Atheism For Dummies (For Dummies (Religion & Spirituality)) (90 page)

This last one’s especially important. Being out makes it easier for others to be out, which makes it harder to stereotype nonbelievers, which causes attitudes to evolve. It has worked precisely this way for gays and lesbians, and it has the same effect for atheists.

Some atheists respond by shouting from the rooftops, framing every gesture and message in terms of atheism. Some choose more subtle ways, like

Wearing a T-shirt or jewelry from a freethought organization or event

Posting comments or sharing videos or other links on social media that gradually reveal a nontheistic perspective

Offering a nontheistic “grace” at a family gathering

Finding opportunities to express a nontheistic opinion in conversation

Respectfully refraining from some religious practices or events, or modifying their participation

And nothing is as powerful as simply being out and normal. If all the stigma and fear were set aside for a single day, and every nonbeliever revealed his or her atheism to friends and family, it would change the public perception overnight. Atheism would no longer be some unthinkable opinion held by ill-defined “others” somewhere out there, but a normal part of the diversity of belief in families and communities everywhere.

Chapter 18

Getting the Best of Religion . . . and Leaving the Rest

In This Chapter

Understanding why people (really) go to church

Making human communities

Commemorating life

Doing good together

M
ention “church” to ten different atheists and you may get ten different reactions. Some turn red with anger at the very word, seeing a place of manipulation, ignorance, and fear. Some are indifferent to it. Others are fascinated by the window it gives into the human mind and heart. Many atheists feel a sense of loss when they think of church, even a little envy, whereas others feel nothing but pure relief at leaving church and religion behind.

The difference has a lot to do with a person’s past history. If I feel I was lied to and abused or frightened into belief as a child, resentment is an understandable reaction and can last a lifetime. If I never darkened the door of a church in my life, the whole thing may just be mystifying to me. But a large and possibly growing number of atheists see the benefits people get from belonging to a church community and want those same human benefits without having to park their own beliefs and convictions at the door.

So what are those benefits? Among others, religion offers the following:

An established community that connects people to each other

A pre-defined set of values and beliefs

Common language and symbols that capture complex ideas

Rituals to mark life transitions

A sense of wonder, a way to transcend the mundane

Comforting answers to big questions

Consoling explanations to ease hardship and loss

A way to join with others in doing good, such as volunteering and charitable giving, as a direct expression of what a person believes

I can happily do without some of these benefits. For all the time and effort it saves, I don’t want my values and beliefs defined for me, and I’d rather not have comforting answers at the expense of actual ones. But other benefits on this list address real human needs that don’t go away when a person stops believing in God. Some needs, like the desire to be part of a supportive community, can even increase after a person no longer thinks a caring God can offer that support.

This chapter looks at the benefits of theistic religion and church, and the many ways nontheists are finding those same benefits without God.