Where Forever Lies (24 page)

Trees
rushed past her in a blur, the radio was playing but she had no idea
what was on, all that came to her mind was Tyler and Sarah. He’d
played with her emotions after everything she poured out to him. He
had made the comment of feeling used but really it was she who was
being used this whole time.

A sob
echoed in the small car, loud enough that if someone else was in here
with her, they would be able to hear it, even over the loud bumping
of the music. Her phone kept ringing but she wasn’t in the mood
to talk to anyone. All she wanted to do was be alone with her
thoughts right now. She figured it was probably Tyler and she had no
desire to talk to him. There was no point. Things had already been
ruined. It was obvious to her that he was seeing that girl, so why
should she give him another chance. So he could break her heart again
down the road? Or even worse, Kyra’s?

She slowed
down for a stoplight as she got farther in the city and reached for
her phone. She glanced down at the missed calls and saw Tyler’s
number. He’d left a message and her finger hovered over the
button as she debated on whether or not to listen to it. She looked
up and saw a light mist falling, blanketing her front window and
momentarily blocking her view of the world outside. She turned the
wipers on and curiosity got the better of her. She turned the music
down and tapped the button to play it. The car was completely silent
for a few seconds; the only noise was the sound of the wipers
squeaking back and forth against the wet windshield. As she held the
phone up to her ear, Tyler’s deep voice broke through the
silence of the car, making her heart clench. His voice cracked
midsentence letting her hear the pain and remorse he was trying to
portray. A hint of doubt surfaced in her clouded mind.

What if
I’m overreacting?

That
thought scared her too. The whole situation terrified her. She could
be wrong to overlook this and stay with him. It could put her at risk
of him doing something similar, again, causing even more pain than
now. And she could be wrong to overreact and not hear him out. He
could have a good reason for what had happened today. Or not.

She wiped
at her eyes and took a quick glance in the mirror, trying not to
swerve and get pulled over. Her nerves were shot, her face was red
and swollen and she was confused. Terrible wasn’t even good
enough to describe what she looked like. It was bordering on a
horrible mess. Her hair was sticking out of her ponytail from their
love making earlier, the crying had done a number on her complexion
and her clothes were filthy with horse hair and dirt from riding
today. She had never let herself look this disgusting in her life.
This was what Tyler Evans did to her.

She needed
a shower and wine. A lot of wine. She looked at the clock and
frowned. It was already eight o’ clock, getting close to Kyra’s
bedtime. She wondered if her mom wouldn’t mind keeping her for
the night. The thought made Paige feel terrible; to worry more about
her emotions than being a mom, but it didn’t happen often and
she was probably long overdue for a therapy session with Kyleigh. She
had pushed her feelings to the side during two tragic events in her
life and now she was dealing with another loss of sorts. This ordeal
with Tyler couldn’t compare to losing Randy and Natasha but it
still hurt her already damaged heart. It was all just too much to
bear alone.

She pulled
out her phone and dialed Kyleigh’s number and once she answered
she filled her in on everything.

♥♥♥

Ten
minutes later she was walking into her apartment, thankful that her
mom was more than happy to have Kyra spend the night and grateful
that she had an awesome friend like Kyleigh to drop everything and
come straight over to talk. She stood on her tiptoes and pulled out
two wine glasses from the top cabinet and poured herself a full
glass. She leaned against the countertop staring down at her glass,
just swirling the wine aimlessly around as her thoughts spiraled out
of control.

She
already had one glass down and was pouring another one when a knock
at the door brought her out of her miserable thoughts. She swung the
door open, expecting to see Kyleigh, but she came face to face with
Tyler.

As she
stood there staring at him, everything around her seemed to become
hazy. He didn’t say a word, he just stared back, a broken look
covering his usually hard, arrogant face. She was glad, because she
felt broken too. She felt like shutting the door in his face and
going back to drinking her wine, pretending he wasn’t behind
her door looking just as miserable as she felt. But that wasn’t
like her. Even though she was angry she didn’t want to let her
anger override her rationality. She took a sip of her wine, tapping
her foot vigorously on the hardwood floor, waiting for him to say
something.

Finally,
she said, “What are you doing here?”

A crease
appeared on his forehead as he gave her a hard look. “Do you
think I’d just let you run away like that and not chase you
down so I can explain. You didn’t even give me the benefit of
the doubt, you just automatically took some irrational girl’s
side, instead of mine.” He looked intently at her, he wasn’t
shy or nervous about it, he looked at her as if his life depended on
it. His hands were resting in the front pockets of his Levis and he
licked his lips slowly before he said, “Paige, can I come in
and talk to you. Please?”

She let
her mind mull over his words and then asked, “Why should I let
you in? What happened to Sarah?”

A look of
irritation hit his face almost as if she’d slapped him.
“Because that crazy incident back there meant nothing and was
all a stupid misunderstanding. I can explain everything, but I don’t
want to do it standing on your doorstep so all the neighbors can hear
every word that echoes through these halls. And Sarah left after you
did. I don’t know why she even showed up to begin with.”

With her
hand resting on her hip, she sighed and motioned for him to come in.
She would hear him out and let him try to explain that mess back
there. She didn’t see how he could talk his way out of it, but
she would be open to listening. It couldn’t hurt any more than
it did right now.

He gave
her a relieved look as he walked past her, settling in the kitchen
area. He started pacing and dragged an anxious hand through his hair.
After a second he looked around and said, “Can we go outside?
The rain has let up.”

Without
saying a word, she walked to the balcony. She slid the door open,
leaned against the black railing, and stared at him expectantly. She
held her hands out in front of her and said, “So, explain.”

