Wayward Trouble (Wayward Saints MC Book 5) (23 page)

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. Do you need anything else?” I ask, wiping the tears from my eyes.
 

He looks over at Prez again, and he nods. “I know you have a backup plan, so give it to me or I’ll let her actually put that knife into your skin,” Prez growls.

“I don’t know fucking shit,” he says.
 

Jase grabs him by the throat and squeezes, “Give us the fucking information now,” he grits out.
 

I run my finger along the blade and smile. Looking at Saxton, his eyes widen when I take a step closer to him.
 

“Fine. Fine!” he yells.
 

I don’t take my eyes off of him until he spills the information they want.
 

“If anything happens to me, they will pack up shop and move it on a dime. They won’t risk getting caught by the feds or the local leo’s. When they find out that Kyleigh is gone too, I have no fucking clue what they might do. They might just leave you alone, and cut their losses,” he whimpers out the last sentence.

Jase walks over to me, and Prez nods his head at us. Jase hands the gun back over to me, and takes the knife out of my hands.

I raise the gun and aim it at Saxton’s head. Dom and Ryder both let him go and step away, as I pull the trigger.
 

The shot echoes in the room, and I watch as he falls to the ground. I feel all the blood drain from my body, and I almost pass out. I just took someone’s life. I killed a man. Jase grabs the hand with the gun, and pulls me into his arms.
 

“Sugar,” he whispers against my hair.
 

I release the gun and grip his arm, pulling him to me. He passes the gun off to someone else, and picks me up and carries me into the room that we’ve been sharing for the past month. I can’t hear anything that’s going on around us. All I can hear is the sound of the gun firing over and over in my head.
 

“Sugar, I need to you look at me,” he says forcing me to look into his eyes.
 

“I need you to breathe. You are going to be okay, but you need to force yourself to deal with this. Baby I will always be here for you, but you have to deal with it. Cry, scream, punch the bed, just do something. You need to get it out, don’t keep this shit in Sugar, it will eat you alive.”
 

Hearing him care that much about it, makes me break down and sob on his chest. I cry for what seems like hours. When the tears finally dry up, we are both laying back on the bed, and his eyes are closed.
 

Getting up and off the bed, I go in search of some water and then make a bathroom stop. Looking around the rooms, I don’t see any sign that anything happened here last night, and it makes me think about everything that happened last night.

After using the bathroom, I wash my hands and make my way back into the room. I can feel Jase’s eyes on me, before I even walk through the door.

“How you feeling Sugar?” his voice is concerned, and he’s watching me like I may go crazy at any moment.

I crawl into the bed, and cuddle into his body.

Looking up into his eyes, I smile. “I feel like I am finally free for the first time since I was eighteen. Thank you for letting me make that happen. I don’t know what I would have done if I wasn’t the one who did it.”
 

“Sugar, I’m just worried that it’s gonna mess with that beautiful head of yours. Taking someone’s life isn’t an easy thing to deal with, and you should never have had to.”
 

“I love you Jase and I am thankful for everything you’ve done for me. Without you, I wouldn’t have been able to end this terror I’ve been living with.”
 

He gives me a questionable look and then kisses my lips. “I love you too Sugar.”

I can tell this isn’t the end of this conversation. He is looking at me like I might break at any minute, but I think I’ll be just fine. I just want to go and see our little girl. She’s the only other thing that has kept me going while we are going through all of this craziness.
 

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Watching her get up and walk through the house this morning makes me worry about her. I don’t know how she is gonna handle knowing that she killed someone a few months from now. The only thing I can do now is make sure she knows that I will always be here for her.

After talking with her about her needing to let it out, she just gave me a smile and kissed my lips. I hope I didn’t make a bad decision by letting her be the one to end his life. I should have done it, but the look in her eyes stopped me from doing it myself.

After we packed our bags and left them in the living room for the prospects to pick up later, I link our hands together and lead her out to my bike. She’s been quiet since we talked this morning, and I have no clue what is running through her head.
 

I get on my bike and wait for her to get on behind me. When she’s holding on to me, I turn the engine, and rev it a few times before I take off towards the clubhouse.
 

When we pull up, I see Anslie and the kids standing there waiting for us. Before I can even come to a complete stop, Wyn is jumping off my bike and running to Carsyn. Wynter picks Carsyn up and squeezes her.
 

Anslie catches my eye and gives me a thumbs up. I’m sure Brant already told her what happened last night, and Anslie probably agrees with letting her pull the trigger. I’m still not sure it was the right thing to do, but I don’t say anything. All I can do now is make sure that I’m here for her when she needs me, or if it becomes too much for her to bear alone.

When Carsyn sees me, she squeaks, and tries to get out of Wynter’s arms. Wynter smiles brightly, and sets her down so she can come and run to me.
 

Swooping her up into my arms, she wraps her little cubby arms around me and I see Wynter walking over to us. She wraps an arm around me and kisses both of us on the cheek.
 

“Anie Win,” Carsyn says looking over at Wyn. “I see Mommy gan?”

