Used (Unlovable, #1) (Unlovable Series) (41 page)

BOOK: Used (Unlovable, #1) (Unlovable Series)
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“So you want me to be your …” She leaves that hanging in the air between us.

I want you to be my everything.
I’ve wanted that from the get-go, but since she’d been violated, I was trying to give her time to heal. I know saying any of that will send her running, so I put the ball back in her court for now. “What do you want to be?”

She glances back down and studies her hands for a moment. “I don’t think I’m ready for a relationship,” she says, her tone regretful.

“You remember what I said about touching you while you were with other guys?” She nods. “If you agree to … explore this with me, no other guys. I won’t share you.”

Her eyes find mine again, and she demands, “What about you?”

“What about me?”

Her mouth drops slightly. “Every time I see you, you’re with a different girl.”

“Denver, I haven’t been with anyone since we met at that very first party.” She raises her eyebrows slowly. “Other than that lapse in judgment the other night,” I concede. I’m still kicking my own ass for that one. “But I didn’t have sex with that girl.”

A hurt look washes over her features. “She was naked, Ransom.”

“Was I?”

She bites her lip and shakes her head
no
.

“Like I said, I didn’t have sex with her.”

She accuses, “I’ve seen you—the different girls from the parties, the Baby Buckle Bunnies—”

“Baby Buckle Bunnies?” I chuckle.

She throws her head back and snickers. “It’s what I call the groupies who follow the college circuit and not the pro. You know, ‘cause they’re Buckle Bunnies in training?”

I can’t help but grin because that’s exactly what they are, which is exactly why I’d never touch one, but she doesn’t know about my rules … yet. “It is very fitting. But just because you saw me talking with those girls doesn’t mean I was with them. I’m not lying to you. And think about it, I have no reason to lie, even if I had been that was before you.” I pause to bring this conversation back into focus. “If you do this with me, I’m yours. Only yours.”

A look of disbelief mars her features. “Why me? I mean, we’ve only shared a couple of kisses—” I give her a look, and she blushes and adds, “—incredible, unforgettable kisses. But I heard you’ve never been with the same girl twice, so why are you willing to change that for me?”

That’s a loaded question. I never thought I’d meet my equal this early in my life. Then, after I was already in deep, I found out about her reputation, and that sent me into a tailspin that had me pushing her away. Bottom line, none of that mattered. I still wanted her, still
want
her.
Why her? Because she’s everything I need, and more than I ever hoped for.
But she can never be truly mine until she believes in herself. And I want to fix her. Not just for me, but also for her. It kills me to see her hurting. My eyes trail over her, sitting there brave and strong in so many ways, yet vulnerable in others.

“What we’ve shared has meant a lot more than a couple of kisses, and you know it,” I whisper before I clear my throat. Her nod is barely noticeable. “I see something in you, Denver. I want you to believe in yourself like I believe in you. And trust is what it boils down to—you trust no one, not even yourself, and I’m thinking not many people have given you a reason to do that. But I’m asking you to trust me so that I can show you how to trust yourself. Our ‘arrangement’ will make you stronger. And I want it to be just you and me.”

Her eyes bulge. “You think I’m weak?”

Is that the only thread she finds offensive? “Hell, no. The exact opposite actually, or I wouldn’t call you ‘little fighter.’ You have weaknesses, yes, but you’re also one of the strongest people I’ve ever met.” She quirks a brow at me, like I’m full of shit. “Remember your philosophy on winning over unworthy opponents?” She nods slowly, and I can see her gears turning. “Where’s the fun in dominating a weak partner?” I’m so hard I could pound nails right now. I had no idea we’d end up talking this openly, but it’s such a fucking turn on.

“So you want to break me because I would be a challenge.”

I laugh lightly because … well, yes and no. “I don’t want to break you exactly. It’s more than that. Yes, I’ll be in control, but only so far as you’ll let me. So, you’ll be able to let go, knowing you’re safe and protected, but you won’t be blocking me out.” I shrug. “Ultimately, you’ll have all the control. And you’ll learn to exercise control in your own life, even within your risks. It’s all about striking a balance.”

I wait to let her digest the simplest version of what I’m proposing. She licks her lips again. She seems to relax a little and pulls her legs under her on the couch, draping an arm along the back. “I don’t think I’m submissive, Ransom. I don’t think I have a submissive bone in my body actually.”

Mirroring her position, my fingertips graze hers. “Here’s what I see. I see a young woman who has the weight of the world on her shoulders, with control of things she should’ve never had control over at such a young age. A woman who is clever, competitive, beautiful, talented … a woman who’s lost control over her personal life and is about to piss away all the good she’s got going for her,” I hesitate before bringing up her “addiction,” as she calls it. “You tell me you’ve been seeking to numb your pain with sex, and that’s no way to live. It’s killing you inside, Denver. I see that deadness working its way out, destroying all that good in its path. That’s what I see.

