A New Resolution (16 page)

He climbed the stairs and was unsurprised to see the lights off and a giant lump underneath the covers. Nolan was a beer-drinking, sports-loving guy through and through, but he did have a tendency to bask in the dramatics. Kieran crawled under the covers, pulling Nolan onto his chest and curling his arms around him.

After a moment Nolan acknowledged his presence and sighed, digging his fingers into Kieran’s chest. “Why aren’t you with Lore?”

“Because you need me here with you, and coincidentally she canceled.”

“What?” he asked, lifting his head. “Is she okay?”

“She’s fine, didn’t tell me why she canceled, though, just told me something came up.”

Nolan threw the covers off both of them, sitting up in bed. “Is she making up excuses to push us away again?”

Kieran rested against the headboard, stretching his legs out along their comfortable king-size bed. “That’s what I thought. Then she asked if you were gonna be at work tomorrow.”

“Why?”

“Because she needed legal guidance and wanted your opinion on something.”

“Wait.” Nolan waved his hands in front of his face, a gesture Kieran was familiar with. With a simple hand gesture, Nolan erased whatever stew he had let himself fall into regarding Mia and focused his attention on Lore entirely. Mission accomplished. Kieran tried not smile at his victory. “Why does she need legal guidance? Something has to be wrong for her to ask that.”

“Agreed. But she talked me off the phone so fast I got whiplash.”

Nolan nodded while getting out of bed and reaching for a pair of jeans. “We should go over there, see if she’s okay.”

Kieran rejoiced inwardly, having depended upon this precise reaction once he’d mentioned Lore’s peculiar phone call. Not that he didn’t want to talk about the Mia encounter with Nolan, but Nolan wasn’t ready to talk about it yet. Giving Nolan some time to focus on and help somebody else he cared for would help him sort out his thoughts and emotions on the matter.

“She canceled for a reason, Nolan, and you were the one who wanted to cancel in the first place.”

“I changed my mind. Something could be wrong.”

Kieran knelt on the bed before pulling Nolan toward him for a sweet kiss on the corner of his mouth. “If you say so, love.”

* * * *

Lore sat huddled in the dark of her father’s office, the 9 millimeter held firmly in her hand, her knees resting on the floor. She was in a ready crouch, prepared to jump and attack if need be. She’d remained in this position for the past hour, waiting with stilted breath for an attacker to come slamming through the door, guns ablaze.

She was being paranoid, of course. This was all unnecessary. The car she’d thought had followed her on her way home from the bank was nothing to worry about. And most importantly, the ominous letter in her parents’ mailbox telling her to turn the elusive and most likely nonexistent client list over to the authorities was positively harmless. Nope, completely and hilariously paranoid.

Nolan and Kieran would laugh when they heard of her crazy antics: shaking huddled in the dark, waiting for some mysterious villain to charge the house. She would laugh later too, though she didn’t feel like laughing right then.

Thinking of Nolan and Kieran brought the unexpected information from earlier to mind. Three ex-wives. Who in the world had three ex-wives at Nolan’s age, and what was wrong with all those women that they’d let such a marvelous man go? What had they done to end the marriage, or worse…what had he done? No, she knew Nolan was a good man. She would give him the benefit of the doubt, but she shouldn’t place blame on the women too hastily either. Maybe it had been a mutual agreement…three times?

A creak on the front porch. Shuffling feet. Voices spoke in hushed tones just low enough for the words to be unintelligible. She gripped the gun tight, made sure the safety was off, and squared her shoulders, pointing the gun at the closed office door. She crouched beneath one of the front-facing windows, a perfect position if the office was broken into as the door would swing toward her, and she would have some cover for a brief moment of time.

The voices grew louder, and the doorbell rang, making her heart jump through her skin. So they wouldn’t try to break in at first. At least the fuckers were polite. She listened intently, hoping to catch a word or two from the would-be criminals.

“Do you think she’s here?”

“Well, she wasn’t at her actual house, so she must be here.”

They’d gone to her home? They knew where she lived, not just her father’s address?

“Do you think this qualifies as stalking?”

Following a stranger home, terrorizing her by playing mind games, and forcing her to endure an hour of tense silence while she awaited attack? Yes, stalking and beyond.

