Again and Again (7 page)

Monnique came to our group. “Whoa…I can tell something bad just happened.”

Ryan ignored her. I wasn’t sure why he was being such an ass. I appreciated his loyalty to me, but he didn’t need to be rude to Monnique.

“Scarlet and Sean still aren’t talking,” Janice said.

“I’ve
never met a couple more in love, but who fought as much as you do,” she said as she looked at Scarlet.

“Well, he could just apologize,”
Scarlet said.

Sean kept his silence.

Mike looked her up and down. “You look nice.”

‘Thanks,” she said. “So does your girlfriend.”

“Well, duh,” Mike said. “She makes everyone look like shit.”

“Thanks,” Scarlet said.

Mike shrugged. “It’s true.”

Cassandra’s cheeks tinted but she didn’t comment.

Diane and Andrew approached our huddle. She embraced Sean. “Everything looks so wonderful. You’re having a good time, aren’t you?”

Sean finally stopped looking at Scarlet. “It’s lovely. You did a great job.”

She clapped her hands. “You’re all having a blast?”

“Yes,” everyone lied.

“Great.”

She totally ignored Scarlet. It was like she didn’t exist. I could see the pain in Scarlet’s eyes.

Andrew came to her then hugged her. “You look like a million bucks.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

“Only you could make a baby bump look good.”

She blushed. “Thanks.”

“Let’s dance,” he said. He pulled her to the floor.

Diane clung to Sean like he was a child. “Dance with me, baby. You never dance with me.”

“Mom,” he growled. “I’m still pissed at you. You’re lucky I’m putting on a show.”

She glared at him. “Dance with me or I’ll slap you.”

He held his tongue and took her hand, walking to the dance floor.

Since Monnique was still in our group, Ryan walked off without another word.

“Wow,” Monnique said. “He hates me.”

Janice rolled her eyes. “Don’t mind him. He’s a fucking jackass. I’ll talk to him.” She went after him.

Now it was just the three of us. And to say it was awkward was an understatement.

Hazel stepped away. “Umm…I have to pee.”

I didn’t walk away and neither did Monnique. I tried not to stare at her but it was hard. She looked so gorgeous. I was certain she did it on purpose, just to torture me. I kept thinking about kissing her and holding her. I wanted to take her back to my place and make love to her right now. I wanted to forgive her and move on. But I couldn’t. And that just made it unbearable.

She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “How was your week?”

“It was good,” I said quietly. “Just work, mainly.”

“I heard Hazel is quite a dancer.”

“She is,” I said. “She does Ballet.”

“Beautiful.”

Talking to her was so easy. I missed it. I was glad she wasn’t jealous about Hazel. When I said nothing was happening between us, she believed me. And that was a nice change. I just wish she felt the same way about Scarlet three months ago. At least she changed.

“You watch her a lot?”

“Usually on the weekends,” I said.

She nodded. “Cool.”

I tried to think of something to say. We hadn’t talked about our relationship. “How’s your new job?”

“I like it,” she said. “But I’m busy. I used to have four patients per shift but now I have five.”

“I know you can handle it.”

“Thank you.” She looked down at the ground, her earlier confidence gone.

With her eyes averted, I stared at her face. “I heard you’re looking for an apartment.”

She nodded. “I found a few places close to work.
I prefer to walk instead of taking the subway, so proximity is important to me.”

Ugh. I wanted to scream. I hated thinking about her walking alone at night. It was already bad in Seattle but now it was unbearable.
Unable to say anything nice or appropriate, I didn’t say anything at all.

“How’s your family?”

“I haven’t talked to them.”

She raised an eyebrow. “In three months?”

“My mom would ask about you and I didn’t know what to say.” My mom would interrogate me until I told her every detail of the break up. That’s the last thing I wanted.

“They don’t know we broke up?”

I shook my head.

“Oh.”

“How’s your family?” I asked.

“They’re…fine.”

Her brother and I were close. I was bummed I wouldn’t see him anymore.

