Read All I Can't Resist Online
Authors: Kels Barnholdt
He shoots me a dirty look. “So what do you have against The King?”
“First of all,” I say, “let’s not call him that. And second of all, it’s not that I have anything against him exactly. I just think he’s a little, you know, full of himself. “
Shawn laughs out loud and looks at me like I’m the stupidest girl to ever walk the planet. “Full of himself? He’s the best basketball player in the NBA. He’s actually very modest. He has people hating him who don’t even know him. People just hate him because he is the best. You feel me?”
I pause for a second. What’s he talking about? Do I feel what?
“Well, I don’t think people just hate him to hate him,” I respond. “I mean, even if you’re a Heat fan, I think you can admit he’s kind of cocky at times.”
“First of all,” he says, taking off his hat and throwing it on the bar as if to prove his point, “I’m not a Miami Heat fan. I’m a LeBron James fan.” Yikes, he’s turning kind of red now. Seems like I’ve pissed the superstar off. “Second of all, name one time he’s come off as cocky. I bet you can’t do it.”
Oh please, he’s so full of himself it’s nauseating. No wonder he loves LeBron.
They’re clearly exactly the same. “Um, well how about a few years ago after they didn’t win the championship and LeBron said everyone who doubted him was gonna just go back to their normal lives? Like he was so much better than them because he was LeBron James.”
Shawn scoffs and continues to shoot daggers at me across the bar. “Oh please, that one interview where he got a little bit tense, and it was taken completely and totally out of context. You’re judging him off one interview, that’s ridiculous. Look at how full of himself Kobe is. I don’t hear you criticizing him. You feel me?”
“All I’m saying is that maybe he could take down the whole, I’m the best guy in the world and I know it act. You feel me?”
He knows I’m mocking him now and it seems to light the fire behind his eyes even deeper. “It’s not an act. HE IS A NICE GUY. Don’t you know about all the charity work he does?”
“Oh, how could I miss it?” I laugh. “He only plays a commercial advertising it every twenty mother fucking seconds.”
“It’s not like he wants them to do it. How is he supposed to help the fact that people respect him?”
“Oh, give me a break. Of course he has something to do with it. Lots of celebrities donate to good causes. You don’t see them all over the news, do you? When was the last time you saw Carmelo Anthony’s face up there? And, we all know he does just as much.”
Shawn lets out a loud laugh and it echoes back and forth throughout the whole room. “Figures you like Carmelo. He’ll never win a championship, you know. He’s not a team player. He’s only out for himself. Ball stops as soon as it reaches his hands.”
Shawn’s yelling now and I’m just about to really let him have it when Veronica interrupts.
“Should I step outside or something?”
I tear my eyes away from Shawn’s and focus on her. “What?”
“I feel like I’m in the middle of something.”
I shrug. “I’m fine.”
“I’m fine too,” Shawn nods. “It’s Miss WNBA over here who needs the reality check.”
I fake gratitude. “Aw, you think I look like I could play in the WNBA? You’re so sweet. I mean I don’t want to brag, but I am kind of good. And by “kind of,” you know I mean, I am.”
This is a complete and total lie. I’ve never even picked up a basketball in my life.
But I see no need to give him any more satisfaction than he already has in the situation.
A look of distaste passes over his face and I allow the smile on my own face to grow even wider. He’s about to open up his mouth to speak again when suddenly the kid he was originally walking with is back at his side.
He’s short with a buzz cut, has light blue eyes, and a look on his face like he’s pissed off at the world. He really knows how to pick the people he hangs out with, this Shawn.
“This place is whack,” his friends tells him like it’s the most obvious statement in the world. “Let’s finish our pitcher and leave.”
Shawn’s eyes are still on me, but he answers anyway, “Couldn’t agree more.”
He swings his body around on the stool and takes off after his boy. But not before shooting me one more nasty look over his shoulder.
Veronica watches him walk away and then sighs. “He is so…”
I wait for her to finish the sentence. Annoying? Full of himself? Horrible? The worst ever? The possibilities are endless.
“Sexy,” she finally settles on.
