Xvi (10 page)

Even thinking about that move made me feel angry, and then guilty ... how could I be angry at Ginnie now? Then Dee came in and hung over the back of a chair, her toes skimming the floor. “You think Maddie and Justin still go to Dickens?”

“Sure. I bet most of your friends will be at your old school. We’ve only been gone four years.” I hoped I was right. She needed something to make her feel better. She needed friends.

“Neens ... I miss Mom.” She sobbed quietly next to me.

I scooped her up, knocking over the container of flour with my elbow, hugging her as tight as I could, holding back my own tears. Even though she was eleven, she felt so small, so vulnerable. Eventually, she stopped crying.

“I’m sorry.” She sniffed and swallowed hard “You miss her, too, don’t you?”

“Yes, I do.”

“What did they do with her body? Is it out in space with all the burial pods?” She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and looked at me expectantly.

I didn’t know what had happened—
“We’ll dispose of the body in the usual manner ...”
—I had to say something comforting. “Yes, it is. They sent her body out that very morning. She’s up among the stars now.”

“Gran says she’s in heaven.” Dee looked at me. “You don’t believe in heaven, do you?”

“If Gran says so, then it has to be true, Deeds. Gran does not lie.” Not like me.

Religion was one thing I’d never really thought much about. We’d studied the Religion Wars of the past and I’d decided then that it was not for me. It helped that Ginnie’d felt the same way. Religion seemed to me like one group of people telling another group that their color of red was the best. And that everyone had to believe that, or else.

The End-of-Wars treaty required that churches not attempt to impose their beliefs on anyone. The Governing Council had taken that a step further and made it illegal to preach religious beliefs in any form of Media. They claimed such preaching could be used to sow discontent and incite rioting. After everything I’d read about the Religion Wars, it was easy to understand how people would accept the GC’s edict.

Without Media support and broadcasts of religious programming, most churches ended up closing. Gran and Pops occasionally went to one of the only ones left in Chicago. Gran told me once that they could close all the churches in the universe, but they couldn’t close a body’s heart to God. I hadn’t done a lot of thinking about God in my life, either.

Dee startled me back from my thoughts. “I’m glad Mom’s in the stars,” she said. “Gran says we’ll all be together in heaven someday.”

“Then I’m sure we will.” No sooner were the words out of my mouth than my longing for Ginnie ripped through me like a blade. She wouldn’t be there when I earned my Creatives. It wouldn’t be her hand holding mine when the needle pierced the XVI into my wrist. We’d never again snuggle together on the couch, after Dee was asleep, watching old movies, munching popcorn and sipping Sparkles. She’d never make it all better when I couldn’t figure out how to.

And now that I needed answers about my father, the book, and just how I was supposed to deal with turning sixteen ... I could feel the tears welling up. I had to focus on something else. My eyes lit on the flour I’d spilled everywhere. “Look at this mess! Will you help me clean it up?”

“Sure.” Dee pulled the vac hose from the wall and swept up what had landed on the floor. “Think Gran will let us make lunch?”

“You go ask. I’ll finish up.”

“Oh, Neens,” Dee called out from the hallway. “My dad called me this morning. Just to make sure I was okay.”

My knees buckled and I had to grab the countertop to keep from falling. I knew he’d call again. He was, after all, Dee’s father. Ginnie’s words rang in my ears:
Don’t let Ed near Dee.
I’d promised. The comfort I’d felt at Gran’s telling me about her and Pops’s legal guardianship of me and Dee vanished. I didn’t trust Ed. Not one tiny bit.

Over lunch, I questioned Dee about the call. “So, Deeds, what did Ed say?” I tried to appear nonchalant, but nearly choked on a spoonful of soup while waiting for her answer.

“Ed?” Gran exchanged a look with Pops, then turned her attention to Dee. “When did you talk to Ed?”

“What’s the big deal? He called this morning to ask if I was all right.” Dee took a bite of her sandwich.

“And?” Trying to get information out of her if she wasn’t in a talkative mood could be tougher than avoiding verts downtown.

“I said I was fine.” She continued munching.

“Did he say anything else?”

“Nuh-uh, just that he was sorry he hadn’t called before but he was gone somewhere on business.”

I didn’t believe that for a minute. He’d been at the hospital that night. He probably knew more than anyone else about what had happened.

“Pops?” Dee said. “We’re going to Grant Park for the Ethno-festival like last year, aren’t we?”

“Yes indeedy, Deedles.” Pops grinned. “Remember last year when those clowns tried to get me on that trapeze?” He feigned falling backward, flailing his arms about. Dee giggled and they put their heads together, planning what they wanted to see at this year’s festival.

While it felt good to see Dee smiling, my suspicions about Ed were growing stronger. Since Ginnie set up the custody, she shouldn’t have had to warn me against him. But she did. She didn’t think that Dee was safe. I had to keep my guard up. No way was Ed going to take Dee away from me.

Dee, Pops, and Gran headed out to the festival, but I’d decided ahead of time to stay home, supposedly to get my room together, but really I needed time to search the baby book in private. It was the first time I’d been completely alone since Ginnie’s death. Knowing Ed had called Dee, I felt even more of an urgency to find my father and get in contact with him. Surely he would help me keep her safe. Even if Dee wasn’t his daughter, she was my sister and Ginnie’s daughter. That had to count for something.

My PAV beeped. It was Mike.

