Whiskey Girl (2 page)
Authors: Maggie Casper
Not wanting to give him the upper hand,
Ausha made up her mind to take the initiative. She grabbed a copy of their very
simple menu, a glass of water and a notepad to use in case he actually wanted
to order food, which she highly doubted, then marched across the room, her head
held high.
“Evening, Detective Pennington.”
“Mrs. Malone.”
Ausha cringed at the greeting. She hated
any reminder of her marriage and yet had not been able to make herself take
back her maiden name because in her mind it would leave her daughter Lauren
without a real mother. Logically she knew it made absolutely no sense, but it
was what it was. No matter of thinking it over or talking it out managed to
change things.
“Ausha.” She offered her first name as an
alternative, taking care not to look directly at him. The short glimpse of his
features warned her the detective had been a busy, busy boy since leaving the
bar earlier that morning. He’d been digging into her past. The thought made her
angry. Was that pity she spied in the way he looked at her? If so, it was
infuriating. She didn’t want his damn pity. As a matter of fact, she didn’t
want anything from him.
“Then please call me Doug.”
When she nodded, he motioned toward the
crowded bar where Jeff served one drink after another with ease, all the while
he kept them in his sights.
“Good young man you got there.”
“Yes, he is. He wanted to escort you out.”
Even Ausha could hear the laughter in her voice although she was well aware no
smile curved her lips. Smiling was not something she did very often these days.
Maybe she would soon or maybe she wouldn’t ever again. It wasn’t something she
worried about anymore. Making it through every day as it dawned was about as
much as she could take at any given time.
“Why don’t you sit down for a minute?”
Ausha shook her head before his invitation
was complete. “It’s a busy night. I came by to see if you were ready to order.”
“I’ll have water and a burger, please.”
She was surprised he was actually going to
eat. “No beer?”
“I don’t drink.” There was a finality to
his tone that made her stop and look directly at him. After her little date
with Jack earlier in the morning she expected to see condescension in his gaze.
Once again he surprised her. Not only was he not judging her, but after
studying him closely, it was obvious he also did not pity her. For that she was
grateful. There was something about him that made her feel keenly aware of his
nearness and power, something that caused discomfort on a completely different
level than she was prepared for.
“I’ll bring it out as soon as it’s ready.”
It was a hasty retreat, there was no way around it. Ausha could feel his gaze
trained on her back as she all but ran away from his table. She’d send Jeff
back with his order because there was no way in hell she was going to go
head-to-head with him. He’d chew her up and spit her out before she even had a
clue of what was happening.
Chapter Two
Doug sat behind his desk, staring blankly
at a file bearing Brian Malone’s name. After reading through it, seeing the
pictures, he understood why the man had ended his own life. He also understood
the bone-deep agony that had Ausha lashing out at him yesterday when he’d
brought the news of her ex-husband’s suicide.
Seeing her last night should have been
enough for him to realize she would be okay. She seemed like a strong person,
the type who took life by the horns and pulled through no matter what. Problem
was Doug was more than aware she lied not only to the world at large but to
herself as well.
Her outer walls might be strong as steel,
but what she held inside was in danger of spilling over if she didn’t talk to
someone, find an outlet. He decided after leaving the bar last night he would
take it upon himself to make sure she did whatever was necessary to heal herself.
Doug had also decided to be available for any physical outlet she needed.
Preferably the type that did not require clothes. He was aware it sounded crass
and uncaring, but he also knew sometimes there was nothing better than a good
fuck to blow off steam.
Finishing his paperwork for the day, Doug
unfurled his body from the desk chair he’d been occupying for what seemed like
uninterrupted days and stretched loudly.
“Damn, man. A roar like that’s bound to
scare even the local wildlife.”
Doug couldn’t help but chuckle as Ryder
walked into the office. The man was completely different than the person he’d
known before. Anger and pain no longer clouded his eyes. Instead, he bore a
constant smile and the reason why was completely obvious every time Ryder
looked upon the face of his wife Kelly. They had a rough time finally getting
together, but from all appearances, it had been well worth the wait.
“Been a long day.”
“Want to talk about it?”
It was a common question between friends
who were in law enforcement. Oftentimes speaking about the atrocities they’d
seen with someone who could relate helped more than the most expensive, and yet
oblivious, therapist. It helped too that fellow officers often shared a very
morbid and seemingly off sense of humor.
“I would say same shit, different day, but
that wouldn’t really be the case since Memory tends to be as quiet as they
come.”
Doug watched as Ryder lowered himself into
an empty chair. He also knew the man wouldn’t budge until he was sure
everything was okay. With a sigh, Doug lowered himself back into the chair he’d
recently vacated. Once seated, he pulled the file he’d been looking over then
pushed it across the desk to Ryder.
It was a few minutes before either of them
spoke again. “Rough.” It was Ryder who spoke first. “I assume this is the guy
whose next of kin you notified yesterday?”
He pushed a hand through his hair. He
couldn’t help it. The whole thing bothered him big-time. “Yeah, it was.”
“And that didn’t go well?”
Doug stood then. It was as if ants crawled
across his skin every time he remembered the silent tears, the gunmetal gray of
angry, piercing eyes accusing him. “She wasn’t just his next of kin, she was
his ex-wife. That,” he pointed to the picture of a tiny bullet-riddled body
still strapped into its car seat, “was her child.”
“Fuck.” Ryder murmured the word as he
closed the file. Doug could do nothing but nod in agreement. “She’s been
through a lot. My guess would be she wasn’t too heartbroken over the suicide
then.”
