Wedding Survivor (15 page)

Olivia and Vincent looked at her. "Are you all right, Marnie?" Olivia asked as the maid came into the room carrying oatmeal in a glass.

"Fine, fine," she said hoarsely. Her eyes were watering. She was literally choking on "
a million five
." Her poor brain could not compute. She could not, even in her fantasy, spend a million and a half dollars on a wedding. The maid handed her the oatmeal, and Marnie took a big swig of it

It was nothing short of a miracle that she managed to keep from spewing that slop all over that insanely white room.

"Don't you like it?" Olivia asked, and seemed genuinely disappointed that Marnie's eyes were bulging out of their sockets.

"Love it," she croaked.

"No arch, Livi," Vince said again. "I'm not going there."

Olivia gave him a look as Marnie discreetly put the sea grass aside. "We'll talk about it later, Vince." And she turned a smile to Marnie. "What about the flowers? Can I have the flowers?"

"Sure, sure," Marnie said, her mind still reeling from the cost of this wedding.

"I would like… thirty thousand white roses," Olivia said. "Flown in from Holland."

No one else said a word. Everyone in that room—save Marnie—seemed to think that was perfectly reasonable. "That's… that's doable," Marnie said brightly. "But, ah… you'll Have to have them flown in from Holland the day before, you know."

"Yes."

"And then transported to Colorado."

"Right," Olivia agreed.

Marnie cleared her throat, pasted a bright smile on her face. "The thing is, that's a logistical nightmare to have flowers flown in from Holland, clear customs, then moved to another plane and flown to some place in Colorado or New Mexico, and then, you know, driving thirty thousand roses up the mountain…"

Olivia blinked.

"I think she's saying shoot for a more reasonable number," Vince suggested to Olivia. "Like maybe, ten thousand."

"That won't be enough," Olivia said, lifting her chin. "I want roses at the wedding site and at the reception. I want them
everywhere
."

Marnie opened her mouth to reply, but Olivia cut her off. "We'll figure out something," she said brusquely.

She couldn't imagine what Olivia thought they'd "figure out," but whatever. This little planning session was going nowhere fast. "So!" she said, smiling so hard her cheeks hurt. "We've got flowers and theme… What did you have in mind for the dinner?"

"Filet mignon," Vince said at the very same moment Olivia said "Lobster. And sushi appetizers."

Vince scoffed. "You think they can get lobster up there?"

"You think they can get beef?"

"Yes I think they can get beef. There's a million cows walking around those mountains, remember? Those hombres can probably slaughter a cow and cook it right there."

"Ooh yeah,
that's
appealing!" Olivia snapped. "I'm not having food made from animals at my wedding."

"Well honey, what do you think a lobster is?"

"A crustacean! It's not the same thing!"

"Then I guess you haven't heard the lobsters scream when they put them in the pot to boil them alive."

Marnie kept the smile pasted to her face as the conversation deteriorated into what constituted an animal, and wrote on her little notepad:

Help!!

At some point in the argument, Olivia and Vince determined they'd think more clearly about what they wanted with some wine and French fries, which they agreed was a food group that hurt no one, and they all loaded up in a limousine and headed for Zax. Olivia and Vince decided to smoke a joint on the way over, and even Delia had a couple of hits. Only Marnie declined, sitting across from them next to the hairdresser or whoever he was, with her wedding organizer on her lap, trying in vain to wave the smell of pot away from her clothes.

For the record, it was at Zax that the paparazzi got the shots of Olivia slapping Vince that showed up on
Access Hollywood
and
El
that night, along with the speculation that the love affair between the two hottest stars was over.

It also happened to be the place Marnie was sitting when her cell phone began to ring a cheerful little tune.

"Hello?" she asked anxiously as Olivia and Vince were in a heated discussion about the use of professional guests, who would be hired to keep the dancing alive at the reception and make sure everyone was having a good time.

"Hey, it's Eli. How's it going?"

"Great! Just
great
! In fact, we're sitting here at Zax talking about the reception."

"Who's there?"

"Olivia. And Vince. And Olivia's mother and her assistant, Lucy, and—"

"I get the picture," he said, and then he asked, so quietly she almost didn't hear him, "Are you doing all right?"