Wynter looks over at me, and I shake my head no. Before we left the house, I got word from Prez that they found Kyleigh’s body a mile away from the clubhouse.
 

“No sweetie. Would you like to stay with me and Jase?” Carsyn has tears falling down her cubby little cheeks, and I feel shitty for not making sure that Kyleigh lived through that. That little girl needs her mother.
 

Carsyn nods her head to Wyn’s question, and lays her head on my shoulder. I watch as Henley and Prez come walking towards us.
 

“Jase, I need to talk to you. Hen will talk with Wyn about what needs to be done for custody of the little one.” I nod my head and hand Carsyn off to Wynter. She squeezes my neck, before she lets go of me. I kiss Wynter and follow Prez to his office.
 

Prez takes a seat behind his desk and motions for me to take a seat on the couch.
 

“How is Wynter holding up after everything last night?” His question is straight to the point and I should have known this was coming.
 

“To be honest, I don’t know. She’s happier this morning that’s for sure. But part of me is afraid that’s she’s just gonna fucking snap at any moment.” I run my hands over my face and place my head in my hands. Never have I ever felt like I was powerless before.
 

“The only advice I can give you is to be there for her if and when she breaks. It’s one of the reason’s I never let women do club business,” he states sadly.

“Why did you let her then?” I question. Looking up I see something pass over Prez’s features, and I know I’m about to learn something no one else knows about.

“Avelyn shot someone once and it about destroyed us. She kept it in and one day after Bentley was born, she just snapped. She got depressed, and would fight me on everything fucking little thing. There was no way I could win. I finally had to sit her down and ask what the hell was going on with her.” He looks over at me and just stares at me for a minute, before he continues.

“Dominic was kidnapped once by some crazy bitch who thought that he was her son. Instead of calling me, Avie called your old man and asked for his help. He wanted to tell me, but she made him swear he wouldn’t. When they finally found the woman and Dominic, he had a bruise on his face, and was hiding in a corner. I guess Avie flipped, and pulled your old man’s gun out of the back of his jeans.”

Holy fuck. This isn’t something I’ve ever heard. Shit, I’m pretty sure there is a reason none of us have heard it. I continue to just listen, and hope that I can use this story to help Wyn if the time comes.
 

“Avie shot the woman in the chest, and didn’t even blink an eye. Your old man said Dom was crying in the corner and he picked him up and grabbed the gun from Avie. He placed a call to a few of the brothers and got both of them out of there before anyone saw who shot the woman. He protected my wife, and never said a word to me. When she finally told me the story, I was pissed. I was angry that my best friend had kept this secret from me, and I was pissed at my wife because she didn’t even tell me that someone had taken my son.”
 

I watch him shake his head, and place his hands flat against the desk.
 

“She told me that seeing that woman fall to the ground was the worst thing she’s ever seen. She hated herself for taking that woman’s life, but she would do it again to protect her family. It was eating at her for years before it forced her to shut down. Jase, you need to make sure Wynter talks about what happened. She needs to or she will end up just like Avelyn did. Women process this shit differently than we do, and that’s why we need to protect them.”
 

I nod my head in agreement and continue to listen.
 

“I let your ole’ lady pull the trigger because I could see it in her eyes that she needed to be the one to do it, to get over what he’s taken from her. He’s taken her sense of security, and the only way to get it back sometimes is to do the unspeakable. I know you would have done it for her, but she would probably still be looking over her shoulder at every turn. She’s a strong woman, and I’m glad you two didn’t let me or anyone else gets between you.”
 

“You know I will. Thanks Prez. I wish I could take her place right now, but I know she wouldn’t let me if I tried.” He chuckles and nods his head.
 

“Those women are a blessing and a curse.” I laugh. Fuck yeah they are.
 

“Do you think Henley can help us get custody of Carsyn?” I ask hopeful. Since I met that little girl, she’s slowly gotten me wrapped around her little finger and it makes me excited about having a kid of my own with Wynter. Shit, thinking about it, I can’t wait for that day to come.
 

“Yeah, we talked about it last night and I have her doing everything in her power to get you guy’s custody. It might be a long process and things will have to be done in order to get it, but I’m sure it will go rather smoothly.”
 

Standing up, I walk up to him and stick my hand out. He takes it and shakes it, before pulling me into a hug. “You and your brothers are like family to me and my boys. I will always do everything I can for you, just like your old man would do for my boys. It’s the least I can do.”
 

He pats my back, and there’s a knock at the door.
 

“Come in.,” he yells out. I stand by the door and watch as Henley comes in. She walks straight over to Prez, and kisses him on the cheek.
 

“Hi Jase,” she smiles.
 

“Hey, is Wynter in the clubhouse?” I ask. I want to go find my girl and take her home. Well I guess to my apartment, until I can find us somewhere more permanent.
 

“Yup, she’s waiting outside for you.” She looks at Prez and I can see the love she has for him. It almost makes me want to gag, like when my brother and Anslie look at each other like that.

“Thanks for everything Prez. We really appreciate it. And thank you Henley.” They both smile at me, and I turn and walk out the door.