Wicked Surrender (15 page)

Her body dissolved into a blissful puddle in his lap. She didn’t know how long she stayed there, she felt as though she drifted in and out of sleep. But when her eyes slowly slid
open,
she could feel the rig
id press of his cock against the back of her head
.

One hand steered the car while the other stroked her stomach in loving passes. She looked down to see he’d pulled her dress back down and covered her naked pussy. That little thought thrilled her more than it probably should.

It was completely dark outside now with only the occasional passing
car lights
lighting his face in bright sweeps of light. Vera’s heart tightened in her chest. She bit her lip to keep from saying the words she so desperately wanted to.

Suddenly his hand left her stomach to curl under her chin. He passed his thumb across her lip, giving her no choice but to stop biting it. She could smell her essence on his fingers and pride filled her. While he
made
her state her claim on him, she’d claimed him in the most basic of ways. Her scent was all over him.

“What’s wrong, baby?”

“I...nothing. Why do you ask?”

“You were biting your lip like it was a tasty steak. You only do that when you’re bothered with something.” Vera sputtered. Like hell, how did he know that? She didn’t even know that about herself.

“It was
nothing;
I was just thinking I guess.”

“About what?” About how I love you and you can’t even date me. About how when we get back to Chicago you’re going to kiss me goodbye and never see me again. About how certain she
was,
she’d never be the same. He was her mate. There was no doubt in her bones as to that.

When she’d asked Vane and Rome about
it,
they’d told her the same thing. That it was an unquestioning truth they’d realized; there was no doubt or hesitance, only pure understanding from their souls and their beast. Vera thought it sounded like a bunch of guys who just found love for the first time, but now she knew she’d been way wrong. It was true. Her lykaen, her heart wanted to keep this man at her side forever and ever.

“I was just thinking about how I owe you,” she said and
wiggled against
his hard erection. He bared his teeth in
a
pained grimace and was already shaking his head.

“Thanks, but we can’t baby. I can’t drive while you touch me. It was hard just touching you and focusing.”

Vera grinned and ignored all the nasty thoughts popping in on her by rolling over. She rubbed her cheek over his zipper like he was a genie’s lamp
and she was ready to get her wish
.

“
Dammit
woman did you not hear a word I just said? If you touch me there I might run this car off the fucking road.” A desperate urgency was inside her. She had to do this. It was the only connection he had to her. She released the button of his jeans and the hiss of the zipper sounded.

Already she could hear his breathing deepen. When a big hand curled in her hair, she knew she’d won. She pulled down his tight jeans until his cock popped free. She wanted
to tease him like he’d done her
but couldn’t bring herself to. Her emotions were too raw. And some evil part of her wanted him to remember her after he left her, to remember this moment for the rest of his life. For every woman he had yet to fuck and make smile.

She licked a path up the long length of his cock,
then circled the head and took him
into her mouth. She moaned at his flavor and licked the leaking semen away at the tip. He was so hot in her mouth and soft against her tongue.
His taste was so unique.
So masculine, heady, and delicious.

She brought her hand into the mix and began pumping him from the base of his cock. His cock pulsed and flexed in her hand like it had a mind of its own.

“Vera,” he said darkly. She didn’t know if it was a warning or a threat, so she ignored it and began sucking his cock in earnest.

She pumped her fist and took him deep, bobbing fast up and down his hard cock. She d
idn’t leave any place untouched
but moved her hand so she could taste his entire length. He bumped the back of her throat and she swallowed
convulsively
around him. The hand in her hair tightened, then held her there as he let out a feral growl that echoed in the car.

She lifted her head then sucked him deep again and again. His cock was soaking wet from her mouth and she used her fist again to pump him hard and fast. She could hear his breath catch and it was like music to her e
ars. She sucked him in deep
with a desperation
bearing
from deep inside her. He pressed her down and she tasted the subtle saltiness of precum, and then his legs twitched underneath her and she knew he was close.

Closer and closer he pushed her until she moved her hand away and his short groin hairs pressed to her lips. Then he shuddered hard, his cock swelling wider, and hot squirts erupted in her mouth, landing
thickly
in her throat, on her tongue. She swallowed over him and he groaned long and hard. He kept coming, filling her mouth up so that she had to swallow again.

Finally his hand eased up in her hair and she pulled away, tucking him back in his jeans and settling back into the cold passenger seat. She jerked her panties up her thighs and rebuckled her seatbelt.

He casted a jerked glance at her. “What’s wrong?” His voice sounded like it’d been run over with sandpaper.

“Nothing,” she said and plastered on a smile. His eyes narrowed on it and her smile faltered, then faded completely. The one man she desperately wanted to bluff right now and he could see through her fake smile like some kind of magician.

“The hell it’s nothing. I just felt a wave of cold from you that has my balls damn near shriveling in despair.”

Vera giggled.
S
he couldn’t help it.
Then she shot him an accusatory glare for making her laugh. His frown softened.

“Baby, tell me what’s wrong.”

Vera took a deep breath, trying to think quickly. She’d never been very good at making quick decisions.
She thought about it
then nodded,
coming to a conclusion.

“Fine you asked for it.” She turned to face him in her seat. “I love you. I sure as hell never thought it’d happen with someone like you. A damn
human.
But obviously fate is a cruel bitch. Not only that but fate settled me with someone who has such big relationship issues that he’s never even been in one!” He didn’t say anything. It felt like hours passed before he finally did. Vera was sure her hair had turned gray by that point.