“I also see a man who’s been looking for a woman like you. I see a man who’s already fallen for you in every conceivable way, who wants to give you what you need most in this world. Something you don’t even realize you need …”

She swallows hard again. Her chest rises and falls with quick breaths. Her eyes glow with understanding and intrigue. I know she hears the truth in my words. Will she admit it aloud?

“What do I need, Ransom?” she asks finally.

Anticipation gets the better of me, and my grin’s as naughty as they come. “An awakening.”

_____________________

 

Dear Reader,

 

I hope you enjoyed this wild, sometimes heart-wrenching, ride and you continue the journey with these characters and me.

What began as a standalone, in my head, morphed into more of a saga as I got to know these characters. As I began to explore what drove Greer, the more I realized how fascinating his and Denver’s past was, and I had to show it to you rather than merely reference it. Once that unfolded, there was no way I could do Greer, Denver, and Ransom’s complicated, intense future justice in the same book.

What does Greer have to say for himself? Is it over between them? Denver’s forgiven him, but can we? How will Denver overcome her self-hatred and self-destructive compulsions? Will Denver say yes to Ransom? How on earth did this bull-riding badass become a “Baby Dom”? All these questions and more shall be in answered in
Freed
, coming April 2014. See, not a long wait at all.

Hearing from my readers, makes my day. And I have been known to gush over them from time to time. Message me at
Lynetta Halat on Facebook
or email at
[email protected]
Wanna make me ridiculously happy? Pretty please, leave an honest, respectful review. Watch me get real fired up when you sign up for
the mailing list
. I promise not to SPAM you, only new release information, free scenes, and interesting stuff like that.

Thank you for reading!

 

Love,

Lynetta

 

A Note from the Author

 

The date rape that occurs within this novel is obviously fictional, but date rape, as it is portrayed here, is not and happens much more than we realize. The research that Denver reads about are facts and statistics that I discovered about this topic while gathering information for my book. The way in which Denver is choosing to deal with this—silence and working it out on her own—may not be the most responsible way or the best course of action. Please see
RAINN
for help, support, and the facts.

 

About the Author

Since the dawn of time, Lynetta Halat has lived to read and has written innumerable stories and plays. A lover of good books, bad boys, and kickass heroines, she'd always dreamt of penning books that people could connect with and remember. She also has a secret penchant for wringing the emotions out of unsuspecting readers, and she collects reader's tears in much the same way that wine connoisseurs collect their favorite vintage.

Her first novel,
Every Rose
, was the perfect catalyst to launch her into the world of publishing, effectively burrowing her way into the hearts and minds of readers throughout the world.
Everything I've Never Had
was her follow-up adult romance novel. Now, she has penned 
Used
, a New Adult Romance that she hopes sinks its teeth into you and doesn't let go.

Her love of the English language prompted her to pursue a Master's degree in English from Old Dominion University in Virginia, where she also minored in snark and interpretive dance. She lives somewhere along the Mississippi Gulf Coast with her adorable husband, two amazing sons, and two loveable dogs. When she's not writing riveting stories, she likes to focus on her macramé art and her scouring of eBay, where she buys locks of hair from her favorite rock stars, most especially Bret Michaels and Dave Grohl.

 

For more information about Lynetta and her books, visit:

 

Facebook

 

Website

 

Goodreads

 

Twitter

 

Amazon Author Page

 

Acknowledgements

 

To my family and my friends—thank you so very much for all of your love and support. Your support keeps me enthusiastic and your love keeps me writing.

 

To all the book bloggers who believed in this book—I can never repay for you loving and promoting my book, my baby, but please know you have my undying gratitude. Thank you for making it your own.

 

To my awesome beta readers—Bobbie, Elle, Debi, Stephanie, Kelly, and Ashley—thank you so much for the invaluable feedback and falling in love with my story and my characters. More than anything, thank you for pushing me to be better and helping me grow as a writer.

 

To my fabulous author friends who keep me semi-sane, grounded, and laughing my butt off, thank you!

 

Without you, my readers, my book would just be a thing and not the living, breathing organism that you make it when you love, connect, remember, and share it. Thank you.

 

Read on! Write on! Love on!

Table of Contents

Used Playlist

Prologue

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-one

Chapter Twenty-two

Chapter Twenty-three

Chapter Twenty-four

Chapter Twenty-five

Chapter Twenty-six

Chapter Twenty-seven

Chapter Twenty-eight

Chapter Twenty-nine

Chapter Thirty

Chapter Thirty-one

Chapter Thirty-two

Chapter Thirty-three

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