Again (Time for Love Book 3) (19 page)

“If you really love her, Connor, why didn’t you tell her about all this? Why weren’t you fully honest with her?” Ash asked, his voice softer.

“She already knows about the stupid title. And I already told her I'd slept with her because I wanted to, not to keep being Mr. Fuck King. I thought it was all settled and Lucas had let go of the challenge. It just never occurred to me that Lucas is still so stuck with this,” he explained.

“You have to admit it sounds bad,” Ash said. “Frankly, with your reputation, people would rather believe what’s apparent than what's true. And what’s apparent here is that you were a player having a game with one of your player friends.”

“Did you talk to Lucas?”

“He was with us at dinner tonight.”

“What?!”

“Apparently, he thought you were cheating. You were supposed to tell Amanda about the challenge, but you didn’t. He thinks you picked her so you would win, knowing she wasn’t likely to sleep around.”

Connor blanched. “He told you that? Was Amanda there when he said that?”

“He told Amanda that, and Amanda told me when I caught her in tears in the kitchen.”

“Oh God.” Connor slumped on a chair, burying his face in his hands. His chest throbbed in pain and he felt so hopeless. He had no proof to show that his intentions with Amanda that night were because he couldn’t stay away from her, and not because he wanted to win some challenge. All events did point to him being a cad. Yet it wasn’t the case at all. But all he had to disprove it were his words.

Would Amanda choose to believe him again? Or had she had enough?

His phone rang and he snatched it, hoping it was Amanda. But it was Lucas.

“Hello,” he answered coldly.

“Hey, Connor,” Lucas said, sounding concerned. “I’m in Sydney.”

“I know.”

“Has Amanda told you?”

“No. She probably hates me like she’s never hated anyone in her life,” he said flatly.

“Hey, I’m sorry. She did get quite upset. I didn’t mean to hurt her. I was just explaining about our arrangement—”

“For fuck’s sake, Lucas, can’t you let it go?” he asked angrily. “I told you you could have that stupid title. Stop with the competition already. I don’t want to be part of your stupid games!”

“All right, all right,” Lucas replied, trying to placate. “Again, I’m sorry. So I take it something’s going on between you and Amanda?”

“Yes. At least something
was
going on. Apparently, she never wants to see me again.”

“Sorry, Connor. Really. If Amanda doesn’t want to talk to you again—”

Connor hung up the phone, not letting Lucas finish, but his last words echoing in his head.
‘If Amanda doesn’t want to talk to you again...’

“Ash,” Amanda’s voice said.

Connor’s head whipped towards the door. Amanda was here. She was home.

“Baby,” he said with relief, getting up and hurrying to her.

But Amanda ignored him. She headed straight for Ash. “What are you doing here?” she asked her brother.

“Well, I thought I’d talk to him,” Ash replied.

Amanda glanced at Connor and her eyes widened in horror. “Did you hit him?” she asked Ash.

Ash shrugged.

“I didn’t mind,” Connor said, stepping closer. But Amanda still didn’t acknowledge him. Instead, she took Ash’s right hand and inspected it.

“It’s okay,” Ash said. “I didn’t break my fingers or anything.”

Amanda shook her head. “Since when did you get so violent?”

Ash just shrugged again.

Connor stared at Amanda, willing for her to look at him again. Her walls were back up. He felt them acutely. “Amanda,” he said softly.

Finally, she turned to him. “I knew Ash was bound to do something silly. So when I got your message that he was here, I thought I’d come and pick him up.”

“Amanda,” he said pleadingly, the hope and excitement from a minute ago fast vanishing into thin air, replaced by alarm. Amanda’s face and voice were devoid of emotions.

“I don’t want to talk, Connor,” she said, pulling Ash with her toward the exit.

“You know I love you. You
know
that,” he said insistently.

Amanda shook her head. “There are just too many lies, Connor,” she said flatly. “You hide too many things from me. How do you expect me to trust you?”

“But I’ve already told you everything. How was I supposed to know Lucas’ perspective on the challenge?”

“You didn’t tell me about the challenge,” Amanda said.

