Wondrous Strange (16 page)

T
here was a knock on the door.

“Just a sec,” Kelley called, and put aside the old hairbrush she’d been using to try to comb the tangles out of Lucky’s mane, with little success. The Faerie horse butted at her, and she affectionately scratched his nose.

There was another knock, more insistent this time.

Kelley got up and headed for the door. “Tyff?”

The door swung inward as Kelley gave it a pull, and she saw that it wasn’t Tyff.

The largest bouquet of roses she had ever seen obscured the features of the person standing there holding them. The
bouquet lowered slightly, and Kelley saw Sonny’s eyes over the tops of the peach-colored blooms.

She was thrilled and simultaneously horrified. She hadn’t been expecting visitors and was wearing yoga pants and a faded hoodie. She was also covered in reddish strands of horsehair and Lucky Charms sugar dust. Yelping, she jumped behind the door.

“Sonny! What are you doing here?”

“I came to see you.”

“You can’t.”

“You’ve learned the art of invisibility?”

“What? No!” She blinked, and stayed behind the door. “Wait. Can I do that?”

“Probably.”

“Oh…”

“May I come in?”

“No! I’m a mess! I mean—the place is a mess.” She glanced behind her shoulder to the obviously immaculate apartment beyond.

She could hear the smile in Sonny’s voice as he said, “I happen to think ‘the place’ looks absolutely wonderful,” and stuck the bunch of flowers around the door. “May I come in?” he asked again.

“Yes,” she answered. Surrendering, she plucked the bouquet from his fist.

He followed a few steps as Kelley went into the kitchen but stopped as a high-pitched whinny sounded from the
bathroom. “Is that…?”

“The only horse currently residing in my apartment?” she said, filling a vase with water. “Yup. Go say hi. Just, you know, watch out for the fangs and flaming eye beams.”

“The
what
?”

“I’m kidding.” She laughed. “Go. He’s
harmless
. You’ll see.”

Sonny shook his head. “You’ve obviously forgotten that, in my line of work, fangs and flaming eye beams aren’t necessarily uncommon.”

As he edged into the bathroom, Kelley clipped and arranged the roses; she counted more than two dozen of them. She took them out into the living room and sat on the couch, placing the vase on the coffee table. Then she pulled the elastic band from her hair and raked hasty fingers through it. She heard water running in the bathroom sink and then Sonny came out into the main room, drying his hands on a guest towel.

“He sneezed on you, didn’t he?”

“Yes. Yes he did.”

Kelley tried to pull a straight face. “But I also notice he did
not
try to strip the flesh from your bones.”

“I’d almost rather he’d tried that,” Sonny said ruefully.

Kelley laughed, fidgeting with her placement of the vase. “They’re beautiful,” she said, failing “casual” miserably.

He shrugged and said, “I just thought—after the past few days you’ve had—that you could use something…”

“Nice?” she finished, remembering their first encounter. “Are you going to disappear again before I have a chance to thank you?”

“No.”

“Thank you.”

“For the flowers? Or for not leaving?” He smiled and sat on the arm of the couch. “Kelley…I have to take Lucky back to the Otherworld. To the court of Queen Mabh.”

Kelley stared at him, a cold sensation spreading through her chest. “Mabh. Isn’t she the one who is probably causing all these problems with Lucky in the first place? No. I’m not giving him to her.” Kelley crossed her arms, prepared to fight.

Sonny put out a placating hand. “She sent one of her minions, a Storm Hag, to see me. The Hag said that the whole thing was a mistake. That it—that Lucky—should never have been brought to this realm.”

“Couldn’t this Storm Hag have been lying?”

“Faerie don’t lie. They may not always be the most forthcoming with the truth, but they do not lie outright. Kelley, I know how fond you are of Lucky.” Sonny moved from the arm of the couch to sit beside her and took one of her hands in his. “But he can’t stand in your bathtub forever, can he? If he stays, he poses a grave danger to the whole mortal realm. He will be destroyed. He’ll have to be. Otherwise he will become the destroyer. I know you don’t want that.”

“I just hate the thought of sending him back to that place….”

“Mabh granted me a boon if I return him, and what I will ask is that she will see to it that he is well cared for, and that she will not subject him to further enchantment.”

Kelley raised her gaze to meet his. “You’d do that? When you could ask her for
anything
?”

He nodded, and she could see in his clear gray eyes that he meant it. “He’s important to you. So that makes him important to me.”

Kelley rose from the couch and went to the bathroom door, leaning on the door frame. Lucky flicked his tail at her and blew a soap bubble out of his nose in greeting. He’d figured out how to do it on command and seemed to take great delight in the ability now. Kelley bit her lip, trying not to cry. It was silly. Sonny was right. She couldn’t keep him standing in the tub.

“He’ll sure be missed, and not just by me.” Kelley sighed. “Tyff actually went out and stocked up on all his favorite cereal.”

“Who’s Tyff?” Sonny asked.

Before Kelley could answer, the front door swung wide and her roommate appeared in the doorway as if summoned. Sonny took one look at her and threw himself off the arm of the couch, sinking into a defensive crouch.

