Aria (10 page)

A
IDEN said good-bye to Sam the next morning, standing on the sidewalk in front of Jules and Jason’s apartment building. He had wanted to go to the airport with Sam, but with an early makeup call for the afternoon matinee performance, he just didn’t have the time. The taxi driver had already put Sam’s bags in the trunk and now sat patiently, her eyes focused straight ahead, as Sam and Aiden held each other. Rain began to fall, creating a light mist as it hit the warm pavement. The smell of asphalt mingled with the crisp scent of the rain.

“Sam, I’d like to see you—”
“Shhh.” Sam kissed Aiden. “This was the best vacation I’ve had in years. I’m so glad I got to see you again. And the opera was wonderful.”
It wasn’t what Aiden had expected to hear—or maybe it simply wasn’t what he
wanted
to hear.
I knew all along it was just going to be a fling. He has a life in the States, and my life is here. Let it go.
“Thanks.” Aiden hoped he sounded convincing.
The taxi driver honked the horn and glared at them.
“I’d better go. Can’t miss my flight. Stacey’s probably tearing her hair out managing things at the firm by herself.”
Aiden forced a laugh. “We wouldn’t want that.”
“Thanks again, Aiden. This was great.”
“It was.” The truth, although not the entire truth. Aiden fought the urge to ask Sam if they could see each other again when he was back in the US in July. But he wouldn’t. He could sense the distance Sam was already creating between them. Subtle but undeniable. And yet….
“Take care of yourself.”
“You too, Sam.”
Aiden kissed Sam briefly on the lips; then Sam turned and slipped inside the cab. A moment later the car had pulled away. The rain began to fall harder as Aiden headed back to his hotel.

A
STRING quartet played softly in the background. Beethoven, Jason had told him, although he could have said it was The Who and Sam would have believed him.

Sam hadn’t planned on flying up to Connecticut for David Somers’s fortieth birthday celebration. When Jules and Jason called to invite him a few months after he returned from his Paris vacation, he tried to bow out gracefully, saying he’d be happy to meet them in New York City afterward. But then David himself called—Sam guessed the conductor hoped to reassure him that it wasn’t just Jules and Jason’s idea that he come to David’s family’s estate. Sam had been hardpressed to turn David down. He honestly liked the man, and although they hadn’t spent much time together in Paris, Sam couldn’t think of a good reason to turn him down.

The trip was hardly a disappointment. Sam spent two days skiing in Vermont with Jason (Jules watched them from the warmth of the ski lodge), then headed down to David’s palatial estate. There, he’d spent a day shopping for antiques in a nearby town with Jules, Jason, and David’s sister, Rachel. Still, as he mingled about the guests— musicians, mostly—he couldn’t help but think about Aiden and the party at Jules and Jason’s apartment months before.

He’d known Aiden wanted to see him again after Paris. And yet, as he stood on the Paris street with the taxi idling a few feet away, he hesitated. He didn’t know why. The weeks he spent in Paris at Aiden’s side had been wonderful. The sex had been a revelation. He’d watched Aiden’s face as the taxi pulled away. He saw the look of disappointment there, but he’d told himself it was unrealistic. Their lives were so completely different. He couldn’t have asked Aiden to come to Philly for more than a quick visit any more than Aiden could ask him to come to Europe.

No, if he were being honest with himself, he’d call his hesitation what it was: fear. Pure and simple. The kind of paralyzing fear he hadn’t felt since Aiden mentioned the scholarship years before. And he’d given in to it, knowing what it was but helpless to do anything about it. But what was he so afraid of?

“Is something wrong?” Jules asked. Sam guessed that Jules had been standing next to him for a minute or so, but he simply hadn’t noticed. He’d been too busy looking around, trying to see if Aiden had come.

