A Second Chance Love (8 page)

They immediately started yelling and talking over each other and I couldn’t make out one word of what they were saying, but I had a pretty good idea so I just rolled my eyes and laughed to myself. “Stop… I can’t make out what you’re saying. Just calm down.”

I was surprised when it was Kyle that took charge. “Kerri, are you okay?”

“Yes, not a single scratch.”

“What about the claustrophobia? Are you going to be okay while we dig you out? Part of the barn is lying over the door in pieces and it will take a little while to get them off.”

While he sounded concerned, I had the feeling he wasn’t the one who was freaking over my being stuck down here longer.

I heard Jacob go off on another rant and realized why Kyle had taken over. Our strong Jacob had hit his breaking point. He had already blamed himself for my estrangement from my father, which was probably why he had gone behind my back to talk to Dad. He still sent holiday and birthday cards to the family that had disowned him over Kyle in the hopes of reconciling.

“Jacob! I’m okay. Now that I can hear you, I promise I’m not the least bit afraid.”

“Kerri, I’ll get you out as soon as possible.” Jacob’s voice was so serious that I was worried about him.

“Jacob, I’m fine.”

“Really?” He still sounded skeptical.

“Really. Pinkie swear.” I knew he had been scared out his mind for me but for the love of God, was I speaking English?
Okay, so maybe I am a little stressed.

“Oh, good.” Jacob sounded so relieved.

Seriously, I had to pinkie swear for the big, bad cowboy to believe me?
If it works, fine,
I huffed to myself.

“She’s okay, Mr Mullnex,” I heard Jacob yell. “You need to stay back while we move this shit off so we can get her out.”

My dad would grumble about helping, but I also knew with his history of heart problems, my guys wouldn’t let him do anything strenuous. I grinned as I heard Kyle assign my dad to go get drinks and first aid kits.

“Kerri!” My dad was bellowing my name.

“I’m fine, Dad!” I yelled back at the top of my lungs. “Go ahead and get the stuff. We might need it.”

I listened as they moved things around, making impatient noises and the occasional profanity-laced rant. I actually got a kick out of those. I tried to mouth the words along with them to see how many swear words I could match up. I was about three out of five, I thought. Not bad.

Finally I saw the handle move and the door opened and there they were. Jacob and Kyle, looking very tired, worried, filthy, sweaty and a little bloody. And never had they looked more wonderful. As if we had choreographed it, I lifted both my arms up as they reached down to me and plucked me right up into their arms in one smooth movement, holding me to them as they both buried their faces in my hair.

“Kerri.”

I jumped a bit at my dad’s voice and I looked over at him warily. Tightening my arms around Kyle and Jacob, I braced myself for whatever he had to say. He wasn’t a cruel man, so I didn’t expect anything bad, just another appeal for me to go home with him. But all I wanted to do was curl up with my guys in our bed, and I was afraid to even look over at our house right now, to see if we still had one. Jacob and Kyle were standing in front of me, blocking my view, and I wondered if it was because they didn’t want me to see that our house was gone.

“I’m sorry. They love you, I could see that today when they thought they might lose you. You are right, that’s what’s important.” There was relief and love all tangled up in his eyes.

I reached out and grabbed the hand he offered, grateful beyond words to have my dad back.

* * * *

“What are we going to do about Jacob, Kerri?” Kyle’s voice came from behind me as I wiped down the kitchen counters.

I sighed. “I don’t know, Kyle. I’m worried. We were so lucky that the house escaped the heavy damage and so did the livestock.” We had lost the barn, some other small buildings and equipment, but nothing that couldn’t be replaced. “Do you think he is really that pissed that I insisted on helping pay for repairs with my money from Caleb’s life insurance?”

“I don’t know, to be honest. I have never seen him like this. He is short-tempered and everything sets him off. And, dear God, I don’t know about you, but this obsession he has over our health and safety is driving me crazy. That part I can understand to a point, but he went ballistic when he caught me using the table saw by myself.” He came up behind me to hold me tight.

“Yeah, that is getting way out of control. He found me on a ladder changing a light bulb.” I winced at the memory of that rant. “From his reaction you would have thought I was on a four-story high tightrope without a net.”