“Seelie witch!” he cried, striking a menacing
en garde
pose.

Tyff’s eyes blazed like comets. Her beautiful face twisted in an expression of pure hatred. “Faerie killer!” she spat.

“One toe over that threshold and you die,” Sonny snarled, interposing his body between Kelley and the door. “Go back to the Otherworld and tell Titania this girl is under my protection. You seek her at your peril.”

Tyff blinked. “What?”

“Or is it Mabh you work for, harlot?” Sonny’s voice was a low growl in his throat. “Your kind have slippery allegiances, I know. Well, the Darkling Queen can no more have her than can Titania. Kelley is no pawn!”

“What exactly are you talking about, you deranged lunatic?” Tyff shrieked.

“On my honor as a Janus Guard, I tell you I will not let you harm one hair on her head!”

“Sonny, she’s not—,” Kelley tried desperately to interject.

“It’s all right, Kelley—you’re safe.”

“‘On your honor as a Janus Guard’?” Tyff said sarcastically. “Oh, that’s rich! Janus have no honor. Otherwise you wouldn’t be standing in the middle of my apartment uninvited!”

“You lie. This is not your place—”

“She doesn’t!” Kelley interrupted loudly. “It
is
her place.” She turned to her roommate. “And he’s not uninvited. I invited him in. Tyff, come inside and close the door. Mrs. Madsen down the hall is going to call the cops if you two don’t pipe down!”

Sonny’s eyes narrowed. “Kelley, she’s more dangerous than you know—”

“Oh, stow it, fleshling.” Tyff stepped over the threshold
and slammed the door behind her. “You know what I am and so you know perfectly well that I am incapable of lying. Why the hell
would
I hurt her? She pays me outrageous rent!”

“What?” Sonny straightened slightly, looking utterly confused.

“She’s my
roommate
. Wait a minute…are
you
the creep who’s been stalking her in the park?”

“Yes—no!” Sonny protested. “I’m not stalking her!”

“Why the hell is one of Auberon’s lackeys so interested in a silly little mortal girl?”

“Hey!” Kelley protested.

“Mortal?” Sonny’s tone turned mocking. “You mean to tell me that you don’t know?”

“Know what?” Tyff snapped.

“All this time living under the same roof, and it never occurred to Tyffanwy of the Mere, lady-in-waiting to Titania the Summer Queen, that her ‘silly little mortal’ roommate also just happens to be Auberon’s lost daughter?”

Tyff stood there dumbly, staring at Kelley.

“Holy crap,” she murmured at last. “When word gets out about this…Titania’s going to kill me.”

“H
ow could you not have suspected that there was something just a little bit different about her?” Sonny asked.

“Look at her!” Tyff said. “She’s so normal it’s almost weird. No offense, Kell.”

“Er, none taken. I guess,” Kelley muttered.

Sonny snorted. To his eyes, Kelley was unspeakably lovely. “She
is
powerfully veiled, I grant you. A leprechaun charm—”

“Well, no shit, Sherlock!” Tyff groused. “I can see it
now
.”

“I would have thought that a High Fae like you would
have been able to figure it out.” Sonny was rather enjoying himself.

Tyff glared at the Janus. “My senses have obviously been blunted by this world. I
have
been out of the loop for”—she counted on her fingers—“almost fifteen hundred years, you know!”

“Ah.” Sonny nodded, almost feeling sympathetic. “I forget the story. You were, what, banished, was it?”

“In a manner of speaking.” Tyff sulked. “But it
wasn’t
supposed to be permanent. I was supposed to be allowed back. After I had…‘served time.’ And then what happens?
Your
stupid boss goes and shuts all the doors.”

“You could have tried to get back,” Sonny said. “Made a run for it one Samhain.”

“And risk running into one of
you
bloodthirsty maniacs? Thank you, no.”

“What did you do to get banished in the first place?” Kelley asked, fascinated.

“Ask that Sir Lancelot creep,” Tyffanwy snapped. “Wait—no, don’t. It was complicated.” She waved the matter away with a manicured hand.

“Ookay there,
Tyffanwy
…” Kelley threw her hands in the air. “Is there anyone I know who is actually a normal, non-freaky, plain old vanilla-flavored human?”

“I’m sure that one or two of your actor friends are borderline normal,” Tyff answered, her tone doubting the assertion.

“They’re actors,” Kelley said. “They’re not even
close
to
normal. And anyway, one of them is actually Puck. Apparently.”

“What?” Tyff’s eyebrows shot toward her hairline. “The Goodfellow? Oh, super. Listen, you keep that miserable boucca away from the apartment, or I will not be held responsible for my actions.”

Sonny smirked. “What, did he stand you up for a date once?”

“Shut up.” Tyff scowled at him. “Just what
are
you doing here, anyway?”

“I’ve come to take Kelley somewhere safe,” he said. “And after that, I’ll be back to take the kelpie.”

“Over my dead, shapely body,” the Faerie sneered.

