Use Somebody (13 page)

“Oh,” he said, and his green eyes went soft. “Did you tell her how you feel?”

“You mean about how it still counts as cheating if he breaks up with her just to sleep with a bunch of other women, then wants to get back together? Or how she took him back way too easily, and this sorry excuse for a man should be groveling on his knees, begging for forgiveness for his off-the-charts level of assholery? Or how I have no idea how someone so brilliant could also be such a fool? Or how she could allow herself to be treated that way, especially by the man who supposedly loves her?”

“Well?” he said. “Did you?”

“No. I chickened out. But I did tell her she deserved better.”

“It’s a start,” Vance said around a forkful of pancakes. “So is Gwen
your
best friend?”

“Um…” I hesitated. It felt weird to pause. Gwen and I had history, but as far back as I could remember, Lexi’s name had rolled off my tongue.
Lexi and Scarlett, best friends forever
. This time, the old phrase got stuck in my throat. I hadn’t seen or heard from her in months. It was just another thing in my life that had changed. I swallowed and answered honestly. “I don’t really have a best friend, I guess.”

“You guess?”

“I had one, but we’ve kind of… grown apart?”

He shrugged, still chewing. “It happens.”

For some reason, I felt like explaining. “You remember Lexi, my tall, blond friend from high school?” He nodded. “We had this clique of friends. A group of six, tight all through junior high and high school. Gwen was part of it. And Nathan too. But Lexi and I were kind of like you and Cole, inseparable since first grade, when my family moved in next door. We thought we’d be best friends forever.”

“So what happened?”

“I don’t know…” I said, nervously stirring the straw in my water glass.
Damn. What
didn’t
happen?
I tried to block out memories of
that night
… when everything in my life went to hell. It wasn’t the sole reason I left Lexi behind, it was just the final straw to a long buildup. “We’re so different. Living there, with her, became kind of poisonous to me. I just had to get away.”

“Well, good for you then.”

I looked up at him, surprised by his praise. “She doesn’t see it that way. Gwen thinks in her eyes, I abandoned our lifelong friendship.”

“She would prefer you fall deeper into the rabbit hole and rot with her? Great friend,” he scoffed, taking another bite of syrupy pancake.

I looked down at my own plate and began absently cutting my pancakes into pieces. “I don’t know… maybe I didn’t have to cut her off completely… but I tried to stay friends. I tried the whole time I was in college. She just kept trying to change me into someone I didn’t like. I constantly had to hold my tongue, because it was her way or nothing. It was like I was never good enough, just the way I was. Or at least, who I wanted to be. This probably doesn’t make any sense.” I huffed, putting down my fork with more force than necessary. I looked up at Vance, ready to end this rant, but found him staring intently back at me.

There was something about his eyes, deep green and open, that compelled me to keep talking. Suddenly I felt a powerful need for him to hear this. For
someone
to understand where I was coming from. I left behind everything and everyone I knew. I didn’t regret it and I liked being on my own, but in that moment I needed a little reassurance. Vance was an intelligent, reasonable person; he’d be honest with me if my decision had been ridiculous. And if he backed me up, well… maybe I would feel a little less alone.

I continued, meeting his gaze, “I just wanted to have someone who understands the real me, and likes me anyway. Is that so crazy?”

He stared at me for another long moment, before going back to his pancakes and clearing his throat to mutter, “No.”

I took another bite too, feeling a little embarrassed about unloading all that on him. I couldn’t recall the last time I revealed so much of my heart to someone, and he could barely even respond. Maybe I had misread the openness in his eyes. That whole dramatic speech had probably freaked him out. Trying to lighten the mood, I straightened and returned to the previous subject.

“I wasn’t always a loser, if that’s what you’re thinking,” I joked.

He raised an eyebrow at me. “I wasn’t thinking that. Don’t forget I remember you from high school. I knew your friends. All of them. Honestly, you’re better off.”

That’s right… he remembered me from his senior year of high school, when I was still blond and sheltered and naïve. I supposed the writing was on the wall that our clique wouldn’t really last forever, but I was too blind to see it. It was before my first heartbreak. Before I felt like I had to change who I was in order to be accepted. And before I learned the truth—that happily ever after didn’t really exist.

