Authors: Richard Adams
" 'Whatever are you doing, Yona?' asked Hufsa in astonishment.
" 'Singing to the moon,' answered Yona. 'All hedgehogs have to sing to the moon to make the slugs come. Surely you know that?
" 'O Slug-a-Moon, O Slug-a-Moon,
O grant thy faithful hedgehog's boon!'
" 'What a frightful noise!' said El-ahrairah and indeed it was. 'Let's get on quickly before he brings all the elil round us.' And on they went.
"After a time they drew near the pond on the edge of the wood. As they approached it they heard a squawking and splashing and then they saw Hawock the pheasant scuttering about in the water, with his long tail feathers floating out behind him.
" 'Whatever has happened?' said Hufsa. 'Hawock, have you been shot?'
" 'No, no,' replied Hawock. 'I always go swimming in the full moon. It makes my tail grow longer and, besides, my head wouldn't stay red, white and green without swimming. But you must know that, Hufsa, surely? Everyone knows that.'
" 'The truth is, he doesn't like other animals to catch him at it,' whispered El-ahrairah. 'Let's go on.'
"A little further on they came to an old well by a big oak tree. The farmer had filled it up long ago, but the mouth looked very deep and black in the moonlight.
" 'Let's have a rest,' said El-ahrairah, 'just for a short time.'
"As he spoke, a most curious-looking creature came out of the grass. It looked something like a rabbit, but even in the moonlight they could see that it had a red tail and long green ears. In its mouth it was carrying the end of one of the white sticks that men burn. It was Rabscuttle, but not even Hufsa could recognize him. He had found some sheep-dip powder at the farm and sat in it to make his tail red. His ears were festooned with trails of bryony and the white stick was making him feel ill.
" 'Frith preserve us!' said El-ahrairah. 'What can it be? Let's only hope it isn't one of the Thousand!' He leaped up, ready to run. 'Who are you?' he asked, trembling.
"Rabscuttle spat out the white stick.
" 'So!' he said commandingly. 'So you have seen me, El-ahrairah! Many rabbits live out their lives and die, but few see me. Few or none! I am one of the rabbit messengers of Lord Frith, who go about the earth secretly by day and return nightly to his golden palace! He is even now awaiting me on the other side of the world and I must go to him swiftly, through the heart of the earth! Farewell, El-ahrairah!'
"The strange rabbit leaped over the edge of the well and disappeared into the darkness below.
" 'We have seen what we should not!' said El-ahrairah in an awe-stricken voice. 'How dreadful is this place! Let us go quickly!'
"They hurried on and presently they came to Prince Rainbow's field of carrots. How many they stole I cannot say; but of course, as you know, El-ahrairah is a great prince and no doubt he used powers unknown to you and me. But my grandfather always said that before morning the field was stripped bare. The carrots were hidden down a deep hole in the bank beside the wood and El-ahrairah and Hufsa made their way home. El-ahrairah collected two or three followers and stayed underground with them all day, but Hufsa went out in the afternoon without saying where he was going.
"That evening, as El-ahrairah and his people began to silflay under a fine red sky, Prince Rainbow came over the fields. Behind him were two great black dogs.
" 'El-ahrairah,' he said, 'you are under arrest.'
" 'What for?' asked El-ahrairah.
" 'You know very well what for,' said Prince Rainbow. 'Let me have no more of your tricks and insolence, El-ahrairah. Where are the carrots?'
" 'If I am under arrest,' said El-ahrairah, 'may I be told what for? It is not fair to tell me I am under arrest and then to ask me questions.'
" 'Come, come, El-ahrairah,' said Prince Rainbow, 'you are merely wasting time. Tell me where the carrots are and I will only send you to the great North and not kill you.'
" 'Prince Rainbow,' said El-ahrairah, 'for the third time, may I know for what I am under arrest?'
" 'Very well,' said Prince Rainbow, 'if this is the way you want to die, El-ahrairah, you shall have the full process of law. You are under arrest for stealing my carrots. Are you seriously asking for a trial? I warn you that I have direct evidence and it will go ill with you.'
"By this time all El-ahrairah's people were crowding round, as near as they dared for the dogs. Only Rabscuttle was nowhere to be seen. He had spent the whole day moving the carrots to another secret hole and he was now hiding because he could not get his tail white again.
" 'Yes, I would like a trial,' said El-ahrairah, 'and I would like to be judged by a jury of animals. For it is not right, Prince Rainbow, that you should both accuse me and be the judge as well.'
" 'A jury of animals you shall have,' said Prince Rainbow. 'A jury of elil, El-ahrairah. For a jury of rabbits would refuse to convict you, in spite of the evidence.'
"To everyone's surprise, El-ahrairah immediately replied that he would be content with a jury of elil: and Prince Rainbow said that he would bring them that night. El-ahrairah was sent down his hole and the dogs were put on guard outside. None of his people was allowed to see him, although many tried.
"Up and down the hedges and copses the news spread that El-ahrairah was on trial for his life and that Prince Rainbow was going to bring him before a jury of elil. Animals came crowding in. Fu Inlé, Prince Rainbow returned with the elil--two badgers, two foxes, two stoats, an owl and a cat. El-ahrairah was brought up and placed between the dogs. The elil sat staring at him and their eyes glittered in the moon. They licked their lips: and the dogs muttered that they had been promised the task of carrying out the sentence. There were a great many animals--rabbits and others--and every one of them felt sure that this time it was all up with El-ahrairah.
