A Sense of Duty: A Former Navy SEAL Falls in Love and Begins a New Journey with his Private Consulting Company: Dark Horse Guardians (6 page)

~Lara~

Sipping cold spring water, Lara sank into the down-filled sofa in her comfortable parlor. She turned on the lamp. Her apartment was quiet and she only heard the ticking of the wall clock in the background. It made her think about the clock ticking inside of her. She was twenty-four years old, almost twenty-five, and never had a real boyfriend, except for Eric Henderson. Yet, she didn't think about Eric as a boyfriend. He was more of a friend. Ben ignited something in her that she had never felt. She was worried about the intensity she felt when Ben kissed her hand and touched her hair. There were two reasons she was worried about physical contact with him. Number one was that he might be a married man. But, her second concern was regarding her own uneasiness with physical touch.

She felt embarrassed by what happened to her years ago. After being beaten and raped, she had not been able to get close enough to a man to have a physical relationship. Over the past few months, the weekend dates with Eric had served to help her overcome some of her anxiety about being close to a man. Sure, she had kissed Eric and they were good friends, but that was where it ended. She still suffered from night terrors and sometimes found herself in the middle of the attack, reliving it. The nightmare was always the same. She would wake up screaming and sweating, fighting the covers on her bed, punching her pillow. Then, breathless from exertion, she would turn on the light and steady herself. She usually could not go back to sleep. The only solution was for her to find a distraction to forget about the bad dream. Sometimes she would watch television or talk with Olivia on the phone. Sometimes just doing a crossword puzzle helped.

Her mind was now consumed with the coming evening. What would she wear for Ben tonight? Then thought: this must be what happens to women when they have fallen for someone. Lara had never thought this way about Eric, or any guy for that matter. She never cared what she wore or what men thought of her. On rare occasion, Eric had kissed her, but never had she quivered like she did today when Ben simply touched her hair. This was different. She took a long hot shower and washed her hair, all the while thinking of Ben taking a shower and washing his hair.
But was he married?
That was the question. And, she simply had to obtain the answer. It was against her rules to date a married man.

Tonight she would be the interrogator and he would be the one answering the questions. Lara's hair fell below her shoulders to the middle of her back. She smiled as she thought of Ben's reaction to her comment about cutting it. She dried the mass of waves and pulled her long thick hair into a loose side pony tail. She put on dangling diamond earrings and lipstick, a different shade tonight, an innocent pink, just for Ben. Instead of her usual long sweaters, she chose a white fitted top that had a small delicate ruffle down the front with long sleeves. No bra. She loved Victorian architecture, but hated Victorian underwear. Black pants and a pink wool jacket finished her unexpectedly feminine outfit. Boots, pink leather sack, and the doorbell buzzed. It was an old-fashioned doorbell and it startled her for a moment. Lara's doorbell rarely buzzed. She knew it was Ben.

As Lara unlocked the three locks on her apartment door, she skipped down the stairs to unlock the two dead bolts on the outside door to the porch. Fumbling with the lock, she paused briefly to look at Ben through the wavy glass of the door. He stood patiently in a well worn brown leather jacket and khakis. His face had color from being outside and his blue eyes seemed filled with anticipation. Her heart stopped beating for a moment. At that precise second Lara knew she was completely and absolutely in love with Ben, married or not. The door opened and he stepped inside to the small creaky stairway. Lara caught a trace of his masculine scent, lavender and sandalwood mixed with leather. Ben stepped confidently into the hallway and looked into her eyes. "Hi, Lara…ready to go?" She wanted to reach her arms around his neck in a warm embrace, but instead she awkwardly smiled, "Hi Ben." She feared her voice sounded immature. "I have your chariot waiting, my lady." he spoke with his Irish accent and made a grand gesture as he bowed before her, which made her laugh. Ben opened the porch door and she ran to the driveway to admire Ben's "Chief". Brand new, it was a 1940 vintage inspired Indian motorcycle with shiny black paint and beautifully curved lines. The machine seemed to be the perfect symbol for Ben and his masculinity. He handed her a vintage helmet and goggles. He slipped his gear on and flashed a dimpled smile with a devilish look in his blue eyes. "Are you ready for this?" He asked her. She nodded and wrapped her arms around him and they were off. Lara was terrified. She had never been on a motorcycle in her life.

