Wanderlove (25 page)

It took a moment for that to sink in, what he’d just said to me. “Wait, you mean some of your siblings knew me? Which ones?”

“Rex and Baro. Cam and Molly never met you before this life.”

“So why do Rex and Baro want to explain anything to me?” I asked, confused. “Why can’t you just tell me?”

In my eyes, the only person who had any amount of explaining to do was Gabe, not that it would make things right or that I would feel any differently. But I definitely didn’t see how his brothers fit into this.

“They want to make sure things are explained in a way that doesn’t sabotage you. . .and others.”

I shook my head. “I don’t understand.”

Gabe sighed. “They don’t trust me to tell you what needs to be said. If they had their way, nothing would be said to you at all.” His tone lowered and he sounded almost bitter. “If they had their way, I would just let you go on living your life believing that I wanted you to forget me. That I didn’t want you to ever remember.”

“Why would they want that?”

“Because the implications of telling you. . .” Gabe paused. “I shouldn’t say any more until we’re all together. They’re too afraid I’ll mess it up.”

I was entirely too confused by this conversation, but I decided to accept it for now. I figured I’d know soon enough what the big deal was, anyway.

Although it had taken me nearly two hours to walk to this beach, the drive home only took about ten minutes. We both remained quiet for the rest of the way.

I was suddenly feeling famished. After thinking about it, I realized I hadn’t actually eaten much lately. My hollow stomach grumbled at the thought of food.

After pulling into the enormous driveway, Gabe parked directly in front of the house and walked around his truck to open my door for me. It was strange, the things I noticed about him that never seemed to change throughout the span of time. Almost instantly, hundreds of different images flashed through my mind of Gabe opening doors for me, pulling out chairs for me, carrying me over rain puddles. I supposed he’d always been chivalrous; it wasn’t just a façade.

He offered me his hand to help me down and I took it. But he didn’t let go after I was out of the truck. He continued holding my hand, leading me around the circular driveway and towards the entryway of his home. As we walked, I eyed my small hand enwrapped in his large one. It looked like it belonged there. Uncomfortably, I pushed the thought aside.

Molly opened the door before Gabe could put his key into the lock. She wore a bright smile, but as soon as she caught sight of me, her expression soured and her shoulders drooped.

After a long groan, she asked, “Why’d you have to bring
her
with you?”

She didn’t wait for Gabe’s answer. I figured her question was rhetorical, anyway. Instead, she simply walked away, leaving us standing alone in the foyer.

Gabe met my uneasy gaze. “Don’t worry about her,” he said reassuringly. “Moll’s just being a brat because she’s friends with Anni.”

“I gathered that much, thanks.”

“She doesn’t know half of what’s going on, Lo.”

“Whatever she knows is still more than I do,” I pointed out. Before he had a chance to respond, Cam entered the room.

“Lola, what’s up?” He grinned. “Come to join us for dinner?”

I smiled, relieved to see a friendly face. And he only made me feel more at ease by enveloping me in a bear hug as soon as he reached me.

Gabe coughed after a few seconds. “Cam, I need you to go get Baro and Rex. Tell them to meet us in the living room.”

“Sure thing,” he said. “But this conversation better not take all night. I’ve been helping Baro cook for the last three hours and I’m
starving
.”

As soon as Cam departed, Gabe tugged me along to the living room. “Sit,” he instructed, motioning me towards the sofa. “This might take a while and it’s probably going to be confusing.”

“I don’t think I can bear any more confusion.”

“Well, at least my brothers will do a better job of explaining than I could. I wouldn’t even know where to begin.”

“You make all of this sound so serious.”

“That’s because it is serious, Lola.”

I took a seat, sinking into the plush leather of the sofa. My eyes wandered over the countless mosaics as we waited, admiring the tiles and designs.

I couldn’t fathom anything involving myself that could be so serious and so it was hard for me to take it as seriously as Gabe did. Granted, I didn’t have any gypsy sight or intuition and I couldn’t read a palm to save my life. All in all, I didn’t have anything special to offer. Therefore, the possibility of something hidden in my mind that was worth all this trouble was unimaginable.