Doug didn’t even know where to begin. At
first she’d seemed like a blood-thirsty woman thrilled with what could have
felt like revenge, but now he recognized the look of utter confusion and loss
in her eyes. She’d been hoping to feel vindicated, and yet, after hearing the
news, she hadn’t. Her daughter was still dead and buried, and she was still
alone and angry. And out of all of it, Doug felt the overwhelming need to care
for this woman.
“To say the least.” Doug thrust a hand
through his hair. “I don’t know what it is, man, but I feel the need to take
care of her.”
“If you get involved with this Ausha Malone
woman, you’re asking for trouble, Doug.” Ryder held up a hand when he opened
his mouth to protest. “She’s been through a lot and there are some things I’m
not sure even time can heal. I know you, and I know when you’ve made up your
mind about something it’s a done deal so I won’t try and talk you out of this
no-win mission you’re on, but I will say this…” Ryder stood then walked toward
the door, turning when he reached the threshold. “Don’t get in too deep and be
careful with her. She deserves that much when she didn’t ask for your help.”
No more words were exchanged as Ryder
exited the room. Doug’s curt nod was all the acquiescence the man needed to
know he understood. He also knew his friend was right. Attempting to play
knight in shining armor to Ausha Malone was bound to be very painful, probably
for the both of them. And yet it was still something he was going to do whether
the woman wanted the help and attention or not.
He left his office feeling heavy. If he
were smart, he’d stay as far away from Malone’s bar as humanly possible. Of
course, he never claimed to be the brightest crayon in the box so the chances
of that happening were slim to none.
With plans for another late night watching
Ausha, Doug stopped by the small house he occupied on the outskirts of town to
change clothes before heading back. He wanted to separate himself as the
officer who’d been introduced to her in a way she could only see as negative
and the simple man he truly was. He doubted it was a realistic possibility
since being a police officer was ingrained into him as much as being a
red-blooded man was, but he had to try.
Doug walked into the bar, his eyes working
to adjust to the early evening dimness, to see Ausha’s skinny employee with his
hand on the small of her back as he helped her down from a stepstool. Jealousy
rose like bile up his throat. He swallowed it down and tried not to stare a
hole through the man’s head as their eyes met. It wasn’t an emotion Doug was
used to, one he had no clue what to do with except follow his instincts. When
they were done, he crooked his finger to the young man.
It was comical how Jeff checked behind him
before a look of dawning crossed his face and he realized it was him who was
the recipient of Doug’s displeasure. It was a situation most worked hard to
stay out of.
When the young man approached, Doug
remained quiet, waiting for him to speak first. It was obvious to Doug his
choice to remain quiet had the bartender on edge.
“Was there something you needed?” Doug had
to give the guy an A for effort. Even though he was fidgeting big-time, his
voice was calm and modulated.
“What’s your name?”
“Jeffrey, but most call me Jeff.”
“Doug.” He pushed a hand forward for the
younger man to shake. “Why don’t you climb the stool next time, Jeff.” It
wasn’t a question so he didn’t phrase it as one.
“Believe me, I tried.”
Doug liked the man more and more. “Stubborn
is she?”
The man smiled a knowing smile. “You’ve no
idea.”
I wouldn’t be so sure of it,
he thought to himself. Even in the short time since they’d met,
Ausha had proven on more than one occasion how stubborn she was.
“No monopolizing my employee’s time, Doug,”
Ausha said as she walked up to them.
“I wouldn’t think of it, darlin’.”
He lowered his voice enough to see if the
change in timbre made any impact on Ausha. Doug was relieved to see it did. She
paused briefly before continuing on her way past them. He followed without
missing a beat, taking the now-folded stepstool from her.
“I’ve got it.” Exasperation tainted her
voice.
She didn’t have it though because Doug
refused to release the metal handle of the stool when she tugged at it.
“What were you doing up on the stool?”
Ausha sighed loudly and released her hold.
Her irritation was clear for all to see, written across every feature of her
face. “Changing a light bulb.”
“It would be a better idea for Jeff to do
it next time.”
Doug was well aware he was overstepping
those invisible bounds most independent women erected, but he didn’t really
care. She barely reached his shoulder. As a woman of short stature, she had
absolutely no business climbing on stools and reaching for light fixtures that
would still be out of her reach.
Was the man for real?
Ausha turned to study his face. She wasn’t sure if what she saw was
pity, worry or both. What she did know was she didn’t want or need either.
She’d like to explain very thoroughly to
the handsome police officer standing before her, watching her just as keenly as
she was him, that the worst thing possible had already happened to her. Falling
from a stepstool wouldn’t even be a blip on the radar. Something made her bite
her tongue though. The fact he might actually be a little worried for her
sparked something deep within, something Ausha was sure she’d lost. A fire that
had been extinguished through tragedy and the resulting negative emotions that
had, in essence, taken over her life.
She’d spent the last couple of years
building a wall of mistrust, doubt, anger, bitterness and regret firmly around
her, and yet a part of her longed desperately for a breath of fresh air. Being
stuck inside was a lonely, lonely place. Problem was Ausha had absolutely no
clue how to extricate herself.
She shook her head slightly as if trying to
clear such a stupid thought from it. It wasn’t only that she didn’t know how.
It had as much to do with the fear she experienced even at the thought of
letting someone else in. No, she couldn’t chance a crack in the walls because
then the whole fucking thing might come tumbling down. If it happened she would
finally have to deal with what life had come to be for her and that was
definitely something she was not ready to do.
“Jeff just got here. Not that it’s any of
your business, Detective.”
“Doug.” He made his name sound like a threat.
His tone made her tingle in places she had absolutely no right to tingle,
pissing her off more.