I sigh and place my head in my hands on the bar. “He is the complete and total opposite of sexy. Trust me.”
“Oh no,” she says still looking after him. “He’s sexy all right. You just don’t want to admit it yet.”
Then she throws back her head and downs the drink that’s in front of her, setting the pace for the rest of the night.
Chapter Two
“The whole situation is completely and totally annoying, but it’s not like I can do anything about it. You know how it is when you try to tell teachers anything. They think you’re just trying to correct them in front of the whole class, even when you’re nice about it.”
I roll my eyes, throw my huge blanket back over my head, and curl up into a little ball on my bed. It’s the next morning and I’m on the phone with my sister Kate. She’s going on some rampage about some English professor at her school. She’s convinced that he’s interpreting some poem the wrong way.
Now, a normal person might take this situation a little more seriously, but Kate’s my sister, which means I’ve seen this situation over and over again throughout the years.
Ever since middle school Kate has been convinced that a teacher was teaching something the wrong way, or explaining something the wrong way. One time she even corrected her Math teacher for adding up a problem wrong.
At first she would let them know right in class that they were teaching things the wrong way. And when that started to annoy them she began to correct them in private, after class. And again, when that proved to be annoying to them as well, she stopped trying to correct them all together. Instead, she would come home all aggressive and depressed and sit and vent to our family about how if the teachers didn’t know what they were doing how were our children supposed to develop and change the world? And besides, didn’t they know she was just trying to help? So they wouldn’t make the same mistakes over and over again?
It was enough to drive all of us insane after a while.
“That sounds awful,” I tell her, keeping my voice low so not to wake up Veronica who’s sleeping next to me.
Kate sighs loudly on the other side of the phone. “It is, it is awful. But what can I do? I mean, how can we progress as a nation if our educational leaders don’t even know what they’re doing?”
“I don’t know,” I tell her, which is true. I don’t.
“You don’t know because we can’t! That’s why!”
Yikes, she’s really getting going now.
“I’m sure you’ll figure it out Kate. You always do. I mean, you know sometimes people are threatened by how smart you are, and they just try to not take you seriously.
Probably jealous, if you ask me.” It’s my rehearsed answer, and I know it’s what she wants to hear.
I hear her voice immediately start to soften. “I know. I thought it would be different in college, but I guess it’s going to follow me wherever I go. But anyway, how are you?”
Oh thank God, I thought we would never get off that topic. Sometimes theses discussions can last well over an hour. I remind myself to thank the Lord some more for small victories later.
“Oh, I’m good, I’m good,” I say trying to sound casual. “So, um…remember that kid you were talking to from the basketball team? Mike, I think his name was?”
“WHO?” Kate says loudly like she can barely hear me.
I grind my teeth tightly together. “You know that kid Mike who you used to date senior year? From the basketball team?”
Kate pauses for a minute. “You haven’t been going to any college parties have you Chels?”
Her voice sounds suspicious and I immediately wish I hadn’t said anything. Kate has a way of being able to read me like a book. This could also be because I’m an awful liar.
“No,” I tell her sternly.
The best way to get through to Kate is to be short and direct. She’s read tons of books on psychology and other profound things, so I know better than to try to explain too much. That would look even more suspicious to her.
“I just saw him at the mall yesterday,” I add casually. Lie.
“Oh,” she sounds bored suddenly. “I wouldn’t call it dating exactly. He wasn’t very smart, if you know what I mean. I think it lasted like a month, tops.”
“Oh, right.” I peer out of my covers to make sure Veronica is still sleeping soundly next to me. She snores quietly as if to give me confirmation. I lower my voice even more just to be safe.
“He was with his friend he brought over to our house that day. You know, the famous basketball player or whatever.” Another lie.
Kate laughs. “Shawn Morrison? He still hangs out with that jackass? Ugh, nothing worse than a guy who has it all and knows it.”
Morrison. I knew I had heard his last name on the news before. He was all most of the state could talk about. It wasn’t everyday they bred someone to be famous, I guess.
“I guess so. They were with a few girls. Probably their girlfriends.” Lie, lie, lie.
