You Are So Undead to Me (13 page)
“English is not the place for notes and stuff. Bring it up here. Immediately.”
Laughter tittered through the room again, and I blushed a shade of red I knew wasn’t cute. This was all Mom’s fault for depriving me of caffeine. If she’d let me have a cup of coffee before school, this never would have happened!
I closed the journal and hurried to the front of the room, feeling like I was back in the third grade getting in trouble for reading Princess Diaries novels instead of my stupid assigned reading. Pierce glared at me the entire way, her tiny brown eyes narrowed in her pudgy face. She looked like an evil mole, and not even the cutesy sweatshirts she wore could lessen the resemblance. The pink ENGLISH TEACHERS ARE ALWAYS WRITE shirt she had on today only brought out the sallow color of her skin, intensifying the “I spend most of my time underground” vibe.
“You may retrieve this after school.” She pressed her lips together as she snatched the book. “No more journaling or sleeping on my time, or you’ll be on your way to the office.”
“Sorry,” I said, then turned and fled back to my desk, doing my best not to look at anyone but Jess, who I could tell was totally commiserating with me.
Too bad I couldn’t say the same for the rest of my peers. Almost every girl in school had been a total witch to me today. They’d been jealous when I’d started getting attention from a hot senior, and jealousy had all too easily turned to loathing when I’d proved myself unworthy of that attention. It was shocking how fast the news of my new college “boyfriend” had spread, even to someone well aware of the workings of the CHS gossip machine.
Maybe once I told Ethan about my shunning today, he would be more willing to believe that the person raising the zombies had to be someone from my school.
Don’t even go there. You know it’s pointless.
I sighed and tried to look like I was riveted by Colin Danforth’s reading of
Macbeth
while letting my mind wander back to the problem at hand. My inner voice was right. Ethan would never believe me. He hadn’t even wanted to hear my list of possible suspects when he’d dropped by last night after his trip to SA headquarters. He hadn’t told me much, but from his bad attitude I guessed the Elders had laughed in his face when he suggested someone was raising the dead to keep me from going to homecoming.
Macbeth
while letting my mind wander back to the problem at hand. My inner voice was right. Ethan would never believe me. He hadn’t even wanted to hear my list of possible suspects when he’d dropped by last night after his trip to SA headquarters. He hadn’t told me much, but from his bad attitude I guessed the Elders had laughed in his face when he suggested someone was raising the dead to keep me from going to homecoming.
Which meant there was a lot more I didn’t know. Otherwise, even the Elders would see the logic of my argument. I was sure of it. They were old and out of touch, but most of them weren’t stupid. So that meant I was missing something. Something big.
But since I had no way of discovering what that something was, I’d decided to concentrate on what I
did
know. And I
knew
someone was trying to keep me from homecoming. If I could just figure out who that someone was, then I’d be closer to figuring out the bigger mystery.
did
know. And I
knew
someone was trying to keep me from homecoming. If I could just figure out who that someone was, then I’d be closer to figuring out the bigger mystery.
Now, maybe if I’d spent more time reading
Nancy Drew
as a kid instead of all the Princess Diaries books, I’d be prepared to get sleuthing.
Nancy Drew
as a kid instead of all the Princess Diaries books, I’d be prepared to get sleuthing.
As it was, I hadn’t gotten much further than a list of possible suspects. Monica was the biggie and would have been the
only
if there had ever been a documented case of a Settler raising the dead with the black arts. Apparently we were all such goody-goodies, we didn’t go there. I’d looked through every history book Mom had in the Closet and had found nothing, which was enough to make me branch out and look for other suspects.
only
if there had ever been a documented case of a Settler raising the dead with the black arts. Apparently we were all such goody-goodies, we didn’t go there. I’d looked through every history book Mom had in the Closet and had found nothing, which was enough to make me branch out and look for other suspects.
London was on my list simply because she’d been at both the corn maze and the dance studio when Ethan dropped the homecoming bomb. I couldn’t really think of any motive she would have for wanting me stuck at home, but there was a chance I wasn’t seeing the big picture.
