Angelborn (10 page)

His words hit me, but they’re hard to believe. “A choice? How can they make a choice? Most of what people believe about death and the afterlife seems to be complete bullshit. So what are they basing this choice on? Do you tell them what choosing to stay here really means?” I shake my head. “I don’t think so.”

He looks at me like I’ve grown two heads. Intelligent eyes assess me, and I force myself not to cower under their intense regard.

“Do they get a second chance, at least?” I ask.

He nods. “But those are much harder to come by.” His speech is accented, though I can’t quite pick out from where. He takes a step closer to me. “How do you know so much about this?”

My bravado is gone. I shrink into myself. His stance is strong and confident — of course it is, he’s a friggin’ angel. He’s got all kinds of powers and could probably smite me where I stand. But he doesn’t look ready to smite, he looks curious.

“I can see them,” I tell him. “I can see you, in your angel form. The dead are everywhere, it’s like they’re infecting the earth. It’s irresponsible.”

He takes a step closer, and a chill descends on me. I find myself backed against the brick wall.

“You’re not a Vulture, are you?” I whisper.

This makes him pause. He tilts his head to the side. “A Vulture?”

“Angelic guardian of the Wasteland?”

An eyebrow cocks up. “I’ll have to tell them that’s what you call them. But how could you know about them?”

My mouth snaps shut. No way am I telling him about Caleb.

He studies me as you would a spider before crushing it. “I’m not a Guardian. Though what I cannot figure out is what exactly you
are
.”

I shrug my shoulders. “Just a fucked-up human. Not much to figure out.”

“I cannot read you.”

“Sorry?”

He reaches out and before I can move, his hand covers my forehead. I don’t feel his skin on me, but a glow that encompasses his hand. All of a sudden, something inside me shuts off. I stagger away from him, feeling the same emptiness, the same lightness I felt when Caleb removed my power.

I stumble to the mouth of the alley and look out. The mother with her stroller exits the coffee shop alone. The man standing in the street is gone.

“You took it.” I spin around, surprised to find the angel standing very close to me.

“Maia,” he says. “You’re a very interesting girl.”

“Who are you?” My breath hitches.

“I am Helix,” he says, holding out his hand. I hesitate before reaching out to shake it. His hand is smooth and cool, not warm and comforting like Caleb’s. A thread of fear snakes through me.

“How did you know my name?”

“You’re helping a fugitive.” He clicks his tongue, his blue eyes intense.

My heart stutters, and dread fills me. “Are you in my head?”

He squints slightly. “Your head is very intriguing. Your Sight was blocking me, but without it — your mind is simply radiant.” He smiles a huge, gleaming smile that transforms his face into something scarier. Charm and good looks and a layer of unhinged menace. I know that smile because I give it to people to keep them away, but I think this is just the way Helix looks.

“Are you going to turn him in?” The bottom drops out of my stomach. What the hell have I done? I should have kept my mouth shut. I should have stuck to the plan: ignore, ignore, ignore. If I’m responsible for Caleb being sent back … I never thought things could get worse, but I was so wrong.

“Why do you want to help him?” His face is inscrutable. I don’t know what he wants to hear, so I just tell the truth.

“He’ll remove my powers permanently once Genna agrees to bind him.”

“But I’ve already removed them. They’re gone.” He spreads his arms.

“I need them back.” One of his brows shoots up in surprise.

“But you hate the Sight. It’s the cause of every bad thing that’s ever happened to you.”

“Yes, but I promised to help him.” Besides, there’s something very untrustworthy about this angel. I’d rather pin my hopes on Caleb than on this unknown being.

Helix takes a step back and leans against the brick wall, crossing his arms and his ankles, looking very relaxed. I take a deep breath. “I need to be able to warn him when the Vultures are near. He’s got to get Genna to bind so he’ll have a soul … you must know all this.”

He closes his eyes as if he’s accessing the data in my head. It’s disconcerting knowing that someone is rooting around inside my thoughts and memories. “Human thoughts are so jumbled, they turn in on themselves constantly, especially when matters of the heart are concerned. Why do you care so much for the halfling?”

“Living in a place like the Wasteland with no hope? For eternity? To sacrifice everything for a chance at love?” The enormity of Caleb’s risk hits me, maybe for the first time. “To be loved like that?” I whisper to myself, then shake my head to clear away the forbidden longings that threaten to rear their heads.