“He isn’t sleeping. How many times have we woken up and he has been gone in the middle of the night?”

“Too damn many.” I turned around so I could hold him too. My sweet Kyle. “Where is he?”

“He went into town to pick up something from the store and I saw my chance to talk to you.” He leaned to rest his forehead against mine. “Do you have any ideas?”

“Actually, yes. It’ll take some planning and some sneakiness.” I grinned up at him. “Are you up for it?”

“Do you mean what I think you do?” He quirked an eyebrow at me.

“Yes, I do. We are going to seduce ourselves a rough and tough cowboy. By the time we get through with the big lug, he will be a big puddle of goo and will spill all.” I pictured Jacob in my mind and made a vow. “Kyle, for once he is going to let us take care of him.”

Chapter Four

It was five days later and Sunday afternoon. Operation ‘Stubborn Bastard’ was a go. Unbeknownst to Jacob, all the hands had been told to stay away from the house even if the apocalypse occurred. Brian, one of our best men, had dryly stated that the apocalypse had already occurred, the antichrist had taken up residence in the boss and it was about fucking time we performed an exorcism.

I had wanted to protest that it wasn’t that bad and Kyle even tried to sputter one out. But faced with four men with their arms crossed wearing the same concerned and frustrated expressions we had, I finally just shrugged. “I know.”

I had fixed Jacob’s favorite. Pulled pork, which I had slow cooked overnight and stripped this morning so it could simmer in my homemade sauce. The added benefit was the slow-cooker dish could just be put in the fridge so there was no clean-up needed when we moved to the next step.

“That was great, sweetheart, thank you.” Jacob pushed his chair back from the table. “I have a few things I should go do though.”

Yes, just not what you’re thinking.

I exchanged a quick glance with Kyle first then moved my eyes back to Jacob and gave him my best guileless look. That he didn’t immediately become suspicious went to show just how messed up he was. Our old Jacob not only would’ve gone on guard, he would’ve had flashing lights and warning sirens going off in his mind.

“Can you come upstairs with me first, Jacob?” I asked quietly, hoping he wouldn’t ask for a reason.

He sighed. “Sure.”

He followed me upstairs to our room and grunted in surprise when I climbed on the bed after I stripped off the loose fitting cotton dress I had been wearing. The only clothing I had left was his favorite lacy black bra and panty set.

“What are you doing, Kerri?” His eyes were devouring me, but his tone let me know he wasn’t going to let this happen easily.

“Trying to get your attention. Is it working?”

“What do you mean?” He tilted his head at me in confusion. “You and Kyle are all I think about. I spend every minute I have trying to fix everything for both of you.”

“But when was the last time you spent time with us? You work all day and keep on going until we drag you to bed, then you’re so exhausted you collapse. We wake up in the morning and you’re already gone. We miss you, Jacob, and we’re worried. What is wrong?” I pleaded with him. “Just talk to us.”

He ran his hands over his face. He looked so tired. His skin was pale and lined. There were bags under his eyes. He was literally making himself sick. “Kerri, I’m not doing this. I need to get things done.”

I watched as he turned only to realize that Kyle stood in the doorway with his hands grasping both sides.

Where I had tried the softer approach, I could tell from Kyle’s blazing eyes that he was more than willing to take the harder line.

“Jacob, you’re doing this because I’m not letting you out of this room. There is nothing that needs to be done today and the only reason there has been so much for you to do is you won’t let me do half of the things
I
should be doing.” Kyle let go of the door and started fisting his hands in his hair. His eyes twitched, betraying just how anxious he was. “Have I done something wrong?”

“No, no how could you possibly think that?” Jacob flinched, almost like he had been slapped on the cheek. The thought of Kyle blaming himself must have truly shocked him. He paled then said. “I’m the one who fucked everything up.”

I watched as he started pacing around with his eyes bouncing between Kyle and me wildly.
What the hell?

“I’m the one who keeps fucking everything up!” Jacob yelled.

My eyes snapped to Kyle’s and we both realized this was way more serious than we had thought.
Oh, my God, what had we missed?
What had been going on with this man we both loved so dearly?

