Until Trevor (19 page)

“No
, you can’t have Nico drop you off at home,” Nico says, laughing.

“Fine
.” I walk back to the table, grabbing my purse. “I guess we’re leaving,” I tell November, who looks at my face, then at Trevor, and starts laughing.

“That’s fine
. We need to leave as well,” November says, getting off her barstool. “But we will see you this weekend for the party, right?” she asks, looking at me, and I have no idea what she’s talking about.

“What party?” I ask
, then look around when I notice that everyone has gotten quiet.

“Oh
, it’s not a party; it’s a—um—Bar-B-Que,” Asher says, cutting in.

“
We’ll be there,” Trevor says, glaring at everyone before pulling me out the door behind him.

“I didn’t know we were going to a Bar
-B-Que this weekend,” I tell him, as he lifts me up into the truck and buckles me in.

“It slipped my mind
,” he tells me, kissing my forehead.

“Oh
,” I say, laying my head on his shoulder, relaxing into his side once he starts the truck. The tequila is making me feel all warm and fuzzy. I’m such a lightweight.

“Why is it
that every time someone talks about kids, you panic?”

I sit up
; I knew this day was coming. “I told you before, I don’t want kids.”

“I want kids
, Liz, and I know that you do too. I see the longing in your face anytime you hold July, or even when you met Kara and noticed she was pregnant.”

I do want them
; deep down there is nothing I want more then to be a mother. But I can’t do it; I can’t have children, and then leave them behind. “I told you before, Trevor, that if that was a deal breaker for you, then you should get out before feelings were involved.”

“Tell me that you never want kids.”

‘I…” I can’t say it; the words just won’t come out.

“We are going to make beautiful babies
, and you are going to be an awesome mom,” he says, kissing the top of my head. My stomach is in knots, my palms sweating. I want to tell him so badly that I don’t want kids, but I can’t. When I think about having a little boy, with big brown eyes and long dark lashes, who looks just like Trevor, I can’t tell him that I don’t want that. I lay my head back on his shoulder, clearing my mind of everything except the alcohol coursing through my system. When we finally pull up to the house, I go straight to the bathroom, change into pajamas, and get into bed. When I’m almost asleep, Trevor gets into bed, tucking me under him like he always does. I feel him kiss the top of my head, and hear him tell me he loves me, right before I fall asleep.

*~*~*

“Tell me again why I have to wear a blindfold?” I ask Trevor, who is carrying me somewhere. I had gotten up this morning, alone in the house. At first, I thought he was mad about last night and decided to cut his losses, but then I wandered into the kitchen and there was a pot of coffee waiting for me, along with a note telling me that he had gone for a run. I was on my second cup of coffee when he came into the house, his white t-shirt plastered to his body with sweat. He was pulling it off as he walked into the kitchen, without realizing that I was there, unaware that he was putting on a show.

I watched as
he wiped his head, face, and then his chest without looking up. His baggy sweats hung so low on his hips that if you pulled down slightly, you would get the full experience of Trevor Mayson. When he lifted his head and his eyes caught mine, he smirked. Walking towards me, he kissed my forehead, and went to the laundry room, where I could hear him banging around, most likely destroying some innocent piece of clothing. The other day, he called and asked me if he could wash towels with other laundry. I told him yes, thinking he would know to still separate the dark and lights. Oh, was I wrong. He washed a red towel with the white laundry, turning all the white t-shirts he wears to work a nice light pink.

“Morning
,” he said, walking back into the kitchen.

“Mor
ning,” I replied, looking at his abs as he moved around, pulling things from the cupboards. I had no idea what kind of work went into looking like he does, but seriously, I loved looking at him.

“Stop looking at me like that
, you little pervert,” he said, laughing and making my face heat.

“Stop walking around half
naked,” I mumbled into my coffee cup, still looking over the rim at his body.

“
Nah,” he said, shaking his head. “I like that look.” He kissed my head. “We need to leave in about an hour; be ready to go,” he told me, leaning against the counter to eat a bowl of cereal.