“Please don’t turn him in. Have you been there? Do you know what it’s like? I don’t know where it is you come from, or what all the rules are, but you can’t send him back there — not when he has a real chance.”

Helix smiles. It’s a different smile, one full of mischief and maybe a little sadness. He pushes off from the wall and cups my face in his glowing palms without warning. His mouth is uncomfortably close to mine, and I hold very still. The Sight settles back across me like a heavy backpack on my shoulders.

A glance down the alley reveals the James Dean wannabe staring off into the distance.

I sag down into a crouch, holding my head in my hands. The burden is mine. I’ve borne it a long time. I can do it a little longer and save someone else some torment.

“Thank you,” I say weakly.

When I look up, Helix is heading off toward the street. I race to catch up with him, anxiety building.

“Where — where are you going?”

He grins at me and whistles a little. The hairs on the back of my neck prickle at the unexpected change in his demeanor. He seems lighter than when I first saw him, like some weight has been lifted from him as well.

“I agree with Caleb. Euphoria does get a bit dull. I think I’ll check things out around here.” He stops me with a gaze. “See how this all plays out.”

I swallow as dread settles across me, heavier than the Sight.

“You won’t turn him in?”

He chuckles. “Oh, no, this is the most entertainment I’ve had in centuries. I want to be front and center when the halfling binds his lady love. Don’t you?”

His grin is all mischief now, with a healthy dose of madness. I don’t know what to say.

“I’ll be seeing you soon, Maia.”

With that he shoots into the air, still in human form. I look around to see if anyone noticed, but the people on the street never flinch.

Helix is definitely trouble. What have I done?

T
he party
at the student center is about as terrible as I always imagined they’d be. Lots of flashing, seizure-inducing strobes, pounding bass lines, bodies smashed together sweating all over the dance floor. My every muscle is frozen and brittle, ready to shatter at the slightest touch.

The chaos of the crowd batters against my need for order. I want to line everyone up like chess pieces and make them stand still. Better yet, I want to leave and go back to the peace and quiet of my dorm room. But Genna and Caleb are here … and so is Helix.

After Helix left the alley, I walked around the neighborhood for an hour trying to figure out what, if anything, I could do to fix the mess I’d made. Then I spotted him coming out of a natural foods store, still barefoot, with a bag on his arm.

I followed him across the street to the park and sat next to him on a bench. He took in the early evening joggers, the dog walkers and families with strollers, all with a gleam of mischief in his eye.

“What are you planning?” I asked him.

He glanced at me out of the corner of his eye, but didn’t respond. After a few minutes, he pulled a piece of fruit from his shopping bag and started eating. I was startled to see it was a pomegranate. He just ripped it in half with his bare hands, scooped out the insides, and tossed them into his mouth. He finished three of them while I looked on in wonder.

“What is up with the pomegranates?”

“Angels love pomegranates. They’re simply divine.”

I shook my head. “Helix, what are you going to do? You don’t even have shoes on.”

He looked down at his feet and frowned. Then without warning, he stood and left the park. I scrambled after him, following him to a high-end boutique. Watched through the window as he tried on several high-priced outfits picked out by a fawning saleswoman and then walked out of the store without paying. He didn’t seem to have Caleb’s problem with fashion and emerged in slim gray pants, a sweater, and wingtips, all designer, looking like he had stepped straight off a runway.

He didn’t acknowledge me or answer any of the questions I volleyed at him as I trailed him back to campus and then to this party. I lost him in the mass of bodies and the noise and commotion.

So now I wander around the edges of the dance floor, searching for him. There are a few tables here and there, but they’re all occupied by increasingly drunk students. I’m not really sure what to do, what
can
be done against an angel bent on some sort of mischief, but my culpability nags at me, so I force myself to stay. Then I spot Genna across the room, a beam of red light rotating across her face in time with the music. She’s laughing and talking with a guy who is most definitely not Caleb. His back is to me, but his dark hair is curly, his shoulders broad, and I bet icy blue eyes are peering into her right now.

Helix turns as if he feels me watching. His stare stops me in place for a moment. I wonder what the extent of his powers are and what kind of angel he is. Caleb had mentioned something about guilds. Regardless of his actual job, I know his game. He’s a disruptor. I’ve met plenty like him. Always trying to make good things go bad.

