All Grown Up (28 page)

"He needs a mother
, Leo, not necessarily
her,
" my mother added.

"Elaine
, we talked about this…" My father leaned forward and patted her knee.

"I’m just saying
." She put her hands up in surrender.

I sighed.

"I didn’t think that Chloe would offer up what she did. It was surprising."

I heard the front door close and looked up to see Mina enter the room.

"What are you…?" I turned to my parents "What is
she
doing here?" I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Leo, please…I am so sorry. I was never sure…" I cut Mina’s pleading off.

"Oh, so you just suspected and didn’t bother to mention any of it to me?" I yelled.

"Please, I never meant for this to happen. I know that I was wrong
. I just…I was so confused about everything and then I wasn’t sure. I didn’t want to cause a situation without being absolutely sure, and then Mom approached me at the funeral and I knew that I…"

"WHAT?" I turned to my mother. "You knew at the funeral?"

My mother stood quickly and walked over to me.

"Leo
, I didn’t know for sure. When I saw you and Anthony in such close proximity, I just felt sure that he was your son. The features were just too strong in resemblance and…"

"HOLD UP," I put my hands up in the air and took a deep breath. "You knew at the funeral and you didn’t bother to say a fucking thing to me?"

"Don’t talk to your mother like that, Leo." Now my father was standing next to my mom.

My mother’s face was
full of shock and sadness.

"Honey, I didn’t want to make a scene at the funeral…"

"And what about the rest of the month, mother? You had plenty of time to mention this, don’t you think?" I sat down, roughly, onto the couch with my head in my hands. "I can’t believe this family." I stood up quickly and headed for the door.

"Where are you going?"
My mother cried, following me to the door.

"I need to get out of here.  I need to just…be alone!" I shouted over my shoulder and slipped into my car. I threw it in reverse and then squealed my tires when I slammed the car into drive and took off.

Almost reaching the beach, I saw red and blue lights behind me. "Fuck!" I pulled over. When I looked out my window, Kenneth Fisher was standing there.

"Hey
, Kenneth," I mumbled as I rolled my window down. "What are you doing in the cruiser?" I grumbled.

"Hey
, Leo, just helping out Chief Murray for the day," he mumbled back. "Everything okay?"

I nodded my head.

"Okay, can you slow down a little so you don’t kill yourself? My grandson needs his father, you know." My head snapped up. He patted my shoulder before walking back toward his car.

"Kenneth," I jumped out of my car.

He turned around and raised his eyebrow.

"Did you know?" I leaned against my car and Kenneth walked back
, leaning next to me.

"Well, I didn’t ‘know’
, per se. But, when Tony was about a year and a half, he smiled at me with this grin. I knew then that there was only one other boy in my life that had that hair and that grin." He nudged me with his elbow, then he sighed.

"I know that you are mad at, well, at everyone and
, to be honest, you have every right to be. I just hope that you don’t let that anger eat you up and ruin the rest of what you will have with your son and your family." He patted me on the back this time and headed back to his car. "Oh, and don’t forget to slow down," he chuckled as he climbed into the cruiser.

I spent an hour at the beach thinking about everything, mostly focus
ing on what Kenneth had said to me. Then, out of nowhere, I remembered the night of the beach fire where I had seen Chloe grown for the first time. She was dancing with Mina and Roni, smiling so large, looking so freaking amazing. She was so perfect. Once the sun had sunk into the water, I drove back to my parents.

Once again, my mother was at the open door before I got out of the car. She looked nervous enough to jump out of her skin at any
moment.

"Calm down
, Mom. I love you." She smiled and hugged me.

"I am so sorry
, baby. I really should’ve told you. I didn’t even…oh, I have no excuse." Then she sighed. "I guess we have all made our mistakes…" she let her thought drift off without finishing it.

"Yes, we have, including me." She looked at me confused. "Trust me, I have made my mistakes." She still didn’t understand. I took a deep breath
.

"Let’s just say
, that if I hadn’t been an absolute tool years ago, then I would probably have about four kids with Chloe right now." That thought alone made my heart rip even further apart.

"Honey
, you can’t…" Mina cut her off.

"Will you stop babying him
?" She turned to me. "Leo, I know I was wrong and I am truly sorry. I also realize that you can’t forgive me and I will not ask you to. Just know, you have made your mistakes, too, and I have never turned on you. This wasn’t about me choosing sides. This was simply me being confused. I am, and always will be, sorry. I hope that everything works out well for you and Tony." With that, Mina walked out of the door and closed it behind her.

Kenneth’s words came back to me, ‘
I just hope that you don’t let that anger eat you up and ruin the rest of what you will have with him and your family.’
I pulled away from my mother and ran out the door.

"Mina
!" She turned around, shocked to see me coming after her.

"I don’t want to fight
, Leo-" I cut her off.

"Neither do
I." She looked even more shocked. "I realize that you didn’t intend for this to happen and, though I do not agree nor am I happy about what happened, I don’t want us to go on like this. You are my baby sister and I just can’t let you walk out because I am angry about a mistake that was made."

She ran and jumped into my arms, almost knocking me over.

"Oh, Leo," she cried. "I am really, truly sorry. I love you so much and I would never want…"

"Will you shut up
?" I laughed and she smacked my chest. We walked back into the house together and had dinner with my parents.

Our
lawyers had been contacting each other and set up a meeting where we could discuss the custody arrangement. We were going to work up to the overnight and lengthy stays after two months of allowing Tony to get familiar with me.

