All That Matters (3 page)

“Because I don’t see you out there fucking off a debt. Oh did you guys know that I’m working off someone else’s mess? Yeah I was dumb enough to stay with a family that I thought was doing me a kindness. I came back one day and boom! My shit was out in the street and I wound up staying in a hostel, that I’m still convinced is owned by that one,” I said jerking my thumb in his direction.

“Lieve, you’re excused,” Kerstan said in a stern voice.

“Maybe I don’t want to leave,” I replied, crossing my arms over my chest and leaning back against the chair. “Maybe I think I deserve an answer first.”

You know that expression about playing with fire? Well the look in Kerstan’s eyes told me that I was teetering at the edge of a volcano with molten lava waiting to swallow me whole. But he didn’t lose his temper and he didn’t get up from his seat. Instead he leaned forward and clasped his hands on the table before answering me.

“Just one big one that you’ll never forget.”

What the hell does that mean?

“Of course, you’ll continue to work until that one is ready for you. I can’t have you getting rusty, though I will allow one month’s rest before you are to satisfy the arrangement so that you tighten up,” he finished with a smirk.

I stared at him.
One more with a bunch of little ones in between. Why am I not surprised?
But if that was the case, then I shouldn’t have to “work” anymore until that one was ready for me.

“Can I object to that? I mean, if there’s only one more then why don’t you give me that rest starting today and then I can get it over with,” I said reasonably.

Kerstan laughed as he reached for his glass of blood red wine. He took a hearty drink before setting it down and looking at me with his evil eyes.

“You misunderstand, Lieve. You will not be going out to work until it’s time. You’re now going to be
mine
to use until the final encounter is set,” he replied.

“Y...yours?” I stammered in shock.

A somewhat sinister smile crossed his lips as he took another drink from his wine glass. He held my gaze as he set his glass down and nodded. Then he turned his attention to the rest of the girls in the room, new and seasoned.

“Does this answer your questions, dames? Do not think that what Lieve must do is something you will all endure. What you will do is work off the debts owed to me and then I will let you leave. But let’s not speak of business anymore; instead let us enjoy the feast that I have planned for you all. The food will arrive shortly. Speak amongst yourselves until then,” he said in a faux pleasant tone.

As the girls quietly started speaking amongst themselves, I found the courage inside of me to do something that we were never allowed to do without permission. I got to my feet and I walked down the length of the table with my chair, and sat it down next to Kerstan. I folded my hands in my lap and thought carefully about the words that were going to come out of my mouth. And about the gleaming blade of the sharp knife that sat by the plate at his setting.

“Why are you doing this to me?” I asked quietly. “It seems like this is more of a personal vendetta than a debt.”

“Would you like some wine?” he asked, holding out an empty glass. I watched as one of the older grandmotherly women (who I assumed to have been indebted for quite some time now) came forward and filled the glass with red wine.

He handed me the glass and I set it down, my eyes lingering on the knife for a moment.
If I kill him, I’ll be stuck here forever. I know it,
I thought tearing my eyes away and looking at him.

“I never did much care for blonde hair,” he said absently as he took a hand full of my hair gently in his hand. “Would you mind terribly changing it for me?”

“Kerstan,” I said pulling my hair out of his hand, “Just let me do the final fuck. Please. I want to go home.”

“Reduced to begging, are you? I thought you were stronger than that, Lieve. I thought you had more will than becoming a beggar,” he replied with a smirk. “But to answer your request, my answer is
neen
. This is not something you can bargain your way out of. You will wait until the appropriate moment and in the meantime, you will be my
seksspeeltje
. Understand?”

I blinked back bitter tears. I had no idea what the fuck that meant, but I sure as hell understood the word “neen.” He had yelled it enough times in frustration with some of the girls that used to be here.

“I’m going to my room. I’m getting dressed and I’m going back out to the gardens. I
will
be smoking and actually, I’ll be needing a pack soon. If you want me to be your
seksspeeltje
then I expect some perks. I can tell that there will be no way out of this than to go with the flow. So allow me some small comforts,” I said getting to my feet.

