A Beautiful Forever (11 page)

“She is, Agy. I really think she is.”

“Let me guess,” Andrea says, looking at me with squinting
eyes. “You took my advice and finally told Elliot you’re into him? Are you
dating now?”

I look at her briefly, trying to focus on cutting hair, but
just the thought of actually being with Elliot causes a smile to creep across
my lips. “Not exactly dating,  but things are good.”

“Hmmm, have you shagged him yet?”

I raise my eyebrows and look at her again as my client
watches us closely in the mirror.

“No, I haven’t ‘shagged’ him,” I answer, using my fingers as
quote marks.

“Just wondering,” she says before she turns back to her own
work.

I shake my head, smiling my way through the rest of the day.

Standing outside the hair salon waiting for Paige, I’m
suddenly filled with nerves. I only have six weeks left in the UK. I don’t want
to waste any more time pretending it’s ok to just be friends. I want more from
her, and I’m not going to let her push me away anymore. Every time I lay my
eyes on her the whole world just melts around me. She's all I can think about;
I need to be with her.

When she emerges from the salon, she’s with her boss,
Andrea, who gives me a little finger wave. “Hi Elliot,” she sing songs at me. I
smile and nod at her as I notice a look pass between them causing Paige’s face
to go bright red.

“Have you been talking about me today?” I ask, grinning at
her as she gets closer.

The answer she gives me is a coy smile, and a little shrug
of the shoulders.

“Have fun lovebirds,” Andrea calls to us as she walks
towards the station.

We both laugh as we say good bye and turn to walk in the
other direction. I take a risk and grab her hand as we start to move,
interlacing our fingers and giving her a gentle squeeze. I’m rewarded with a
smile and a body nudge as we walk quietly for a while, hand in hand, enjoying
our new closeness.

“So, Brian texted me earlier, he said everyone was heading
down to the Hole to get some dinner and have a few drinks, you up for it?” I
ask her.

“Of course,” she smiles, meeting my eyes. The attraction
between us buzzes through the air as it passes between us. We don’t say a lot,
we just walk together smiling stupidly. It’s hard to believe that something as
minor as a hand hold would make me so ridiculously happy, but it does.  

The moment we reach the door to our flat, I drop Elliot’s
hand, my disconnection causing him to look at me frowning.

“I feel kind of weird,” I explain.

“You feel weird?”

“I do - I’m sorry!” I grimace.

He sighs and lifts his hands to hold either side of my face.
His touch causing a light headedness to overcome me, I have to fight to keep my
eyes open, so I can focus on him.

“Paige – this is your one and only chance to back out. Once
we move things forward, I’m not willing to back off. It’s all or nothing Paige.
I can’t just be your friend anymore.”

His blue eyes are dark and serious, and I find myself
staring up and him and nodding helplessly. My head didn’t even consult me – it
just started moving all by itself.

“What does that even mean?” he smiles as he watches my
helpless nodding.

“Don’t back off,” I whisper.

“Then I won’t,” he says as he presses a kiss to my forehead
before releasing me to push open the door, holding it until I step inside
before him.

We remove our coats and hang them on the pegs by the door,
dropping my bag and his wallet and phone on the bookcase as we pass in to the
living area. 

As per usual, there are bodies draped all over the couches
and a mess all over the table. We say a quick hello to everyone, and I take a
look to see what they're watching on TV.

I laugh when I see it’s an Aussie soap called
Home &
Away.
“You might as well all be back in Australia!” I tell them.

“I don’t want to miss out on the happenings of Summer Bay,”
Naomi laughs without taking her eyes off the screen.

“But you’re going to be weeks behind anyway,” I point out.

Those watching, blow raspberries and wave me away laughing
good naturedly, as I go into the kitchen to grab a glass of water.

“They probably don’t even watch it at home,” I say with
amusement to Elliot as he follows meand leans against the bench top watching me
drink. I love the way he watches me, it feels like he’s caressing everywhere he
looks from across the small space.

We both turn to the front door as it opens and Shane walks
in with his girlfriend trailing behind him. “Hi,” she waves at me, I’ve met her
a couple of times, but I can’t for the life of me remember what her name is,
it’s some sort of flower, or tree…

“Hi Shane, Hi Coral,” Elliot greets seamlessly.

