A Flower’s Shade (5 page)

Miss Yu seemed also to feel that she had gone too far, and, wiping the smile off her face, said, "On a day like this, how can you think of my marriage? Hmph, while my father was alive, no one cared a pin about it. And now that he's gone and left us so suddenly—now all of a sudden you all think it's an urgent matter."

All were dumbfounded. Seventh Grandfather could bear it no longer, he had reached the end of his tether. Miss Yu made a grave moue and asked acidly, "Seventh Grandfather, no half-measures, please. Just tell me straight out what kind of man I should look for." It was the sort of thing that a grown woman ought not to let pass her lips, but Miss Yu didn't seem to be concerned in the slightest, cutting right through the thin veneer of modesty. Obviously, as an old maid who had already sacrificed her youth, she had been sorely affected, and was forced take a mocking attitude towards all the piffling grave men present.

This painful scene in the Great Hall was finally succeeded by an almost glorious funeral feast. The necessity of Miss Yu's immediate marriage was to have been the major topic, but as soon as it came up, Miss Yu had half-seriously stifled the discussion. For a long moment, no one spoke. Miss Yu seemed to become a little impatient with waiting. She smiled frostily and said, "What, nothing to say? Well then, let's eat. If there's something you'd like to say, you can say it after dinner."

The dinner was an enormous banquet, with row after row of chairs prepared beneath the funeral canopy, a feast for the eyes. Men in gray robes were taking their seats, and beginning to down drinks. The Zhen Family women, all dressed in the weeds of mourning, were seated at two tables in an adjoining room.

A bevy of female house servants and maids shuttled back and forth.

Now that the men had begun to drink, they became more talkative. Already they began to forget the occasion, starting to play drinking games, growing raucous. The gentlemanly Fourth Uncle from Zhushan arose and respectfully toasted Seventh Grandfather. Far from refusing, Seventh Grandfather raised his glass, and emptying it in a gulp.

The women in the adjoining room were not about to be outdone. They rolled up their sleeves, lifted their cups, and gulped the liquor down. The old master himself had liked nothing less than senseless formality. He had never been one for grand ceremonies, and now that he had gone into the great beyond, there was of course even less reason to observe them.

Only Miss Yu and Naixiang remained in the mourning hall. The siblings were sitting side by side. Miss Yu turned towards her brother, sitting like a puppet in his wooden chair with his rigid, ridiculous expression. She was filled with disgust. The clamor of men and women drinking filled the room, wave after wave. Miss Yu suddenly rose and pushed the wheelchair to the door of the Great Hall, and then pushed the chair across the walkway. The wheelchair creaked and groaned as she pushed her brother, ghost-like, past table after table of drinking men.

These men were intent on their great bowls of liquor and large hunks of meat, and no one paid any attention to the wooden wheelchair grinding past them. Actually, some of them did notice, but so as not to dampen the mood, they pretended not to have seen anything. Many of the men who had come to attend the funeral, many of those who had rushed to the Estate, had really been motivated by a desire to fill their bellies at this mourning feast. The future of Zhen Estate was no concern of theirs.

A pack of children, having already finished their meal, were playing hide and seek on the raised floor. They were deeply absorbed in the game, scuttling under the floorboards and climbing out again, and all of them were covered head to toe in mud. A little boy with a snotty nose had just emerged from under the floorboards, when he suddenly climbed onto one of the long wooden boards, then scooted under the middle of the table where the men were drinking. In a flash, he emerged in front of the wheelchair Miss Yu was pushing. The little boy stared in stupefaction at the expression on Naixiang's face.

It was obvious that Naixiang's stiff grimace had frightened the boy. The boy stood there without moving a muscle, a string of snot dangling from his nose. When it seemed he was about to keel over, he suddenly exhaled, then drew breath in again. Miss Yu stared rudely at the boy, and the boy looked back at her without being awed. Miss Yu was a very pretty girl, and the boy did not seem to think her frightening.

Miss Yu pushed her brother into the adjoining room. It was brimming with noise, and the Zhen women were shouting and yelling for Suqin to drink, with the most strident demands coming from Peach Blossom.

"My lady, if you don't drink today, then how would any of us dare?"