“But when I said Lucas loved competing against me, that’s what I meant. It didn’t occur to me to tell you all the details. It just didn’t come up.”

“I don't want to talk about this anymore, Connor. I just don't.”

Connor exhaled gustily. Amanda had needed some time apart from him before. And they were able to sort things out eventually. But something was different about her this time. She was just... cold. Too cold.

“Amanda...” he croaked.

"It's over," she said, then walked out without a backward glance.

Tears fell from his eyes, his heart shattering to pieces.

A
manda hugged herself as she rode the lift with Ash. It was taking all her effort not to cry. But if she started now, she was afraid she might not be able to stop.

“You’re hiding again,” Ash murmured.

She glanced at him, but remained silent.

“When you put on this emotionless exterior, I know you’re hurting like hell inside.”

That did it. Ash’s words pricked her safety bubble, and tears silently streamed down her face.

They exited at the ground floor and Ash halted her, making her face him. “You love him?”

Amanda looked down the floor, answering him with a sob.

Ash put his arms around her and stroked her hair as she cried on his shoulder.

“I just don’t know if I should believe him or not, Ash,” she blubbered.

“I was very mad at him, too. But from what I’ve seen, I think he’s telling you the truth.”

“What truth?” she asked, looking up at him.

“That he loves you,” Ash said softly.

Hope flared within her. “You think?”

“Yeah. I know all this drama involving Lucas makes him look bad. But when I teased him about his Fuck King title weeks ago when I first heard about it, he seemed to genuinely hate it. I think he’s being honest when he says it’s Lucas who couldn’t let go of this competition thing, not him.”

Amanda stared at Ash, worrying her bottom lip. “You honestly don’t think he slept with me that night in Melbourne only so he could win the challenge? ‘Cause it makes sense, you know.”

“What makes sense?”

“That...” She sniffed. “That he only noticed me that night because he was looking for someone who’d help him get the upper hand over Lucas.”

“Oh, Amanda. What about after that? He said you guys have been going out for a few weeks now, which I didn’t know about. Do you think he keeps on asking you out because he’s still playing Lucas’ game? And you have keys to his place! Which tells me this must be more serious than you guys let on. How come you never told me about the two of you before? You know Connor’s my friend, too.”

“We wanted to tell you in person—when both of us are available—because we thought you might overreact. Which you did. You hit him!” she said with a frown.

“I didn’t know the whole story then. I hit him before I realised how he really feels about you.”

“Why am I such a scaredy-cat when it comes to love, Ash?”

Ash smiled at her affectionately. “Because you’ve been hurt a few times before. It’s a normal reaction. But you don’t want the past to keep you from your future happiness.”

Amanda sighed. Was it really about Connor not being trustworthy, or was it about her simply being afraid to trust? Memories of Connor proving his love with words and actions flooded her mind, and she knew what she had to do.

“I better go back upstairs,” she said, smiling. “I think I overreacted, too. ”

Ash nodded. “If you need me, call.”

“Thank you, Ash,” she said, hugging him.

“Anytime. Tell Connor that if he hurts you again, I’ll give him another one.”

Amanda chuckled. “You know, if Connor and I work out, could you ease off being such an overprotective brother? Connor’s kind of overprotective too. I don’t need the two of you competing for the title of
Amanda’s Overprotector of the Year
.”

Ash laughed. “We’ll see.”

*****

A
manda took a deep breath before inserting the key and turning the knob. Connor’s door opened silently and she walked in. Her heart stopped when she saw Connor splayed on his couch, his arm over his eyes.

“Connor?”

Connor jerked to a sitting position. He stared at her as if he couldn’t believe she was standing there.

She gaped back at him, dumbstruck by his countenance.

Connor had been crying. His eyes were red, his expression disconsolate. If she still had any doubts about Connor's feelings, the naked emotion in his face would have obliterated them.

His gaze went to her hand, which was holding his keys. “Did you come back to return those?” he asked in a strangled voice, his pain evident. “Well, I'm not taking them back.”

Connor's words brought Amanda out of her stupefied state. “No,” she said, putting the keys back to her purse.

