Victim of Love (8 page)

“You know what I think?”

Beck let out an exasperated sigh. “No, Olsen. By all means, tell me what you think.”

“All right. I think that you don’t like biscuits at
all
.”

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Beck shook his head. “Okay, I’m confused now. Are the biscuits vaginas in this metaphor?”

“What I’m saying is—”

“I
know
what you’re saying, Olsen.” He pointed to his temple. “My little brain managed to read between the lines of your oh-so-subtle accusation.”

Shit. Five minutes in and I’d managed to steer the conversation in the one direction Kamal had warned me to stay clear of. But here I was, just blurting it out.

“This conversation about my evil home-wrecking ways couldn’t have waited until morning?” Beck moved closer to me. “It was so important you had to follow me here? Come to my room in the middle of the night?”

My face heated. He was right. I was such a fuck up. I looked like an idiot for coming here. I must have been out of my mind. “Look, just bear in mind that Townsend is sensitive about Pippa. That’s all I really came to say. I’ll leave you alone.”

I started toward the door.

“You know, Olsen, you should have more confidence in yourself.”

I turned back. “What?”

“You worked up the balls to come here, but you lack the courage to say what you really want.”

My pulse quickened. “I wanted to tell you that Townsend—”

“No, you didn’t.” He moved toward me. “You didn’t come here to defend your friend’s honor. Tell the truth.”

He was still coming at me, forcing me to step back until I hit the wall.

Stopping directly before me, he grinned. “Scared of me?”

“Of course not.”

“You look scared.”

“I’m not scared of you, Beck.”

“Just scared to tell the truth.”

I forced a chuckle. “The way
you
tell the truth?”

That got me a wide grin. “Life isn’t gonna hand you things, Olsen. If you see something you like...” Fingers drifted up my thigh, over the hem of my shorts. His lips moved to my ear. “You have to be a man and
take
it.”

My stomach trembled, body on sensory overload, making me short of breath. And devoid of words.

Beck leaned back and looked me in the eye. “Nothing to say now? You were so
chatty
a moment ago.”

“What do you want me to say?”

“Tell the truth,” he whispered.

“I...I don’t know what the truth is,” I managed.

“Yes, you do.” His fingers drifted higher, close to my hip. “Say it.”

The spicy scent of him flooded me. The only thing saving me from complete abandon was that stubborn part deep inside that hated losing control of myself. Ignoring my pounding heart and throbbing cock, I grabbed his chin. “You want my truth? Give me
yours
first, Beck.”

His smile was sly, eyes darting to my lips before meeting my challenging stare. “What is it you want to hear?” His fingers were still toying with me, making little circles just below my hip. “You want to hear that I prefer sausage to biscuits?” He pressed closer to me, then shoved me hard into the wall, making me gasp when his body made full contact. My hand fell from his face as I went limp, losing the fight.

His lips moved to my other ear. “Or do you want me to tell you I didn’t really have a blackout last night. And that I could fill a trophy case with the boners I’ve had thinking about that kiss.”

A small groan escaped me, but I managed to push out the words, “So you lied.”

“Yes, Olsen. I lied.”

“Because your sister doesn’t—”

“My
sister
doesn’t need to know everything I do. I also snorted a line of coke one time off the hipbone of a drag queen called Starlight in Vegas. I didn’t tell her about that, either.”

“So you’re comparing liking guys to snorting coke.”

“It’s your turn.” Now he grabbed my chin, his pretty eyes boring into me. “Tell the truth. Why did you come here tonight? Why did you come to my room?”

Those eyes had me paralyzed. I could feel his hardness through the soft material of my shorts.

“Say it. Say ‘Beck, I followed you to your room because...’”

“I...”

“Say it,” he whispered.

“I followed you to your room because...”

He nodded. “Go on.”

“Because...”

“Because you wanted my hands on you?” His fingers released my chin, trailing down my neck and over my shoulder.

I stared back at him. I was starting to sweat.

He gave me another small shove against the wall, pinning me. “
Say
it.” His hand drifted to my inner thigh then dragged upward, palming my erection.

“Shit,” I hissed. “Okay.”

His touch traveled lower and cupped my balls, then slowly up again, tracing the line of my erection, weakening me with pleasure. “Okay, what?”

