A Geek Girl's Guide to Arsenic (11 page)

He gathered dark eyebrows over his nose and huffed until I thought I smelled smoke. “It was a stakeout. What kind of crappy marshal do you think I am? You think I just walked off and left the house unlocked? We were waiting to catch Bennie’s guys snooping for evidence John might’ve had in his possession.”

“Oh.” I adjusted my skirt across my thighs. “I see.”

“I doubt it.” He rubbed heavy hands over his face. “I didn’t mean to yell. I shouldn’t have.” He dropped fists lightly onto the table. “Stay out of this, Mia. I mean it. You could’ve run into a much bigger problem today than a couple of marshals.”

“You were waiting for Bennie’s guys, not Bennie. Is that because he’s still staying away from this or has something changed? With John unable to testify, it seems like Bennie could come if he wanted.”

“The family’s not stupid or reckless. They’d send goons to do their work.”

The inconsistency plucked at me. “You did it again. I said Bennie, you said ‘the family.’ What happened to Bennie?” I lowered my voice. “Is he sleeping with the fishes?”

Jake smirked but quickly hid it away. “We learned Bennie had a stroke two years back. His sons and grandsons have been running the show. They’re not new to this life, and they wouldn’t come in person either.”

“Interesting. I bet things are running smoother now than when Bennie was in charge. New minds for new problems. The same thing happens to big companies. The old guys who started the business lose their market footing and blame the economy, but as soon as they retire and people half their age take over, money’s back in the game. I imagine Jersey mob life isn’t much different. It can’t be what it was in the pre-internet years.”

“You’re not wrong. The sons are cleaning things up. They’re still criminals, but they’ve streamlined. It’s strictly high-end laundering these days.”

“See? Streamlining. I’m not in any danger. No one’s coming down from Jersey to break my legs or burn down John’s house. He’s dead. Bennie’s free to live the rest of his impaired life at home. I just wanted answers for why he’s dead, and if I’m being honest, I don’t think it has anything to do with Bennie.”

Jake grimaced. “I think you’re probably right, but it’s better to be safe.”

I grabbed the water and tossed it palm to palm, reasoning through the new information. “If you agree, then why are you staking out his place? Who on earth would want to go in there?”

He rocked back in his chair, exasperated. “Gee. I don’t know. Someone not too bright, I guess.”

“Have you heard from the ME yet? What kind of poison killed John?”

“Mia Connors.” A familiar-looking man in a five-thousand-dollar suit and a watch I could retire on stood inside the doorway. “Don’t say anything else.”

He handed his card to Jake. “I’m Marvin Merkin, Miss Connors’s attorney. Since she’s not under arrest, she’s leaving now. Nathan Green is coming, too.”

I hustled to his side, utterly relieved. “Look at that! Merkin the Magnificent is my new lawyer.”

Chapter Thirteen

I was late to work the next day, despite living close enough to throw a stone and hit my office. Thanks to the unfortunate butter incident, I was out of genteel lady ensembles suitable for Pioneer Days, so I had to get creative with the contents of my costume trunk and skip my trip to Dream Bean before work. I’d check on the Lindseys and Kubickas later. Meanwhile, my head pounded from two nights without sleep and a long evening of interrogations. First by the marshals and then my grandmother. There honestly wasn’t enough coffee in the world to reanimate me, but a girl has got to try.

I stopped at the concierge desk and patted the tabletop blindly in search of my precious. I shoved the largest to-go cup under the caffeinated coffee pump and flipped the glorious spout open. A few sips later, I felt more like myself.

Sunlight twinkled through floor-to-ceiling windows on either side of the clubhouse foyer, inviting the outdoors in and enhancing the rustic commune-with-nature vibe the community adored. Dust motes twinkled in the air over a giant inlaid compass on the marble foyer floor. I smoothed wild hair behind both ears and tucked it neatly into my white bonnet.

Marcella sashayed in my direction with a giant smile and a crisp white clipboard pressed to her chest.