“Jacob, what do you mean?” I asked him. “You haven’t screwed anything up.” I tried to be loud enough to get him to pay attention without sounding angry. I think he would’ve shattered if he thought we were angry.

“Yes, I have,” Jacob answered me almost tearfully. “I am the one who convinced you not to go talk to your dad right away. Then he comes out here and the two of you fight. Maybe he wouldn’t have been so upset if we had told him sooner.” He took a deep breath, shuddering. “I was so afraid that if he made you choose, you would eventually decide to leave us. That maybe Kyle would go with you. Or if he stayed with me, I would have to share him with other women again. I can’t face not being enough again.”

At that point Jacob buried his face in hands.

Kyle’s face drained of color. He rushed over to Jacob, pulling his hands away. “Oh, God, baby, why would you ever think you were not enough?”

“Because I never was before,” Jacob said quietly. “Then when I tried to fix things with your dad, Kerri”—he looked over at me—“I wasn’t here when you needed me.”

“You were exactly where I needed you. You and Kyle got me out.” I came over and kissed him on the forehead. “I love you, Jacob. I would never leave you.” I moved out of the way as Kyle came back.

Kyle reached up and cupped Jacob’s face as if it was the most precious thing in the world to him. “I am so sorry that you ever thought that you weren’t enough for me. I wish I had never suggested trying to find someone else.” He sighed. “I was afraid. You were missing her and I was afraid of losing you too. We were so worried about trying to give each other what we thought was needed…” He gave a self-deprecating smile. “Face it, Jacob, we were bloody stupid. We did everything but ask each other and be honest.”

“I didn’t want the other women, Jacob. Not after we fell for Kerri. I mean the sex was nice and it was fun at first when we first started at college, but we grew up. Nothing with them compares to what I feel with you. And now that I know what it feels like with the three us.” He moved one hand to bring me to them. “If it’s not Kerri, I won’t share what we have with anyone ever again.”

I closed my eyes, overwhelmed with guilt. I’d caused them so much pain and I’d been completely oblivious. I snuggled into them, holding them both to me. “Why have you been running yourself into the ground, Jacob?” I thought about what he’d said about fucking up. “Were you trying to fix everything so we wouldn’t be angry anymore?”

“Kerri! What the hell!” Kyle’s eyes on me were sharp as he turned his face to me. A part of me noticed that he shifted just a bit so he could grip Jacob even tighter, protectively. “Nothing was his fault!”

“No shit! Of course not, Kyle. But he was blaming himself, so he was afraid we would blame him too.” I could see the painful vulnerability in Jacob’s eyes, and I put the pieces together. Watching my relationship with my father implode must have been horrifyingly familiar to a man who had grown up as a beloved child. Jacob had been brutally disowned the second he’d come out to his parents—he’d known all along it would happen if he chose Kyle.

Had he actually thought we might want him to leave?
His parents had because he was gay, so maybe he really did think he was disposable.
Oh, fuck no!

I made my voice steel hard. “Jacob, I don’t care if you really do fuck up, you are ours. We are keeping you forever, so we sure as hell aren’t kicking you to the curb over this.”

Kyle’s lips parted in a slight, almost silent gasp, and his eyebrows rose. As he watched Jacob’s shoulders slump, a silent admission that there was nothing left to hide, his expression changed. His green eyes darkened with a hungry heat and the stance of his entire body changed to aggressive. He stood taller and shifted his weight to the balls of his feet. And everything about the way his eyes were devouring Jacob screamed ‘mine’. That surprised me. While I had seen that look directed at me before, I don’t think Kyle had ever taken that dynamic with Jacob before. Not just around me. I mean ever. He grabbed Jacob by nape of his neck, pulling the hair just hard enough to be a little painful. “I think it is about time you realize that you belong to me, to us, and we are
never
letting you go. Do you understand what I am saying? When we are through, there will be no doubt that we own you just as much as you own us. The way you have
always
owned me
.
”

I looked at Kyle in shock. We might call Jacob our ‘gentle giant’, but in bed he had always taken the lead and tended to be forceful about it too. But when I observed Jacob’s reaction to Kyle’s show of possession, how his eyes went needy while his body went pliant, I wondered how much of that had been him trying to be what he thought we wanted.