Suqin raised her glass, but seemed uncertain what to say. She held the glass suspended in mid-air for a moment, then put it back down again. "On a day like today, it isn't permitted to drink." she said, rather reluctantly. Although Suqin, as the wife of the young master, was addressed as my lady, her position in the Estate held no importance, since her father-in-law and her husband had both disliked and ignored her.

Peach Blossom replied, "How can you say that? You only just said that in our Zhen Family everything was permitted, and then a moment later, you take it all back again."

Suqin said, "You can all drink. If you want to drink, then go ahead."

Peach Blossom's face immediately fell, and she said aggressively, "We do want to drink, but you are the lady of the Estate, lofty and anointed, you're our mistress. You won't drink. So how could we dare to, even if we wanted to?"

It was just then that Miss Yu reached the door to the adjoining room. Her sudden arrival caused the deafening room to suddenly go quiet. One could say that it may even have become too quiet, so that Peach Blossom's whisper, "Oh dear, it's the master and our young lady." was very conspicuous. Miss Yu's expression became disagreeable, and she looked at them wrathfully, her eyes brimming with intense displeasure. With the exception of Suqin, all of these women were the concubines of her father or her brother. Miss Yu had never harbored warm feelings for these concubines, and as soon as she saw them she was filled with profound disgust.

"Miss Yu, sister dear, sit down and have a bite to eat." Suqin called to Miss Yu.

Ai'ai hastened to rise and rush over to Naixiang. The care of Naixiang had always been her responsibility. She had forgotten about him in order to have some food herself, and now she seemed very frightened. Miss Yu seemed herself not to have heard Suqin's call, and remarked frostily to Ai'ai, "You go ahead, go on and eat your fill and drink your liquor." Miss Yu's words filled the honest Ai'ai with deep shame. Caught between a rock and a hard place, she stood there foolishly, watching Miss Yu make a chilly departure.

"She sure thinks she's something." mumbled Peach Blossom defiantly, who was famous for her acerbic tongue, "What's the big deal about her? Who even knows if any man will have her?"

Miss Yu did not hear Peach Blossom's remarks clearly, but she had heard the mumbling, and she knew also that she could hardly be saying anything pleasant.

Huaifu had long since left his table to make a rapid tour of the Estate. When he had seen everything, he popped back by the gates of the Great Hall. Miss Yu had already pushed Naixiang back to his original position, and brother and sister were once again sitting side by side. There wasn't another soul in the Great Hall, and Miss Yu and Naixiang sitting side by side produced an ineffable, gloomy atmosphere. Huaifu stole a glance at Miss Yu. To tell the truth, he had been secretly watching every one of her movements, and he couldn't figure out for the life of him why she wanted to be sitting numbly there now.

Miss Yu was scheming as she sat there, wondering how she ought to deal with the concubines her father and brother had left behind. Discovering Huaifu peering about, she waved at him, and gestured for him to approach. Huaifu didn't know what she wanted from him, and neared her gingerly.

She snarled, "Say, what are you snooping around here for?" This was an unexpected question, and Huaifu was entirely at a loss.

Miss Yu continued contemptuously, "Why don't you go have a drink, or don't you know how? The others are all boozing, what did you come in here for?"

Huaifu again blushed to the roots of his hair. Faced with Miss Yu, Huaifu almost instantly lost all his self-confidence. He stood there, helpless, like a puppet. When the clan had decided to send him to the Estate, Huaifu's first reaction had not been one of joy, but instead a dread that welled up from his innermost being. As soon as he thought of meeting Miss Yu again, his heart began instinctively to tremble. Although he was only a cousin to Miss Yu, according to the clansmen he was practically her closest relative. Or, to put it in other terms, they considered him to be the most appropriate choice to come live at the Estate.

Today marked the third time in his life that he had seen Miss Yu. He would remember the first two times until the day of his death. The first time Huaifu had seen Miss Yu, it was in the countryside, the occasion being that Miss Yu had come with her brother and his new bride to visit the family graves at Yaoshan. At that time Miss Yu had been a girl in the bloom of youth, decked out in a stunning dress, happily meandering along the raised border of the field.

