A Captivating Conundrum (44 page)

"Beth."

I looked down at my watch. "Damn! I am so far behind."

"You didn't finish the book last night?"

"Yeah. I mean the research for the other one. Came to me last night in a rush. You know me. Have to start." Standing up, I grabbed my purse from the counter.

"Where are you going?" Bobby asked.

"Out," I replied. "Got to get on it."

"Beth? What about the show?"

"That's hours from now." I laughed. "I'll be back, dear. No worries."

I could hear the sigh and my name as the door slammed behind me. I had to get out of there.

~ His ~

Waking up, I was so relaxed that my muscles didn't even feel like they were attached to my bones anymore. I looked out at the skyline, and stared at the empty chair just sitting by the corner of the bed. 

If there was one thing I would need to speak to my Beth about, it was the fact that I wanted her body right beside me when I opened my eyes in the morning…every morning, no matter what. 

I rolled over and took her pillow in my hands, breathing in the lavender scent and dreaming of the warmth that came from that amazing creature. It was like having one of those magnificent dreams that you know must be a dream because nothing real could possibly feel that good.

I wanted to stay in bed and rest, but I could hear the noises coming from the apartment. I could smell the coffee and the only mission I had was to run out, grab that woman, and bring her back to this bed with me to start the morning off just right.

As I opened the door, I was actually disgruntled when I saw Bobby's back at the table. Throwing on sweats, I walked into the living area. "Hey, man."

Bobby nodded. "Morning."

Grabbing some coffee, I went to sit down. I wondered why his face seemed more than a bit upset this morning. "Didn't sleep?"

"Early visitors."

I laughed, suddenly understanding the weary face. "Nicole was here already?"

"Nope."

I leaned my chair on its back legs and stared through the open door of Beth's office. Not a sound or shadow was visible. "Where's Beth?"

Bobby sighed. "She left. Said she had some work."

"Huh." My heart dropped a bit in my chest. "I thought she was done with the book."

"She is," Bobby replied in a short, clipped tone. "Something new."

I nodded. "Well, she said when the urge hit it hit and there was nothing she could do about it." I sent him a grin. "She said it's one of the things a guy would have to deal with if he was with her."

Bobby just sat and stared at me. A chilly feeling began to run down my spine. "Is Chris okay?"

"Chris is fine. Asleep."

"Okay. Did I do something wrong?"

"No." Bobby took a deep breath. "The visitors we had this morning were friends of yours. A guy named Chance and…"

I was shocked. "No way,
really
? That's cool of him. He never leaves California. How did he know to come here?" 

"Nic, probably. She sent him here."

"Oh, right." I kept studying Bobby's unreadable face. "Was he rude, or something?" I couldn't imagine my bud saying anything to upset Beth—well, unless he hit on her. But I really think even Chance would be more of a gentleman than that, considering how much he knew I cared for her.

"He wasn't alone," Bobby continued. "A woman named Rebecca was with him."

I swallowed the coffee quickly, burning my throat in the process. "Rebecca's here?"

"Yup. I suppose that's the chick you've been seeing…casually." Bobby's voice had a bit of a hard-edge.

I nodded. "That's right. I was going to break things off as soon as I spoke to her again." I paused. "What did she say?"

Bobby shrugged. "I wasn't here; I came out after they'd been here for a while, sitting and talking with Beth."

I closed my eyes as millions of different case scenarios ran through my head.

"Look, Matt," Bobby said, leaning forward. "Beth wasn't upset by her. She said that you have no commitment to her whatsoever, and you are certainly allowed to date whoever you want."

I felt the anger rise inside me. "Yes, I do have a commitment to Beth. I'm in love with her."

"I'm not the one you need to say that to!" He bit back, as any best friend would. "Beth is a chill woman, but you should know that she
will
step out of the picture if she thinks she's disturbing YOUR life. And, no, I don't get that part of her 'saintly' personality. Frankly, if the tables were turned and a boyfriend of Chris's just showed up here, I'd be throwing things by now. But Beth really DOES believe that you don't owe her a thing and that if you do the show tonight and then decide to walk away, that's your call."

"Then I guess she doesn't care as much as I do."

"If I didn't like you, I'd deck you right now." Bobby threatened through closed lips. 

"You just said—"

"Look!" Bobby pounded his fist on the table. "Beth is in love with you, ass. But she's not going to force you to do anything. And if your little Rebecca was kind and sweet and said she was in love with you and you were in love with her, well…"

"I'm not in love with Rebecca!"

"I know that, you know that and, considering the conniving look in her eye, Rebecca knows that. But I really don't think those are the people who need to know that, do you?"

Standing up, I felt the muscles in my chest constrict. This was so not how this 'special' day was supposed to go. "Do you know where she is?"

