Worth the Weight (17 page)

She
saw half naked men all the time in the business she was in. And those men were professional athletes whose bodies were highly-maintained works of art. But not one of them sent a shiver racing through her blood like looking at
Finn
did
.

She got up and made her way to the dock just in time to hear
Finn
say, “The doctor said you need to stren
gthen your legs, this would be
a great start.” There was a determined look across Annie’s face that reminded
her
of
Finn
’s stubborn pride, but Lizzie also thought she saw a trace of fear in the huge blue eyes.

“I don’t want to.”

“Want to what?” Lizzie asked.

Katie explained, “We thought Annie might like to swim. We could take her out of her brace and put her in a life jacket and put one of those floaty things around her legs. Alison’s got children’s size jackets in the boat house that belonged to her nieces.”

“Oh, I’ve seen that done with paraplegics before, it’s good exercise for them,” Lizzie said.

“I am not a cripple! I can move my legs,” Annie shouted.

Knowing
she should feel chastised, but instead letting the kid push all her buttons,
she
simply said, “Prove it.”
She sounded like Alison, not good ol’ Lizzie. She kind of liked it. Maybe Alison had the right idea all along, speaking her mind, damn the consequences.

The kid had spunk. Once faced with the dare, Annie allowed herself to be put in the life jacket, water wings around her arms and a Barney flotation ring around her thighs, holding her legs up. Alison’s youngest niece was thirteen, at a point where Barney was only an embarrassing memory of youthful adulation. Like Shaun Cassidy was now to Lizzie. There was no telling how long the wings and Barney ring had been in the boathouse, but they held air. They also held Annie
’s limbs
.

Katie, Alison and Lizzie sat side by side on the end of the dock, dangling their legs in the cooling water, watching as Stevie and
Finn
administered advice and helping hands to a floating Annie. Lizzie could see the excitement and terror shining from Annie’s eyes from her perch.

“Deeper. I want to go deeper,” Annie demanded.

“It doesn’t matter how deep ya are, ya dope, you can’t stand up anyway,” Stevie said.

That seemed to set Annie off even more. “Daddy, deeper!”

“We can’t, honey, Stevie’s up to his chin now, and we really need to have two people with
you. This is fine, this is deep enough.”

Without thinking, Lizzie lifted her bottom off the dock, slid into the water, and did a few quick strokes to get out to where the threesome floated.

When she reached
Finn
and Annie, Stevie quickly relinquished his position at Annie’s feet to Lizzie and swam back to shore.

“Not her,” Annie said to
Finn
. Not quietly enough
so that Lizzie couldn’t hear
.

“Do you want to go deeper, or not? Because there doesn’t look to be any other takers to help.” There were, of course. Everyone there, besides Stevie, would be happy to dive in and help, but Lizzie kept that bit of information to herself.

“I want to go deeper,” Annie said, her voice small and tinged with resignation.

Lizzie gently put her hands on Annie’s calves and followed
Finn
’s lead as he took his daughter deeper. Stevie was right. For all intents and purposes, two feet of water or twenty would be the same to Annie, but there seemed to be a sense of freedom that shone across her face with each yard they moved from the shoreline. Lizzie realized that this might be the first time that Annie had not found herself bound to land in some fashion and her irritation with the girl was tempered with a new sense of empathy.

“Annie, what if I slipped off the Barney ring and held your legs up with my hands? I think Barney’s springing a leak.” A look of terror overcame Annie as she looked at the floaty ring and saw its rapid
ly decreasing size. “It’s okay. Y
ou don’t need it, I’ll just slip it off and hold your legs myself.”

Finn
started to make his way from holding Annie’s head in his hands to her legs, but the movement seemed to scare Annie even more and she began to struggle.

Lizzie put on her soothing tone, the voice she used when dealing with arrogant athletes. “No,
Finn
, you stay there. I’ve got your legs, Annie, see?” She slipped the ring off and threw it towards land. “There, who needs Barney anyway, he’s so passé.”

“Huh?” Annie said.

“He’s old, out of style.” At Annie’s nod, she continued, “Okay. I’m going to raise my hands up to your fanny now, so you can kick your legs.” She saw the look of panic from Annie, but didn’t let herself look at
Finn
to see his reaction. “Your dad says you need to strengthen your legs as much as possible before your operation. Here... now.... I’ve got you just as tight as before, just higher, that’s all. Your legs want to float naturally, they didn’t really need Barney at all. There, now let’s just start slow.”

The panicked look abated somewhat as Annie could see her feet and toes sticking up from the water. Lizzie watched
her
comfort level rise, and charged on. “Okay. Now just from the knees down. Bend your knees down then up. If it helps, watch your toes. Make ‘em disappear in the wa
ter when you take them down,
then bring them back up so you can see them.”

That was all it took. It seemed as if the little girl had been doing a backstroke kick all her life, she took to it so naturally. She quickly incorporated her entire legs. “Let go, Lizzie, let go, I can keep myself up.”

“Of course you can.” Lizzie let go and
Finn
had to step lively to keep up his hold on his daughter.

“Let go Daddy, I want to try it by myself.”

“Are you sure?” He was reluctant to release her head.

“She can do it,
Finn
. Use your arms, too, Annie, that will keep your head up.”

A small nod from the tiny head, acknowledged
her
instructions, and
Finn
slowly eased his
hand from under his daughter’s head. Her head immediately went underwater and
Finn
jumped to put his hand back, but Lizzie swayed him with a curt, “No. Don’t. She can do it.”