She sat down next to him and put her palm on his face. “Connor,” she said softly, her own tears falling down her face.

Connor’s eyes filled again. “Amanda, I don’t have any other way to prove to you that I never intended to complete Lucas’ challenge. I don’t know how else to make you believe that his game had absolutely nothing to do with my decision and desire to sleep with you that first time. All I can do is say I love you over and over again. I love you, Amanda. I love you. I love you. I love you—”

Amanda lunged at him, kissing him urgently on the lips.

Connor groaned, crushing her to him. “Baby, I love you,” he said again. And he continued to say it while he planted heated kisses all over her face.

She cupped his face to look into his eyes. “I’m sorry I got scared again,” she whispered.

Connor caressed her cheeks with his thumbs. “As long as you keep coming back to me.”

She smiled. “Is there anything else I need to know?” she asked softly, combing his hair with her fingers. “About Melbourne, about any other challenge or bet, about your previous flings or girlfriends? I’d just hate to overreact again.”

Connor leaned back on the couch, deep in thought. “Well, apart from my plan to talk to Lucas so we could put this matter to bed, I can’t think of anything at this point,” he said after a long pause. “That’s not to say there will be nothing that could come up later that you might dislike about me. What’s more, I’m sure I’m bound to do things that would annoy you—like spend too much time in the garage instead of cuddling in front of the TV with you.”

She climbed on his lap and wrapped her arms around him. “As long as you love me, Connor. And as long as we both communicate better next time.”

“Do you really believe that now? That I love you?” he asked anxiously.

“Yes,” she answered, burying her face in his neck. “If I’m honest with myself, it was more that I didn’t believe that you could want
me
.”

Connor pried her head loose so he could look at her. “What are you talking about? I can’t believe you’d still want
me
after all that drama.”

“Well, I do,” she said.

Connor sighed, his gaze serious. “I’ve searched for you for so long, Amanda. Now that I’ve found you, I never want to let go.”

Their lips met again, and soon their bodies blazed with their passion, fuelled by their love.

*****

A
manda got off the bus, grateful she was able to leave work half an hour early today. But instead of heading home, she made her way straight to Connor’s shop. She wanted to catch him before he did something he might regret afterwards.

The phone call she got from Lori during lunch time made her nervous. Apparently, Lucas had issued another challenge to Connor that involved Amanda. And it was taking place at five thirty—several minutes from now. Lori had said the prize was something very precious to both Lucas and Connor. Unfortunately, that was all Lori knew.

She got there just as a Porsche was driving out, the man behind the wheel smiling. Another happy customer, she guessed.

The receptionist was on the phone when she walked into the building. They waved to each other, and she proceeded to Connor’s office.

He was fiddling through a filing cabinet, his back to her. When he whirled around, he spotted her standing by the threshold.

“Hey, honey!” he said, his face lighting up with obvious glee. He walked up to her and gathered her in his arms, then gave her a thorough kiss.

Mmm. Would it always be this blissful when being kissed by this man?

“You’re back from work early,” Connor said.

“Yes. I heard Lucas had issued you another challenge,” she said, caressing his nape with her fingers. “And you’ve accepted.”

Connor raised an eyebrow. “Gee, news reaches you fast. Who told you that?”

“Lori. What is it about, Connor? Apparently it involves me.”

Connor sighed. “I was going to tell you tonight.”

“But the event would already have happened, wouldn’t it?” she asked, trying not to sound too whiny.

Connor tightened his arms around her. “It was going to be a surprise.”

“A surprise?”

“Uh-huh.”

“For me?”

“Yup.”

“Why?”

“Because I want you to know how much I love you.”

She smiled, pressing herself against him and not caring if there were still staff around. “But I already know how much you love me. A lot.”

Connor grinned. “That’s good.”

“So why do you have to continue pandering to Lucas’ childish games?”

“Because he issued me a challenge I simply couldn’t refuse. Lucas thinks I won’t go through with it. He’s wrong.”

“What’s it about?”

“We spoke in depth this morning. He still can't believe I intended to deliberately lose the Melbourne challenge. I said to him that my only proof concerning that is the fact we’re together, that we’re in love.”