“Does it always have to be so complicated? Aren’t people ever just… genuine?” I asked aloud, probably freaking him out again.

He considered this, and swallowed before responding. “Maybe not in high school.”

I laughed to myself. He was right. What was I expecting? Regardless of how it felt at the time, it wasn’t like I had it all figured out back then, either. I shook my head and tried to brush it off, despite the desolation of my doubts. “Is it ever even worth it?”

“Oh it’s worth it,” Vance pointed his sticky fork at me in rebuttal. “With the right people, it’s definitely worth it.”

A veiled smile hid my true feelings on the matter. He sounded so certain, but I was just as fixed in my own beliefs. Instead of arguing further, I did what I do best. I made light.

“Then I’m completely hopeless. Apparently I’m a magnet that only attracts the
wrong
people.”

“Apparently.” He winked and I rolled my eyes. He looked down to his plate before continuing. “But who knows, Rosie? Things can change.”

The chime of the front door announced our first customers in over an hour.

Ugh.

Slow nights made me feel especially lazy. As time crawled by at a snail’s pace, every random task disrupted my very pleasant evening of sitting.

Vance got up first and I followed reluctantly. As he passed through to the front, the door swung open, but I stopped short and let it shut in front of my face. Stunned, I lifted on my toes to peek through the small window and confirmed my worst suspicion.

The customers were two boys and a girl. And I recognized them all. One of them was Miles.

What was
he
doing here?

When Vance casted a glance in my direction, I hid, leaning up against the wall so I could listen but wouldn’t be seen. I didn’t think Miles had spotted me yet, but I couldn’t be sure. The only thing I knew for certain is that I could not, under any circumstances, go out there. Vance would have to handle them on his own.

“Welcome to Mooshi Treatery, what can I get for you?” To a stranger’s ear Vance sounded almost totally normal, but in knowing him as well as I did, I could detect a slight hint of unease in his voice.

The other boy and girl made their ice cream selections first and Vance began to serve them. Normally, for three customers, we would work together to get this done faster. But he could handle three. He would have to. I could only hope against an influx of customers until they were gone.

Then, I heard his voice.

“Is Scarlett Rossi working tonight?” Miles asked, sending goosebumps down my arms—and not the good kind.

So it hadn’t been a coincidence. But how did he know where to find me? I hadn’t so much as maintained a Facebook page since our split. My stomach strained like a pulled rubber band, set to snap. I wondered if his friends knew the real reason for coming to Mooshi Treatery tonight was more than just dessert.

There was a pause, then Vance replied, “Nope. Would you like to try any samples?”

“When is she working next?”

Another pause. “I can’t give out my coworkers’ schedules. Privacy rights, you know. I can only help you with ice cream.”

“Listen—”

“I’m afraid if you’re not going to order something, I have to ask you to leave.”

Vance was a team lead and all, but this was an ice cream shop, not a bar. I’d never heard him raise his voice, much less speak in such a firm, authoritative manner to a customer. From behind the wall, my eyes popped in disbelief. He was protecting me. It had been a long time since anyone had protected me…

A few moments passed before I heard Miles scoff, “Whatever, man,” and the door chime announced their departure.

I sagged in relief, sliding all the way down the wall and landing on my butt.

When Vance came back, he smirked at me on the floor. “Got yourself an admirer?”

I wrapped my arms around my knees self-consciously, unable to look up. “Thanks, I owe you big time.”

“Anytime, Rosie,” he said, offering me a hand. “Everything okay?”

I stayed on the floor and rudely ignored his offer to help me up. All I could manage was a nod. A few seconds went by before his hand slowly retracted.

“Who was that guy? If he’s bothering you, I need to tell management.”

Not wanting to be cause a scene, I brushed it off. “It’s fine. Just an old ex that I don’t care to see.”

“You dated that guy?”

“Actually we—” I stopped. He didn’t need to know all the gritty details. “Yes, we dated my senior year.”

“So what does he want?”