Gabe would have the answers. My gaze drifted over the mosaics and back to him. He’d remained standing by the window. He was looming over the glass panes, staring out into night sky. He seemed to be on edge.

“Lola Moori, I have sincerely missed you, draga.”

Baro Constantin walked into the room, Rex Constantin following not far behind him. I stood as Baro neared me. He towered over me, dwarfing me with his height. His size was intimidating. I offered him my hand to shake. He took it, but then pulled me into an embrace. Baro hugged me tightly, almost as if he’d known me forever. But then I guess he had known me forever.

Baro stepped back and looked me over. “I swear you become lovelier with each lifetime you surpass.”

I smiled, charmed by the twinkle in his resilient gray eyes. Although he was massive, Baro’s eyes seemed friendly and unthreatening. Either that, or perhaps maybe he was simply familiar to me.

“Thank you,” I said in response to his compliment. Baro stepped back and Rex approached me now, slowly. “Hello again, Lola,” he greeted me quietly.

It surprised me to discover how incredibly handsome Rex Constantin was. Most people only referred to him as callous or cold. That could be true; he certainly didn’t seem very friendly, but I couldn’t help comparing Rex to Gabe. More than any of his siblings, Rex resembled Gabe the most. There was one exception, however. Rex was the first Contantin I’d noticed with eyes a different color than gray. Instead, his eyes were a dark amber hue.

“Of course, you don’t remember me or Rex, do you?” Baro asked.

I looked over both of them in contemplation, trying to distinguish either of them from my recently returned memories.

Baro shook his head. “You won’t be able to recognize either of us that way. Most people naturally look for similarities in appearance in order to identify someone. But gypsies are an internal species. They look for similarities through the mind’s sight. You have to look for the mannerisms, the way we hold ourselves. Look at the auras surrounding our heads, the stories within our eyes. Now try seeing him from your mind. Come here.” Baro reached for my arm and pulled me directly in front of Rex.

“Close your eyes,” he told me. “Don’t even look at him. Instead use your mind’s sight and get the feel of
who
he is.”

I heard Gabe’s voice in the background saying, “She’s not ready for this, Bar.”

“Shut up, Gabe,” he ordered.

Suddenly, Baro’s voice was behind me now. “Who is the man who stands before you, Lola? What do you feel when you’re near him, what energy surrounds him? Open your eyes now.”

I opened my eyes, meeting Rex’s gaze. I wasn’t expecting anything out of the ordinary to happen. But suddenly an image of a soldier flashed before my eyes. Or maybe nobility? As quickly as it came, it departed. I tried searching for something more afterwards. And then several images flashed through my mind.

I remembered there was a woman who had scarred Rex for eternity. I could sense this woman was the cause of his bitterness and distrustful nature.

A distant phrase filled my head.
“I’ll always hold a deep respect for you, Liliana Moori. You’re one of few women who will ever hear me say that.”

I shivered, feeling a spark of recognition. I looked over Rex, remembering who he was. We hadn’t always liked each other; I instinctively knew this. At one time, we each formed opinions of one another based on the wrong impressions. For a long time, I had detested this man entirely. But my opinion of him changed, somehow. I began to understand him and love him like he was my own family.

“
Stefan
,” I breathed, the name filling my mind.

Baro patted me on the back, almost knocking me over. “Well done, draga.”

I watched as a flicker of emotion sparked within Rex’s eyes. I knew he would never be one to offer affection. But I also knew that despite his hardened exterior, he needed it.

I hugged him tightly. He stiffened for a moment, but eventually accepted my embrace. He hugged me back, saying, “I’ve also missed you.”

I turned around, looking at Baro. “And I know you as Dragos,” I said, smiling.

He made a little bow before me. “Very good. However, I always hated that name. Baro suits me better, don’t you think?”

I heard Rex mumble under his breath, “Arrogant peacock.”

Baro only grinned. “It’s taken from the word
barosan
,” Baro explained in an aside to me.

“Ah, I see.” I actually thought Baro did encompass the qualities of a natural leader. I could very easily picture him at the head of a tribe. And then I had another image appear before me of Baro as a real
barosan
. In the image, Baro gave out orders and wore the traditional red sash around the waist of his pants, which represented leadership.