Beth, Josh’s ex, was also on the list, despite the fact that she resembled a Barbie doll more than a voodoo practitioner and seemed to have the intelligence of a gnat. Black magic wasn’t easy stuff, and I doubted someone in remedial math would have the discipline to focus her mind and energy in the way you’d have to in order to work a summoning spell. Still, at least she had a motive—to punish me for going out with her man. A little thin, but a motive nonetheless.
I’d also added Beth’s little sister Annabelle to the list. She was in my grade and as different from Beth as Jack Skellington was from Island Princess Barbie. Annabelle was a super goth who had been arrested over the summer for putting sugar in the gas tanks of an entire lot of SUVs. She was a budding radical environmentalist and just all around . . . scary.
Of course, scary did not necessarily equal evil, and I couldn’t think of any motive for her, except maybe wanting revenge for Josh dumping her sister.
If only I had something else to go on!
The bell rang, signaling the end of fourth period. Thank. God. At least now I could get to the cafeteria and try to scrounge for some caffeine. I stuffed my copy of
Macbeth
in my bag and hurried to where Jess sat three rows back. Evil Pierce made us sit in alphabetical order. If she hadn’t, Jess would surely have found a way to prod me into wakefulness before I embarrassed myself.
Macbeth
in my bag and hurried to where Jess sat three rows back. Evil Pierce made us sit in alphabetical order. If she hadn’t, Jess would surely have found a way to prod me into wakefulness before I embarrassed myself.
“Hey, you need to stop by your locker before lunch?” I asked.
“Um, no . . . but I don’t think I’m going to lunch,” she said with a sigh. “I’ve got this killer test in biology, and I should probably hit the library.”
“I could help you. I took that test last year,” I said, not wanting to brave the cafeteria alone. So far I hadn’t seen Claire or Del, our usual lunch pals, but I was afraid they might be giving me the cold shoulder too.
“No, it’s okay. A few people are going to be there for a study group, so they’ll help.” Jess smiled and reached over to squeeze my hand as we followed everyone else out of the class. “Hey, don’t worry. I saw Claire, and she couldn’t believe everyone’s being so mean to you. She’ll help protect you during lunch.”
“Am I that obvious? God, I’m such a coward.” And I was. I’d only spent five minutes on the phone with Jess the night before because I couldn’t handle the amount of lying involved with explaining the whole Ethan situation. I’d given her the bare bones and that was it.
“No, not at all. I just know you.”
“What about Del, do you think she’ll be cool?” I asked, walking with Jess toward the library. “You know, I don’t think she’s at school today. She called me last night, all freaked out about something, but she wouldn’t tell me what it was.” Jess lowered her voice as we blended in with the crowd in the halls.
“Really?”
“Yeah, she’s been acting weird lately. I hope she and her dad aren’t fighting again.” Jess’s usually cheery face drooped.
Acting weird lately, huh? And maybe she was upset last night because her second attempt to kill my homecoming date had failed? I hated to suspect Del since she was basically a friend, but . . .
“I just wish she could see what a great person she is,” Jess said, making me feel even worse for adding Del to my list of suspects, “and not let it get to her so much when her dad freaks out.”
“Me too.” I put one arm around Jess’s shoulder and gave her a squeeze, feeling older for a second. Jess has always been shorter, but after my final growth spurt over the summer I had at least four inches on her. Jess had topped out at barely five feet and was super-tiny but was cool with being short. We’d always joked it would mean she’d be in the front of all the dance formations once we made the pom squad.
Man, I wished that was all I had to worry about. Just making the squad and homecoming and nothing else.
“See you in gym,” Jess said, heading down the steps to the library while I continued on to the cafeteria, trying to ignore the nasty looks I received from several girls I passed.
“What a difference a day makes,” I whispered, pasting a smile on my face.
I wasn’t going to let this get me down. I’d find out who was after me, dump my fake boyfriend, and everything could go back to normal. No matter how much a part of me would be thrilled to go to the dance with Ethan, I needed to live in reality. Ethan wasn’t real boyfriend material. Josh was. And since he wasn’t back at school yet, maybe I could convince him that the rumors about me and Ethan were all a big misunderstanding.