He rubbed
the stubble on his face as his clouded eyes met hers, and then he let
out a long breath. “Look, Paige. I had been single for a long
time before I met you, and yes, Sarah and I had a thing going on for
a few months. Nothing serious, just hooking up occasionally. I wasn’t
really ready for a relationship and I made that very clear with her
in the beginning. And then when I met you, I broke it off with her
completely because I desperately wanted to give us a try. But
evidently she had a hard time understanding it,.” He took a
step towards her and leaned against the railing with her. “And
to be honest, she wasn’t the girl I wanted to have a
relationship with.” He turned his head and looked at her, his
eyes begging for her to see the truth in his words.

Paige felt
her mind reel with mixed feelings. She finally met his eyes and held
them, wanting to see if the truth would outshine all her uncertainty.
She saw it, but her mind was still unsure. What he was saying seemed
honest enough and she didn’t feel he was hiding anything else.
She needed time to think it all through. “Tyler, I’m not
looking for a fling. Just having sex and hanging out isn’t what
I’m after,” she said adamantly, crossing her arms in
front of her.

He turned
to face her completely. He reached out and placed one finger under
her chin, making her meet his eyes before he said, “I want so
much more than that from you, Paige. So much that I don’t know
if I’ll ever have enough time to get it all from you. I just
hope you’ll give me another chance so I can try.”

She stared
at him, not knowing what to say to that. She wanted more from him,
too, but how could she get the courage to let her guard down, again?
She watched his eyes travel down to her lips and felt the anger in
her want to slowly fade. “Tyler, I don’t know if I can
handle being let down, again. I’ve been struggling lately with
a lot of stuff and I need someone who’s going to be there for
me, not bring me down.”

His hand
rose to her cheek, softly rubbing. “I promise I’m not
going to let you down, again, Paige. I would never do anything to
hurt you. And I thought I didn’t want a relationship until I
met you, but now that’s all I think about. I can show you how
serious I am about us, if you’ll let me.”

Despite
the way he had crushed her heart earlier, he was now giving her hope
that things would be good. She watched as leftover raindrops dripped
down the sliding glass door and felt each negative emotion that she
was holding onto slip away with every drop that fell to the balcony.
She felt the sincerity in his words and saw it in his face. She
needed hope. And she wanted Tyler in her life. She pursed her lips
together and held her index finger up to his chest as she said, “I’ll
give you one more try. And if you screw it up this time, there’re
no second chances.”

A relieved
look stripped away the worried lines on his forehead and his lips
turned up into a confident grin, showing nothing but dimples. “I
never make the same mistake twice. And you’ll see how serious I
am about you. You’ll probably end up getting sick of me.”

A smile
finally escaped her tight lipped expression, “We’ll just
see about that.”

He gripped
her waist and pulled her into him, taking her face between his hands
and pressing his lips roughly against hers. Her lips parted, giving
him the access that he wanted and she felt the softness of his tongue
as it found hers. The unease and betrayal that had been hanging
around her was slipping away into the night. The security he gave her
was washing away her doubts. She just hoped he wouldn’t prove
her wrong.

She
quickly pulled away and reached into her pocket, pulling out her cell
phone. “I’d better let Kyleigh know she doesn’t
need to come over,” she said as she punched in her text
message.

After
explaining to Kyleigh that she was okay, the rain chased them off the
balcony and they headed inside. Paige felt the relief of having all
the stress and problems mended and wished everything in her life was
this simple. She knew there were still wrinkles in their relationship
that needed to be ironed out, but she also realized that talking
things over was better than running away from the problem. As she
shut the sliding glass door, she turned to him, “Do you want to
stay the night?”

“I
was hoping you’d ask,” he said as he went to the fridge
and poured her another glass of wine and pulled out a beer for
himself.

She walked
up to him and slipped the beer from his hands, setting it on the
counter behind him. One corner of his mouth turned up as a
mischievous grin appeared on his face.

She leaned
forward and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him into a
kiss. “I think it’s time for you to show me how serious
you are about me. I’ll be holding you to that promise every
day.”

With that,
he grabbed her in his arms and carried her down to the bedroom, his
lips never leaving hers. As he laid her on the bed, he quickly took
off his boots, tossing them to the side. She leaned up on the bed on
her knees, grabbing his shirt and yanking it off. He helped her out
of her clothes and within seconds was lying on top of her, their bare
skin molding into one.

With every
touch, she felt him pouring more of his heart out to her. His
calloused hands softly caressed her body in a loving way, taking the
time to feel each flaw, each scar, each bump that made up who she
was. His focus was only on her as he showed her how much more he
wanted from her. It wasn’t just sex to him, it was obvious that
he was taking this moment to learn everything he could about her. The
warm feeling she had all over began to blaze with the need for him to
take her completely. She ran her hands up his strong back, feeling
his muscles tense under her fingertips.

As he
entered her, she gripped his back from the rush of pleasure, gently
digging her fingernails into his skin. They quickly fell into a
seamless rhythm, neither wanting the moment to end and both striving
to make it last as long as possible.

She caught
his eye as their love making intensified, each thrust building on the
last. They shared the same urgency in their eyes, wanting this moment
to last forever and needing this moment to convey their true
feelings. A low moan fell from Paige’s mouth, her breathing
intensifying more the longer they made love. A light sheen was
forming on their bodies and Tyler’s mouth found hers as her
body began to convulse in its release. She let out one last moan as
she gripped his biceps, the feeling taking her over the edge. His
muscles became tense as he, too, began to come, letting out a low
guttural sound from deep within his throat.

After a
few seconds, his body collapsed onto hers. She wrapped her legs
around him, pulling him in even closer to her. She didn’t think
he could physically get any closer, but she already had a vacant
feeling as soon as their love making ended. She ran her hand through
his hair as they let their bodies descend into a normal rhythm. She
felt his heart rate begin to slow, his breathing to steady, and the
dampness of their bodies begin to diminish.