Kerstan cleared his throat and drank the rest of his wine as a small group of elderly women came out with trays of food. I eyed the small feast hungrily as they placed tray after tray down, uncovering it and revealing all of the delicious meats, fruits, and various gravies.

I had to put a hand firmly on my stomach to silence the low grumble that escaped. Here I was trying to be a big bitch and my insides were giving me away.

“I want my name back. I want to be called Amity in this house since I no longer have to go out and fuck for you. Also, I want Betje back. Those are my terms,” I said putting my hands on my hips.

Kerstan finished putting a couple of thick slices of roast pork on his plate, before setting down his fork and knife. He wiped his mouth with his napkin and got to his feet.

Whatever happens, don’t be scared,
I told myself, trying to give him a level stare.

“Come with me,” he said, taking me by the elbow and half dragging me out of the massive dining room.

We had only stepped into the hallway outside the dining room but for some reason I still didn’t trust the situation. If he hit me again, I was going to rip his hands off.

As Kerstan closed the door firmly behind us I looked around the room seeing if there would be anything I could use to protect myself.

“Lieve –”

“
Amity,
” I corrected firmly.

He chuckled and dug his hands into his pockets. “
Amity;
there are some things you must understand. Once I trade a girl I cannot get her back. Betje is out of the question. As for your name, if you wish it, I will address you as Amity in private, but in front of the others, you
are
Lieve. I don’t want them to start to riot over simplicities. Because you are mine for the time being, they will already resent you for not having to out and work. Do we have an agreement?”

Of all the things I wanted back more than my own identity was Betje. It would be the only way I knew she would be safe and sound.
When I get out of this shit hole, I’ll find her.

I stuck my hand out to confirm our agreement. Kerstan gave me a half smile as he took my hand in his and shook it firmly. As I attempted to pull my hand away, he pulled me against him with a sudden jerk.

“When I’m fucking you, what do I call you then?” he whispered into my ear.

I closed my eyes as my body reacted to the softness of his voice and the strength that he used to keep me against him with one hand.
Oh God, how is that I hate him but ... parts of me wants this? Stop reacting! 
I mentally screamed at the “come fuck me” senses that were tingling deep inside of me.

Kerstan finally let me go and gave me an amused look. I knew he could see my nipples standing at attention because I couldn’t exactly hide them. I also couldn’t hide the beginnings of the pool in my panties, so I turned and ran.

Back to my room.

Away from Kerstan.

I locked the door behind me tightly and laid down on my bed. I slid my hand into my panties and immediately began to rub with my clit. The small amount of dominance he had just shown had thrown me into pure fucking mode and I had to cum, STAT. I slid my fingers in and out of myself, rubbing my clit faster as I felt it starting to tense up. When I finally came, his gorgeous face burned into my memory and wondering what someone who owns a place like this was sexually capable of, I felt myself die a little on the inside.

I
didn’t leave the room until the next day. Most of the girls had been sent out on “dates” and I was too embarrassed about having finger fucked myself to thoughts of our “pimp” to even look at any of them.

“Are you okay, Lieve?” a small voice asked once the room was almost empty.

I had been lying on my side staring at the wall. I can’t say that I was ashamed of myself really, I mean like I said before, different circumstances presented, I would’ve fucked him already, but ...
This shit is getting too weird for me.

“Lieve?” the voice asked again.

With a heavy sigh I turned on my side and sat up. Crossing my legs underneath myself I looked at the young woman sitting at the end of my bed. She was looking at me with concerned doe eyes; light brown to be exact. Her blonde hair was pulled back into a tight ponytail and her face was flawless.

“What’s your name?” I asked her.

“The name I was born with was Helenka,” she said quietly. “My new name is Minikin.”

“And where are you from,
Minikin
?” I asked.

“The Czech Republic,” she replied proudly.

“Well
Minikin
, don’t expect to be my friend. Or talk to me again after this conversation is over for that matter. People that I get close to, even just a little close to, tend to disappear,” I said tiredly.