“I mean him no harm. But I have to return him to the Otherworld.” He told Tyffanwy about the Wild Hunt and watched her complexion drain to porcelain.

“Well. I think it’s safe to say that, in my absence, the power grabbing and backstabbing and political intrigue has officially reached an all-time Otherworld high,” Tyff said, rigid with anger. “This goes beyond bickering.”

“It does,” Sonny agreed. “Far beyond.”

“I
hate
the Courts!” she spat. “Why can’t they just leave off with all the stupid homicidal meddling?”

“I wish I knew,” Sonny sympathized. He understood only too well. No doubt Tyffanwy had experienced the fear and hatred of
his
lord’s realm and its people in much the same way that he had been made to fear and hate hers. He considered
that for a moment and thought that perhaps, just this once, they could put aside those differences and work as allies. Maybe she would help him.

Or, more likely, maybe she would help Kelley.

Sonny suggested a plan.

“You want me to do
what
?”

“Just get all the charms unknotted from Lucky’s mane and tail,” Sonny pleaded.

Tyff crossed her arms and pegged him with a pointed, icy stare. “They’re tied in with elf-knots. Do you have any idea how long that will take?”

“Tyff—”

“
Days
, Janus. I have a social life to maintain, you know. I have a date with an
ambassador
and you want me to cancel it so I can sit alone in this apartment, performing an equine comb-out.”

“Tyffanwy…please? Once I get Kelley to the safe house and secure protection for her, I don’t know how much time I will have left until Samhain falls.”

“That’s three nights from now!”

“I’m taking her to the Green, and time is tricky there.
You
know that.”

“How many of the damned things are there, anyway?”

Sonny thought he could hear a note of relenting in Tyff’s voice and he pressed on. “I asked Cait—one of the other Janus—about the enchantment. She knows her magicks and
she figures that there should be nine times nine talismans. Eighty-one all together. I have three of them. Which means that there should be seventy-eight stones left.”

“Can’t you just rip them out? Like the ones you found at the Lake?” Kelley asked.

“I tend to think Lucky would react poorly to that, don’t you? Mild-mannered he might be, but one well-placed kick from those hooves could be deadly.”

“What about cutting them out?” she asked.

“Can’t.” Tyff’s voice was flat. “’Cause that would be cheating. Right, Janus?”

“Tyffawny’s right, Kelley. Magick like this tends to react poorly—dangerously—if one tries to…well, cheat. There aren’t really any shortcuts—our only hope is to untie all the knots. The spell has to be completely unraveled, or there is still the chance it will remain potent.” He turned again to Tyff.

“I hate you.” Tyff glared at him.

“And?” Kelley demanded anxiously from where she’d sat silently on the couch, listening to the negotiations. “If all of the talismans are removed?”

Sonny looked at her. “Then he should pose no threat of becoming the Roan Horse of the Hunt.”

“He’ll just revert to a normal, garden-variety kelpie.” Kelley was skeptical.

“Like I told you, I don’t think Lucky is very normal, as far as kelpie go.” Sonny smiled at her. “In fact, your Lucky is the sweetest-tempered monster I’ve ever encountered. I think
some of your nature must have imprinted on him when you rescued him, Kelley.”

Kelley looked at him. “Did you just call me sweet?”

“Maybe…”

“Oh, get a room, you two,” Tyff said, disgusted, and went to the cupboard in the bathroom. She pulled a large-toothed comb and several brushes out of a basket.

“Thank you, Lady Tyffanwy,” Sonny said with genuine gratitude and respect, relief flooding his chest. He would have time. Kelley would be safe, he could return Lucky to the Otherworld without fear, and the Wild Hunt would slumber on.

“I hate you, Sonny Flannery,” Tyffanwy said.

“Just remember to keep his hooves wet. At least until all the charms are untied.”

“
Hate
you.”

“All of them—the ones in his tail, too. Seventy-eight in all. And I’ll be back as soon as I can,” he promised. “Kelley…” Sonny turned to her. “You should go get ready so we can leave.”

“What? Where?” Kelley blinked, startled.

“Out,” he answered. “If you’re all right with that.”

“But it’s almost sunset. Aren’t you…you know, on duty?”

“I was curious about that too, Janus,” Tyff said over her shoulder as she sat on the side of the tub, worrying away at a knot. “It is the middle of the Nine-Night, after all. Aren’t you
a little too busy to be going on a date?”

Beside him Kelley stiffened and made a little squawking noise.

“I told you, I’m taking her to the Green, so I’ll be within the boundaries of the Gate,” Sonny said. “I’ll still be ‘on duty.’”

“I can’t believe you want to take her
to
Central Park,” Tyff said, “tonight.”

“She’ll be safe with me.”

“You hope.” Tyff gave Sonny a long, appraising look and seemed to be coming to a decision about him.

“Kelley?” Sonny said to her, ignoring Tyff’s critical eye. “Why don’t you go get dressed?”

“Make it something nice,” Tyff said, turning back to Lucky. “Wait—never mind—you don’t have anything nice.” She put the comb down. “I’ll get you something of mine.”