“Hey,” Shane says taking off his jacket and hanging it next
to ours. “How long til everyone’s ready to go?”

“They’re watching
Home & Away
so probably a good
15 minutes,” I tell him.

“Excellent, I’m busting for a dump.”

With wide eyes, we all grimace at each other after that
stellar revelation from Shane.

“Way too much information,” I laugh as he disappears down
the hallway towards the bathroom. I turn to his girlfriend, feeling the need to
change the subject. “So Coral, I don’t think you’ve ever told me how you and
Shane hooked up.”

“Oh,” she says, making a face. “Nothing exciting, we just
hooked up at the pub. I really liked his accent, so I was a pretty easy catch I
think.”

“He seems to like you a lot,” I offer. I'm shit at these
conversations.

Coral just shrugs her shoulders looking slightly
disheartened, I said the wrong thing – awesome. An uncomfortable silence
stretches out for what seems like forever before she shifts the conversation.

“How long have you two been together?” she asks looking from
me to Elliot.

“Oh… I… we’re…” I stammer, freaking out a little about qualifying
any sort of relationship at this early stage.

“We met on the plane over here,” Elliot puts in.

“Oh, you’ve been together a while then,” she comments.

“Seems that way doesn’t it?” I say eyeing Elliot, who’s
standing against the bench grinning while he finishes off my glass of water.

Redirecting her, I ask a few more questions about her life
while we wait, to be polite. She’s a little difficult to talk to, not wanting
to elaborate too much. It makes me wonder if that’s how I come across to
people, thinking that perhaps I need to make the effort to change that.

As we all walk towards the Hole, I decide to go bold this
time by putting my arm around her. When she slips her arm around my waist, I
breathe a slow sigh of relief, I didn’t even realise I was holding my breath
while I waited for a response.

When everyone else enters the pub, I hold her back and turn
to her as she smiles up at me, her cheeks and nose pink from the cold air, her
long hair sitting over her shoulders in the thick glossy curls she created for
work.

Looking up and smiling at me, those amber eyes of hers
search my face as she waits for me to tell her why we stopped.

Hooking my finger under her chin, I tilt her head up to mine
and lower my lips to hers, “Is this ok?” I ask quietly as my lips brush lightly
against her own. Nodding imperceptively, her eyes lock with mine as her tongue
slips out of her mouth to wet her lips.

Watching her, I feel so turned on right now I can barely see
straight. I want to crash my mouth into hers and carry her back to the flat
with me, but I restrain myself, slowly closing the last few millimetres of
distance between us. As our lips touch, I tease her mouth with mine, brushing
over her but not fully kissing her, testing if she wants me as much as I want
her.

When she moans and opens her mouth this surge of need for
her floods through my body, and I slide my tongue inside the warmth of her
mouth. Responding with equal intensity her mouth and tongue move with mine as
we take our time exploring all the crevices in each other’s mouths.

All too quickly, she hums and places her hand on my chest,
pushing me gently. I separate my mouth from hers and look at her questioningly,
all the while admiring the way her face appears right now. Her eyes soft, her
cheeks even more flushed than they were before, and her lips have progressed
from the pink they were before to almost red.

Clearing the huskiness in my throat, my voice is still
barely audible when I speak. “We’d better go inside,” I whisper, my head
swimming from the lust and desire that’s threatening to take over my body and
make me do things I could get arrested for in a public place. 

Elliot looks at me intently and nods his head before he hugs
me to his chest. I wish I could just fuse to him and stay there. This is now my
favourite place to be.

As we separate he holds my hand. “You ok?” he asks.

Nodding I smile, “I’m more than fine Elliot. I’m hungry
though,” I reply pulling on the collar of his jacket, “for a lot of things.”

His eyes darken with arousal as he starts to kiss me again,
I laugh into his mouth, enjoying myself immensely. “We can continue this
later,” I say pulling away. “Let’s eat first.” I’m not sure how or where we’re
going to continue this with a flat full of housemates, but I’m sure we’ll find
a way.