I glare
d at him, but agreed with an “okay.” I grabbed a banana off the counter. Peeling it, I slid it into my mouth, looking at him, watching his eyes darken, and then I took a big bite, and made sure that my teeth made a loud chomping sound.

“Ouch
!” he laughed, covering himself with his hand. I smirked at him over my shoulder, walking out of the kitchen.

“Yes
, you need the blindfold,” he tells me, bringing me back to the present. He’s holding me closer. I know we’re outside; I can smell flowers and feel the sun beating down on me. “I’m going to stand you up now,” he says, lowering me to the ground. I hold onto his shoulders, and as my feet touch the ground, my stomach fills with butterflies, and my pulse kicks up. “This is our first stop,” he tells me, taking off my blindfold. I look around seeing that we’re in the cemetery where my father is buried. My stomach drops when I look down at my dad’s grave.

“Why are we here?” I ask
, looking at Trevor, who is now looking nervous.

“I wanted to meet him. You don’t talk to me about him very often
, and I know that he was important to you.”

I nod in agreement
. “He was my best friend,” I tell him, looking at my dad’s headstone. “No matter what happened, I knew that I could talk to him about anything, and he would listen. Or if I had a problem, he would help me find a solution.”

“He sounds like
he was a good man,” he says, wrapping his arms around me.

“
He was the best; he would have liked you,” I reply, and tears start falling from my eyes.

“I would have liked him to
o.” He holds my face in his hands, kissing each eye. “He’s one of the reasons why you are so beautiful on the inside, along with the outside. He’s one of the reasons I couldn’t help but fall in love with you.”

I sob
, my head crashing into his chest; he holds me for a long time, just standing outside with the breeze blowing, and the sun beating down on us. When I finally calm down, he asks me to go wait in the truck, and says that he would be with me in a few minutes. I kneel down on the ground in front of my dad’s headstone and send him a silent message telling him that I am happy, and that I love and miss him. Then I stand up, kiss Trevor, and walk back to the truck to wait for him.

I watch him from the passenger seat as he too kneels down in front of Dad’s headstone. I can see his lips moving, but can’t make out the words. But then, he reaches out, pats the top of the headstone, stands up
, and makes his way to the driver’s side of the truck.

Once back in the truck
, he takes the blindfold out of his pocket, wrapping it back over my eyes. “One more stop,” he says. I feel the truck reverse, and we drive for a good while. When he parks the truck, he drags me out on his side, carrying me again, but this time, just a short ways. When he stops walking, he sets me on the ground, leads me by my hand, and helps me sit; I can tell it’s a swing I’m sitting on. When he removes the blindfold, he’s kneeling in front of me. I look around to see where we are.

“Why are we here?”
I tilt my head back, looking up at the tree I was sitting under. The swing is one I used to swing on all the time when I was young. The old rope ties up high in the branches of the old giant weeping willow; the outer branches of the tree creates its own private escape for whoever was swinging.

“I talked to you
r mom, and she told me that the two of them would spend time here when they were dating. She also told me that this is where your dad asked her to marry him.” His eyes are warm when he’s talking about my parents.

“It is
; this was my dad’s favorite spot,” I tell him, remembering coming here when I was little. “I used to make my dad push me on this swing for hours. Sometimes he would bring a picnic; once, he even had a tea party here with me and dressed up.” I laugh, and so does Trevor.

When
he looks over my face, I see so much love in his eyes that my palms start to sweat and I hold my breath. “Your mom told me that this was a special place for you, a spot full of love and happiness. That’s why I wanted to bring you here.”

“Oh
,” I say, watching Trevor lean forward and pull something out of his pocket, before returning to his kneeling position.

“
You are my best friend. I can laugh with you—and fight with you—but I always know that I will be with you. You are the person I want to start a family with, grow old with, make memories with, dream with, cry with, and live this life with. Will you marry me?” He holds the ring out to me between two fingers. I cover my mouth, looking down at the beautiful ring with an emerald-cut stone my eyes shoot up to his. “This is the part where you say, ‘I can’t imagine living my life without you’…and say yes.” He actually looks nervous.