“Well, we needed to call Wayne for this address and then blackmailed him for it so…yeah. I’d say stalking is a check.”

They’d called Wayne? Her lawyer was in on it? The dirty bastard.

“Lore?” a voice called, somewhat familiar. “Lore, sweetheart, are you home?”

A series of knocks on the front door. “It’s Nolan and Kieran, Lore. Open up if you’re home. We’re worried about you.”

Something clicked inside her mind, moving past the intensely psychotic and paranoid part of her brain that was currently in control. Kieran and Nolan weren’t criminal masterminds, and Wayne would never give away any of her personal information. She looked at the tightly gripped gun, and panic of a different kind took hold. She was stunned by what could have happened if they had let themselves in. Fuck, had she even locked the damn door? She could have shot them! What was wrong with her?

Lore flicked the safety on and stored the gun in its hidden compartment beneath the desk drawer, sliding it back in place with a quick
snick
. She ran out of the office, her fear for what she could have done to the men driving her on, and flung the door open, her chest heaving as though she’d run a marathon. She knew it was an irrational fear that had been riding her for the past hour, but to her shame, she had let it control her completely.

“Lore!” Kieran said after the initial shock of the abrupt greeting. The men both smiled, relief clearly painting their expressive faces. But those faces fell as they got a better look at her distraught state. She didn’t want that. She wanted them to go. Yes, her paranoia was bordering on hysteria, but she would bet a large settlement that someone had followed her. And that note was not imaginary, damn it.

She was about to tell them to go when Kieran stepped forward, cradling her face in his hands so gently. She hated to appear weak. She was feeling fragile enough without the temptation of leaning on him for help. She didn’t need their help. She was doing just fine on her own.

“Have you been crying?” His thumb swiped against her cheek as if clearing away a tear.

She pulled back, shaking her head and getting her shit together. This wasn’t who she was. One night with a couple of men she just happened to be attracted to didn’t mean she forgot everything she’d worked so hard to build for herself. “I’m fine. I told you I needed to cancel our dinner tonight. That did not require a checkup.”

“Lore,” Nolan said, his tone coated in admonishment. “You told Kieran you needed legal advice. So yes, we came to check on you. Deal with it.”

Oh, no, he didn’t. “Deal with it?”

“Yes.”

“Just like that I’m supposed to let you run my life because you happened to give me an orgasm? Is that how relationships work in your little chauvinistic mind?”

“Enough.” Kieran stepped between them, one hand on Nolan’s chest, the other on her shoulder, holding them apart. Look at what they made her do, how they made her react. This was unacceptable. She was a fool to think she could allow herself to relax with them.

“I’m sorry if I made you think this was something more than—”

Kieran laughed, pulling her in tight to his body, and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. His free hand wove its way along Nolan’s waist. “You think I’m going to fall for that? You’re pissed. You’re upset for some reason that you
will
tell us about, so you’re reacting spontaneously and pushing us away. We’re not going to let you do that.”

“What’s his excuse?” She nodded toward Nolan, averting his eyes. She loved his passion, but she didn’t like when it was an angry passion centered on her.

“He is just a lunkhead who had an encounter with a woman he hates and is now taking out his ire on all other women.”

“Kieran…” Nolan started, looking surprised by his boyfriend’s frankness.

“It’s true. You do this every time Mia comes back into your life to make you miserable. She pisses you off, and for around a week you are rude and abrasive to every woman unfortunate enough to cross your path.” Kieran’s tone rapidly evolved from sympathetic and understanding to just fed up. It seemed he’d experienced this side of Nolan before and was less than impressed. “The rest of the time you’re whiny and self-loathing. It’s been years since that bitch hurt you, Nolan. You’re better than this.”

“I know, but it’s bigger this time. It’s—” He looked around, seeing they were still on the porch and speaking rather loudly. “Can we come in, please?”

“Sure,” Lore answered, gesturing them in after sensing how brittle Nolan’s emotions were. She’d had a rough evening, but he looked torn to pieces. She was wrong to use their storming over as an excuse to push them away and make her life easier. It wasn’t fair to any of them, herself included. But she’d be damned before she let them control her.