“You don’t understand. I can’t risk being in a relationship with a woman. What happens when I get mad?
Do I have to make
you
and I learn the hard way whether or not I’m like my dad?”
Vera closed her gaping mouth, her heart went out to him
,
wanting to comfort him, but she knew he’d reject her touch right now.

“Have you ever felt the urge to hit a woman you’ve been mad at?”

“Of course not, but it’s different when people are actually in a relationship.
I tazered Sandra after I learned she was part of a hoax to get me
away from the mansion that day at Conlin
’
s.
If I was willing to do that in a split second, then I don’t know.
I have no idea what I’ll be like. What if I can’t control myself?” He looked at her with such raw intensity that tears warmed her eyes.
Oh,
baby.

“But your father drank and you don’t. That was his catalyst. I’m sure you don’t have the same one. You hated what he was
like;
you are in control of yourself, not him and his actions.”

“No, I don’t drink much anymore, but I used to...a lot. The marines helped to straighten me out, and so did Rome, but don’t kid yourself Vera. It took a long time for that to happen. I was out every night I wasn’t working whether Monday or Saturday pounding them back until I was too shitfaced to see straight.”

Tears fell down her face and there was no stopping them.

“I got into fights with any and all motherfuckers who crossed me. Did Rome tell you that I was shitfaced when we first met? That’s why I was so pissed off he ran into me. I didn’t want to tell you before, but now you know. I was a fucking drunk, just like him. Drowning my bulls
hit problems. And you know what?
M
y problems were still there when I came out of it. Mom was still left alone with him while I was passing out on the barroom floor.”

Vera choked back a sob and he turned to give her a disgusted glance. All the passion and sweetness was completely wiped from his face and all was left was raw pain that had been festering for far too long. Years too long.

“I’m weak, Vera.
Susceptible
just like he is. I’d hate myself if I ever hit a woman like that.” Vera wiped
futilely
at her tears, desperately feeling like she was quickly losing him.

“But I’m not weak. I wouldn’t let you hit me if it ever came to that. Don’t you see, I’d be the perfect woman to try
to
see how you
are?
And you don’t drink. Did you ever have the urge to fight when you weren’t drinking?”

Jacks cut her an angry glare. “Do you hear yourself woman? Are fucking crazy or just stupid? Sure you’re strong, so maybe you’d have a fighting chance, but I got one off on your brother when I was drunk. He didn’t let me hit him, I was that fast. If I can get him, then I can sure as fuck hit you. And what is wrong with you? You want to sign up to be my girl and test out if I’d fucking blow my shit and hit you?

“I do drink on occasion, a beer here or there. What happens when I finally lose control and go on a bender? Then I come home to you and I get mad at you because you not sitting straight enough or you didn’t laugh at my joke. What will you do then, Vera?

Will you leave me or will you just stay with me year after
year as
it gets worse and worse.” He was close to shouting in the car, his words ringing off the windows. Vera cried silently, shaking like a leaf in the wind, trying to get warmth back into her body.

“You’re not your father, and I’m not your mother.” Her teeth were chattering hard. It took focus, but she calmed it enough to speak. “You would never hit me, Jackson. You’re not like your father, and I am not your mother. You wouldn’t hit me for not laughing like your dad did to her. I can’t explain it, but I know in my heart it’s true. I’m just so, so sorry you can’t see it.”

She turned away and dried her tears on her shoulder. He said her name softly, but she didn’t turn to look at him. She obviously couldn’t help him to solve his demons
—
only he could do that.

Vera rested her sweaty temple against the cold pane of the window, watching as rain started pouring down. She almost sighed at the sound of it beating hard against the car. The silence was killing her, but this gave her something to focus on.

A yellow blur came out from the
tree line
. Jackson cursed and slammed on his breaks as the car barreled into something hard. The crunch and bend of metal was piercing in the night air.

The car lurched forward, then whipped around hard in a circle.
They spun once more then landed off the shoulder of the highway. Vera had only a moment to see the deep ditch below her window, and then they were plummeting towards it.

Chapter Eleven

Vera opened her eyes just so the incessant voice nagging her would shut up.

“Fuck off,” she said and settled deeper into her seat.

“God dammit, I said get up
now!
” Vera’s eyes popped open one by one at the urgency in her mate’s voice. She looked left and right but then the world spun hard. Her head felt like a small explosion had gone off in there and her face felt scratchy.
She saw the white air bag
exploded
in front of her and sent a silent prayer up to heaven.

Suddenly she sat up in her
seat
, quickly removed the belt,
and leaned over to Jacks who was grimacing as he tried to undo his seatbelt. Blood was on his forehead and his bottom lip.

“Baby, oh my G
od, what happened?” She crawled toward
s
him and the car screeched and dropped another foot. Vera yelled and clung to her seat.

“It’s fine. Are you okay?”

“
M
mhmm
,” she said, nodding a little too fast.

“Listen, we’re at the bottom of the ditch. We can climb up no problem. And we won’t drop any further, what you just heard was the car settling in to the
divot
. Look at me baby, look at me, Vera.”

Vera’s panicked eyes
swept to
the
rain pounding on the windows,
then to
their headlights shining off into the
trees
, and finally settled on his.