“Yes
,” I struggle to get out with my mouth still covered. He takes the hand that’s covering my mouth, brings it to his, and kisses my fingers, before sliding the ring on.

“Perfect
,” he says, kissing my finger before pulling me down to him.

“This has to be the best proposal in the history of proposals
,” I tell him, laughing.

“I figured I fucked up the first one pretty badly
; I needed to make up for that.”

“The first proposal was you
,” I tell him, pulling my face away from his neck so I can look at him. “You’re very bossy and demanding; that’s one of the reasons I love you.”

“Y
ou’re stuck with me for life.”

“I know
; maybe I’m crazy, but that makes me very happy.” I laugh when he starts tickling me.

“Let
’s go home crazy girl.”

“Let
’s go home and celebrate,” I clarify.

“Oh
, we’re definitely going to celebrate.” He picks me up, tosses me over his shoulder, and walks us back up to the truck.

On the ride home, I ask him what he was saying when he was alone for those few minutes at my dad’s grave. He tells me that he was asking Dad’s permission to ask me to marry him. I didn’t think I could fall any more in love with Trevor, but apparently, I was very wrong. My heart swells
with love for my fiancé—wow…my
fiancé
—and when we got home, we celebrated all night long.

Chapter
9

Trevor

The night after the “bar-b-que”—, which was really a surprise engagement party—I flip on the bedside lamp when I hear the phone ring. “Yeah?” I answer, when I see Cash’s number on the display.

“Meet me at the barn in
twenty,” he says, before he hangs up. I look down at the phone in my hand, wondering what the hell is going on. Since we were kids, if one of us has a problem, we meet at the old barn on my parents’ property. I look down at Liz, who is sleeping soundly beside me. Her face is tucked into the crook of my arm, her breathing even, and her hand with her engagement ring laying across my abs.

“Baby
,” I whisper, running my fingers down her smooth cheek.

“Go away
,” she mumbles, smacking at my hand. I chuckle, running my hand down her cheek again, making her swat at me, before rolling away from me. “Baby,” I say again, this time near her ear, making her groan and hide her head under the pillow. “I need to leave; I’ll be back,” I say. Her head comes out from under the pillow, and she looks at the clock, then me.

“
It’s three in the morning.” Her voice is soft, her eyes sleepy and concerned.

“Cash called
, and he needs me.”

“Is he okay?” She sits up, her white tank top hiding nothing. “Should I come with you?” she asks
, pulling her hair out of her face, looking around the room, adorably confused.

“No
. Go back to sleep.”

“Are you sure?” she ask
s, as I tuck her back into bed.

“
I’m sure,” I say, kissing her before I pull on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. I walk back over to my side of the bed, where Liz has cuddled down into the blankets, and kiss her forehead, telling her I love her.

“Lolly
,” I call into the living room. Lolly comes down the hallway wagging her tail, thinking that it’s time for breakfast. “Come lay down.” I point to the floor near the door, knowing that if I’m gone, she will stay and look after my girl. I walk into the living room, grab my boots and pulling them on, grab my keys from the bowl Liz had placed near the door, lock up the house behind me, and head out to my truck.

  “What’s going on?” I ask as soon as I walk into the large old barn. The inside is separated into two levels. The top is an old hayloft, and the bottom is an empty space except for an old card table, with a few chairs gathered around it.

“Waiting
until Asher gets here, then I’ll explain,” Cash says, pacing back and forth, running his hands down the back of his neck.

“Do you know what’s going on?” I ask Nico
, who’s sitting in one of the chairs watching Cash pace.

“No clue.” He shrugs
, and I sit in the chair next to him, watching Cash, becoming more concerned by the second. When Asher walks in, Nico and I stand.

“What’s going on?” Asher asks
, looking at Cash. And for the first time in my life, I watch my normally-happy little brother break down. Cash’s head falls forward as we all gather around him. I put my hand on Cash’s shoulder, and when his eyes come up, he runs his hands down his face.

“I fucked up
,” Cash says, his voice broken.