I could hardly breathe, much less talk. “I followed you to your room because I wanted your hands on me,” I huffed out in a single breath.

“And the truth shall set you free.” He tugged open my fly and his hand dipped inside my briefs. “So this is what you wanted?”

My eyelids fluttered and I moaned as he gripped my cock and stroked it fast, making me see stars. Was this what I wanted?
No! This isn’t me. I want kissing and foreplay and long getting to know you conversations and...
“Yes,” I growled. “God, yes. This is what I wanted.”

Beck breathed heavily against my neck as he jerked me like his life depended on it. “You wanted my hands on you? On your cock?”

All the blood had left my brain, so I simply mumbled, groaning.

“You only had to ask,” he whispered, nipping my ear with his teeth as he stroked me faster. “You only had to say to me, Beck, I want you to grab my cock and jerk me off ‘til I come all over your hand.”

“Oh,
fuck
.”

The back of my head hit the wall as my spine arched. Orgasm ripped through my body so hard and fast I felt knocked outside of myself, floating somewhere overhead as my cock gushed into Beck’s pumping fist. I wasn’t even aware I was making noise until his other hand clamped over my mouth while he milked the last of it out of me, weakening my legs until I slid halfway down the wall.

A knock came on the inner door, the one that led to the bungalow, and we both froze, sharing a wide-eyed stare.

“Beck, you in there?” It was Laurie.

Still holding my gaze, Beck held a finger to his lips, signaling for silence. “Yeah, I’m here, you okay, hon?”

“Yeah, I’m sorry for mothering you, I just couldn’t sleep until I knew you hadn’t drowned in the ocean. Can I come in a minute?”

I was already zipping my shorts and heading for the exterior door before Beck began shooing me toward it. “Just a second Laurie, gotta put some clothes on,” Beck said.

As I reached for the knob, someone knocked from outside, and I reeled back, bumping into Beck.

“Hey, Beck? It’s Townsend. Do you have a minute?”

I spun around and looked at Beck.

“Oh, fuck,” he whispered. He glanced back and forth between both doors, then looked at me. “One second, Townsend,” he called out, then grabbed my arm, dragging me to the rear of the room. “Here. Get in the closet.”

My jaw dropped. “Oh, you did
not
just say that to me.”

“Please, Olsen.” He tugged open the doors of a wooden structure in the corner. “The irony is not lost on me.”

“This isn’t even a closet!” I whispered. “It’s a cabinet. Look, there’s pillows and blankets and shit in there.”

“Just...take them out and pile them on the floor. Quick.”

I helped him clear the items out. There was a shelf running vertically across halfway down so in order to hide I’d have to squat into a ball on the bottom. This was ridiculous.

“Go on!” he ordered. “Get in.”

“Wait a minute, wait a minute! Can’t we just tell them I was here hanging out, talking? They don’t know any different.”

“You’ve got a stain on your crotch.”

I looked down. “Oh. Okay. Closet.”

I hunched down and climbed inside, having to hug my knees to fit. Beck closed the doors on me, leaving me in darkness. It smelled like cedar and fabric softener, and I had to close my eyes and pretend I was somewhere else, sitting on a beach or in an open field, so I wouldn’t have a claustrophobic panic attack.

“Hey,” I heard Laurie say. “Were you exercising? You’re all sweaty.”

“Just a second, Townsend’s at the door.”

“Townsend? Why?”

“I think he wants to yell at me. I’ll deal with it.”

“Why would he want to...”

Laurie’s words trailed off as I heard the other door open, then Townsend’s familiar voice. “Oh, hey, Laurie. Didn’t realize you were here.”

“I’m popular tonight,” Beck said. “What can I do for you, big guy?”

I winced in my box of shame. Townsend hated being called ‘big guy’.

“I didn’t realize you weren’t alone. We can talk tomorrow,” Townsend said.

“Look,” Beck said, “I know why you’re here, I already heard that I pissed you off tonight. I respect you and your relationship with Pippa and I’ll watch my step in the future. Okay? That about cover it?”

“Um...oh. Ah, yeah. I guess that’s it,” Townsend said. “Thanks.”

I almost laughed, but covered my mouth. Beck was speaking a mile a minute, trying to rush Townsend out of there.

“Good then. Laurie, I didn’t drown. I’m fine. And I’m exhausted. See you in the morning?”

