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Authors: H.L. Mencken

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54
Smith is an expatriate American.

55
S.P.E. Tracts
, No. 1, Preliminary Announcement and List of Members, Oct., 1919, p. 7. The
Literary Supplement
of the London
Times
supported the Society in a leading article on Jan. 8, 1920. “Of old,” it said, “we incorporated foreign words rapidly and altered their spelling ruthlessly. Today we take them in and go on spelling them and pronouncing them in a foreign way.
Rendezvous
is an example,
régime
is another. They have come to stay; the spelling of the first, and at least the pronunciation of the second, should be altered; and a powerful organization of schoolmasters and journalists could secure changes which the working classes are in process of securing with the words (more familiar to them)
garridge
and
shofer.
” See also A Few Practical Suggestions, by Logan Pearsall Smith,
S.P.E. Tracts
, No. III, 1920, especially Sections I, II and III.

56
In later Tracts the Society printed lists of proposed new spellings. In No. XIII (1923) it advocated
rencounter
for
recontre, role
for
rôle, tamber
for
timbre, intransigent
for
intransigeant
, and
malease
for
malaise
.

57
Accents Wild, Dec., 1915, p. 807
ff
.

58
Walt Whitman and the French Language,
American Speech
, May, 1926, p. 423.

59
Why Not Speak Or Own Language?,
Delineator
, Nov., 1917, p. 12. See also his French Words in the English Language,
S.P.E. Tracts
, No. V, 1921.

60
To compensate for this a firm in Hollysburg, N. Y. calls itself
Beaux-Artes
, Inc., thus giving the plural of
art
a complimentary
e
.

61
It is to be found thus in the 1852 edition of Webster’s American Dictionary, edited by his son-in-law, Chauncey A. Goodrich, and in Mark Twain’s Innocents Abroad; New York, 1869, p. 94. But
sauerkraut
is given in the Standard Dictionary (1906), and Webster’s New International (1934).

62
Nomenclature of Diseases and Conditions, prepared by direction of the Surgeon General; Washington, 1916.

63
American Medical Association Style Book; Chicago, 1915. At the 1921 session of the American Medical Association in Boston an English gynecologist read a paper and it was printed in the
Journal
. When he received the proofs he objected to a great many of the spellings,
e.g., gonorrheal
for
gonorrhtœl
, and
fallopian
for
Falloppian
. The
Journal
refused to agree to his English spellings, but when his paper was reprinted separately they were restored.

64
See Words From the French (-
é
, -
é
e), by Matthew Barnes,
S.P.E. Tracts
, No. XXX, 1928.

65
Irish World
, June 26, 1918.

66
The Pluralization of Latin Loan-Words in Present-Day American Speech,
Classical Journal
, Dec., 1919.

67
A correspondent tells me that, in the manuscripts of Jefferson’s letters, even sentences are begun with small letters.

68
This custom is sometimes imitated by American Anglophiles, but it is certainly not general in the United States.

69
Mr. David H. Dodge of San Francisco reminds me that the Western Union used to charge for each of these words as two words. But now it counts only one. It also counts
good-bye
as one, though Webster’s New International gives it a hyphen. In England
good-bye
has a hyphen but
good night
is two words.

70
Many American newspapers and chains of newspapers print style books for the use of their staffs. That of the Scripps-Howard group I have just quoted. Among the most elaborate are The Style Book of the Detroit
News
, edited by A. L. Weeks; Detroit, 1918; Style Book of the New York
Herald Tribune
; New York, 1929; Rules of Composition For the Use of Editors, Copy Readers, Operators and Proof Readers (Chicago
Tribune
); Chicago, 1934; and General Style Book (New York
News
); New York, 1931. Such books are not for sale, though copies usually may be obtained by persons interested. There are discussions of capitalization and abbreviation in virtually all the current desk-books of “good” English. For English usage see Modern English Punctuation, by Reginald Skelton; London, 1933.

IX
THE COMMON SPEECH
I. OUTLINES OF ITS GRAMMAR

The American common speech, of course, is closely related grammatically to the vulgar dialects of the British Isles, and in many ways it is identical with them. In both one encounters the double negative, the use of the adjective as an adverb, the confusion of cases in the pronoun and of tenses in the verb, and various other violations of the polite canon. But these similarities are accompanied by important differences. For one thing, vulgar American is virtually uniform throughout the country, whereas the British dialects differ so greatly that some of them are mutually unintelligible. There are, as we have seen in
Chapter VII
, certain group and regional peculiarities in the United States, but virtually all of them have to do with pronunciation and vocabulary, and are thus of no importance to grammar. A Boston taxicab-driver who moved to San Francisco would find the everyday speech of his fellows, save for a few vowel sounds and a few localisms, very like his own, and he would encounter little more difficulty in communicating with them if he moved to Chicago, New Orleans or Denver. For another thing, vulgar American shows the same tendency to ready change that characterizes the standard language, and is thus given to taking in new forms and abandoning old ones more rapidly than any of the English dialects. I myself remember when the use of the present form of the verb for the preterite, as in
he give
, began to develop into a wholesale adoption of a sort of historical present, as in
he win a dollar, I say to him
, and so on. And various observers have noted the disappearance of forms that were common only a generation or two ago, or their descent to the dialects,
e.g., sot
(for sat),
riz, driv, clomb, see’d
, and
gin
(for given).
1
The English dialects have changed too, as one may
discover by comparing the Cockney of Dickens with the Cockney of today, but they have apparently changed less than vulgar American, and the changes occurring in some of them have affected others hardly at all.