“Morning, Mia.” She tapped crimson nails on the counter. Her thick Latina accent made everything sound wonderful. She was in charge of public relations for the community, so she basically had a degree in how to manage people. “Where’s your gorgeous costume from yesterday? I loved the hoop skirt.”

“It’s at the dry cleaner.”

“This outfit is cute. Are you a pilgrim?”

I forced a congenial smile and pointed to the red letter on my chest. “Hester Prynne.” I sipped liquid energy and motored away from the desk to barricade myself in my office until lunchtime. I pulled the door shut and relaxed into my chair.

My phone buzzed to life with an incoming video call from Nate. I propped the phone against my laptop while I booted it up.

Nate’s face appeared on the screen. Twinkling green eyes and bushy red hair, way too happy before my coffee. “Hey! How’s it going? TGIF, right?”

“Right.” The weekend was upon me. John had been murdered two days ago, and I wasn’t any closer to finding the killer than I was before Jake told me it was murder. In fact, my suspect pool had quadrupled, which seemed the opposite of progress. Angry girlfriends and mobsters, money problems, who knew what I hadn’t uncovered yet.

“Have you heard from Jake since we left the station last night?”

“Nope.”

Nate leaned close to the screen. “Do you have any theories about John, yet? Did you find what you were looking for while we were there? Do you think the marshals are still watching? We could go back. Now that we know they’re out there, we can be stealthier about it.”

I smiled, imagining Nate as stealthy. “Like what? Ninjas?”

He made weird chopping hand movements. “Exactly.”

“You’re like eight feet tall. I think you can prune ninja from your list of potential professions.”

He kicked back in his seat and locked long fingers behind his head. His office came into view. A white board covered in nonsense, probably math, peeked above his head in the background. “Fine. It doesn’t come with dental anyway. How’s the new temp working out?”

My tummy curled. “I completely forgot about the temp.” I checked the calendar on my computer and the time on my screen. “She’ll be here in a couple hours. You want to meet me for lunch? It’s Pioneer Days.”

“Ah. Fresh ears of corn, kabobs of unnamed animal chunks, tiny chickens on a spit. Not today. I have a date with Kenna.”

“You have a second date? That’s not like you.”

“I didn’t get a first date. Your boyfriend tagged along.”

I bit back an objection to him calling Jake my boyfriend. Clearly, it was Nate’s intention to irritate me. I smiled. “Well, have a nice time and call me after.” I reached for my screen to disconnect the call.

“Wait!” Nate jumped forward. “Wait. Hey. What do you think about the apothecary for John’s killer? The blacksmith’s daughter, what’s her name?”

“Adele.”

“She said they had a thing. The apothecary shop was closed all day after he died. Maybe she’s guilty and making a run for the border.”

“Mexico is kind of a haul from Northeast Ohio. I think we can relax.”

“Canada, goofy.”

“Whatever. She’s on the list, but I’d like to meet her before drawing any conclusions.”

“When you talk to her, keep a couple things in mind.” He lifted fingers to tick off his list and blocked half his face from the tiny screen. “An apothecary has knowledge of poisons. This apothecary had intimate access to John. If she was like the others, she was tired of the infidelity. Means, motive and opportunity.”

“I’ll visit her shop before I get started at the booth this afternoon, but she’s not a real apothecary any more than I’m Guinevere, Queen of Camelot. She might not have the first clue about poison.”

“Booth? Do you mean the wagons you rented?”

“Yes. Not that we need them. Sales are dismal. We did a thousand dollars less yesterday than the same day last year.” Which reminded me I hadn’t heard back from Petal at Earth Hugger. “I’ve got to get public opinion turned around before we go under. I seriously hate opportunist reporters. Mindy Kinley made this so much worse than it had to be.”

Nate gave me a limp smile. “If anyone can fix this, you can. Keep me posted on the apothecary. I’ll let you know about Kenna.”

He wiggled his eyebrows again, so I hung up.

