A New Resolution (15 page)

“Gotcha,” Rocko said hesitantly, his gaze flicking between her and Denny. Her inner thoughts must have shown on her face, her control slipping whenever memories of her experience with the FBI sparked her anger. “Well”—he clapped his hand on Denny’s shoulder, steering him back toward the coffee shop—“see ya around.”

She waved politely, watching him look back at her with yet another wink before entering the coffee shop. His friend held the door open, waiting for the young Rocko to walk through. Before stepping into the shop, he looked back at her with a small smile, tipping his head as he had earlier. Lore felt a shiver race from the bottom of her spine up to the base of her neck, the ease she’d felt from seeing their comfort with each other replaced with a different feeling, one that reminded her of the cold snow from that New Year’s Eve seventeen years ago.

That man, Denny, he held himself high, his gaze taking in everything he saw and cataloging it in what was probably a very sharp mind. Like Rocko, no matter his attempts to appear the opposite, Denny wasn’t a fool. In fact, Denny reminded Lore of an FBI agent she had once spoken to as a kid. His overwhelming confidence had been a smug insult, something he lorded over her as her all too apparent nerves had raced over skin and made her sweat. He’d known she was at his mercy, unable to hold back her fear of what was happening to her family. The agent had loved every second of it, controlling her, twisting her mind with his words, making her think maybe she had been complicit in her father’s activity. He’d dug at her relentlessly, thinking she had seen something incriminating, something she’d buried deep inside her mind.

That encounter had messed her up more than the cameras following her to school, more than the subsequent shunning her mother experienced by the community, and more than her pariah status once the media frenzy died down. She would never forget that agent’s eyes as he bored into her soul, digging and prying for something that just wasn’t there.

An interview like that had only happened once, and it had been against the agent’s orders. There was an internal investigation done once her lawyer and a child psychologist had pried out of her frightened younger self what the man had said to make her so afraid. It apparently wasn’t the first time he’d gone against protocol to get a result, not giving a second thought to the moral lines he crossed to get it.

Once it had been made clear to her by the psychologist how inappropriately the man had behaved, and that in no way was she in the wrong, Lore relished in the justice of the internal investigation. She followed whatever news she could get her hands on and never forgot the whoop of joy she’d screamed into the night when she received the call from her lawyer, claiming the man had been fired and his badge taken away. It was a feeling she never forgot, along with the complete distrust she had of men in law enforcement, the FBI at the top of that list.

It wasn’t all of them she hated, just the ones with that look in their eyes. The look Denny had when he smiled down at her before following Rocko back into the coffee shop. It said he had knowledge and confidence, what could be an attractive feature on men like Kieran and Nolan, but was really something he used as a weapon.

As she sat in the car, she thought of the complete control the men had had over her body the previous night. She thought of how she’d given them that control of her own free will and how different it felt to have it taken away from her by force. Her fingers tightened around the leather of the steering wheel. The tense sound of creaking material felt like it was coming from within her mind instead of the wheel.

Kieran and Nolan were good men, solid and trustworthy. But something in her heart, that dark part that polluted the pure place she held them in, whispered not to trust them, not to give her heart to them completely.

She shook her head and groaned, annoyed that her perception of the world was constantly shaded with bad memories from her past, and since becoming more acquainted with the men, it seemed to be happening more often. Had opening herself up to the men allowed the darker, wilder part of herself to expand, become more insidious? Only time would tell, but she couldn’t go back to the way things were. Her resolve tightened as she shifted the car into drive. She wouldn’t go back.

Chapter Ten

The buzz from Nolan’s intercom shook him out of his deposition-reading stupor. He pressed the button, accidentally turning on the page system and causing massive amounts of ear-piercing feedback to echo throughout the office. Groans and yells of annoyance from his coworkers filtered through the walls. He winced, turned his phone off immediately, adjusted his volume, and turned the page system back on.

“Sorry, everyone. My bad.”

“You suck, Nolan,” Ned, one of the many lawyers at the firm, paged in response over the system. Nolan agreed: when it came to the phone system, he sucked.

“Nolan?” The door opened. His assistant, Nicolette, stood in the entrance with a shit-eating grin on her face.