I shrugged. I honestly had no clue.

I could feel Vance’s eyes on me, assessing. After a thoughtful pause, he responded, “You should feel safe here. I’ll tell management.”

I simply nodded again.

The night remained slow. We sat in silence for another half hour until the next customers arrived. I was thankful Vance wasn’t teasing me or pushing me for details on Miles. But I knew he was thinking about it, because he didn’t try to make any conversation at all.

As always, we worked separately during closing time, and I moved in haste to finish my tasks quickly as possible. Seeing Miles even for a split second had left me with a bad feeling. I just wanted to get out of there.

After our shifts were finally over, Vance locked the doors and walked with me across the back parking lot to my car. I knew that he was worrying about me, and I hated it. But if I insisted I was fine, it would only be a lie.

Finding out that Miles was looking for me threw me for a loop. I hadn’t seen him since the night of our dramatic breakup a whole year ago. What could he possibly want from me now? And if he had something to say, why not just call? Showing up at my work was just… unnerving. Did he always have to go for shock value?

We stood quietly in front of my car for a moment, neither of us knowing what to say. The little furrow in his brow gave away his concern, and the weak smile I offered for assurance was hardly effective.

“Scarlett?” My name echoed across the empty lot. Not from Vance’s mouth.

I froze as the familiar voice crashed into me like a wave, saturating my ears with blood and my lungs with lead.

He was still here… waiting for me.

Miles. The second boy I ever loved. The one who swooped in to pick up the pieces that Nathan had left behind. The boy I dated throughout my entire senior year, escorting me to Homecoming, Prom, and graduation. The boy who gave me a ring and promised we’d be together forever.

That
Miles.

He stepped out of the shadows, and the man from my memories stood before me. Same short blond hair and athletic frame that I remembered. He was wearing his team jacket, hands casually stuffed in its pockets, eyeing me from head to toe like I wasn’t quite what he expected.

In hindsight, it seemed stupid to believe he had given up so easily tonight. If he came looking for me after all this time, no doubt there was something he wanted. Whatever it was, my skin was already crawling.

Vance turned and stood in front of me protectively. If I weren’t so nervous I would have laughed at the irony, remembering when Miles was my protector. Now he was the adversary.

“What’s this?” Miles chuckled, sizing up Vance’s stance. “I’m not gonna hurt her, douchebag!”

“Just leave her alone,” Vance said patiently. “She doesn’t want to talk to you.”

Ignoring him, Miles leaned to see me over Vance’s shoulder and smiled. “Nice hair, by the way. Though I have to admit, I liked you better as a blond.”

“What do you want, Miles?” I snapped. “And what part of ‘stay the heck away from me’ did you not understand?”

“Nice. Feel better now that that’s outta your system?” he laughed, facetious. “Just wanted to say hello. See how you were.”

“I’m fine. Don’t I look fine?” I asked wryly. With the black hair and scowl, it was obvious I was far from the bright-eyed, innocent girl he had once dated, and it was obvious I was far from fine.

Miles smirked, amused at my sarcasm. “You can’t fool me. We used to be close, not too long ago.”

“That was a lifetime ago. I’m not the same girl you knew.”

“Clearly. I guess she went away with those goldilocks.”

I fidgeted, and Vance cut in. “I think your time’s up, buddy.”

Miles shot him a warning glare.

Standing straighter, I jutted my chin out and tried to sound firm. “Well, this has been lovely, but if you don’t mind…”

“I heard you’ve had a rough year,” Miles cut me off, “and I wanted to know how you were holding up.”

I tensed, finally sensing the real reason for his visit. Since our colleges had been near each other, it was possible he heard through the grapevine about the situation that led to me dropping out. But I couldn’t go there now. Not with him. Not in front of Vance.

“What a nice gesture. Forgive me if I call bullshit.”

His eyes narrowed, clearly upset that his charms were not working.
Not this time
. “Is it so hard to believe I care about you? Good grief, Scarlett, you were nearly my wife!”

Vance stiffened, and my jaw dropped in indignation, shocked that he would go there right now.