“I’m off tomorrow,” she said. “Let’s get a cup of coffee.”

She didn’t ask me. She just told me. Even though she sounded confident, she didn’t meet my gaze. I should say no. It wasn’t a good idea. I would just torture myself. “Okay.”
Fuck, why did I say that?

She looked at me, her eyes lit up like orbs. “Okay.” I could tell she wasn’t expecting that response.

Ryan joined our conversation. “Where’s Hazel?”

We both flinched when he appeared unexpectedly.

“She went to the bathroom,” I said.

Ryan looked pissed. “You should pay attention to your date, not this maneater.”

Monnique’s eyes widened but she didn’t retaliate. Normally, she would get in his face and even slap him. But she held back.

I got mad. “Ryan, don’t be like that.”

“Why should I?” He glared at Monnique. “You fucking stomped on him like he was sidewalk beneath your feet. And how dare you ask him to give up his entire life for you. He already did.”

I put my hand on his shoulder because he was getting louder. “Ryan, calm down.”

“No!”

“Are you drunk?” I snapped.

“It’s okay,” Monnique said. “I understand why he’s mad.”

Ryan got in her face. “If you think you can ditch him for three months, then come back like nothing happened you have a long road ahead of you. You think you can win Cortland over with
your looks and your apologies.?But you have to win all of us over. And let me tell you right now, I’m not easily persuaded.” He glared at her one more time before he walked off.

“I’m sorry about that,” I said. “I’ve tried talking him down but he won’t budge.”

“It’s okay.” Her eyes bubbled with tears but they didn’t fall. “I should go. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Monnique—”

She walked through the crowd and left through the exit. I was rooted to the spot, watching her go. I shouldn’t have said yes to the coffee date, but I physically couldn’t say no. I was naturally drawn to her. She was a magnet and I was steel.

7

Scarlet

Sean and I didn’t speak for the entire gala. Every time I looked at him, he was staring at me with the look I was accustomed to. But I liked it. I purposely did my hair and make up this way to torture him. I didn’t care how horny he was. He wasn’t getting anything from me.

Diane managed to piss me off even more. She laughed and talked to Sean and
Mike like they were a perfect family. I was really starting to hate this woman.

Ryan and Janice were fighting, and Cortland was somber about something Monnique said to him. My husband was pissed at me so I felt like I was alone. I got an ice water and tried not to cry. I tried not to let Diane bother me but she did. I just wanted to be accepted and loved. I never received that from my own parents. It was missing.

“Dance with me.”

I flinched and almost spilled my water. I didn’t even notice Sean was there. “No, thank you.” I kept my face away from his sight. I didn’t want him to know how upset I was.

“Come on. We haven’t spoken once. We need to act like we’re actually married in front of these people.”

“You sound like your mother,” I snapped. “Image is everything.”

He sighed. I could hear the frustration in his voice. “Scarlet, just dance with me.”

“No.” I acted like I was fascinated by the collection of wines and booze.

He grabbed my arm and forced me to face him. When he saw my face, his eyes softened. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

I pulled away. “Nothing.”

He hooked his arm around my waist. “You’re about to cry. I can see it.”

“I hate your fucking mother.” I’ve never sounded so cold. I felt like a bitch saying it, but it’s how I felt.

“I hate her too.” He said it with a straight face. “I’m just putting on a show so all our employees think we’re a happy family. Believe me. I’m not okay with the way she’s treating you. I’ll never be okay with it.”

I stared at his chest, unable to meet his gaze.

“Now I want to dance with you.”

“No, you don’t.”

“When you look hot like that, I do.”

I crossed my arms over my chest.

He hooked his arm around my waist then pulled me close to him. I didn’t feel like fighting right now. I gave in and let him hold me. His other hand moved up and down my back, relaxing me. I closed my eyes and tried to forget about all the noise in the room.