Marnie was uncertain if he was asking her how she was after their little adventure last night, or if he was asking if she was doing her job well. In the moment she was trying to figure it out, Olivia slapped Vince.

The place suddenly erupted into a hail of flashbulbs. It seemed to Marnie as if they appeared from thin air to surround them.

"Hey!" Vince shouted, oblivious to the cameras as he caught Olivia's hand before she did it again. "Stop that shit!"

"I'm sick of this, Vince! Every time I turn around you are checking out someone's ass!"

"I'm not checking out anyone's ass!"

"What about that waitress? She's practically drooling all over herself and so are you!"

"Marnie?" Eli asked. "What's happening?"

"Ah… there seems to be a little argument," she said, and tried to laugh it off, but Olivia looked like she was on the verge of tears. She suddenly stood up, knocking the table and tipping over stemmed water glasses when she did. "That's
it
, Vittorio! You want that piece of ass? Go get it, because you're damn sure not getting any from me!"

Vince tried to grab Olivia's arm, but Olivia jerked it out of his reach and accidentally hit her mother, who was trying to stop Olivia from making a scene.

"Holy shit. Come on," the stylist said, grabbing Marnie's arm. "Let's get the hell out of here."

"What's going on?" Eli demanded.

"Ah… I'm gonna have to call you back," she said shakily, and flipped the phone shut, grabbed her purse and briefcase, and headed out with the stylist in the opposite direction of Olivia, her mother, and Lucy. At least she thought it was the opposite direction—she'd been blinded by the light of camera flashbulbs. But she thought only Vince remained, and he was looking like a sad little puppy for the benefit of the cute waitress.

Marnie and the stylist dude ducked out through the kitchen and ended up in the alley. "What do we do now?" she asked, still blinking.

He shrugged, pulled out a joint, and lit up. "I'm gonna walk down the street and get a cab."

"But my car is at Olivia's," Marnie said.

He exhaled loudly. "Sounds like a personal problem."

Marnie frowned. He winked and started walking toward the street, pausing once to look back over his shoulder at Marnie. "You coming?"

She sighed, slung her briefcase over her shoulder, and went with the stylist guy to catch a cab.

When she made her way back to Olivia's, she walked up to the gate and punched in the pass code Olivia had given her.

"Hey, sweetie, get Olivia outside for us, will you?" one of the permanent paparazzi called out to her from the hood of his cat.

Marnie snorted, walked through the gate swinging open, and made sure it closed behind her before walking up the long drive to her car. But as she reached the car, the door of the house flew open and Olivia came running out, tears streaming down her face.

How
did
Olivia know the moment Marnie was at the door?

"It's over, Marnie," she said, and caught a sob in her throat, wiping the tears from beneath her eyes.

"Oh no, Olivia, are you sure?" Marnie asked.

"Yes. I never want to see him again," she said, and choked on another sob. "I can't marry a man who's always looking for a piece of ass, and can
get
it whenever and wherever he wants! Do you know that slut waitress gave him her number while I was sitting right there? And he
took it
!" Olivia Dagwood let out a wail like Marnie had never heard. "How I am supposed to have
children
with that man?"

Excellent question. Marnie dropped her briefcase and purse on the hood of her car and ran around to Olivia, putting her arm around her tiny shoulders. Olivia turned her face into Marnie's shoulder and cried. "Olivia, I don't know what to say," Marnie said. "If you can't trust him, you can't marry him!"

"So… you don't think I should marry him?" Olivia squeaked.

Was she serious? "Well…" Marnie said in a play for time, "I'm not telling you what to do—"

The sound of a vehicle startled them both; they turned around to see a cab coming up the drive. It pulled up behind Marnie's car, and Vince got out the back, pulled some bills from his front pocket, and tossed them in the window at the cab driver, then slapped his hand on top of the cab, telling the driver to go on.

"What are you doing here?" Olivia shrieked.

"Livi," Vince said, walking toward her, his arms wide open, an inch or two shorter than Marnie, the giant. "Come on, Livi, don't be this way."

"Marnie thinks I shouldn't marry you," she said, squaring off.