“This is so freaky,” I said to no one in particular. “I remember some things, but I don’t remember everything. I just
know
that I know both of you. And I also know what kind of people you are.”

“Then. . .you do not have all your memories yet?” Baro asked in a tentative voice.

“It’s strange. I believe I do have them, but they’re all tucked away, as if each were a folder within a filing cabinet. When something triggers a memory, one of the folders is withdrawn and I begin to look through the file, remembering more and more.”

Baro nodded. “Soon it will become easier. Soon you will have all of your memories at hand. And that is what we must speak to you about tonight.” Baro paused, sighing. “It will be difficult to explain, I fear.”

I sat back down on the sofa. Baro and Rex sat across from me in separate chairs.

Gabe remained by the window, a solemn expression still occupying his face.

“What is it that everyone is so afraid of?” I prepared myself to listen and be open to whatever they had to say.

Baro began speaking, his voice lulling into that of a storyteller. “It was a very long time ago when it happened. Unfortunately, a curse was placed upon your memories, hindering you of all capabilities of remembering anything about your past lives.”

“A curse?” I asked, surprised. The possibility had never even occurred to me. There were so few gypsies who could perform curses, much less perform a curse that lasted the span of several lifetimes. “Who would do that to me?”

Baro and Rex glanced at each other for a moment before Baro decided to speak again. “I suppose it will do no harm to tell you at this point. It was Zetta Moori who cursed you, under your father’s orders, of course.”

Bewilderment swept over me as I thought of my loving aunt. “Auntie Zetta would never do anything to hurt me,” I said.

“She didn’t do it to hurt you, draga,” Baro insisted. “She did it to keep you safe.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I know. And I’ll try my best to make sense of it. But I must warn you now that I won’t be able to answer all of your questions. There are some things that simply cannot be said aloud to you. Can you accept this, Lola?”

I nodded. “Just tell me what you can.”

“Zetta is one of the only people who could perform a curse that strong. It is in your makeup to remember your past lives. The
Roms
have had this ability for centuries. She was taking something away from you that went against your very own nature. It was the reason she stayed close to you, to keep the curse strong.” Baro paused, choosing his next words very carefully. Finally, he said, “She kept your memories from you because there is something hidden within your mind, something that
must
stay hidden.”

“A hidden memory?”

“Yes.”

“But why must it stay hidden?”

He paused again, searching for the right words. “Because. . .once it is unleashed, the mind readers will be able to listen. They will be able to know what you know. And should those memories ever come to light, God help us all. Especially you, Lola. Because even if the best mind readers can’t pick your brain for all of the details they need, you will still become the greatest threat to many and in danger from those who think they can use you.

“If people know what’s inside your mind, you will be undoubtedly captured, tortured even, in order to release what you know. And believe me, if what you know gets out, it’s not just you who will be in trouble. We will all be in great danger. In fact, the whole damned world would be in peril.”

I stared at Baro blankly. “Well, that was quite a mouthful,” I mentioned a few moments later. And then as what he said started to sink in more, my voice became a little whiny as I asked him, “But why do
I
have to keep whatever this thing is hidden? Why can’t someone else hide it in their mind?”

“Your mind is not a safe deposit box, Lola,” Baro told me. “We can’t just take out what doesn’t belong there. It’s a memory. It’s your memory, nonetheless. And unfortunately, you were the one who was chosen for this.”

“Baro,” Rex grumbled.

“Damn,” Baro muttered. “I didn’t mean to touch on that subject.”

“What do you mean
chosen
?” I asked.

“That is one of the questions I cannot answer, Lola.”

“Why?”

“Because the answer may lead to your remembrance, and I will
not
be the cause of the horrific aftermath, which would undoubtedly ensue.”

It was all so completely and utterly frustrating. They were telling me not to remember, but couldn’t explain why-because it might bring about my remembering. It was a vicious cycle, if there ever was one. Though it shamed me, I really wanted to know whatever it was they knew. A foggy blanket covered my mind. It was an oppressive and suffocating thing. I desperately wished I could remove it and allow my memories to crystalize into perspective. It was like fighting to breathe again.