I placed another call to Petal. This time her assistant put the call through...to voicemail. I left a message and focused on my day job. With everyone outside enjoying Pioneer Days, there was little to do in the office. My inbox was clear by noon. I had no research cases waiting on me. By one, I needed fresh coffee, something to eat and a good stretch.

I opened my door and squeaked.

Marcella and a fashion model wearing a bright pink minidress stood outside the door. Marcella lowered her hand. “I was just going to knock. Mia Connors, this is Fiona Wise.”

The young woman’s mouth fell open. Her wide-eyed expression startled me. She smoothed long, poker-straight platinum locks over each shoulder. “Call me Fifi. Fiona’s my grandmother.” Fifi gave me an exam from head to toe.

I stepped back to take in her perfect coed figure and adorable shoes. Fiona was an old lady’s name and part of the reason I’d chosen her from the pile of temp applicants. “Nice to meet you.” The words warbled on my tongue.

Marcella wrinkled her nose. “Can we come in?”

“Oh.” I stepped aside and let them pass.

“This is the IT office for Horseshoe Falls,” Marcella explained. “Mia spends most of her time here, unless there’s an issue on a home PC, then she makes a house call.”

Fifi seemed to recover from her initial shock. “Awesome.”

Marcella swallowed a chuckle. “Indeed. I’ll let you two do your thing.” She did a little wave and ducked out, pulling the door closed behind her.

Awesome.
Being alone in the office with her made me uncomfortable for no good reason. “I was just on my way to get something for lunch. Would you like to come with me?”

“No.” Fifi shook her head purposefully. “I don’t eat lunch. Is there something I can do while you’re gone?”

I looked at the empty desk beside mine. Unease slipped up my spine. “You can stay and get acclimated, I guess. There’s a notecard beside the keyboard with generic passwords for your email and employee intranet. Are you sure you don’t want to come along? I can show you around the community.”

She looked hesitant. “Okay, I guess, but don’t you want me to get to work?”

“I think better with food.” Besides, I wasn’t ready to hand over the keys to my castle just yet. Until I got to know her, those generic passwords and supervised desk time were all she could have. “It’s the perfect time to see Horseshoe Falls. You can come with me to get some food and we’ll check out your skills when we get back, figure out which tasks you can take over.”

She nodded sweetly. “Okay. Sounds like a plan.”

She sounded surprisingly annoyed, which made me wonder if she had an angle.

I led her to the foyer and pointed out a bunch of things she could see for herself. “Derby is the restaurant. There’s the salon. The Spa. Gym. Groomers. Pro shop.”

What was I thinking? Volunteering a private tour? Small talk and new people were my kryptonite. I’d jumped headlong into both. “Staff offices are in the hallway with IT. Conference rooms are there, too. Out back you’ll find the tennis courts, pools and café. There’s no smoking here. We recycle or repurpose everything, and we walk or take a golf cart when we leave the clubhouse for a destination inside the community.”

Fifi watched patrons and staff with suspicious eyes. “Do I have to dress like an early settler? Is there a uniform or dress code?” She pulled in a sharp breath. “Is this place...” She hesitated. “Is this like a cult or something?”

I scanned the groups of people in period costumes. “No. We’re a community that values green living, limited carbon footprints and nature. This week is Pioneer Days. They do lots of neighborhood things together here. It’s all part of the charm.”

She blushed. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay. Don’t worry about it.” I headed for the front door.

She shuffled along behind me. “I didn’t mean to be rude. There’s nothing wrong with cults, if that’s what you’re into. I mean, it didn’t work out for me, but they found my trunk of shoes, so I had to choose, you know?”

I stopped in the parking lot for another look at Fifi. “I’m going to get a salad at the Dream Bean. Can you drive a golf cart?”

“I think. I’ve never tried.”

“I’ll show you. You drive and I’ll eat my salad. First I have to check on the shop owners. There was a bit of a brouhaha here yesterday.”