Marnie winced, raised a hand. "Hey, don't listen to me. I'm just the wedding planner—"

"Yeah, well, maybe you ought to plan someone else's wedding if you're going to go around making asinine suggestions," Vince snapped.

"She's right! I shouldn't marry you if I can't trust you, Vince! You let your dick lead your life, and where does that leave me?"

Vince frowned at Marnie. "Do you mind, wedding planner? I'd like to talk to Olivia."

No, she didn't mind in the least, and in fact, was grateful for the out.

"Don't go, Marnie," Olivia whimpered. "Don't leave me alone with him!"

"Okay, well… the thing is, I've got to pick my mom up from the hospital," Marnie lied, backing around the front of her car. But neither megastar heard her. They were too busy staring daggers at one another, and Olivia was still wiping tears from her face.

Marnie made a break for it, grabbing her purse and briefcase and throwing them into the car. 'Talk to you later!" she cried, and got in before either of them could respond if they were so inclined, and tore away from the whacked-out Brentwood scene as fast as she could.

When she finally turned onto Sunset Boulevard and headed for home, she realized she could hear the cell phone beeping. She dug around her purse for it, finally retrieved it, and looked at the display as she pulled up to a red light.

She'd missed ten calls. And she had six messages. She wondered how Eli would take the news that Vince would want her fired. Probably okay, considering the wedding was now off. Maybe Eli would thank her. Maybe he'd buy her a big expensive gift for ending his nightmare so quickly.

She didn't call him back and didn't answer the cell when she heard the cheerful tune on her way home.

When she walked into the house, the book club was sitting around the table. A stack of paperbacks, untouched from the last meeting, was still in the middle.

"Well, well, look who is home," Mrs. Donaldson said, and sipped daintily from her tumbler.

"Oh honey!" Mom cried, and jumped up from her chair and hurried to intercept Marnie before she headed to her room. "Eli McCain has been calling you. He
really
needs to talk to you…" She glanced over her shoulder at the four pairs of eyes fixed on the two of them, then leaned forward and whispered loudly, "
about you know what
."

'Thanks, Mom."

"Marnie? Did you go shopping today with anyone we'd want to hear about?" Mrs. Farrino asked.

"
Mo-om
," Marnie protested.

"Oh now, I didn't tell them a thing. They're just very clever and they guessed," Mom said, and bustled Marnie along. "Be sure and look in on Bingo!" she called, just as Marnie's cell began to ring. "What is that noise?"

"Nothing!" Marnie called over her shoulder and ran down the hall, into her room, and shut the door. Only then did she flick the phone open. "Hello?" she asked timidly.

"Where in the hell have you been?" Eli asked loudly. "I've called you a hundred times. I gave you a cell phone so I could speak to you when I needed to."

"I
know
. I'm sorry. I was in the middle of a crisis," Marnie said dejectedly, and let her bags drop to the floor, then with her back pressed against the door of her room, she slid down to her haunches. "It's been a really long day."

"I gathered as much. You wanna tell me about it?" he asked, his voice gone quiet and sure again.

Strangely enough, Marnie did want to tell him. She told him about the wedding plans, and the pavilion, and the flowers, and the arch. Eli said nothing. So Marnie told him how Vince and Olivia got into an argument about the reception, and that the group moved to Zax, at which point Eli groaned a little. She told him how Vince was making moon eyes at the waitress who slipped him her number, and how Olivia had slapped him and stormed out in a hail of paparazzi fire. And she told him how the stylist rescued her—

He interrupted her with a chortle. "He's not a hairdresser, Marnie. He's their connection."

"Their
connection
?"

"Weed."

"
Oooh
," she said. "No wonder that guy wanted out of there so fast."

"Yeah," Eli said with a chuckle. "So then what?"

"Then," Marnie sighed, "I opened my mouth and inserted my entire size eight foot." And she told him how Olivia had come crying to her, and what she'd said, and how Vince had not been too happy, and that Olivia said it was over. And when she finished, her head in her hand, her new sandals flung across the room, Eli laughed.

He
laughed
. Not big and hearty, but a low and long laugh, as if he didn't believe her.

"I'm serious, Eli."

"I know you're serious, girl," he drawled. "I'm laughing because they aren't through. They've only just begun."