“I doubt it. Maybe Mike, but not Shawn. Shawn doesn’t do girlfriends. He just does sex. Besides, I hear he’s kind of crazy.”
I perk up, curious in spite of myself. “What do you mean crazy?”
Kate sounds like she’s walking through the quad or something now. I can hear tons of people and loud noises in the background.
“Just crazy. Total bad guy. Total bad news. Always getting in fights and stuff.
Him and his friends think they can do whatever they want in this town just because Shawn’s about to be famous.”
I want to ask her more, like what exactly he’s always getting away with, but suddenly my ear is filled with a bunch of static. And when I look down at the screen it reads, “call lost.” Ugh, well that’s annoying.
I watch as the phone fades to black, then lean back into my pillow and take a breath. I turn slowly and look at Veronica, whose eyes are wide open, looking straight back into mine. Oh no.
“Caught you,” she declares.
I immediately sit up and jump out of bed. I walk over to my closet and swing open the doors to walk inside.
“Caught me doing what?” I ask, pretending I have no idea what she’s talking about even though I, of course, know exactly what she’s talking about.
“Asking about Shawn,” she calls loudly from my bed. “I told you it was only a matter of time before you realized how sexy he was.”
I yank a sweatshirt off the pile of clothes folded neatly on one of the shelves in my closet. It’s a light green color and has the words New York City written in bright red letters across the front. Fun!
“I was only asking because of how annoying he was. And because I want to make sure I never see him again.” I pull the fabric over my head and stick my hands in the pocket. Perfect. Nice and comfortable.
“Nice try!”
I can hear her getting up from my bed now. I walk out of my closet and come face to face with her. Her look turns to one of disgust when she sees what I’m wearing.
“Ugh, that sweat shirt is horrible, just horrible,” she tells me.
I look down at it. What does she mean horrible? This is super cute!
“But anyway,” she says, making her way over to the side of the bed and slipping the heels she wore last night onto her feet, “I don’t think there’s anything wrong with having a little crush. I mean, it’s about time some boy caught your attention. I was beginning to worry that something was maybe wrong or something.”
“Hey!” I say shooting her a nasty look. “What do you mean wrong? What could be wrong?”
I’m not sure if this is a bad thing or not, but it sounds like maybe she was beginning to worry about me in a bad way or something. I was interested in boys, it was just hard to find anyone our age who was mature, that’s all. No need to settle!
She ignores my question and grabs her coat off the back of my desk chair. “All I’m saying is that this could be good for you. Give you something to think about besides school!”
“I think about a lot of things besides school!” I declare.
She laughs like I just told her a joke, and then picks her purse up off the ground.
“I better go before my mom starts blowing up my phone. I’ll call you later.” She kisses my cheek quickly, then heads out the door.
“I don’t have a crush on anyone!” I call after her in one last desperate attempt to convince her. If she hears me she doesn’t answer.
I’m not sure if I said it to reassure her or myself. Because the truth is, the real truth is, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about him since he walked away from me last night.
* * *
“So I told her,” my mom says, pouring a ridiculous amount of syrup over the pancakes she just set down in front of me, “that she should just stop worrying about what the teacher is teaching, the other students, and just worry about her own education.”
It’s about an hour later and I’m sitting in the dinning room with my mom and dad, eating breakfast. Apparently Kate has been on the phone all morning with not only me, but my mother and father as well.
My dad peers at me over the top of his newspaper and raises his eyebrows as if to say, “How many times are we going to spend breakfast talking about Kate and her problems with the education system?” My dad completely and totally gets my sense of humor about it. My mom, on the other hand, thinks that everything Kate does is as important as anything that’s in the newspaper my father is reading.
“Yeah,” I say, taking a huge bite out of my pancakes. “I told her the same thing.”
A little piece of pancake flies out of my mouth and back down on my plate as I talk. My mom looks at me with a sense of disappointment on her face.
“Chelsea, please don’t talk with food in your mouth,” she says, frowning.
I swallow. “Sorry.”
“How did studying with Veronica go last night?”