“Mia?” Fifi looked at me with concern in her eyes. “Thank you for giving me this opportunity. I don’t always fit in. Maybe I try too hard because I’m so accustomed to ruining things with people. Then new people see me trying too hard and push me away. Somewhere along the line it became a vicious cycle. I don’t know why.” She took a deep breath and shook her hands out at the wrists. “Sorry. I just thought maybe if you understood upfront how much I need this job to work out, maybe that would help.”

“Come on. I’ll buy you a water.”

* * *

A few hours later, Fifi and I’d had lunch, mingled with the residents, enjoyed a square dance and explored the community via employee golf cart. Much as I’d hoped for an old maid of an assistant, Fifi wasn’t bad. A terrible driver, but a nice enough person, and if she lost her mind like a former colleague of mine, I was almost certain I could take her down.

We stopped beside the waterfall where Tennille King, our resident photographer, had staged a number of sets from wine barrels and plastic grapes to rifles and—hopefully fake—animal skins. She threw her arms out like an airplane when she saw me. “Mia!”

I gave her an awkward one-armed hug and smiled. “You look perfect.”

She bounced her hip, jostling a line of feathers in her hair. “I’m a saloon girl.”

“I love it.”

Fifi cleared her throat and extended a hand to Tennille. “I’m Fifi, the new IT girl.”

Tennille’s blue eyes narrowed. “Why?”

“No.” I jumped in. “I’m not leaving. Fifi is filling Warren’s position, temporarily.”

Tennille trailed something in the distance with her gaze and smiled. “Well, Fifi, how about a photo with the waterfall?”

Fifi bounced onto a stump, hoisting an old musket against one narrow shoulder. She crossed her long legs and leaned into a pose. Apparently, this was not her first photoshoot.

“Nice.” Tennille settled in for a few dozen snaps.

I plotted a path back to work by way of my favorite dessert stands.

“This is interesting.” Jake sauntered to my side. He crossed grumpy arms and nodded at Fifi. “Where’d you find her?”

“She’s my new Warren.”

“Why are you dressed as Hester Prynne? She wasn’t a pioneer.”

“That depends on your definition of
pioneer
. Maybe colonists were the original pioneers.”

He sucked his teeth and stared. “No.”

I shot him a fake but cordial smile. “Did you stop by for some campfire chili or have you come to arrest me again?”

He made his usual cranky face. “I’ve never arrested you.”

“Came to haul me downtown for more threats and questions, then?”

“You had no business in that house.”

I lifted my palms. “And yet, you didn’t arrest me.”

He scrubbed both hands over his face. “I came to see how you are doing. You were pretty upset last night when you left.”

“When I left the police station? Gee. Do you think?”

“Hi, I’m Fifi.” A thin arm poked into view as she encroached on Jake’s personal space.

“Deputy US Marshal Archer,” Jake grouched at her.

Tennille bumped into my side. “How about a picture, Jake and Mia?” She grabbed our wrists and pulled us forward without waiting for a response. “Here.” She positioned Jake beside a small wooden fence and adjusted his fingers around the back of one slat. She moved me in front of his arm. “Look shocked, Mia, like a pinup girl.”

I made an O with my mouth and opened my big eyes.

“Perfect!”

She stuffed a pilgrim hat on Jake’s head, ignoring his protests, and placed his hands on his hips. Grouch pose. His usual. She put my hands in prayer pose and asked me to kneel before him as if begging forgiveness.

I knelt and bowed my head.

She moved behind me and snapped a round of shots.

Fifi roared with laughter.

“One more.” Tennille raced around, gathering props. She sat Jake on the bench and stood me beside him. “Put your foot on the bench by his hand, Mia, as if you’re going to tie your shoe.”

I obeyed. “But I’m wearing heels.”

She clucked her tongue. “And hose, not very pioneer-like of you. Look over your shoulder at me.”

I twisted at the waist, holding the pose. “Like that?”

“Yeah. Hold that. Hey, Mia? Are those panty hose or thigh highs?”