“Hey, whatcha doing? Wanna go downtown?”

“Not really. I’m busy unpacking.”

“Okay. We might stop by later anyway.”

“Please don’t,” I said. “I really need to get this done. Besides, I don’t feel like hanging out. I kinda want to be alone.”

“Oh, okay. Yeah. Sure. See you later then Nina. Bye.” Mike clicked off.

That taken care of, I retrieved the book from my dresser (which was nothing more than a packing box turned sideways). I took it and a little notebook to the living room and plopped into Pops’s chair. It smelled like him—ginger and aftershave. He loved candied ginger, said he picked up the habit from one of my father’s high school friends. I made a note to ask him about that—I needed any information I could get about my father now. Snuggling into the folds of the chair, I opened up “Baby Days.”

The first page was covered with pastel pink flowers, pale green leaves, and a blue sky filled with fluffy clouds. There were kittens and puppies among the flowers. The whole thing shouted “cute little baby stuff.” The facing page was a form filled out in Ginnie’s neat cursive.

Name: Delisa Jane Oberon

Born: April 21, 2139

Mother: Virginia Dale Oberon

Father: __________

I wrote all that down, making a particular note that Ed’s name was missing. He was married to someone else. Besides, this wasn’t her birth certificate. Maybe Ginnie hadn’t wanted a reminder of Ed in the book.

There were hand-drawn curlicues and flowers all around the page. Ginnie’d been a real doodler, just like me. She and I would even draw pictures together sometimes. She’d stick them up on the cook center in the modular, next to my art class drawings. The door buzzer went off. I nearly jumped out of my skin.

Running to the viewer, I squinted into it. “Hello?”

“Let us in.” Mike’s face was plastered up to the screen—his nose a big blob. “We’re here to cheer you up.”

Crap. Why did none of my friends ever listen to me? I’d really wanted to be alone. I couldn’t be angry at him, though, he meant well. I pressed the entry pad. “Get up here.”

Racing into my room, I hid the book and got to the door right as they knocked. Mike and Derek tried to push past each other, like some comedy team. Derek tumbled in first.

“Look who we found on the way over.” Mike pulled Sal out from behind the door.

“Hi,” he said quietly.

I barely nodded. Sal was the last person I’d expected, or wanted, to see. The minor heart palpitation I felt could not possibly have been caused by the twinkle in his brown eyes as he half suppressed a full-out grin.

He pointed behind me. “Looks like you dropped something.”

I glanced over my shoulder, and there on the floor was the pad with my notes—faceup and wide open.

I contemplated diving for the notepad but thought better than to make a big deal out of it. Before I could do anything, Sal crossed the floor and picked it up.

In two strides I was beside him. “Hey ...” I snatched the notepad away.

“Sorry.” He raised his eyebrows.

“Touch ... eee,” Derek said. “What’s in there, government secrets? Lemme see ...”

“It’s private.” I stuffed the pad into my back pocket.

“Wow!” Mike called out from the kitchen. “This is lots bigger than their other place. Where is everyone? Hey, Pops, it’s Mike!” He strolled back into the living room with an apple in his hand.

“They’re at Grant Park,” I said. “And yes, Mike, why don’t you just make yourself at home?”

“I did.” He took a bite of the apple and grinned at me.

Some things never changed.

He and Derek prowled around the living room while Sal studied the contents of the bookcase.

It was impossible not to notice how cute he was. I purposely turned away. I was not going to go all sex-teen like Sandy, ogling every good-looking guy she saw. It was only to see what he was doing that made me peek over my shoulder, taking in his profile.

“Is this your dad?” He pointed to a photo on the shelf. “You look like him.” He picked up the picture and held it out, looking from it to me. “Hey, Derek, don’t you think Nina looks like him? His name was Alan, right?”

“Yup, Alan Oberon.”

Derek and Mike joined Sal, glancing from the photo to me.

“She does, I guess.” Mike shrugged.

“Yeah, lots,” Derek said. He, Mike, and Sal all peered at my face.

“Are you guys done inspecting me?” I rubbed my neck to hide the blush that was rising up under Sal’s gaze. He put the picture back.

“Where’s your room, Neenie?” Mike said. “You get one all to yourself ?”

Mike’s questions stopped any further comparison of me to Alan, and they all stopped staring at my eyes, my nose. I wondered, did Sal think they were okay, maybe even pretty? I raised my eyes to look at him, and a warm feeling enveloped my shoulders for half a nanosecond...

Ugh! How typically sixteen could I get? Turning around, I stomped down the hall, totally aggravated with myself. What did it matter if he thought anything about me? I refused to be like Sandy, or practically every other almost-sixteen-year-old girl. I didn’t primp in front of a mirror or practice
XVI Ways
tips on getting boys to notice you. I was not going to let some random guy complicate my life, period.

I opened the door to my room and cringed. It was a mess, filled to capacity with the two beds, several boxes, and my fake dresser. I’d never worried about Mike and Derek seeing my stuff. It wasn’t the tier thing. Even though Mike was tier one and Derek, well, he was tier five, we were all friends. Tiers didn’t matter to us. But what would Sal think? He’d been dressed homeless when I’d first met him, but later, when we saw him at the zoo, he was wearing clothes that were definitely not Sale or Megaworld. They were at least as good as, if not better than, what Derek wore. I noticed the corner of the baby book jutting out from under my clothes. Sidling over, I nudged it back into hiding with my heel.