A Heart Renewed (11 page)

After the sun set, many of the freight drivers, or teamsters as they were called, set up crates to play cards and drink whiskey.  Exhaustion already pulled at Adam, so he set up the tent.  When he unrolled it, he found the previous driver’s bedroll, so he took one of those blankets and rigged up a divider down the middle of the tent.  Julia was sitting nearby staring at the toe of her boot as if it were the most interesting thing she had ever seen.

“I have the tent set up.  I would like to retire, if you don’t mind.”  Then leaning closer so only she could hear, he added, “I have a divider up as well.”

She nodded before getting her bedroll.

Julia entered the tent.  She should be upset that she had to share a tent with an unmarried man who was not related to her.  She should be concerned about what would happen to her reputation should someone find out that she was not really Adam’s sister.  But she didn’t care.  She was already ruined.  What more could society say to her?

Laying out her bedroll on one side of the divider, she heard Adam doing the same on the other side.  At least the divider was not see-through.

“Good night, Julia,” he said before what sounded like rolling over on his side.

She knew she treated him poorly since they left Texas.  She had been short with him—when she didn’t ignore him completely.  She was grateful for his help, but found it impossible to move beyond what Reuben did to her.  It consumed her thoughts to the point that she had nothing left to give to Adam, not even politeness or common courtesy.  A little nudge of guilt infiltrated her thoughts.  Perhaps she should make some effort to be pleasant to him even though she felt dead inside.

Clearing her throat, she responded stiffly, “Good night, Adam.”

She could not close her eyes or try to sleep.  Every time she tried, she saw Reuben’s face inches from hers.  She felt the weight of his body on her, crushing the air from her lungs.  She felt him ruin her.

It made her sick.  It scared her.  What if he found her?  Would he subject her to such torture again?  A sob escaped her lips before she could stop it. 

Rolling onto her side, she cried.

How could God let this happen?  She thought he loved her?  She thought he protected his children?  It would have been better to kill her that night than to allow her to suffer day after day remembering what Reuben did to her.

The bitterness took firmer hold of her heart.

The sounds around camp eventually died down as all of the teamsters retired.  Still Julia was awake.  She turned her head into her blanket to hide the sound of her sobs.  She would never be… Be what?  Be a wife?  Be a mother? Be pure again?

Slowly, exhaustion won and she slept.

Again, Adam thought he heard Julia sobbing.  The thin blanket acting as a divider between them was not enough to muffle the distinct sound.  He could tell she was trying to disguise it, but she couldn’t.  His heart ached for her.  He wanted so much to pull back the divider and just hold her in his arms, to rock her back and forth like he had that first night. 
Lord, I can’t comfort her, but you can.  Wrap her in your love.  Comfort her in her pain.

Gideon Bates stood, stretching his sore back.  This vantage point would let him see a wagon train coming into town and follow its movements without being detected.

After getting his orders from Reuben, he delayed leaving Texas for a few days to gather information about where Larson might be.  He had no desire to take off north based solely on the tracks heading out that way from Larson’s ranch.

What he discovered convinced him the delay had been a wise decision.  Turns out Larson was supposed to be leaving—just not on the night that he did, but rather a few days later—to take a job with Will Colter in the Arizona Territory.  Very suspicious that he should leave in a hurry without the provisions he had been stocking.  Only thing that made sense was that he had Julia Colter with him.

Learning the connection Larson had with Will Colter proved to be valuable.  It provided the basis for the plan Gideon set into motion.  Instead of trying to chase their tracks on a roundabout route and risk not catching up with them, he decided to head straight for Santa Fe.  They had to pass through here to get to the Arizona Territory.  They would be traveling with a wagon train—for he was positive Larson wasn’t stupid enough to travel alone for long.

When they came, he would be waiting.  Then maybe he could get some of that back pay from Reuben.  It never set well with him, doing hard work and not seeing pay for months on end.  That had never been his agreement with Reuben.  He was supposed to get paid monthly.  If he played his cards right in his present situation, he would get enough to make up for it.

Nine days later, the freight wagons arrived at Fort Union, New Mexico.  The trip between Cimarron Crossing and Fort Union was not an easy one, not that Adam had any previous experience to compare it to.  When they ran out of water yesterday morning, he was glad to know they would press on to Fort Union with as few stops as possible.  The first thing each man did was refill the water barrels, drink their fill, and water the animals.

Once camp was made, Julia approached him.  Hand on her hip, and fire in her eyes, she asked, “Does Will know we’re coming?”

The question caught him off guard, as did the manner in which it was delivered.  “He is aware that I am coming,” Adam answered trying to keep the irritation from his tone.  “Though, I never confirmed my departure since we left in a hurry.”

“Perhaps,” she said, dropping her hand to her side as she softened her tone, “I will write to him and post it from here before we leave.”

“I will do the same, since I should have already sent him some word.”

She nodded curtly and left.

Adam blew out a frustrated sigh.  He understood that she was hurting, but he was tired of being the object of her wrath.  The whole way from Cimarron Crossing to Fort Union had been tense.  He tried to set her at ease and anticipate her needs.  No matter what he did, she still looked on him with anger in her eyes.

Within minutes, Julia returned with a few sheets of paper.  Thrusting them in his direction, she held out a pencil with her other hand.  Obviously, she expected him to write his letter first.  Taking the offered items, he turned without a word.  Once he found a place to sit, he began composing the letter, debating just how much he should say surrounding his untimely departure.

Dear Mr. Colter,

I apologize for the delay in returning your correspondence.  An urgent matter required my immediate attention.  However, I wanted to let you know that I am already on my way and hope this arrives before I do.

Adam stopped.  Should he mention that Julia was with him?  Would she say something?  To be safe, he added a quick sentence that she was with him—nothing about the reason behind it—then signed his name.

When Adam returned her pencil, Julia composed a brief note to Will.  She stared at the blank page for several minutes wondering how to begin.  Most of what she wanted to say, she did not think she could say even in person much less a letter.  Deciding to stick to the facts and keep it brief, she wrote:

Dearest Will,

I am on my way to the Arizona Territory.  The situation in Texas has changed for the worse and I find myself in need of a new home.  I am hoping that you will welcome me once I arrive.  Fear not for my safety on this trip, as Adam Larson has taken it upon himself to see I arrive unharmed.

Your sister,

Julia Colter

She snorted as she wrote the word “unharmed.”  She was harmed, before she even left.  And she doubted whether she would ever be anything else again.  Sealing the letter, she stood and delivered it to an officer who agreed to take it with the military mail.  Now, at least Will has a chance to get a warning of her arrival.

Chapter 8

Santa Fe, New Mexico

September 24, 1864

Two days later, the freight wagon train arrived at their destination.  When Adam said his farewells to Chauncey, he was surprised when he handed him several paper bills.  He said that both he and his sister did such fine work that he felt he owed them at least a little bit of money.  Stunned, Adam thanked him before leaving.

Now that they were back down to two horses, saddle bags, and bedrolls, Adam was thinking through how to get them the rest of the way to the Arizona Territory.  He really needed a wagon and a team of oxen.  They also needed a tent, of which they would not be sharing.  He would sleep in the tent and Julia would sleep in the wagon.  They needed food, water barrels, and more.  From what Chauncey said, they were probably another month or so out from Prescott.

He and Julia made their way from the plaza where Chauncey was selling his wares to the western edge of town.  There he found a wagon train that had been waiting for Indian activity to settle down before departing for points west.  Speaking with the wagon master, Adam discovered they were going to roll out in two days.  He had to get started now if he was going to secure the necessary supplies.