" 'Now,' said Prince Rainbow, 'let us begin. It will not take long. Where is Hufsa?'
"Then Hufsa came out, bowing and bobbing his head, and he told the elil that El-ahrairah had come the night before, when he was quietly chewing pellets, and terrified him into going with him to steal Prince Rainbow's carrots. He had wanted to refuse, but he had been too much frightened. The carrots were hidden in a hole that he could show them. He had been forced to do what he did, but the next day he had gone as quickly as possible to tell Prince Rainbow, whose loyal servant he was.
" 'We will recover the carrots later,' said Prince Rainbow. 'Now, El-ahrairah, have you any evidence to call or anything to say? Make haste.'
" 'I would like to ask the witness some questions,' said El-ahrairah; and the elil agreed that this was only fair.
" 'Now, Hufsa,' said El-ahrairah, 'can we hear a little more about this journey that you and I are supposed to have made? For really I can remember nothing about it at all. You say we went out of the hole and set off in the night. What happened then?'
" 'Why, El-ahrairah,' said Hufsa, 'you can't possibly have forgotten. We came along by the ditch, and don't you remember that we saw a hedgehog sitting on a box singing a song to the moon?'
" 'A hedgehog doing
what
?' said one of the badgers.
" 'Singing a song to the moon,' said Hufsa eagerly. They do that, you know, to make the slugs come. He had rose petals stuck all over him and he was waving his paws and--'
" 'Now, steady, steady,' said El-ahrairah kindly, 'I wouldn't like you to say anything you don't mean. Poor fellow,' he added to the jury, 'he really believes these things he says, you know. He doesn't mean any harm, but--'
" 'But he
was
,' shouted Hufsa. 'He was singing, "O Slug-a-Moon! O Slug-a-Moon! O grant--" '
" 'What the hedgehog sang is not evidence,' said El-ahrairah. 'Really, one is inclined to wonder what is. Well, all right. We saw a hedgehog covered with roses, singing a song on a box. What happened then?'
" 'Well,' said Hufsa, 'then we went on and came to the pond, where we saw a pheasant.'
" 'Pheasant, eh?' said one of the foxes. 'I wish I'd seen it. What was it doing?'
" 'It was swimming round and round in the water,' said Hufsa.
" 'Wounded, eh?' said the fox.
" 'No, no,' said Hufsa. 'They all do that, to make their tails grow longer. I'm surprised you don't know.'
" 'To make
what
?' said the fox.
" 'To make their tails grow longer,' said Hufsa sulkily. 'He said so himself.'
" 'You've only had this stuff for a very short time,' said El-ahrairah to the elil. 'It takes a bit of getting used to. Look at me. I've been forced to live with it for the last two months, day in and day out. I've been as kind and understanding as I can, but apparently just to my own harm.'
"A silence fell. El-ahrairah, with an air of fatherly patience, turned back to the witness.
" 'My memory is so bad,' he said. 'Do go on.'
" 'Well, El-ahrairah,' said Hufsa, 'you're pretending very cleverly, but even you won't be able to say you've forgotten what happened next. A huge, terrifying rabbit, with a red tail and green ears, came out of the grass. He had a white stick in his mouth and he plunged into the ground down a great hole. He told us he was going through the middle of the earth to see Lord Frith on the other side.'
"This time not one of the elil said a word. They were staring at Hufsa and shaking their heads.
" 'They're all mad, you know,' whispered one of the stoats, 'nasty little beasts. They'll say anything when they're cornered. But this one is the worst I've ever heard. How much longer have we got to stay here? I'm hungry.'
"Now El-ahrairah had known beforehand that while elil detest all rabbits, they would dislike most the one who looked the biggest fool. That was why he had agreed to a jury of elil. A jury of rabbits might have tried, to get to the bottom of Hufsa's story; but not the elil, for they hated and despised the witness and wanted to be off hunting as soon as they could.
" 'So it comes to this,' said El-ahrairah. 'We saw a hedgehog covered with roses, singing a song: and then we saw a perfectly healthy pheasant swimming round and round the pond: and then we saw a rabbit with a red tail, green ears and a white stick, and he jumped straight down a deep well. Is that right?'
" 'Yes,' said Hufsa.
" 'And then we stole the carrots?'
" 'Yes.'
" 'Were they purple with green spots?'
" 'Were what purple with green spots?'
" 'The carrots.'
" 'Well, you know they weren't, El-ahrairah. They were the ordinary color. They're down the hole!' shouted Hufsa desperately. 'Down the hole! Go and look!'
"The court adjourned while Hufsa led Prince Rainbow to the hole. They found no carrots and returned.
" 'I've been underground all day,' said El-ahrairah, 'and I can prove it. I ought to have been asleep, but it's very difficult when m'learned friend--well, never mind. I simply mean that obviously I couldn't have been out moving carrots or anything else. If there ever
were
any carrots,' he added. 'But I've nothing more to say.'
" 'Prince Rainbow,' said the cat, 'I hate all rabbits. But I don't see how we can possibly say that it's been proved that that rabbit took your carrots. The witness is obviously out of his mind--mad as the mist and snow--and the prisoner will have to be released.' They all agreed.
" 'You had better go quickly,' said Prince Rainbow to El-ahrairah. 'Go down your hole, El-ahrairah, before I hurt you myself.'
" 'I will, my lord,' said El-ahrairah. 'But may I beg you to remove that rabbit you sent among us, for he troubles us with his foolishness?'