“Yes, I know. I suck.”

“You do, yes. But you have a visitor, which is why I used the intercom to contact you in the first place before you gracefully turned our office into a circus.” Throughout her sarcastic speech, Nicolette held her hand in front of her chest and used her forefinger to point behind her. Her eyebrows were raised almost comically high, and her facial expression reminded him of a vampire about to take a bite. Oh, fuck. His first wife was in the waiting room. It was the expression Nicolette made whenever referring to his first ex-wife. What did he do to deserve this? He’d been riding his postdate bliss with pleasure, and now she had to come and ruin it.

“All right, my schedule is clear, so why don’t you send them in. Who is it?”

“It’s Mrs.—”

“Soon-to-be former Mrs. Edwards,” Mia said, shoving past Nicolette with a rudeness that seemed to come naturally nowadays. The woman had changed so drastically since their time together. It was hard to believe she was the same person.

Nolan stood to greet her politely, kissing her on the cheek and pulling out a chair for a woman he used to love wholeheartedly. That is before he realized what a crazy bitch she was.

“What can I do for you, Soon-to-be Former Mrs. Edwards?” As Nicolette left the room, he dropped all pretenses of civility. “What happened this time, Mia? Spend all his money? Screw every pool boy in a fifty-mile radius?”

She leaned forward, uncrossing her model-skinny legs. Christ, he used to find that fake-tit, tiny-waist thing a turn-on. Thank goodness for Kieran setting him straight and teaching him how to see and recognize real beauty. He’d been a pretty selfish asshole before his man had saved him from death by narcissism.

“That’s rich. You’ve been married almost as many times as I have, so drop the self-righteous bullshit.”

“Yes, but while I was doing it to genuinely find a person to spend the rest of my life with—granted in a misguided fashion—you have made an Olympic sport out of it. You here for a divorce counselor? Because I’ve got too much on my plate.”

“Please, after the last time and that shit settlement you got me? You think I want your annoying ass swindling me out of money?”

“The only one in our relationship who swindled was you. Tell me what the fuck you want, Mia, or so help me I will call security and have them escort you from the building.” He leaned forward, rested his palms flat on the desk, and grinned wolfishly. “Please, please make me call security. It will brighten my day.”

“You can’t,” she said with an equally evil grin. “I have a meeting with my new lawyer.”

Nolan sat back, a curdling feeling turning his gut into a whirlpool. Mia wouldn’t have gone to another lawyer without asking him first, not unless the suit she was filing was against him. “Which one of them did you fuck to get them to agree to your suit?”

“Ryan. Didn’t need to fuck him, though.”

“Blowjob?”

“Fuck you, Nolan.”

“What does this have to do with me? You have your new divorce lawyer, bitch. Go play with him and leave me in peace.”

Her eyes sparked. “Speaking of divorce, I was looking over our divorce agreement, you know, reminiscing about the past, when I came across an interesting little clause. If in ten years’ time I was not married, nor was I in a position of permanent employment, you would need to continue paying alimony.”

“You’ve been married four times since our divorce.”

“True, but I’m not married now. Or at least I won’t be after my divorce. I have no employment. I’m a helpless gal with no one to look after her. Would you really deny me the alimony you owe me? Alimony I’m sure you can spare with the earnings from your successful law firm and all.” Her slimy smile represented everything wicked and evil in the world that Nolan hated, and he wanted to sew her lips together so no one was ever on the receiving end of that grin again. He was amazed she didn’t start cackling like an evil witch.

“It will never hold up.”

“Here’s the deal, Nolan, baby—”

“Don’t call me that.”

“You either fork up fifty grand before my divorce goes through, which my dear new lawyer says will be very soon, or I take you to court.” She shrugged and stood, staring down at him. “Your choice. Have a good day…
baby
.”

He followed her toward the door as she left and slammed it behind her, punching his fist into the wall with an angry shout. Rubbing his pressure-filled eyes, he used the intercom to contact Nicolette and told her to cancel any meetings and hold all calls he had for the day, knowing he wouldn’t be good company for anyone to be around after that shitty blow.