“
Whatever it is, we will figure it out; tell us what’s going on.”

“Jules is pregnant. How the fuck am I going to fix that?”
he asks, his eyes pleading.

“Jesus
,” I mumble, running my hands down my face, before looking at all three of my brothers.

“I thought you were with Lilly?” Nico ask
s. I’m sure we’re all wondering. Cash has been all about Lilly since he met her and we got back from Alabama; if he has the weekend off, he spends it with her near her school. He was even thinking about asking her to transfer schools so that she could be closer.

“I broke it off with her
,” he says, looking away.

“Dude
, are you sure that she’s even pregnant? Or even if she is, you sure that it’s your kid?” Nico asks for all of us again.

“I went to the doctor with her today
, and the doctor confirmed that around the time I slept with her is when she had gotten pregnant.”

“What the fuck?” Nico looks at me
, and I know exactly what he’s thinking.

“Did you use protection?” I ask.

“Yeah! I'm not stupid.” He groans. “We had been hooking up for a while but we both agreed that’s all it was ever going to be.”

“Did you have
the condom, or did she?”

“Does it fucking matter whose condom we used?”

“I fucking told you that Jules was telling people at the bonfire that she wanted to get knocked up. Do you remember that conversation, dumbass?”

“I slept with her before you told me that shit
!” he roars, throwing the card table across the room. “I haven’t slept with anyone else since I met Lilly.”

“Shit
,” I whisper.

“Calm down,” Asher says
, taking a step toward him. “You know that no matter what, we will be here for you, whatever you need.”

“I just broke up with my girl.” Cash looks at me
, pleading. “I didn’t want her to have to go through this with me, so I called her and broke it off with her over the phone. I didn’t even have the balls to break it off with her in person.”

“You didn’t have to do that
,” Asher says.

“Jules is pregnant with my child.
After I saw my son and heard his heartbeat today, I knew what I had to do. I can’t be so selfish as to think that Lilly would want to stick with me through this, knowing that I’m having a child with another woman.” I didn’t like that he was going through this, but I understood why he would feel conflicted about having Lilly in this situation.

“Look I understand what you’re going through
,” Asher says, rubbing the back of his head. “You’re a good man, Cash. And out of all of us, you wear your heart on your sleeve; you always have. We need to make sure that this is your kid.”

“I know he’s mine
; I feel it in my gut.”

“Okay
, so what do you need from us?” Nico asks.

“I’m going to tell mom and dad in the morning
. I need you guys to be there. Jules has been living with her aunt, and I’m going to have her move in with me so that if she needs anything, I’m close by.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” Asher looks at me for back up.

“You asked me what I need, and I need your support. I need to know that you got my back.”

“We got your back
,” we all say in unison. “No matter what happens, you have us,” I tell him. Asher and Nico nod in agreement.

“How
‘bout I get the six-pack I have in my truck, and we all have a beer. Dad will be up in an hour to go down to the station; we can just head over there this morning,” Nico says.

“Sounds good to me
,” I agree, looking at Asher.

”
Works for me. I fed July before I left the house; my girls should be sleeping for a while.”

“I need a couple beers
,” Cash says, sitting down in one of the chairs, his elbows to his knees, and his head hung low. I watch Asher and Nico head outside before I walk to where Cash is.

“It will be alright
,” I tell him, sitting in a chair next to him.

“Lilly’s my one
,” he whispers so low that I barely hear him. His hands cover his face, and then come to rest over his mouth when our eyes connect.

“Fuck,” I say
, leaning my head back. I can’t imagine having to give up Liz.

“Yeah
,” he agrees, before looking at the door and watching Asher walk in with Nico close behind.

   
It is after ten in the morning when I walk into my house. The house is quiet, so I walk back to the bedroom and can hear the shower in the master bath going. When I open the bathroom door, Liz screams as I step into the steam-filled room, pulling my shirt off over my head.

“
Trevor?” she asks, wiping some of the fog from the shower door, and holding her chest.

“I
t’s me, babe,” I confirm, pulling off my boots and jeans.