Lore led them to the living room, navigating around all the packing boxes, and sat on the end of the couch, having them join her there, Nolan in the middle. She took his hand and rubbed his palm, a gesture of forgiveness for his abrasive attitude on the porch. “What happened with your ex?”

He rubbed his eyes and then leaned his head back along the couch. “She threatened me.”

“What?” Kieran sat up, his Zen demeanor evaporating.

Nolan told them of his encounter with his dear ex-wife, Mia.

“There has to be an out,” Kieran argued, attempting to find the light in the miserable situation. “You’re a lawyer; think lawyerly thoughts.”

“Loopholes like these can take months to contest, and do I really want to face that evil bitch in a courtroom on a regular basis for months? No, I absolutely, unequivocally do not. I think I’m just gonna give her the money and move on.”

“But, Nolan, who’s to say she won’t ask for more after you capitulate on this matter? You can’t just give in. You need to fight back!” Nolan’s easy acquiescence seemed foreign to Lore, especially after her recent legal victory. Her gut reaction to fight and take the bitch down was something her father would have done, an idea that left her more than shaken. But this wasn’t about her, and she needed to brush the thought away for later examination. She’d let her troubled past come back to haunt her another night; this moment was for Nolan.

“Fight back?” Nolan laughed, shutting his eyes tight and shaking his head. “What should I do, challenge her to duel? It’s done. It’s over. I just wish she’d get out of my life once and for all. Every time I see her she reminds me of—” He cut himself off, his jaw ticking furiously from stress.

“Of what?” Lore asked, squeezing his hand, unfamiliar with this side of a man she usually saw as confident and dauntless.

He opened his eyes and set his hazel gaze on her, a melancholic dimness clouding their usual acuity. “Mia knew I was bisexual when we married. She told me she liked it, was turned on by it. One day she caught me looking at some gay porn, and I think the reality of the situation sort of hit her. Turns out she wasn’t as turned on by it as she thought. She changed her mind about me and the marriage and…” He trailed off again, looking back at Kieran in anguish.

“You don’t need to tell me, Nolan,” Lore said. “It’s okay to keep some things to yourself.”

“No,” Nolan said as he leaned forward and stroked her cheek with his knuckles. “That’s wrong, Lore. I like you; Kieran and I, we both do. We want to share ourselves with you, and to not share this major part of my life, something that continuously fucks with my head, would be like a lie of omission. I won’t do that.”

She got the somewhat heavy-handed hint. “I need time to adjust to this.” She gestured to all of them. “Please.”

“Of course.” Kieran was proving himself more patient than Nolan.

“Long story short, she outed me to my entire conservative family. They disowned me. She filed for divorce and got an abortion.” Nolan’s eyes darkened with pain, his jaw clenched so hard she could hear his teeth grinding.

“Oh, Nolan.” She hugged him, stroking his short hair. He clutched her sides, holding her close. “What a bitch.”

He laughed wearily. “Yeah. A big bitch. Worst part is I think the next two marriages were just me trying to pretend to be something I wasn’t. I was pretending so I could win back my family, and to embody an image I didn’t care about to begin with. It was all a lie until I met Kieran.”

“So you’re the white knight in this scenario?”

Kieran kissed Nolan on his head and with a sardonic smile said, “In a sense, but don’t let him fool you. Nolan did a lot of rescuing in his own way.” He and Nolan straightened to look up at her. “A story we shall leave for another time. Can you tell us a little of what’s bothering you?”

Lore considered showing them the note and telling them about the car, but then she’d have to tell them her own sob story. She didn’t want to see the looks of pity when she explained how cameras and newscasters had ruined her adolescence, how she’d become an outcast among kids she thought were her best friends. It was too soon for all that, and she had to consider the sad possibility that she might never be ready to tell them. Sometimes it was too bruising to even think about. For now she’d enjoy their company while it was still simple and easy.

“Not yet. Maybe one day.” A promise she didn’t know if she would be able to keep.

“Come home with us?” Nolan asked before Kieran could get a word in. “Just to sleep? I missed having you in my arms last night.”

She didn’t need to think twice before agreeing. They stopped at her place, picking up some clothes and toiletries for the evening, then set out for home in Nolan’s car.