For many years the indefatigable schoolmarm has been trying to put down the American vulgate, but with very little success. At great pains she teaches her pupils the rules of what she conceives to be correct English, but the moment they get beyond reach of her constabulary ear they revert to the looser and more natural speech-habits of home and work-place. They acquire, after a fashion, a reading knowledge of her correct English, and can even make shift to speak it on occasion, or, at all events, something colorably resembling it, but for all ordinary purposes they prefer a tongue that is easier, if less elegant. The schoolmarm’s heroic struggles to dissuade them have got little aid from her professional superiors. They have provided her with a multitude of textbooks, most of them hopelessly pedantic, though others are sensible enough,
2
and they have invented a wealth of teaching methods, mostly far more magical than scientific, but they have not thrown much light upon the psychological problem actually before her. In particular, they have failed to make an adequate investigation of the folk-speech she tries to combat, seeking to uncover its inner nature and account for its vitality. American philologians have printed admirable studies of many of the other languages spoken in the United States, including the most obscure Indian tongues,
3
but incredible as it may seem,
they have yet to produce a grammar of the daily speech of nearly 100,000,000 Americans. It was not until 1908, indeed, that any serious notice of it was taken in academic circles,
4
and not until 1914 that an investigation of it was undertaken on an adequate scale and by an inquirer of adequate equipment. That inquirer was Dr. W. W. Charters, then professor of the theory of teaching at the University of Missouri, and now (1936) director of the Bureau of Educational Research at Ohio State University. One of the problems he found himself engaged upon in 1914 was that of the teaching of the grammar of Standard English in the public elementary schools. In the course of his investigation he encountered the theory that such instruction should be confined to the rules habitually violated — that the one aim of teaching grammar was to correct the speech of the pupils, and that it was useless to harass them with principles which they already observed. Apparently inclining to this somewhat dubious notion, Dr. Charters applied to the School Board of Kansas City for permission to undertake an examination of the language actually used by the children in the elementary schools of that city, and that permission was granted.

The materials he gathered were of two classes. First, the teachers of grades III to VII inclusive in twelve Kansas City public schools were instructed to turn over to Dr. Charters all the written work of their pupils, “ordinarily done in the regular order of school work” during a period of four weeks. Secondly, the teachers of grades II to VII inclusive in all the city schools, together with the principals, were instructed to make note of “all oral errors in grammar made in the school-rooms and around the school-buildings” during the five school-days of one week, by children of any age, and to dispatch these notes to Dr. Charters also. The ages thus covered ran from nine or ten to fourteen or fifteen, and perhaps five-sixths of the material studied came from children above twelve. Its examination
threw a brilliant light upon the speech actually employed by children near the end of their schooling in a typical American city, and
per corollary
, upon the speech employed by their parents and other older associates. If anything, the grammatical and syntactical habits revealed were a bit less loose than those of the authentic
Volks-sprache
, for practically all of the written evidence was gathered under conditions which naturally caused the writers to try to write what they thought to be correct English, and even the oral evidence was conditioned by the admonitory presence of the teacher, by her probably frequent failure to note errors, and by her occasional incapacity to detect them. Moreover, it must be obvious that a child of the lower classes, during the period of its actual contact with pedagogy, probably speaks better English than at any time before or afterward, for it is only then that any positive pressure is exerted upon it to that end. But even so, the departures from standard usage that were unearthed were numerous and striking, and their tendency to accumulate in definite groups appeared to show the working of general laws.
5

The materials accumulated by Dr. Charters were so large that a complete Virchovian autopsy upon them was impracticable, and in consequence he confined his examination to parts of them. He chose (
a
) the oral errors “reported by the teachers of grades III and VII and by the principals”; (
b
) the oral errors made by another group consisting of the children of grades VI and VII; and (
c
) the written errors made by children of the last-named in twelve schools. The children of grade III had had no formal instruction in grammar, but it was in the curricula of grades VI and VII. He classified the oral errors of his (
a
) group as follows:

Error
Illustration
Percentage of the Total Errors
1. Subject of verb not in nominative case.
Us
girls went.
4
2. Predicate nominative not in nominative case.
They were John and
him
. It is
me
.
2
3. Object of verb or preposition not in objective case.
She gave it to Martha and
I
.
1
4. Wrong form of noun or pronoun.
Sheeps; theirself
. The problem
what
is —
2
5. First personal pronoun standing first in a series.
Me
and
him
.
2
6. Failure of the pronoun to agree with its noun in number, person and gender.
Nobody can do what
they
like.
0
7. Confusion of demonstrative adjective and personal pronoun.
Them
things.
3
8. Failure of verb to agree with its subject in number and person.
There
is
six. You
was
.
14
9. Confusion of past and present tenses.
She
give
us four. He
ask
me.
2
10. Confusion of past tense and past participle.
I
seen
, I
have saw
.
24
11. Wrong tense form.
Attackted; had ought
.
5
12. Wrong verb.
Lay
for
lie; ain’t got
; confusion of
can
and
may, shall
and
will
.
12
13. Incorrect use of mood.
If I
was
in your place.
0
14. Incorrect comparison of adjectives.
Joyfulest; beautifuler; more better; worser
.
1
15. Confusion of comparatives and superlatives.
She is the
tallest
(of two).
0
16. Confusion of adjectives and ad-verbs.
He looked up
quick
. That
there
book.
4
17. Misplaced modifier.
He
only
went two miles.
0
18. Double negative.
He
isn’t hardly
old enough.
11
19. Confusion of preposition and conjunction.
He talks
like
he is sick.
0
20. Syntactical redundance.
Mother
she
said so. Where is it
at?
10
21. Wrong part of speech due to similarity of sound.
I would
of
known;
they
for
there
.
1

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