next.”

“I only have five left,” I say. “I want to use them when I know I've made some kind of change. Everything here's been the same kind of awful since the Scare Pair dance.” The corners of my mouth curl in a smile. “One cool thing happened, though,” I say. “I got my SAT scores.”

“You did?!” Jenna squeals. “How did you not tell me?! We've been waiting for this!”

I laugh. There was actually some kind of computer snag with my scores, so it took longer for them to come out than we thought. Jenna's been as anxious as me to hear. “Okay, you ready for this?” I ask. Then I tell her.

“That's
huge
!” she shrieks.

“I know!” I'm grinning now; I can't help it. “My mom's losing her mind.”

“How is this not jumpworthy?!” Jenna wails. “Getting into a great college can change everything!”

“I know,” I admit, “but it's not like I'm in anywhere yet.”

“But still…”

I laugh out loud. “You just want me to jump so you make sure you still end up with Simon.”

“Yes!” she agrees. “He's perfect for me! I need to know he's still out there!”

“I promise I'll find out as soon as I can,” I say. “But now doesn't feel right.”

Jenna grudgingly relents, and we hang up so we can both get back to class.

Talking to her always makes me feel better. I sail through the rest of the day, then go home to find Mom in a cleavage-y little black dress. She has a full face of makeup.

“Whoa,” I say. “You're all dressed up. I thought we were going to Aglio.”

“We are,” she says breathlessly, “but I thought it would be nice to dress up for the celebration. Erick's already upstairs showering.”

Anything that gets Erick into the shower is good for me, so I'm on board. I run upstairs and shower and primp until I'm all set in a little red sundress. Erick's in nice khakis and a button-down shirt. He looks good. He even eased off the body spray, which I take as a personal congratulatory gift.

“Falls, table for four?” Mom tells the host when we get to the restaurant.

“Four?” I ask as we're led to our seats. “Is Eddy coming?

“No,” Mom says. “Not Eddy.”

Her voice is shaky. Why is her voice shaky?

“I invited someone else,” she continues shakily. “Someone I want you to meet.”