In the foster homes, the hospital, the group home, in just about every classroom, there’s always one. Someone so resistant to the status quo they just want to tip the cart to watch the wheels spin in the air.

I push through the crowd and approach the two of them. Genna’s eyes widen in shock when she recognizes me. And is that a trace of guilt? Good. She’s already got the perfect guy who literally climbed out of hell to be with her, and yet she’s here flirting with demon spawn, or angel spawn, or whatever he is.

Helix moves to her side, placing a hand on her waist, his eyes flashing. Genna says something, but it’s lost to the force of the speakers. I think she’s introducing me to him, but I’m busy trying to win this staring contest he and I have going on. He’s not relenting, but I’m not backing down either. And at least he blinks.

“Yeah,” I say to Genna. “We met earlier.”

I break off eye contact. I could have won, but it’s becoming sort of awkward. “Where’s Caleb, anyway?”

Genna’s expression tightens. “He went to find drinks.”

I scan the drinks table, but it’s too crowded to pick him out. “Maybe you should help him.”

“Yes, Genna, go help him,” Helix says, his voice an octave deeper than normal.

Genna looks a little ticked, but walks away without another glance. Helix smirks at me.

“What are you doing?” I seethe and grab his arm to pull him away. He humors me, letting me drag him around, which is even more infuriating.

“I don’t know what you mean.” His smile doesn’t reach his eyes.

“You’re hitting on Genna. You’re trying to sabotage Caleb.”

“If his eternal soul mate is so easily swayed away from him, then perhaps he should rethink his strategy.”

Something about that actually makes sense, but I’m still not having it. “So your motives are strictly altruistic, right?” I shake my head. “You’re not just trying to stir the pot?”

He scans the room over the top of my head and shrugs. “You cannot imagine how dull Euphoria is. At least here things
can
be shaken up. If you’d ever been there, you’d understand how refreshing this is. I don’t know why I don’t visit earth more often.”

“Listen, angel boy, you need to find some other entertainment. Caleb and Genna are off limits.”

His eyebrows shoot up at my demand. “Oh, really?”

“Really.” I poke his chest for emphasis and hurt my finger. It’s like he has a layer of granite under his clothes. The look on his face makes me feel like an ant under a magnifying glass. I can’t really back up anything I’m saying, but I can’t let him win either.

“Please.” I hate asking people for things. I’ve tried to organize my life so I don’t need anyone for anything, and it’s driving me crazy that I want this so badly — for Helix to just let Caleb be.

“And what are you willing to do to ensure my lack of interference with young Caleb and his courtship?”

I take a step back and look up at him. His expression is impassive, but his eyes spark dangerously. “Whatever I can. I want to help him.”

He slides a cool finger down my cheek, all the way down my neck to my shoulder and my arm. Chills and goose bumps rise in response, even when he’s only touching fabric. “What can you do, little Maia?”

“What do you want?” I shrug away from his touch and cross my arms protectively.

With another look behind me, he grabs my hand. “I want to dance.”

The fast electronica track fades right in the middle, and a slow song comes on. Much of the dance floor clears as people couple up and start grinding each another.

Helix pulls me in close. He smells vaguely of the ocean, not unpleasant, but his arms are a steel cage around me. My palms sweat and my movements are stilted and jerky.

“Relax,” he says, moving gracefully to the music. One hand strokes down my back. I try to unlock my stiff joints, but my mind races. What is his endgame? Is my discomfort just more entertainment to him?

“What’s going through that head of yours?” His voice is a low rumble in my ear.

“It really bugs you that you can’t read my mind, doesn’t it?”

Instead of answering, he just pulls me tighter. I’m pressed so close to his hard chest that I have to turn my head to breathe. In this position, it really looks like we’re in an intimate embrace.

“You can really read the mind of everyone here?” That thought is unnerving.

“Yes, but I don’t bother. No one here is thinking anything remotely interesting.”

“Is that something all angels can do?”

“No, each angel has their own distinct powers based on their duties.”

“So, what are your duties? You’re not a Vulture, and you don’t seem to be an Angel of Death.”

He chuckles. “No, though she was amused at your little tirade today.”

I snort. “Yeah, so amused she just flew away instead of, you know, actually answering me.”

“Well, to be fair, you don’t deserve any answers.”

I stiffen inside his embrace. The song changes, and I pull away. “What do you really want, Helix?”