Only it’d be better if Aiden were here.
“I’m glad you came.” Jules took his hand and led him over to the
enormous glass doors that opened onto the patio.
It was too cold to go outside, and the snow lay thick on the
ground, but Sam could see the lake shimmer in the moonlight. The
snow had stopped falling nearly an hour ago, and he was happy he’d
planned to stay a few more days. Apparently the blizzard had paralyzed
the entire eastern seaboard. Jason suggested they go cross-country
skiing around the estate tomorrow.
Jason, Alex, and David stood by the doors, sipping champagne
and chatting about Italy. David flagged down one of the servers, and
Sam soon acquired a glass and joined the conversation. Somewhere
between the third or fourth glass of champagne, Sam caught Jules
looking over at Jason, who glanced briefly at his watch. In retrospect,
Sam should have realized something was up, but the champagne had
gone straight to his head, and he wasn’t thinking clearly enough to put
the pieces together.
“Excuse me.” Jason handed his still full champagne flute to a
passing server. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
It was nearly one in the morning when Sam saw Jason again. Sam
was heading to his room, having danced until his feet hurt. His head
was spinning from the alcohol, and he yawned as he reached the large
landing on the main staircase.
“Tired?” Jason asked as they passed each other on the stairs. His
hair looked damp, as if he’d been outside, and his cheeks were ruddy
from the cold.
“Rachel just about wore me out on that last dance. I figured I’d
call it a night. You going back down to the party?”
Jason smiled. “Had to run an errand. I promised Jules we’d play a
little once the crowd thinned.”
“I could come back down.” Sam didn’t want to be rude. “Don’t sweat it. David’s planned a small dinner tomorrow—
you’ll get to hear us play then.”
“You sure?”
“Sure. Besides, you look beat.”
“All right. Tell Jules good night for me.”
“Will do.”
Sam climbed up the last flight of stairs and headed down the long
hallway toward his room. He had almost reached the door when he
nearly walked headlong into one of the other guests.
Except that it wasn’t just one of the other guests. Sam’s heart rate
accelerated when he saw who it was.
“Sam?” The look of pleasant surprise on Aiden’s face appeared
genuine.
“Aiden? I didn’t expect to see you here.” Sam couldn’t help but
stare. Aiden wore a tuxedo that skimmed the planes of his body. His
cheeks were slightly pink, and his hair, which had grown longer since
Sam had last seen him, was pulled back at the nape of his neck in a
short ponytail and was damp.
“I wasn’t going to come,” Aiden admitted. “I was singing at City
Opera and I figured that with the snow delays on the train lines, it’d be
so late when I finally got here, it wasn’t worth it. But Jason said he’d
pick me up at the station with David’s Jeep, and….” His voice trailed
off and then he laughed.
“This isn’t a coincidence,” Sam said, finally putting the pieces
together. “Is it?”
“Nope. Not if I know Jules and Jason.”
Sam shook his head. “You’d think, knowing them like we do,
we’d have guessed they’d pull something like this.”
“I’m sorry, Sam. If I’d realized—”
“I’m not sorry,” Sam interrupted. “I’d been sort of hoping you
might come. I was disappointed you hadn’t shown.”
“Really?”
Sam smiled. “Yeah.”
The color on Aiden’s cheeks deepened as he said, “I’m glad.” “So how about I join you for a dance, then?”
“Would you?” A hint of a smile played on Aiden’s lips. “Damn straight. Besides, we wouldn’t want to disappoint Jules
and Jason, would we?”
Sam grinned. “Hell no.”
Aiden put out his hand, and Sam took it. Together, they
descended the stairs to the party below.

“
E
VERY good Southern boy needs to know how to dance
,” Aiden’s mother had told him when he’d balked at his lessons at Miss Felicity’s Dance Studio. In the end, dancing had been a skill that served him well in his career, although he’d never liked it much. At least not until tonight. With Sam at his side, he silently thanked Miss Felicity. Sam, too, was a good dancer, equally comfortable with a Carolina shag as with a waltz, it seemed.