Positive thinking, that was what I needed. Too bad positive thinking was so very hard to pull off when you were fairly certain there was a killer on the loose—a killer who could be watching your every move, determined not to fail again.
CHAPTER 8
“Time for a review.” These were the first words out of Ethan’s mouth Sunday afternoon, making me fairly certain this Settler lesson would be as boring as Thursday, Friday, and Saturday’s sessions. “Let’s begin. To return.”
“Ethan, I know all the basic commands. Trust me, I actually have a very good memory when I put my—”
“To return,” he repeated, turning to walk deeper into the cemetery before I’d finished locking my bike to the metal gate.
Shepherd’s Hill was only a five-minute ride from my house, so I’d said I wouldn’t need Ethan to pick me up. I’d been allowed the brief respite from babysitting detail because the sun wouldn’t set until five thirty, long after our lesson would
hopefully
be over. Please. God. Then there might actually be time to enjoy a tiny portion of my weekend.
hopefully
be over. Please. God. Then there might actually be time to enjoy a tiny portion of my weekend.
Hanging with Ethan the past three days had been an exercise in boredom and frustration. He rarely spoke, except to grill me about second-stage material, and refused to teach me anything that might actually prove useful in defending myself or anyone else from Reanimated Corpses. Not that I was
quite
as worried about another attack since I’d made it known around school Friday afternoon I wasn’t going to homecoming because the cleaner had ruined my dress.
quite
as worried about another attack since I’d made it known around school Friday afternoon I wasn’t going to homecoming because the cleaner had ruined my dress.
This was a lie, of course, but I figured it was an excellent way to test my theory, which had been proven completely
right
so far!
right
so far!
Going to the dance = mad amounts of bloodthirsty zombies.
Not going to the dance = peace and tranquility.
At least for now. The longer I thought about it, the more certain I was that whoever tried to kill Josh and Ethan had something awful planned for homecoming this Friday night, something they didn’t want a zombie Settler present to observe. I didn’t have any real enemies—at least none who would want my date to homecoming dead—so it made sense that the attacks weren’t directed at who I was but rather
what
I was.
what
I was.
But then, that would mean an average person had discovered I was a Settler, which seemed unlikely since I hadn’t even been back on active Settling duty for that long.
More disturbingly, it meant whoever was raising these corpses knew I was a Settler because they were one too. Monica was looking more guilty with every passing second—not that it mattered, since everyone was intent on burying their heads in the sand and I still had no concrete evidence to share with Ethan.
“Hey, have you thought about what I said?” I asked, knowing I was flapping my lips in vain but heeding my conscience, which demanded I try to get through to him one more time. “That whatever’s happening might be an inside job?”
“To return,” he repeated, turning to face me once we reached the secluded clearing we’d been using for our classroom for the past few days. Thankfully, Indian summer was still going strong, so I hadn’t been freezing my ass off as well as having my brain numbed by boredom. “Really, Megan, you should know this one by now. I can’t believe you—”
“
Reverto,”
I snapped back at him, making no attempt to hide my crankiness. He was never going to break down and tell me anything about the ongoing Protocol investigation.
Reverto,”
I snapped back at him, making no attempt to hide my crankiness. He was never going to break down and tell me anything about the ongoing Protocol investigation.
He was too stubborn, pigheaded, obnoxious, cocky and . . . whoa . . . incredibly hot.
I tried to play it cool as Ethan stripped off his sweatshirt, revealing a skintight black tee underneath. I’d suspected he was built, but seeing the proof in all its honed, manly glory was still pretty freaking distracting. Jeez, why did he have to be so gorgeous? It would have been much easier to deal with being treated like a bratty little sister if he’d looked a little less yummy.
“To return to earth.”
“
Reverto terra,”
I said, trying to imagine the dude from
Napoleon Dynamite
’s head on Ethan’s body to help calm my racing heart.
Reverto terra,”
I said, trying to imagine the dude from
Napoleon Dynamite
’s head on Ethan’s body to help calm my racing heart.
“To cease.”
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