Annie’s head came back up, sputtering, and she immediately began moving her arms as Lizzie had told her. She began to move - jerking, awkward movements - but she was moving.

“I’m swimming! Daddy, I’m swimming!”

“I see, honey, I see. You’re doing great.” His voice was hoarse and choked-up. Lizzie found she could not speak at all. She looked at Annie’s face. The child’s blue eyes shone with excitement and accomplishment.
Finn
’s eyes. The thought made Lizzie’s gaze shift from the little blue eyes up to
Finn
’s larger, deeper eyes, which looked down at his daughter with a love so pure that Lizzie felt like an intruder.

His
eyes turned to her.
She
couldn’t read the emotion in them, but gave him a smile of understanding. He started to return the smile, then took a deep swallow and looked away, clearing his throat with a deep cough.

It didn’t matter. Lizzie knew how he felt. If
she
felt this good about the kid swimming, she could only imagine what Annie’s father must be experiencing.

He finally had Liz alone. Well, not really alone. The two other couples were right outside the sauna house at the picnic table enjoying an after-dinner beer. Annie and Stevie were in the camp, sacked-out, watching TV, totally pooped after a day of water play and a filling dinner of burgers, chips, potato salad and the cheesecake Gran had sent along
.
Happier than he had seen them both in a long time.

But here, in the blistering sauna, he had Liz alone. Finally.

Thoughts of her with Annie kept replaying in his mind. She’d been great with his daughter. He knew he would never have been able to be so unemotional with Annie, would have caved at her first whimper. But Liz had gotten his daughter to swim. More than that, she had gotten a shriek of excitement out of Annie that
he
wasn’t sure he’d ever heard coming from his daughter.

He felt an odd constriction in his chest. It was as if there was some kind of lightening, an easing. He didn’t take too much time trying to figure it out, didn’t want to figure it out, really. He was just…happy. It was an unfamiliar feeling. When was the last time he’d been as happy as he was right now?

Liz threw a bucket of water on the stove and the smooth rocks screamed and hissed as the steam rose.

“Geez, you’re going to kill us.” He hung his head to try and breathe, and wondered if he’d seem like too much of a wuss if he moved down to the cooler, lower bench.

“Pansy
-ass
,” she said, making up his mind for him. He stayed put on the top bench.

She arched her back up, lifted her arms to the ceiling, raised her face and took in the steam.
He
watched as her breasts jutted forward. He sat on his hands to stop himself from reaching out for her.

She was in her glory. Her skin, lightly tanned, was beaded with sweat. Her hair fell in wet masses down her back. Her lips were slightly parted.
T
his would be what she’d look like when he had her beneath him. Sweaty, arching in obvious ecstasy. “You love this, don’t you?”

“God, yes. The hotter the better. It does great things for your skin.”

“Your skin is incredible already.”

She breezed right over his compliment, as if not hearing it.
Or maybe not believing it?

“God, I miss saunas. I mean, they have them at the gym, but it’s just not the same. The ones
there are electric. They don’t get as hot, you don’t get as sweaty or clean, and obviously there’s no lake to jump in to.”

“Which I’m about ready for, by the way.”

“You’re on.” She got up and climbed down from the top bench to the cement floor and turned around to wait for him. She caught him looking at her ass and her hands went to her behind, tugging at the bottom elastic of her suit.

“Don’t cover up on my account, I like when your suit rides up.” She rolled her eyes at him and went out the door,
Finn
close on her heels. They slipped through the dressing room and out of the sauna building and ran the few steps to the dock. It felt so much better diving in quickly, not allowing your body to cool down from the sauna heat.

He grabbed her hand, both of theirs slick with sweat, and ran to the end of the dock where they both jumped in. Their hands parting for
Finn
to do a cannonball and Liz to execute a perfect shallow dive.

The cool of the water shocked
him
. He heard a little yelp from Liz and knew she was feeling the same pins and needles he was.

She swam out a ways and
he
swam to reach her. When was the last time he’d been swimming? Years. He’d taught Stevie to swim when he was little, before Annie was old enough to know what was going on around her. As soon as she turned three, resentment would mar her cherubic face if
Finn
tried to teach Stevie things she wasn’t able to do. So he’d either try to sneak his time with Stevie, or Stevie would miss out.

Not fair, he knew, but everything about the situation was unfair.

He caught up to
her
and stood. The water was at her collarbone, mid-chest on him. They stood for a moment, just looking at each other. He thought of her in the water earlier, with Annie, how she’d goaded his daughter into trying something that scared her. How Liz had jumped off the dock and swam out to them at the first sign of being needed. How her inexperience with kids seemed to fall away around Stevie.

How tempting her breasts looked swelling over the top of her swimsuit.

He couldn’t stand it any longer. He placed his hands on her waist, pulled her close and bent his head, bringing his lips to hers. She didn’t pull away, or pretend anything other than the truth. She wanted him as much as he wanted her.

Her lips burned on his. Her mouth could be scalding from the sauna, he figured, but knew it was more. She felt the same things he did, burned for him the way he burned for her. Always had.

He heard a quiet sploosh of water breaking as she raised her arms out of the lake and wound them around his neck, pressing herself into him. Steam rose off both their bodies, the contrast of their hot skin in the cool water creating a billowing cloud that encompassed them
.

Her face, wet from her swim, shone in the moonlight. He nibbled her neck, following beads of water making their way down to her chest. A lone drop settled in the vee at her collarbone and
he
scooped it out with his tongue.