“Well, you did us both a favor by sleeping with your assistant coach, so we wouldn’t have to make that mistake. And yes, in fact, that does make it hard to believe you ever cared!”

Miles didn’t get angry at my outburst. Instead he looked… smug. He was playing me, getting me riled up on purpose. “Well, well. You’re feistier than I remember. I musta done something right if you’re still this affected by me.”

He was so infuriating!
“Oh please,” I said, heavy with sarcasm. “I resent your stupidity! We had fun playing house, Miles, but what part of being a cheater and a pompous jackass did you think I’d miss?”

That did it. His lips pressed into a hard line. We had never seen these cruel sides of one another before. There had never been fighting or bitter words between us. Our relationship was pleasant until the very last night, then it was over.

“You used to be so…” he drifted off and shook his head. “What happened to you.” The question was rhetorical, his undertones laced with condemnation.

Well I didn’t ask for his approval. Nor did I believe for one second that he cared. But showing up to rub my failures in my face was a new low, even for him. So I hit him where it hurt: his ego.

I glared at him pointedly, answering his rhetorical question. “Assholes. Just… like… you. That’s what happened to me.”

Fists clenched and unclenched at his sides. “You never even gave us a chance.”

“Seriously
Miles? What the hell are you even talking about?”

“I made a mistake! That doesn’t mean our whole relationship was a lie! At least it wasn’t to me.”

“Yeah, well, I wasn’t stupid enough to stick around and find out. If you’re looking for a sucker, go on back to your mistress.”

He grunted in frustration. We were getting nowhere. “I came here to say something, damn it!”

“Obviously. Stalking me at work sorta tipped me off!”

“Will you stop talking for five seconds!”

“Fine! Spit it out!”

“I’m trying to say I’m sorry!”

The parking lot stilled, his words echoing off the empty pavement between us. I didn’t know what to expect, but it certainly hadn’t been
that.
What was he apologizing for exactly? Our relationship? How it ended? Everything that happened since?

I never needed an apology from Miles. As soon as I found out he cheated, I wrote him off and cursed myself for my own naiveté. It took me a whole year of dating until I saw the real him: arrogant, self-indulgent. A wolf with a sparkling smile and a silver tongue, preying on my vulnerability. And now that was all I could see. After we split, I never missed him, never wanted an explanation, never wanted to make amends. And tonight, I sure as hell didn’t want his pity.

“Alright then. You said it.” And with that I turned and climbed in my car.

Vance knocked lightly on the window, catching my attention. Geez, I had forgotten he was even here. “Pancakes?” he said, the sound muffled through the glass. I nodded once, pulled into reverse, and got the hell out of there.

* * *

When I arrived at Honey’s, I held up two fingers to order the usual—two pancake plates and two hot chocolates—and waited for Vance in our regular booth while frequently glancing out the window.

Admittedly, the whole scene I just fled was a bit worrisome. Miles was no hothead, unless you counted his pride. But he was a smooth talker with plenty of motivation to ruin me, fully equipped and capable of telling a few choice stories that could change Vance’s opinion about me, thus our friendship. Based on tonight, I didn’t know exactly how much information Miles had on me, or what he planned to do with it. Vance was a smart guy, but I wouldn’t put it past him if one day he reached his tolerance limit for my drama.

I exhaled with relief when Vance walked in. His eyes found me immediately and he headed in my direction with a smile that was neither judgmental nor wary.

Soon as he got to the table, I jumped up and wrapped my arms around him in a tight hug. It happened automatically, obviously, because had I thought about it beforehand, I definitely wouldn’t have done it. Initially he froze in surprise, then relaxed and lightly held me to him. It felt strange and awkward, but my gratefulness for his friendship outweighed either of those things in that moment.

When we broke apart his eyes were round with shock. “What was that for?”

“For playing my ex-buffer. That might not have gone so well if you hadn’t been there.” I slid into the booth and fiddled with my fingernails, rethinking my impulsiveness. “Don’t get used to it.”

A wide grin broke out across his face. “Any others I need to worry about?”

I swallowed back my emotion. “Nope. I should be good now.”