Huaifu had been clearing away the weeds on an earthen slope, and had watched amazed as Miss Yu walked towards him in the light breeze. He had never before seen a town girl, let alone such a beautiful one, nor had he ever seen such a very gorgeous dress. He looked at Miss Yu foolishly, and because he was so absorbed in watching her, he failed even to notice that he was drooling, and that the drool was falling on his chest. Miss Yu came nearer and nearer until finally she reached the slope where Huaifu was standing. Fourth uncle from Zhushan was there, too, and when he saw Huaifu standing there like an imbecile, he had shouted at him to join them. Huaifu could no longer remember how his legs had carried him, but suddenly he was face-to-face with Miss Yu. Fourth uncle from Zhushan explained who his companions were, and told him to greet them immediately as kin. Huaifu had blushed and done as commanded, first shouting "Brother! Sister-in-law!" and then he turned his face, not knowing what to call Miss Yu.

"Don't be a fool, call her sister!" the uncle from had chuckled, looking at Naixiang and his bride, "Children who grow up in the countryside—they're all blockheads."

Huaifu swallowed, not daring to believe that it was right to call Miss Yu sister. Full of dread, he spoke the greeting: "Sister." As soon as the words had left his lips, he was worried that Miss Yu would be angry. Her anger would not have surprised him. She was like a fairy out of some tale, so how could she have such a degenerate brother? From that time on, an intense sense of inferiority had begun to gnaw at Huaifu's heart, for he felt that he could not live up to such a heavenly sister, there was no way he could ever live up to the honour. His family had no money and he had gone to school for only two years. His family name was also Zhen, and he was a close relative of Miss Yu, yet he knew that a profound gulf lay between them, he knew that they were as separate as heaven and earth.

As Huaifu was stealing a glance at Miss Yu, she, completely ignoring him, had turned away and was racing up the slope. The wildflowers were in bloom, and Miss Yu bent down to gather up a bouquet of them, shouting to her uncle, wanting to know what they were called. Fourth Uncle from Zhushan had laughed and told her the name, and gone on to tell them a story about the wildflowers. It was well-known local legend. Miss Yu had listened seriously, all ears until she had suddenly burst into laughter.

Huaifu, helplessly watching Miss Yu as she laughed a little distance away, now began to shake with foolish laughter. Miss Yu, having heard the story out, carried the substantial bouquet in both hands, beginning again to mount towards the crest of the slope. A violent gust of wind teased Miss Yu's long dress, and she turned around, holding the wildflowers high above her and shouting loudly. Huaifu felt as though Miss Yu was a kite about to be blown into the sky, and that he was holding the end of the kitestring.

Many years later, in the Zhen Estate's Great Hall, Huaifu and Miss Yu were alone together. In his mind's eye, he saw once again the first time he had laid eyes upon Miss Yu. Even though she was now very near, and he could have touched her by stretching out his hand, yet he still felt as though she were like a kite, high above him in the heavens. Perhaps Huaifu as a child had developed a fixed image of this cousin of fairy-like beauty, that she ought to be a floating kite, she ought always to be up in the sky, just as he would likely always be on earth. Despite the passage of time, Huaifu had never forgotten how Miss Yu had stood on that slope, her skirt and shirt billowing in the wind, as though she were about to be gusted up into the sky. White clouds in a blue sky, and Miss Yu high above, high above the earth, Miss Yu watching with proud contempt what went on, down below.

There were more people again in the Great Hall now, men who had eaten and drunk their fill, returning to their places. Those who had been seating before resumed their seats, those who had been standing still stood. Everyone had now fully experienced Miss Yu's intemperate behavior, but since there was still much to be discussed, the mourners hardly knew what the next step ought to be. Seventh Grandfather had drunk some liquor, was red in the face, and seemed a little tipsy. He was squinting at the men who were slowly making their way into the Great Hall. Finally they were all there.

"How about this: those of you whom it does not concern, you can be off, that's fine." Seventh Grandfather waved them off, speaking to those who had no seats and were obliged to stand quietly in the Great Hall.

"What's the rush? Even if there were a rush, there's no need to leave just because they're done eating." Miss Yu said arrogantly, and wholly artificially, "Since I make the decisions at the Estate now, very well, then, since lots of are people here, all the elders too, well, there's something I've decided."

The older Zhen clansmen looked at one another in befuddlement, unsure what Miss Yu was up to.