“I’m just getting ou
t; do you want me to leave the water on for you?” Liz asks, as I look at her through the fog-covered glass doors of the shower.

“You step out of that shower
, baby, and I’m going to get you dirty. So I suggest you just stay there.” After the night and morning I had, feeling Cash’s pain over losing the girl that he was falling in love with, I need Liz more than I need my next breath. I need to know that she is here with me, and that she is mine.

She doesn’t say anything
, just watches me get undressed. When I open the shower door, she takes a step back, making room for me. I pull her into my arms, and rest my head on top of hers. Her arms wrap tighter around my middle as her body relaxes into mine.

“Are you okay?”
she asks, leaning her head back to look at me.

“Yeah.” Her eyes roam my face
.

“Is
Cash okay?”

I let out a deep breath before answering
, “He will be.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” she asks
, but I don’t want to talk right now.

“No, I want you on your knees.” She looks startled
, but then she licks her lips, sinking to her knees in front of me. I’m surprised by this move on her part; she must know that I need this, desperate to know that she’s mine in every way. My hands go to her hair, holding it away from her face. Running her hands up my thighs, she wraps her small hand around my cock. Her tongue comes out, licking over the head as her hand slides up and down the length. “No teasing; open up.” I tell her, and she takes me all the way in, looking up at me; her eyes are dark with lust, her plump lips stretching around my girth. Her rhythm is perfect; my cock touches the back of her throat every time she takes me all the way in. “You have a hot little mouth, baby,” I tell her, throwing my head back and enjoying the feel of her mouth wrapped around me.

H
er rhythm picks up, and her mouth and hand move faster. When I look back down at her, her other hand has disappeared between her legs. “Does having my dick in your mouth turn you on?” She moans as I run my hand down her cheek. “Stop touching yourself.” She hesitates and whimpers, before putting her hand on my thigh. I hold her face, watching myself disappear between her lips a few more times before I start to feel that tingle in my spine. “Stop.” I lift her under her arms, standing her up and turning her around. Then I place her hands on the shower wall. My fingers slide over her clit. “You’re soaked; you love sucking me off, don’t you, baby?”

“Yes
,” she moans, pressing back and trying to get more contact. I lean forward, sinking my teeth into her shoulder at the same time I slam into her. One arm goes around her waist, my free hand goes between her legs, and I play with her clit.

“Shit
, Trevor!” she yells, her hand reaches behind her, going around to grab onto the muscle of my ass to pull me deeper into her. She leans her head to the side, her mouth seeking mine, and our tongues touch. I’m lost in her.

“You’re never leaving me
.” I slam into her, punctuating my words. “You’re never getting rid of me. Tell me you want to have my child.”

“Yes!”
she screams, convulsing around me. Her pussy pulls me in, bringing on my own orgasm. I lay my forehead against her back, trying to catch my breath. I know that it’s fucked up to ask her to have my baby when I know she’s getting ready to have an orgasm; but fuck, I need her tied to me. “Oh my God! What was that?” she laughs.

“A moment that will be burned into my
brain for the rest of my life.” I lift my head from her back. Her forehead is resting against her arm on the tile wall. I slide out of her slowly; I hate losing the heat of her. I turn her around, kissing her before burying my face in her neck, absorbing her smell.

“Are you okay?”
she asks softly, hugging me a little tighter.

“Yeah, let’s get washed up. I’ll tell you what’s going on while you have some coffee.”

“Alright, but give me a second; my legs are still kind of wobbly.”

I smile
, making her eyes narrow. “Come here. I’ll wash you up.” I spend quite a bit of time washing her, and then eating her out, before I shut off the water and step out of the shower. I hold out a towel for her to wrap up in before I pull one down for me to dry off. Once we’re dressed and in the kitchen, I tell her about Cash and Jules. The more I talk, the more pissed off she becomes.

“So that girl from the bonfire wasn’t joking
. She seriously wanted to get knocked up by one of you guys?”

I shrug
. “I don’t know what the hell happened. All I know is that Cash slept with her.”

“And he knows it’s his?”