The woman had well and truly destroyed any remaining joy from the previous evening, and he could feel that old and unwelcome self-doubt creeping back into his mind, a self-doubt only Kieran had been able to dispel. This time, however, he wasn’t too sure anyone would be able to beat down the dark cloud Mia had left behind.

* * * *

“Are you sure you want to cancel?” Kieran asked, kneeling in front of Nolan in their living room.

“I just won’t be good company for her right now. Hell, you should go out with her. I don’t even want to subject you to the fucking miserable shit I am at the moment.”

Kieran rubbed Nolan’s calves and rested his head on his lover’s thigh. The guy was wrecked, that bitch pulling every negative and toxic emotion from their past relationship to the fore of Nolan’s mind, shredding his confidence once again. Kieran could kill her for the pain she’d caused Nolan over the years. Of all Nolan’s three ex-wives, this bitch was always the worst, the most vindictive. The other women let Nolan go and had moved on with their lives, but Mia? It was like she blamed him for every relationship gone wrong in her life. What was worse? It was the damn bitch’s fault that their marriage had ended, as she was the one who had cheated on Nolan, over and over.

“I think Lore will make you feel better, baby.”

“Don’t call me that right now. I can just hear her slimy voice saying that word, tainting it.” Nolan stood, grabbing the full bottle of whiskey from the end table. “I’m gonna drink myself silly and go to bed. Go hang out with her, please. I want you to. I just need to be alone.”

Kieran rose, watching Nolan drag himself up the stairs and into their bedroom, feeling terrible that he had this new headache to deal with concerning Mia. But Kieran was also sure Lore could make Nolan feel better. There was nothing like the scent or feel of a woman cuddled around a man, lavishing him with love and attention when he’d had a shit day, to make him feel better.

His cell rang. “Hello?” he asked without looking at the caller ID.

“Hello, Kieran,” Lore responded, her usually husky voice sounding tinny over the bad reception.

“Hey, sexy lady.” He sighed, not wanting to cancel with her but knowing he needed to give Nolan his full attention that night.

“Kieran, I’m terribly sorry to do this, but I have to cancel our plans for this evening. Something has…come up.”

His worry peaked, sensing it wasn’t just the connection distorting her voice. “It wasn’t something we did, right, Lore? You’re okay from the other evening?”

“Oh, yes, I’m fine. The other night was…more than I could have hoped for. You’re both wonderful. And rather satisfying.”

Kieran snorted, rubbing his hands through his messy hair in relief. At least that was one thing he didn’t need to worry about. She sounded honest enough, if a little stressed-out. “Great. Good.” He rolled his eyes at his eloquence. “Ya know, to be completely honest I was about to call you to reschedule our date for tonight.”

“Oh?”

“Nolan isn’t doing too well. He had a run in with enemy
numero uno
.”

“I’m sorry, who?”

“His first ex-wife, Mia. Woman is the queen bitch of bitches.”

“First ex-wife? He has more than one?”

“Yeah…the love-crazed man has three ex-wives. But that really isn’t my story to tell.” Kieran sat on the bottom step, itching to go up the stairs and comfort Nolan but wanting to stay on the line with Lore at the same time.

“Of course. Do you think he’ll be in to work tomorrow? I was thinking about coming to see him. I know Mr. Iver is technically my lawyer, but I would like Nolan’s opinion on something. If he can’t see me tomorrow—if he’s ill or something—it’s not a big deal. It doesn’t matter.”

Something was definitely wrong; he’d never heard her sound so scattered before. “Why do you need a lawyer’s opinion on something, Lore? Did something happen involving your shit old boss?”

“No. Nothing like that,” she said quickly. Lore took a deep breath before continuing. “I’m fine. I just have some old papers my father left me in his will, and I wanted Nolan’s thoughts on the matter. But you know what? It was a silly idea. I don’t need to deal with them just yet anyway, and I’m sure you and Kieran would like some time to yourselves after dealing with Enemy Numero Uno. I’ll talk to you at some point in the future. Good evening.” She hung up before he could get another word in.

“At some point in the future?” he repeated, staring at the phone as if it had spoken the offending words itself. He could see Nolan wasn’t the only one who needed some emotional healing. But first, he’d give Nolan something else to focus on before tackling the scars left by the Mia encounter.