For a moment, she was filled with anxiety as she mounted the motorcycle with Ben. She immediately felt a loss of control. As Ben started the bike, the motor roared and vibrated against their bodies. As the machine picked up speed, the power became a primal blast of excitement. She felt her long hair flying from under the helmet as the air whipped by. When they stopped at traffic lights, people pointed and stared at the beautiful vintage-inspired cycle. Ben planted his feet firmly on the ground until the light turned green. She relaxed into his body trusting his instincts as he laid into the curves. Ben was at one with this machine. It was obvious to Lara that when it came to riding motorcycles, he was very experienced.

~Ben~

Hopeful to make Lara's first motorcycle ride enjoyable, Ben took the longest route to the restaurant. He lived on the bike except for when it was in the garage for the winter season. He'd been riding since the age of sixteen when he had a real 1940 vintage Indian Chief. He worked on that bike lovingly restoring it for too many years. The new 1940 Indian replica was a treat he allowed himself to buy once he started Dark Horse. Ben especially enjoyed Lara clinging to him. He instinctively knew that she had never been on a motorcycle before and sensed her anxiety. But as the ride continued, he felt her relaxing into his back. Her cheek was pressed against his leather jacket and her arms were tightly wrapped around his chest. Careful not to exceed the speed limit, he wanted her first encounter with his Indian motorcycle to be enjoyable. People always waved at him on the 1940 Indian, but today it seemed they were not only noticing the beautiful lines of the bike, but the dark haired beauty with her arms wrapped around him.

~Lara~

Arriving at the waterside restaurant parking lot, Lara was breathless with excitement from the ride. Several people had gathered to view Ben's Indian motorcycle. Dazzled by its performance and curvaceous lines, Lara smiled at him. "It's simply beautiful." she sighed. "Especially with you on it." he added. A cool autumn breeze from the ocean blew past the handsome couple as they walked into the Seafood Palace on the waterfront in Portland. He tucked her arm under his and walked into the building with a sense of purpose. Lara felt exhilaration whenever Ben touched her. The motorcycle ride was filled with pleasures she hadn't expected: the air rushing past, the vibration of the motor, inhaling Ben's scent, her arms cinched around his solid waist, her face against his broad muscular back. She had never experienced twenty minutes packed with such overwhelming physical delight. It was the first time she enjoyed being close to a man.

Like diamonds, the reflection of the city lights sparkled on the water. Downtown Portland was bustling with urban dwellers seeking good hot food. The restaurant was a Portland favorite. It was an older one-story oceanfront building that housed one of the best seafood places on the planet. The interior was filled with huge windows giving views to the Portland harbor. As Lara and Ben made their way to a table, she spied her closest buddy. He saw her walk in and was trying to get her attention. Don Henderson, Lara's martial arts instructor and Eric's uncle, waved her to his table. She pulled Ben in that direction and Don stood, all six-foot-four inches of him, as he extended his wide hand to both of them. "Come on over and sit with us….we just got here." Don was exuberant to see her and curious as hell about Ben. Lara tried to read Ben as he smiled and made a cordial introduction. They sat across from Don and his wife, Olivia. Lara had known Don longer than anyone else, at least ten years. They met after her attack when she turned fifteen. Don said she was suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, but Lara would not accept his diagnosis. Instead of arguing with her, Don had patiently talked her into immersing herself into mixed martial arts. Lara assumed Ben had no idea of the nature of her special kinship with Don and his wife.

She was fearful that Don and Olivia might bring up the subject of Eric. She chatted about the weather and architectural projects. She spoke with excitement about her upcoming graduation in the spring. She couldn't wait to be in the working world one hundred percent of the time. She was looking forward to new challenges. Don said, "I think you might get a job offer from the firm." As Lara introduced Ben, she explained that he was a new professor at the university. Don grilled Ben like a professional. He asked him many questions throughout the meal. Good, Lara thought. Don is doing my dirty work for me. "Married or single?" Don asked. "Separated" Ben replied. "Do you have any children?" Don asked. "One" Ben replied. "How old? Boy or girl? Don was pushing. "A boy, eight years old" Ben said softly. "Where do they live?" Don pried. "In Vancouver Canada" Ben said. "What do you teach?" Don continued.

