When a Pack Dies (26 page)

Fina turned away from the screen, bellowed, then smiled back at Owen.

“So have you decided what you’ll do?”

“
Other than fantasizing about kicking back on a tropical beach next time I’m on leave and count in my head those millions of dollars we have?
”

“Seriously.”

“
Seriously. If it’s okay, I’m going to stay where I am. You know if you need me, I’ll hop on a plane as soon as I can. The work here keeps my mind off what happened. Besides, if you don’t need me, there’s nothing for me to come back to.
”

“Hey, honey.” Cutler walked into the office, carrying Ryan on his shoulders. He ducked so Ryan’s head could clear the doorway. “You screeched?”

“I did. I’m talking to Owen and he asked if Ryan would show him his drawing before I mailed it to him.”

“Yeah. Sure.” Ryan scrambled down off Cutler’s back and raced down the hall to his room.

“While I’m here, can I talk to him?” Cutler asked.

Fina’s eyes widened then she nodded and stood up. Cutler sat down in the chair she’d vacated.

“Hmm. Warm,” he teased and leaned toward the laptop, scanning Owen’s face. He started pecking at the keyboard with two fingers. “Owen, my name is Sheriff Cutler Powell. Fina may have mentioned me.” He glanced up and winked at her. “I’m the pack Alpha. I can’t invite you to join without meeting you first. You know how it is with established packs and outside, adult males. But you’re always welcome to visit. When you’re ready, come out and stay for awhile. Fina tells us how much she likes talking to you about old times.”

The two men looked over each other’s images.

“
Thanks, Sheriff. I appreciate the offer. Maybe I will sometime.
”

Cutler nodded, said “good,” out loud then sat back in the chair and hauled Ryan onto his lap when the six-year old raced back into the room. Ryan held a drawing up to the pin-hole camera.

“
Back it up, cowboy,
” Owen typed. “
It’s too close.
” There was a pause. “
That’s a great drawing, Ryan. You’re really good. I can’t wait to show my picture off to the other fellows. Can I hang it up in my quarters?
”

Owen spent the next fifteen minutes explaining what quarters meant, what he did on night patrol and asking about Ryan’s day.

Cutler stood up, kissed Fina and let her take his place so she could type out Ryan’s responses for him. Nath came in, winked at her and thumbed through his paperwork for the next day’s trek.

“Fina I wanna go
home
.” Ryan’s strident tone echoed through the room. He started to cry.

Owen’s face was frozen in surprise, then the furrow in his forehead deepened.

“
Stop it NOW. Just because you’re my cousin does NOT mean you can throw a temper tantrum. Do you understand me, Ryan?
”

Fina read back Owen’s response. Ryan stopped crying but his lower lip shook. He nodded at the screen.

“
Better. I’ll talk to you tomorrow. I can’t wait to get my picture. Give Fina a big hug and kiss goodnight for me. Bye.”

His image faded off the screen. Both Cutler and Nath glanced down at Ryan worriedly.

“Okay. Bedtime, big guy,” Nath said with forced enthusiasm. He ruffled Ryan’s hair. “We’re getting up early to go fishing, remember?”

Ryan stuck his thumb in his mouth as he followed Nath out of the room.

While the brothers helped Ryan get ready for bed and listened to him read, Fina stayed in the office, writing another email to Owen. He’d read it later that day when he could book more computer time.

“I wish I knew more about this parenting stuff. Today Ryan and I were in the grocery store and he was telling the clerk that his mother always buys apples
and
bananas. Present tense. He knows they’re dead but sometimes I think he imagines they aren’t. I’m going to ask the local doctor for a referral to a counselor. This is way beyond my skill set and I don’t want to screw him up.” She hit “send” and started a virus scan before calling it a night. To her surprise, the laptop chirped at her. It was Owen.

“
You won’t. You take too good care of him to let that happen.
”

“Thought you’d logged off.”

“
Have a couple of minutes left before the friendlies start throwing live ordnance at me. I didn’t want to reward Ryan’s bad behavior by staying on-line with him.
”

“Clever. Looks like
you’re
the one developing some parenting skills.”

“
Bite your tongue, woman. I’m a religious believer in bachelorhood and keeping the old trouser snake firmly wrapped in latex whenever there are ladies around.
”

“TMI.”