“What are you grinning about?” Sam asked as they moved together for a slow dance.
“Just wondering what Miss Felicity would say about my choice of dance partners.” When Sam raised an eyebrow, Aiden explained, “You know, the big-boned lady who rapped you on your hand when you stepped on the girls’ feet?”
Sam laughed. “Mine would have approved. Mr. Simpson. Twenty-nine. Retired from the local ballet company. First man I ever realized was gay. He taught me to samba. I caught him and Mr. Marsden, my gym teacher, making out in the back room one night before class.”
“Sounds a lot nicer than Miss Felicity.”
“You could say that.” Sam’s expression was one of unadulterated mischief.
“You
didn’t
!” Aiden swung Sam around and stared at him.
“I learned about more than dancing that summer,” Sam admitted with a sly grin. “I wonder if my mother knew about me being gay and was trying to steer me toward role models even back then.”
“Better than learning about sex behind the convenience store. Somehow I never figured my first sexual experience would be shoved up against a dumpster with my sister’s ex-boyfriend.” Aiden closed his eyes briefly as he leaned on Sam’s shoulder. “Last I heard, Eddie was married with three kids.” He wondered if Eddie was happy.
“You ever think about having kids?”
“Sometimes. Then I look at some of my colleagues and I remind myself what a stupid idea it would be. I’ve got a friend—a soprano— who has a ten-year-old son. He traveled with her when he was young, but once he started school….” Aiden shook his head.
“Seems like that would be a great experience for a kid, traveling around the world.”
“She was lucky. Her husband was a pianist and vocal coach, so he traveled with them sometimes.” The music ended and Aiden gestured to a table at the far end of the room, away from the band. “I heard they’d gotten divorced a few years ago.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“So was I.” Aiden had always seen Grace and her family as a ray of hope that maybe someday, he’d be able to find someone and settle down. “Not that I could blame her husband.” He didn’t add that Grace admitted she’d cheated on her husband with her costar in the production of
La Traviata
Aiden had also sung in. It was too close to home.

A
T FOUR o’clock in the morning, the band finally packed up. Aiden and Sam had danced some more. After a few more drinks, Aiden volunteered to sing a few arias with David Somers on piano, though Aiden admitted to Sam that he didn’t much like performing at parties. “For David, though,” Aiden told him, “I’d sing an entire opera in my underwear, standing on my head.”

“I’d like that.” Sam’s cheeks were ruddy from dancing and alcohol. He leaned forward and touched his lips to Aiden’s. “I’ve missed you, Aiden.” Aiden could hear the strain in Sam’s voice at the admission. “Seems like I always miss you when I leave.”

“Then don’t leave.” Aiden hadn’t meant to say it quite that way— he’d only meant to reassure Sam—but he realized he was talking about more than spending the night together. He took Sam’s hand and led him to his room, then pulled him inside and closed the door behind them.

“I’m not really good at this.” Sam combed his fingers through Aiden’s damp hair. “Relationships. Not since Nicky. I shouldn’t have let you go again in Paris.”

Aiden’s breath caught in his throat. “It’s not like I can offer you much.” Aiden believed the words but still wished they weren’t true. “My life’s pretty crazy, with all the traveling I do.” He knew they were both thinking about Grace and her family.

“I know. But does that mean it would never work? We’re not kids anymore. It’s not like we’re expecting things to be perfect. Besides, my work’s hectic too.”

Aiden took a slow, steady breath, then said, “I’ve got the place in Alabama again in April. You could come down. We could spend some time together. Even if it’s only for a day or two.”

“Seriously?” Sam kissed the top of Aiden’s head. “I’d love to. And maybe you could come to Philly for a visit between now and then. Only if you’re in the States, of course,” he added quickly.

“I’m back in the US at the end of December. You have any plans for New Year’s?” He knew he sounded like an overly excited kid, but he couldn’t help himself.

“None. That’d be perfect.” This time Sam leaned down and caught his lips.
God, but Sam tasted so good! In spite of his exhaustion, Aiden smiled and said, “How about a shower before sleep?”
“It’s a snow day, right? We can sleep as long as we want.”