Thirty-Four

~ His ~

I never really thought much about the library. I mean, it's an amazing building and the lions guarding the steps are truly two of the most recognized figures in the world, but entering those large doors, seeing the amazing lights and tables, walking into the Rose Main Reading Room and staring up at that majestic mural—I could suddenly see why Beth felt absolutely at home here.

In this building she was surrounded by all the ones who'd gone before. Just like her own amazing mind, this building was filled with any and all information, data, stories, romances, fights, wars, drama, humor—everything that creative minds for generations have had the ability to write down on paper and share with the world. It was exactly the way I felt about my music, when I composed a work and stared down at a piece of paper hoping that the audience who heard my thoughts one day would fall in love with them like I had. That's how Beth must feel among her peers. Even though the tourists' 'oohs' and 'ahhs' could be heard throughout the grand space, there was a sense of privacy.

I walked around, just staring at everything, soaking in the peace and calm, and searching for that one figure I had to find.

A scattered few came up to me, spoke quietly about the show as they tried to respect their surroundings, and asked for an autograph. I obliged as best as I could. It was hard to 'do the job' when all I could think of was the fact that somewhere inside this architectural behemoth was the woman I needed to see so that the air could return to my lungs. 

I glanced out at Bobby, seeing him standing on the steps enjoying a New York City breakfast of hot dog and pretzel. I knew he'd stay there and wait for her just in case she escaped me once again. I also knew there were a great many exits in this structure, but Bobby said a ritual of hers was to always pass by Fortitude on her way out—one of the main stars of the series of books she wrote.

I wandered the first floor staring into every room, niche, crevice, nook, and sighed. This was going to be far harder than tracking someone down at a grocery store. But as I entered the Map rooms, there she was.

At one of the long, polished tables, Beth sat with her head resting on her hands as she stared down at the huge atlas before her. I leaned against the entrance and simply watched her, admiring the beauty that came with her thirst for knowledge. My heart was so full when I was around her. The glasses resting on the bridge of her small nose just made her all the more sexy, the librarian men saw in their fantasies.

I heard the frustrated cough behind me and moved aside. "Sorry about that."

The man gave me a curt nod as he rolled past a huge book on top of a cart, straight to the woman I wanted to see. Unloading it with a newfound smile, I watched Beth interact with the man, making him laugh with whatever wit and charm was coming out of her that she never seemed to work at to make appear.

When the gentleman turned back to me, the smile evaporated. I was actually wondering if he knew that I had upset the woman he was somehow already in love with. I looked down at the ground as his glare passed me by. All I could think about was how on earth I could turn back time and forget Rebecca even existed.

~ Hers ~

The smell of old texts is a mixture of time, use, and leather; it speaks of a long line of readers and researchers who were looking for answers. When it came to the new and you were the first to crack open that spine, the whiff of fresh ink and crisp, clean pages…well, the scent was perfect. I felt it to my core. Like a hockey player who says they love the smell of the ice, that's what books did for me.

I stared down at the atlas trying to decode the route I needed my characters to take in order to get to the treasure they were seeking. Along the route I looked for the most magnificent and historical places that throughout time became legends, even though they were based in a reality that none of us would ever have the power to see firsthand.

I sighed, trying to get my head on straight. This was ridiculous! I was trying to glean something absolutely phenomenal and decode a brand new adventure, yet all I could see in my mind's eye was a pretty woman who made me absolutely sick. A
model
? Of course, she was a model. After all, that was so much the stereotype of dating in Hollywood that it was almost a joke.
Hot actor dates hot model
.
Real shocker
. I shook my head. This was so not me. And, frankly, it was a me I really didn't like.

"Hey." I heard the whisper and turned around, staring over the top of my glasses at the one man I was really trying to avoid.

I sighed. "Hey."

He pointed at the chair across from me. "May I?"

I tried to shoot him a smile that I just didn't feel. "That's the beauty about public places, dear. You can sit wherever you want." My eyes fell back to my atlas, angry at myself for showing even the slightest sign of sarcasm.

Matt leaned forward and laid his hand on mine. "I'm sorry about your company this morning."

I looked up. "You don't have to apologize. Your friends are here to see you perform. I think that's nice."

"I apologize for Rebecca."

I sat back and pulled my hand from his, putting some much needed space between us. "Gotta stop you there. No apologies for Rebecca are required. She's someone who's a part of your life and I am not some ogre who's mad about that."

"But you need to know…"

"Seriously." I stopped him, trying to keep my voice quiet. "There's nothing I have to know. I understand that you two are dating off and on, nothing serious. Okay?"

Matt nodded.

"It really is no big deal. You and I only met like…yesterday, Matt. And we both had lives before ever setting eyes on one another." I said that part strongly, absolutely believing in the words coming out of my mouth.