“
Yeah, yeah. Anyway I really do have to go in a minute. Let me know what the counselor says but I’m sure Ryan’ll be fine. He’s just hurting and acting out. Sorry you have to take it. Remember, if it’ll help, I’d be willing to leave the service when my tour is up in a few months. The three of us can start up again in a new community back east. We’ll be smart, we’ll be safe and we’ll grow a large pack around us. The two of you won’t be anybody’s charity. You’re my responsibility. I’m not saying these guys poached you. They took you in and I’ll always be grateful for that. I just want to be sure you’ve taken an opportunity to step back and assess what it is you want
.” Owen’s head came up and he looked around. “
Getting off my soapbox now. Gotta go. Send that picture express. We can afford it.
”

The corners of Fina’s mouth turned down as she touched the blank screen. A part of her was lured by his offer and the picture he painted. It was also the part of her that grieved, that was still in shock and denial. She sat back in the chair and looked at the dark window, surprised that she recognized those feelings in herself. A few weeks ago, the subtleties of what motivated her had been beyond her comprehension.

In so many ways she still felt like a victim. She didn’t want to love again. She also wanted her old life back, wanted the things that had been taken from her. Talking with Owen made
that
seem real at least.

She closed the laptop. Now she was thinking like Ryan. Maybe all three of them were. She couldn’t blame Owen. His grief was fresher than hers or Ryan’s. He was a good man. A responsible soldier. A were. He’d commit to doing the right thing...he’d commit to doing the wrong thing if she said that’s what she wanted. Fina felt the truth of that in her heart.

What she couldn’t understand was the feeling of suffocation that had begun to settle on her. She rubbed her chest. Cutler and Nath had planned her life out for her. She didn’t know if she didn’t want it or if she was simply running away from yet another thing that could be taken from her.

*
   
*
   
*

“Are all the payments in?” Cutler nodded his thanks as Dorothea Pike handed him a cup of coffee. They were sitting around her kitchen table.

“The last ones came in this week.” She served him, Nath, Fina and her husband Gil slices of blueberry coffee cake.

“Payments?” Fina asked.

Gil nodded. “All weres in the pack with a regular paycheck contribute five percent of their net to a business-development fund. Pack members are invited to submit start-up proposals and budgets for seed money. Or grants if existing businesses have a capital shortfall.”

“What support do you give them?” Fina’s head tipped to one side.

“Support?” the older man asked.

Fina frowned. “Yes. Within the first two years, start-ups without mentoring in place have about a sixty-four percent failure rate. That percentage is higher if the business is in the food-service industry.”

Cutler jumped in. “The pack’s large, Fina, but we don’t have experts in every area of business. Look at Nath,” he explained, giving his brother a nod. “Before he started his outfitting business, there was nobody but old-time trackers leading a few guys from the city into the woods during hunting season.”

Fina tried to sound encouraging, not condescending. “Am I correct in assuming that, say, if someone wanted to start up a glass-blowing business, they’d know how to blow glass?”

“Um. Sure.” Cutler shrugged. “We ask about that on the form. What actual experience they have.”

“Good. That’s a good start,” Fina nodded enthusiastically. “Do you offer accounting information or seminars? Tax tips? Staffing referrals or even employee-sharing schemes? Ideas for keeping pace with market trends, the forces of supply and demand on the marketplace?”

“You’re still speaking English, right?” Nath asked. His brows drew together.

She grinned. “I’m talking business, Nathaniel. So what do you do with these payments once you receive them?”

“Well,” Gil answered. Before he’d retired, he’d been an accountant. Now he was the pack’s bookkeeper. “We deposit the money in a business account at the bank. Once we know exactly how much we’ve got to give out that year, we ask for proposals, then distribute the money after about three months.”

“Three months? All that cash, sitting in a bank account that’s not going to pay you any interest
and
charge you monthly fees?” She sighed and rubbed her forehead. “Has anyone ever suggested putting the money into short-term investments, holding back a percentage of the capital and all of the interest after dispersal, rolling that over into set-term investments and GICs, then maybe after five or six years, letting the fund become self-sustaining so that annual grants can be paid out of interest, leaving the principal intact so you wouldn’t need to ask your pack for money every year?” She stopped suddenly and inhaled.