Ben gave a brief sketch of his Navy background and spoke enthusiastically about his new teaching position. Don was sizing up Ben, making judgments and decisions as to whether or not he was a stand-up guy. Finally, Lara was relieved when Olivia broke the tension. She remarked on the white ruffled shirt Lara was wearing. "What a lovely blouse you have on tonight, Lara." She said tongue-in-cheek. Lara knew Olivia had been watching Ben's eyes on her throughout the entire meal. In fact, he rarely moved his gaze from her, except when answering Don's questions. But when he gave an answer he looked Don squarely in the eye. Olivia was very observant. She knew Lara had dressed for Ben tonight and sensed the electricity between them. "I never see you in feminine clothing. It's usually business suits." Olivia smiled. "I like it. It's a good look for you." Then Olivia teased Lara about her large, ever present, hot pink leather sack. But it was a good-natured teasing, because Olivia knew all about the bag. She knew all there was to know about Lara.

After coffee, Ben was ready to sweep Lara away on the motorcycle and they took their chance to leave. As she stood, Lara thanked Don and Olivia for their good company and felt relief that the subject of Eric had not been brought up. Don winked at Lara. She knew he would contact her later to discuss Ben at length; that was his modus operandi. Don Henderson was the big brother every woman wished she had. Lara felt fortunate he was in her life. Don was one of the very few people in the world who really understood Lara's obsessive-compulsive problems, phobias and anxieties. He knew why she had panic attacks and nightmares. Don Henderson had big shoulders and Lara frequently used them to shore herself up. He was always there to listen and offer his advice.

Leaving the noise of the restaurant and stepping out into the fresh ocean air, Lara inhaled the familiar salty smell of the harbor. Ben held her hand as they walked toward the motorcycle. Although he was smiling at her, Lara was not so sure that Ben enjoyed Don's interrogation. "Best lobster I've ever eaten." Ben quipped, "And that water view is incredible." A small crowd had gathered around the outside of the restaurant eyeing Ben's 1940 Indian Chief. As she mounted the motorcycle, Lara savored the closeness to Ben. Wrapping her arms around him, she delighted as she reached her hands underneath his open leather jacket and felt his muscled chest. She smiled to herself as she put her cheek against his back inhaling the aroma of the leather. She was thoroughly enjoying this secret thrill. Lara could have ridden for hours holding Ben. As they stopped in her driveway, he kicked the stand out from under the bike as if he had done it a million times. Ben, acting gallantly, helped her dismount. His strong arms encircled her waist and he lifted her off the machine. He drew her close to him for a split second. "I hope you are not put off by the talk about my private life tonight," he said tentatively. "Why should I be put off? It's the unvarnished truth and I would rather hear it now." Lara said logically trying to sound void of emotion. Ben was pensive for a moment, then spoke, "You're not upset that I am still legally married?" Lara swallowed hard and tried to remain neutral. "It's not the best situation….however…you are separated…" She did not continue. She knew there would be a lengthy discussion about this subject. Feeling his blue eyes upon her, Lara said casually, "Coming in?"

The porch light was on and Lara opened the antique door to the creaky staircase and closed it awkwardly latching both locks. Ben caught her hand. She stopped breathing. He kissed the back of her hand and his blue eyes gazed into her eyes intently. She lightly trailed his hand behind her as she led him up the stairs. Then, slowly she opened the three deadbolts on her apartment door, which seemed to take an eternity. Inside, she dropped the keys into the candy dish. The small lamp was casting a warm glow on Lara's charming apartment. She kicked off her boots and Ben removed her jacket, then his boots and jacket. "Why do you have five locks on your doors, if you don't mind me asking?" Ben queried, hoping she would begin to let him into her life. Lara ignored his question, asking Ben if he would like a drink. "Water, please, and I'd love a tour of your apartment." Walking him through each room, Lara showcased all of the original features of the condo, pointing out the plaster moldings, and lovely period furnishings she had carefully selected from architectural salvage yards and auctions.