Sean
pulled me to the dance floor. His hand moved around my waist and the other held my hand in his. He swayed me back and forth, pressing his face to mine. He looked so handsome in his suit. I knew we were both trying to antagonize the other with our sex appeal. He kissed my forehead and continued to dance with me. I wasn’t sure if it was an act or he really just wanted to kiss me. When the song was over, he looked at me.

“Feel better?”

“A little.”

Diane approached us, a glare on her face. “We’re still missing the other half of the check we gave your mother.”

Seriously? She was going to do this now?
I was extremely close to punching her right in the nose then again in the mouth.

Sean was angry too. “If you want me to act like I actually like you, I suggest you don’t harass my wife. I will embarrass you so quickly. Don’t fuck with me.”

Her eyes widened at his words then she stormed off.

Could this week get any worse?
The stress was killing me. “I’m going home.”

“The gala isn’t over yet.”

“I don’t give a shit.” I pulled away from him then headed to the door. I’d take a cab home if I had to. I wasn’t going to stand in there with the Prestons and pretend I was one of them.

Sean ran after me then grabbed my arm when I was on the sidewalk. “I’ll take you home.”

“I’m fine. Go join your perfect family!” I raised my arm and waved down a cab.

“Don’t you even think about doing it!
” He grabbed my wrist and yanked me back. Then he told the cab to keep going. “I’ll take you home.”

“I don’t want to look at you.”

“I’m not happy with you either.”

Ryan and Cortland came outside when they realized something wasn’t right.

“Everything okay?” Ryan asked timidly.

“
For once, could you just give my wife and I a second?” Sean snapped.

Cortland shifted his weight. “Ryan, let’s go back inside.”

I pushed Sean away from me. “This marriage is a fucking joke. How can I be your wife when your family doesn’t even like me? I’m a damn embarrassment to all of you. Let’s just get a divorce.”

Sean stilled and his eyes widened.

Cortland gasped, and Ryan ran his fingers through his hair.

The tears poured down my face. I didn’t look at Sean.

“Take that back,” he said quietly.

I didn’t say anything.

“Don’t let my mom get to you. She’s a stupid bitch and I fucking hate her guts. I shouldn’t have even came to this damn gala, but I did because it was important to my dad, who I actually love and respect. Don’t let her make you this upset.”

“I just want to go home…”

“Not until you take that back. I need to hear you say that.”

I crossed my arms over my chest.

“Scarlet,” he pressed. The need and fear was in his voice. His eyes were so wide I thought they would pop.

“Okay,” I whispered.

“What?” he said. “Okay what?”

“I take it back.”

He breathed a sigh of relief. “Now I’ll take you home.” He wasn’t so aggressive but I could tell he was pissed at me for what I said.

Ryan and Cortland crept back into the building to give us privacy. The shit just hit the fan.

Sean walked beside me as we headed to the car. His hands were in his pockets and he didn’t touch me. When he got behind the wheel, he still didn’t touch me. We drove home in silence. I knew Sean broke the speed limit when he drove alone, but when he was with me, he always obeyed all the rules, even driving too slow sometimes.

When we finally walked inside the house, I darted up to our bedroom and pulled the earrings from my ear lobes. I waited for Sean to come to bed but after several minutes, he didn’t.
I knew I crossed a line that could never be uncrossed. I didn’t mean it. I was just so upset that I broke down.

After I changed into my nightdress, Sean charged into the bedroom. He grabbed me then pushed me down on the bed, pinning me so I couldn’t move. “Don’t you ever fucking say that to me again!” The anger burned in his eyes. For the first time, I was actually scared of him. “I’m your husband and I’m going to stay that way. I’ll never give you a divorce and I’ll never let you go. If you say that to me again, you better fucking mean it.” He released me then barged out of our room, slamming the door so hard, it fell off the hinges.

My heart raced in my chest. I caught my breath, still remembering the way he yelled at me. I wish I hadn’t said that. It was the worst thing I could possibly do. Now I pushed my husband away, the only person who was on my side from the beginning.