“Why do you keep saying my name like that?” she asked in confusion.

“Because I don’t want you to follow my lead and ask to do by your birth name. Kerstan is not one for games or jokes or anything that seems pleasant or joyful really, and he’ll take that as a sign of rebellion. God knows what’ll happen to you then.”

Before this is over, I’m going to make him tell me what Betje did to him that was so offensive that he sold her. And I want to know to who,
I thought darkly to myself.

She looked at me like I was lying, or maybe like I was full of myself. I wasn’t sure which yet, but it was her ass that would be handed off to someone else; not mine. With a shrug, I reached under the bed and felt around until my hands clasped around the cigarette box holding my last smoke. I shook out the lighter and tossed the empty box onto the bed before lighting my cigarette and inhaling deeply.

This was a clusterfuck and I hated it. In no way shape or form, did I want to be having any desires for Kerstan that weren’t murderous, but the way he ... My body shivered at the memory and I turned my attention back to Minikin.

“How old are you?” I asked her.

“Nineteen.”

Figures. That seems to be the age most of these girls are,
I thought with a scoff.

“I hope you’ve had sex already honey, because you do
not
want your cherry popped by one of those vicious bastards,” I said, flicking the ashes of my cigarette onto the floor.

She turned her face away and sniffled.
Oh fuck. She
is
a virgin. Think of something quick, Amity.

I sighed and brought my knee up, resting my arm on top of it. There had to be a way to save this girl from the horrors of being one of Kerstan’s whores. I glanced around the room trying to brainstorm when her sudden sob distracted me.

“Whatever you do, never let him see you cry,” I warned holding up a finger. “Not that you should have to worry about that. I’m going to get you out of here, but you’re going to have to pull it together for me. Can you do that?”

“Why would you help me?” she asked suddenly.

That’s a good question. Because I can’t help myself? Because I couldn’t help Betje? Because one of us should make it out of here unscathed?

“Let’s just say it’ll be the only good deed that someone will remember me for,” I replied quietly looking out the window. I took another drag of my cigarette, only to find that in my masterminding the break out of Minikin, I had let it burn down to the filter. I looked down on my bed and sighed, sliding the ashes onto the floor. “That was my last one too,” I said with a rueful smile.

“Lieve,
uw aanwezigheid wordt gevraagd
,” one of the grandmothers as I was now calling them said, poking her head into the room.

I glanced at her and nodded. I didn’t understand all of what she said, but I did manage to catch the gist of it. I was being summoned and there was only one person in this house who would want to see me.

“I want you to stay here until I get back, Minikin. If anyone opens that door, you go out that window and down that tree. Go hide in the gardens; I’ll be able to find you there. Okay?” I asked getting to my feet.

She nodded and I gave her a small smile, before turning on my heel and walking out of the room. I closed the door behind me firmly and followed the grandmother toward the far west side of the home. We walked around a corner that was so well hidden, that you’d never know it was there unless you were privileged to the information.

But it was more obvious than being “summoned” that we were on our way to Kerstan’s room. Which meant he wanted to start his sexual adventures with me tonight. Which meant that Minikin was going to be on her own and if she went into the gardens, I probably wouldn’t be able to get to her until tomorrow.
Fuck.

The grandmother led me to a pair of beautiful wooden double doors at the end of the dimly lit hallway and gestured for me to enter. I put one hand on the elaborate gold tone doorknob and bit my lower lip nervously.

My hesitation was not a deterrent to the grandmother who took the decision from me when she put her hand on mine and opened the door, giving me a gentle shove inside.

Kerstan was sitting in a grand leather chair by the window, one leg crossed atop the other, while he held a glass of wine in one hand, still in his exquisite clothing from the Feast of the New Flesh. Of course he didn’t call it that, but I did. I had been through enough new girls here that I just started making names up for certain things. I could see from his gaze that something outside had caught his attention, but I didn’t care enough to allow myself to become curious.