Accidentally in Love With a God (2012) (36 page)

“My name is Backlum Chaam,” he said with conceit. “I am one of the four Bacabs, the first gods.”

Guy’d never mentioned that they weren’t all born at the same time, but there must have been a pecking order; the way Chaam said “Bacabs” held some kind of importance, at least inside his bloated, chauvinistic head.

“Being the oldest, I have many talents,” he added.

Yes, yes. You arrogant toad. Of course you do.
“But, you’re the god of what, exactly?”

He stepped in closer, pressing his body against mine. I wanted to retch. “I am the God of Male Virility,” he said proudly.

Perfect. Lucky me.
“You
are
going to kill me? Right?” Death wasn’t sounding so bad compared to the other possible outcomes running through my mind.

“That will be up to you.” He flashed a sinister smile.

Baboon.
“I’m guessing there are strings attached to the living option, ones I won’t like.”
Come on, I know you want to make a sinister chuckle
, I thought.
Wait for it, wait for it…

Sinister chuckle.

Yep.

“Oh, I promise,” he explained. “All of the women I’ve laid with have thoroughly enjoyed every second, even your great grandmother.”

Double-eeew.
Was my great-grandfather propositioning me? “Why in the world would I sleep with you?”

“Aside from the fact that I can show you pleasures only found in dreams…”

My nightmares.

“We have come to the end of an important era.”

He so needed a new title. Perhaps, God of Medieval Debauchery? “You mean you’ve finally realized you’re a complete ass, and you’re going to stop killing innocent women?”

He frowned.

“Yes,” I continued. “That’s right. I heard all about your lovely Scabs picking off the ladies. That’s so classy, by the way, but why go through all that trouble to make Payals if your army of Scaby losers just murder them?”

“Only the women who prove incapable of carrying my seed are ‘picked off.’ The priests do so enjoy a good hunt.”

I really wanted to hurt this man—being—whatever. He was a waste of good air.

“But the others,” he rattled on, “the ones who have the good fortune to carry a child for me, they get to live and raise my offspring.”

Oh, yes. Good fortune, indeed. Murderous, evil prick!
“So you take innocent, young women—virgins—hoping their first baby will be a female like me?”

He made a low, gravely laugh. “You’re right, but don’t undervalue the firstborn boys. Ahhh, my boys,” he said stoically, “I send them to become Maaskab. It was quite the upgrade for that little band of archaic Mayan witchdoctors. With my blood and leadership, they’ve become most powerful. Such fun.”

I’d been right about the Maaskab. They weren’t entirely human.
Oh, Christ!
I thought. Was my uncle in California a Maaskab? What would have happened if I’d gone to live with him?

Put it in your “Can’t Deal With It Now Pocket,”
I thought. Boy, that thing had to be getting full.

Chaam leaned against the cold, moist wall and crossed his arms. “But, they’re sadly lacking in the strategic thinking department, thus the reason we recruit leaders like Tommaso. Quite easy to do with the right catalyst.”

Catalyst?
“You mean you killed his poor family?” I asked.

“Yes, but that didn’t quite provide the result we wanted. Luckily, we’ve discovered another more effective way to gain people’s allegiance.”

Oh, goody. Evil confession time,
I thought.
I really, really am going to die. Because bad guys only spill their guts when they’re about to slit your throat
. “Yes? Go on.”

Chaam paused and smiled. “Okay,” he said cheerfully. “I’m so proud of this little tidbit that I must share.” He clapped his hands.

I suddenly realized that for once, Guy was wrong. His brother wasn’t more arrogant, Chaam was simply bonkers.

“We’ve discovered a way to liquefy the black jade. We can inject it into any human. They’re consumed with a hunger for darkness, and they must feed it, or the jade starts to turn on them.”

“You mean, it creates an addiction to being bad?”

“It’s damned brilliant!” he replied. “The jade has so many uses.”

Poor, poor Tommaso. He’d been injected with foul, demonic heroine. Somewhere, deep down inside, I
knew
he didn’t want to hurt me.

“Personally,” Chaam added, “I use it to polish my teeth.” He smiled and showed me his pearly white smile. “See.”

Boy, he really
was
bonkers. And evil. But, he did have nice teeth.

Chaam continued, “However, I have to admit, the jade can’t do everything. Fuel my weapons, for one.”

“The little jars?” I asked.

He had the look of joyful madness in his eyes. “Giant jars, Emma! Those little ones were merely prototypes. We ended up using those to create traps in the cenotes, or to distract Cimil—she always gets in my hair. Nosy bitch. But no matter, now we have four colossal structures filled with seventy years worth of the most potent energy I could find.”

He explained in horrific detail how he had the Maaskab kidnap thousands of women. And, with the aid of the black jade, he’d slept with them, taken the female children once fully grown, and then coaxed the dark light into their bodies through various forms of torture. All for the purpose of extracting their light, their life force. Their bodies, being part deity, made them more powerful than any human, and their humanity made them mortal.

He was creating Payals for biofuel.

I wanted to vomit. He was beyond evil. And medieval. And he was the poster child for debauchery. He was every single nightmare I’d ever had rolled into one. The poor women. He probably lulled them into submission with his pheromones to impregnate them, only to later steal away their children and kill the girls. His own daughters. Sick. Sick. Sick.

“So you’re going to torture me so you can put my tainted god-juice in your giant jars? Then what?”

“Well, my dear, this is where you get to make a choice. My vessels of destruction are almost filled now, and I have all the Payals I need. Once I release the energy stored inside the structures, darkness will sweep across the world like a giant tidal wave of decay—devouring any human flesh it comes in contact with.”

Oh. Oh,
no. This was bad. Way bad.