Cutler blinked then grinned at her. “Looks like we’ve found ourselves a business manager after all. Guess you
are
more than just a pretty face.” He wrapped his hand around the back of her neck and rested his forehead on hers.

“Hey, Mr. Pike. That pony sure has grown.” Ryan came racing into the house. Fina shot him a look, pointed at the boots still on his feet, and Ryan walked backward to the door where he toed them off. “Is he big enough to carry me?”

“I think he just might be. In fact, I was going to ask your folks about it. I’m going out on horseback first thing tomorrow morning to check the fence lines. Mrs. Pike is going to pack me one of her special breakfasts-in-a-basket. Was wondering if they’d consider letting you tag along.”

“Yesss.” Ryan pumped his fist in the air, ran up to the table and positioned himself between Cutler and Fina. Nath was generally a soft touch and didn’t require wheedling. “Please.
Please
.” He bounced up on his toes. “I could sleep here tonight and you wouldn’t have to pick me up until later.”

“Quite the social planner, hmm?” Fina murmured and she regarded Ryan with a thin smile.

“You haven’t been invited, Ryan,” Cutler reminded him firmly.

Ryan’s face fell.

“Well, understanding that he
should
have waited to be asked first, and understanding that he’ll make
sure
he waits for an invite next time...” Dorothea interjected. “Ryan, if it’s okay with them, you’re more than welcome to stay over and have supper with us tonight. Do you have long pants for tomorrow?” She cast a critical eye over his shorts.

“In my backpack. Fina always carries around extra clothes for me.” He nodded enthusiastically. He looked up at Fina and Cutler hopefully then whooped when they said yes.

*
   
*
   
*

“That smells
good
.” The last word rolled off Fina’s tongue sensuously. She ducked in beneath Nath’s arm, gave him a quick squeeze and inhaled the steam coming off the pots on the stove.

“Have you finished registering for college in the fall?” Nath asked in his serious voice.

Fina snapped off a sharp salute. “Done.”

Cutler grinned as he walked into the kitchen, tucking his t-shirt into his jeans and heading for the sink to wash up for supper.

“Pre-registered for on-line courses? Paid the deposit?”

“Check and check.” She watched with rapt enthrallment as he transferred a very thick, very large, very rare flank steak from a sizzling pan to a cutting board.

“Dorothea would have fed you more cake this afternoon if you’d asked,” Nath groused as she leaned into his space, stared at the meat and licked her lips. “Did you forget to eat today?”

Fina shrugged then answered, “Grilled cheese sandwich. Heavy on the grilled.” Nath had prepared a basket of crusty-bread slices. She grabbed a piece and ran it through the juices running over the board. “Ryan didn’t complain.”

“Ryan’s used to charcoal. Hey—using a sharp knife here,” Nath scolded. He waited until she stepped back then started cutting the steak into very thin slices. “Go help Cutler set the table before I spill something on you.”

Fina huffed then bit into the bread. She headed for the silverware drawer. “Would you get the serving bowls down for me, Cutler?”

“Is that all I am to you?” He sighed dramatically and gave her a gentle hip check, took the bread out of her hand and ate it in one bite. “Your domestic drudge? Tall, dark and, er, tall?” He reached up into a top cupboard.

“Of course not,” Fina teased. She ran her hands over his back, following the curve of his shoulder blades, the indent of his waist. “You’re also some mighty fine prime meat, Sheriff.” Grinning, she gave his bum a squeeze. “You too,” she added, reaching out so she could give Nath’s backside a pat.

“Oh so now you’re objectifying us, hmm?” Cutler tutted. “There are laws in this state about that sort of thing, missy.”

“Laws that say I can?” Fina asked hopefully. She batted her eyes at him.

“Keep that up and you can get your own bowls down,” Cutler growled, despite his grin. “How about I make a bowl out of you?” He dug his fingers into her waist until she bent over and squealed with laughter.

“Hmm. Not a bad idea,” Nath said quietly. He set down the knife and turned to them. “I think a little...penitence is in order, Sheriff. What do you think?”

“Oh I’m always up for a game of crime and punishment.”

“What are you two up to?” Fina demanded suspiciously. She watched Nath’s eyes flash then darken as he licked the juice off his fingers.