I pulled up to Chloe’s home and took a deep breath before I went to her front door. A plump
, older woman answered the door and showed me through the house. The house was ridiculously large and didn’t feel like Chloe at all. It was then that I noticed all the brown boxes with a moving company’s name on them. She was moving.

"They are out back
, sir," the older woman stated as she walked me through a large kitchen to a set of French doors.

"Thank you," I said as I turned to head out the doors. I stopped where I was
standing, Tony was running around as Chloe chased him. He hurried up the ladder of large swing set and Chloe went up after him, both of them coming down the slide together.

Her hair was down and flowing around her from her movements and a slight breeze. The smile instantly made me think back to that first night on the beach at the fire. Her eyes shone
with such love as she looked down at her, my,
our
son. I felt my heart swell at the vision of my son wrapped up in her arms as they laughed and giggled.

I walked out onto the back porch and Chloe’s whole demeanor changed once she saw me. I wanted her to go back to the minutes before I stepped out. It was that spirit in her that had always seemed to dr
aw me to her. Like a moth to a flame.

"Leo
." She nodded and swallowed hard. I nodded back. She knelt down to Tony, "Remember what we talked about, baby?" Tony stared at her blankly. She sighed. "Can you say hello?"

He turned his little head to me. It was like looking into my own eyes. It was so surreal and scary at the same time. I was instantly in love with this little person in front of me. I had been from the
moment I looked upon him. Before I even knew he was mine I felt it, the same way that I had felt it with Chloe. I shook off that thought.

"Hi," his little voice said as he giggled.

"Hi, Tony," I smiled. "I’m Leo," I stuck out my hand.

He gave me a strange look and crumpled up his face.

"Daddy," he said and I stared at him in shock. He slapped my hand, like he was giving me five. I looked to Chloe who smiled a little at me and then she stood up and headed to the porch. I picked Tony up and hugged him tightly, planting kisses on his head.

"Ew…" he giggled. Chloe sat down in a chair and smiled at Tony’s reaction.

"How did he…" She cut me off.

"I’ve been telling him," she said.

"But…"

"I have a photo of you
, Leo. I’ve been showing it to him and telling him that you were his daddy." She half smiled at me and then picked up a book from the table next to her.

"Thank you."

She simply nodded to me and looked back to her book.

Tony and I played for a couple of hours in the back yard before Chloe said that it was time for him to eat lunch. He ran to her and climbed up her body until she lifted him into her arms and walked him into the house.

Chloe discussed his new diet and his medications with me as Anthony ate. She knew that we would have to go over it again, but she figured that the more times I heard it, the better I would remember. I had to admit that she was being much more civil than I thought she would be today. After he was done eating, I saw him yawn and Chloe quickly washed him off. She looked up to me.

"Its nap time, did you want to…" I cut her off.

"Of course," I started to grab my things to go.

"Um
…what are you doing?"

"Leaving so he can go…"

"I meant, did you want to put him down for his nap?" She fought a small grin that was playing on her lips.

"Oh, um
…yeah, sure. What does he normally do?" I answered, completely embarrassed about the misunderstanding.

Chloe helped me with his typical routine and then we left him to settle into sleep.

"He is pretty good with napping," she said without looking at me as we went back downstairs. "Once he’s in there, he usually doesn’t get up until he’s slept. He’s very good."

"I can tell," I stated. "You have done a great job with him
, Chloe." She stopped suddenly and looked at me like she was waiting for me to say I was joking. I wasn’t. I was very serious. I saw moisture start to build in her eyes, but she turned away quietly and walked back toward the kitchen.

There was a large TV room next to the kitchen that Chloe led me to.

"Should I go and come back tomorrow?"

"Wait," she said quickly. "I wanted to give these to you, to look at. I’m getting copies made for you." She furrowed her brow as she held out four large books.

I took them.

"What are…?"

I started to ask as I opened the first one. Once I saw the ultrasound picture, I knew what these were. I sat on the couch I was next to and couldn’t stop looking at it. That was my son. I looked up and saw that Chloe was over in the kitchen, she seemed to be making coffee. I looked back down at the four different ultrasound pictures. That was my son inside of my Chloe. I felt the tears form and then fall as I thought about missing this.

As I turned the page
, there was a picture of a very pregnant Chloe, Roni holding her arms behind her back as Mina was holding up her shirt and drawing a face on her belly. I couldn’t hold in the chuckle.

"What?"
She asked.

I held up the page. She blushed and bit her lip.
Ahh..the lip! Damn it still gets me.

"Sorry," she said as she placed a tray with coffee, cups, sugar
and cream.

"For what?"
I asked curiously.

"I forgot that picture was in there. It won’t be in the copy that I
’m having…"

"I want it," I blurted out as I turned the pages. Keeping my face down toward the pictures of the baby shower and then of Anthony in the hospital right after he was born. The tears really streamed now.

"Leo, I am so sorry." She stood up and left the room. I watched her walk out but I said nothing.

She left me alone as I finished looking through the albums; his birthdays, holidays, e
verything. Once I was finished, I laid the books on the coffee table in front of me and poured some coffee. I stood and walked around the large room as I sipped at my cup. I stopped when I saw a small row of DVD’s with white labels. They were labeled Anthony Charles Fiorello with dates written on them. I grabbed the first one. It was labeled twenty-eight weeks to nine months old. I clenched it to my chest and slipped it into my jacket before Chloe realized that I had taken it.