“Those who take refuge inside the jade mines will be perfectly safe, but the rest of mankind will perish. In fact, my boys are busy sealing the entrances to mineshafts now. So…will you join them or become apocalyptic fertilizer for my giant jars?”

“Sorry?” I was still trying to grasp the situation. End of my family and friends? End of humanity? Everyone on the face of the planet, except for Scabs?

“This last structure, my pyramid, is waiting for a good topping-off.” He made a dramatic wave of his hand. “You can choose: die or have a life with me.”

“Why would anyone want a life with you?”

“Silly woman. Even after the apocalypse, I’ll still have needs. I am the God of Male Virility. And you are by far the strongest Payal I’ve ever seen, even with your distance from my lineage. Who knows, maybe I’ll let you have a few children and keep them.”

Yack. Shudder. Cringe. “That’s such a fabulous offer—really—I’m mulling it over this very second. But I meant why do you need to kill absolutely everyone else?”

“Humans, Emma, are destroying this world. They’re like radioactive cockroaches. I’m simply giving fate a hand, taking out the trash before the planet is irreparable.”

I remembered Guy mentioning that the gods were hardwired to protect humans, even if they got tired of it. Chaam’s wiring had gotten crossed.

“What about the other gods? What will they do when they get out?”

“They’re not going anywhere. And besides, after the energy’s been released, what can they do? They can’t bring back all of those people—in fact, the other gods might thank me for freeing them from their tedious eternal duties of rescuing the stupid humans.”

“I think you’re wrong. I think when Guy is set free, he’ll spend the rest of eternity kicking your arrogant, repugnant ass.”

He arched one brow and then stuck out his lower lip in a pout. “Oh. The little Payal doesn’t like me. I thought you might be a good candidate for immortality and sack-play, but alas…” His smile was evil incarnate. “The little primate wishes to join her grandmother. Fine with me, I have a thousand others to choose from.”

“Grandmother?
You
killed my grandmother?”

I wanted to jump on his head and pound it into the stone floor. What kind of sick animal could hurt a sweet old woman like her? For heaven’s sake, he was her
father.

“Oh yes, Emma. She was so full of light. It amazed me how long she held on. Hours and hours of torture. Can you see it in your mind? Of course, she came to me well-primed since her own sister lured her to me and betrayed her. I made sure to repeat that fact several times. The angrier, the better. More dark fuel.”

There it was. The answer I’d been looking for. My darkest fears confirmed. My poor grandmother had been tortured and then killed by Chaam. Could I ever tell my mom such a thing? Would I ever get the chance? Not likely. Perhaps it was for the best. Then there was the horrible truth about Rosa and Arturo. They’d lured Grandma to her death. I partially wished Guy’d let them live, so I could have kill them myself.

Oh, sweet Virgin of Guadalupe.
I gasped. I was filling with hatred, just like he wanted.

He continued his malevolent banter, “Well, look at that.” He bent down and peered into my eyes. “Already turning colors. Once they’re black, you’ll be all ready to go.”

“Fuck you! I hope Guy rips your heart from your body and makes you choke on it.”

“Good girl. Let that darkness in.” He pounded on the door and it swung opened. “See you at the top of the pyramid, baby.”

I felt sick to my stomach. Everything I’d ever loved would soon be gone. And stupid, stupid me. I could have stopped this. I almost deserved to die. If Darwin were still alive, I’m sure I’d get his vote.

Well, I wasn’t going to go down without a fight; I’d claw and kick until my last breath. And if I couldn’t fight my way free, I certainly wasn’t going to help Chaam by becoming his biofuel. My last act would be one I could be proud of. I would think of everything and everyone I loved, every good memory in my life. Chaam would be hard pressed to squeeze even a drop of darkness from me.

I planted myself on the floor, sitting with my legs crossed. I closed my eyes and began playing the sunniest memories of my life. I pictured my parents and every wonderful thing about them; how they’d always cared, no matter how bonkers I acted. I thought about my grandmother, her soft hands, the floral smell of her hair when she hugged me. Her laughter. I thought about my friends, Nick, Jess, and Anne and their outrageous appetite for life, including their relentless belief that someday I’d get a date. Then I thought about Guy singing Madam Butterfly and how my life-long friend, guardian, and tormenter had been a real, live god. I thought about him screaming he loved me.

“If by some miracle any of you can hear me…I love you, too, and I’m sorry I let everyone down.”

Chapter THIRTY-NINE

In all his years, Guy had never seen anything like it.

“It’s like that bloody show Emma used to watch, Star Trek.” Guy scratched the black stubble sprouting along his jaw while Gabrán’s men attempted to penetrate the transparent wall with various objects. Daggers, sticks, they even threw a few rocks. Nothing went through, and it was too high to climb over. “Damned evil bastards have a bloody force field.”

Gabrán spouted, “Thanks to help from one o’ you.”

Guy grunted. He still had a hard time believing one of the gods was involved. But Gabrán was right; this kind of energy manipulation was divine in origin.

Guy, Gabrán, and the men were finally forced to weave through the never-ending maze of invisible walls the Maaskab had erected around the perimeter of their village by feeling their way until an opening appeared. Then they walked for hours more until they found another. A painfully slow process. It was well past nightfall by the time they arrived to the outskirts of the Maaskab village.

“Where is everyone?” Guy whispered. The village appeared eerily vacant. The thatched roof huts were dark inside and only the crickets chirped.

“I don’t know,” Gabrán replied. “But we cannot go in tonight. My men need rest before we fight.”

Guy couldn’t wait; he needed to know Emma was still alive. If he had to, he’d tear the village apart stone by stone with his bare hands to find her.