“Later then,” say as he leads me inside to join in with the
group.

The joining in part is fairly unsuccessful as we sit
together, talking quietly and touching regularly, it’s been so long since I’ve
let someone in my body space that I feel this burning need to touch and be
touched now.

There’s something about Elliot that makes me feel like I
could have a life free from my past, that maybe he’d understand. Although, deep
down, I know I should stay away from him. I shouldn’t be doing this. I
shouldn’t be giving either of us hope. I should never have even shaken his hand
on the plane, I should never have agreed to cut his hair, I should never have
agreed to live in the same flat. There're so many ‘should nevers’ at play here,
but I am trying to focus on what Naomi said about regrets a couple of weeks
ago. I don’t want to say good bye to Elliot in six weeks time and then spend
the rest of my life wondering ‘what if’.

“So what’s going on with you two?” Naomi prods from across
the table as we watches the change in Paige’s and my interactions.

“Yeah, have you two finally hooked up?” asks Brian.

“Haven’t they been together for weeks?” adds Coral.

“No, they’ve been dancing around each other,” Naomi
responds.

“Well?” we get asked, a host of expectant faces looking at
us.

As we glance at each other, I notice that Paige’s face is
bright red with embarrassment, so I answer for the both of us. “We’re just
moving forward. That's all for now,” I tell them.

“Well, forward is the right direction,” Naomi responds first
as she smiles broadly and gives Paige a wink. “It’s about time you both just
got on with it already.” 

We get a chorus of agreement from everyone, and dinner
continues on normally after that.  

As we all get up to leave, Brian informs us that he is
heading off to his girlfriend’s house. Paige and I immediately exchange
glances, both knowing that means we can be alone tonight.

Once on the street, Gavin claps his hands together. “So
who’s up for clubbing?”

Paige immediately shakes her head ‘no’, and I join in with
her refusal. Naomi, Shane and Coral all agree to go, parting from us with more
than a few knowing glances.

“Well, that was fun,” I say as we start the short walk home
trying to make small talk through my nerves.

“Mmm hmm,” Paige responds, leaning her head against my
shoulder as we walk arms entwined and hands interlaced, falling into an easy
quiet as we continue on our way.

There’s an entire zoo enclosure full of butterflies flying
about in my stomach right now. I know my time with Elliot is fleeting, so I
want to make the most of what time we have now. I want to give him what I can
of myself, while I can, I don’t want to fight this anymore.

As he closes the front door to the flat behind us, he takes
my hand and leads me through the kitchen, towards the couch. I plant my feet,
halting my movement as we reach the hallway leading to the bedrooms, and shake
my head when he looks at me before I brazenly lead him to his room.

Shutting the door behind him, he looks at me with raised
eyebrows, his fingers on the lock. I nod my head, shivering, as a skitter of
anticipation flits through my body when he spins it, giving us all the privacy
we need.

I take a nervous step back as he moves toward me, sliding
his hands around my waist as he pulls me against him. My head swimming with my
attraction, I breathe him in, luxuriating in the scent of him so close to me. I
glide my hands up over his well-muscled arms following them with my gaze until
I reach his shoulders, there I meet his eyes. The blue pools of perfect ocean
water look down upon me with such intensity that I feel lost in them.

“Are you sure this isn’t too fast?” he asks, his voice thick
and low, caressing my ears, sending shivers down my body.

“Well, we did meet on the plane,” I joke smiling as I rise
up on the tips of my toes to kiss him. As our mouths welcome each other, my
world explodes. His arms circle me tightly as I wrap my arms around his neck,
pressing myself against the hard planes of his body.

As our kisses become more frantic, he walks me towards the
bed, my knees collapsing as I fall backwards onto it. When he pauses to remove
his shirt, I watch in awe, gasping at the sight of him.

Pushing up on my elbows, I sit in front of him and reach
out, running my hands over his chest that I can only describe as amazing. My
mouth waters as my fingertips rise and fall, exploring each hard muscular bump.
Leaning forward, I press a kiss in the space between his abs and his pecs,
delighting as he slides his fingers into my hair and tips my head back to lean
down, kissing me once more.