Laurie chuckled. “Okay, boys. Goodnight, Townsend. Night, bro.”

“Goodnight,” Townsend said. “I’ll ah, see you both tomorrow.”

I heard the doors squeak open again. One by one, they closed. Then there was silence. I waited for Beck to let me out of the closet. I could hear him shuffling around out there, but he didn’t open the doors. Growing frustrated, I listened hard to be sure no one else was there.

“Hey!” I whispered as loud as I could.

“I just want to wait until Townsend’s gone back to his room,” came Beck’s voice from the other side.

“Well can we do that with me
outside
of the closet? I feel like elf on the shelf in here.”

The double doors opened, Beck grinning down at me. “That is one big fucking elf. What has Santa been feeding you?”

I climbed out, groaning as my knees creaked.

“You better get out of here,” he said. “Before Kamal decides to show up or something.”

“Yeah,” I agreed. While I hadn’t expected poetry and kisses, his quick dismissal of me stung a bit. I headed for the door. “Okay, see you tomorrow.”

Beck walked me to the door. As I stepped outside, he gave me a quick, hard slap on the ass. “Later,” he said, then went back inside and shut the door.

I grinned as I made my way covertly back to the rear entrance of the bungalow. Okay, so it wasn’t a kiss. But something about that swat on the ass made me warm and fuzzy. There was affection in it, a playfulness, and it was a relief because it meant that despite the night’s craziness and...other things...it wasn’t going to be awkward between us. I hoped.

I wasn’t fooling myself. I knew Beck wasn’t boyfriend material. But I was still itching to get him under my microscope. I wanted to know more about him. He wasn’t the type of person I’d normally be friends with, but that he was so different from me somehow made him more intriguing.

That I was accepting of the fact that I’d messed around with this guy, and probably wasn’t going to get any more than that, surprised me. I’d never received a hand job from someone I wasn’t already dating, so had just experienced my first real meaningless hookup. And I wasn’t plagued with self-loathing or curled up in a ball waiting for the phone to ring. I was okay with taking it for what it was, and that made me feel very grown up. Very
in control
.

Which was nice, because Beck had more or less stolen my control this evening, snatching it from me with such calculated ease it should have made me feel weak.

But I didn’t feel weak. I felt fucking fantastic. Which likely had something to do with the meteoric sexual release, but either way, I went to bed truly relaxed and devoid of anxiety for the first time in ages.

Unfortunately, my subconscious was still a hopeless romantic, and my dreams were riddled with passionate scenes involving Beck. In one of them we were rolling around in wet sand as waves crashed over us,
From Here to Eternity
style as we made out and tore at each other’s clothing.

But the dream became nightmarish as an undertow began dragging Beck away from me, out to sea. I clung to his hands, trying to pull him back as the ocean grew more violent.
Don’t let go, Olsen,
he said.
I need you
.

Then for some reason Laurie was standing beside us in the lab coat she wore at work, seemingly unaffected by the turbulent waves as she filled a rack of test tubes with sea water.
Laurie
, I said, still clinging to Beck’s slippery hands.
Help me! Help me pull him in!

Just let him go
, she said.
He’s going to leave anyway. He always does
.

Beck’s fingers slipped from mine as a wave took him. I could still see his head, bobbing in the water, grinning at me, no longer my passionate lover, just plain old, smarmy Beck again.
Later,
he said, then sank beneath the stormy waves, and was gone.

Chapter Four

The Big Bang

“Hey, you up? We had breakfast delivered.”

I smiled at Kamal, who peeked his head cautiously into my room. “Yeah, sounds good. I’ll be right out.”

I’d been up for a while, actually, but while I’d normally have just stumbled out of bed and munched down a muffin, today I felt the need to look good, so had already showered, dressed, and made sure my hair wasn’t sticking up like a strawberry blond scrub brush before presenting myself to the world. Or rather, presenting myself to Beck, because who was I kidding? Even if I never got
his hands on me
again, I could at least have the satisfaction of looking good and feeling confident in his presence.

We were heading down to the beach today, where the gang wanted to take advantage of some of the recreational water activities, but I was secretly planning to bail out at the last minute because I really just wanted to sit on the beach and read the book I’d brought. But even so, Beck would see me. So I’d put on my favorite swim trunks and a cool tee shirt I thought made my chest look bigger.