With a hand on my back, he leads me out of the crowd and to the terrace overlooking the Yard. Out here, the moon is huge and bright. The spindly trees shiver, glowing eerily as they shed their leaves for the oncoming winter.

I lean over the balcony, looking off into the distance. Helix takes a few steps away before turning to me, his eyes bright with moonlight.

“Come here,” he says, his voice deeper and more resonant.

“Why?” He’s acting pretty weird, even for him.

He crosses his arms. “Flap your arms and hop on one leg.”

I squint at him and cross my arms, mimicking his movement. “What the fuck are you talking about? Why would I do that?”

The mischievous smile is back. “I can’t
charm
you either. How fascinating.”

“You’re not that charming.” I shrug and turn to lean back on the railing.

“You asked me what I wanted in order to stay away from your precious halfling.”

I nod, pretty sure I’m not going to like where this is headed.

“What I want, dear Maia, is you.”

I swallow and frown. “I don’t understand. You want me to what?”

His gaze is set to smolder. His eyes roam down my body; I’m wearing a lot of clothes so there’s not much to see, but the way he looks at me makes me feel like X-ray vision is one of his powers. I really hope it’s not.

“You want
me
? Like that?” My stomach tightens and my eyes start blinking involuntarily. He just smiles.

“Is that so hard to believe?”

“Actually, yeah.” I motion to myself. “Humans come in all shapes and sizes, and this one isn’t considered particularly appealing by most.”

“Oh, but on the contrary, Maia. All of you is entirely appealing to me. Any of them, I could have with a word.” He sweeps his arms out, pretty much indicating everyone in the world. “But you are different.”

I grip my elbow, pulling my arm tight against my body. His gaze is making me uncomfortable, and not in a warm and lusty way. He’s gorgeous, there’s no doubt about that — an otherworldly beauty ripples over him. His touch doesn’t make me squirm, doesn’t bring back any of the horrible memories that overwhelm me when I get too close to people. But still, I don’t want him. So far I’ve only ever wanted one person, and Helix knows that very well. He saw it in my head. This is just him upsetting my cart.

I take a step back and look him dead in the eye. “So if I fuck you, you’ll leave them alone.”

His mouth turns down at my language. “Yes.”

“And is there some kind of angel pinky swear you can do so I know you mean it?”

“I will vow it. You can ask your halfling about angel vows and he will verify.”

I turn away and shiver, but not from the night air. This body of mine is nothing special. Just flesh and bone, skin and gristle. But it’s not my body he wants. Like he said, those are easy to conquer. He wants something more from me, my free will maybe? He wants me to choose this, but not because he has any feelings about me, just because it amuses him. It would be a transaction. And it could help save Caleb from the Wasteland.

Caleb.

All the things I don’t want to admit about the way I feel, Helix already knows. Maybe doing this will help in more ways than one. Maybe it will distract me from this stupid crush that’s threatening to squeeze me into nothingness.

My eyes sting as tears form behind them. I blink them back and clench my right hand into a fist before turning back to Helix.

“Vow that if I do this, you won’t turn Caleb in to the Vultures and you won’t do anything to interfere with him getting Genna to bind with him.”

“I vow it.” A soft glow surrounds him as he says the words, and I feel the power of them.

“How many times?”

The glow fades away as he frowns at me.

“How many times do I have to sleep with you?”

A grin spreads slowly over his features. “As many as you’d like.”

“So once then?”

He chuckles, throwing his head back like it’s the funniest thing he’s ever heard. “If once is all you’d like, then once it shall be.”

I exhale the breath I’ve been holding. Helix isn’t some angelic pimp wanting to whore me out — at least I hope not.

“So, are we doing this now, or what?”

His damn laugh is really starting to annoy me. “No, not tonight. We will get together tomorrow, and I will take you shopping for some more appropriate attire.”

“What?”

“I cannot be seen with you when you are looking like some sort of Halloween reject. I do have standards.”

I clench my jaw to hold back the stream of insults that want to rush out. “A makeover and a fuck, how did I get so lucky?”

I wonder if they have sarcasm in heaven, because he just smiles wider at me.

“Until tomorrow, then.” He gives a slight bow as his body begins to glow, and then he’s back in his angel form, taking off into the sky like a shooting star, leaving me cold but determined here on the earth.