Untamed Fire (13 page)

He stopped himself, but Gaby could see that
he had loved his son deeply, and her heart ached for him.

“Anna wished to go to a neighboring ranch to
visit one day. I had much work to do and refused to go. Needing my
men here, I sent only two vaqueros to accompany her and Ramon.
Later that day one of my men spotted the thick gray smoke in the
distance.

“I took fifty men with me. We rode hard . .
. I was too late. Renegades had attacked the ranch. They are men
with no morals, no respect for life. They killed most of the people
at the ranch and put a torch to the buildings. I sorted through the
dead and wounded, praying Anna and Ramon had somehow miraculously
survived. Two of the women had, one had hid, the other... her
attack had been brutal, but she lived.”

He paused a moment and stared straight at
Gaby. “I found Anna. She was on the ground behind the smoldering
house. She lay naked, face down and curled almost in a ball. Her
attack had been vicious, and when they were through they had shot
her. One of my vaqueros covered her with a blanket. I went in
search of Ramon. I couldn’t find him. I feared the renegades had
taken him to trade to the Indians or sell. He was only a year old.
He would have been a good trade. While my vaqueros continued the
search I returned to my wife’s side. I was angry with myself for
not being there to protect them and angry with her for going. I
pulled the blanket back and moved her dark hair away from her
face—that’s when I saw his tiny finger. She had tried with her last
breath to save our son by covering him with her dying body. But the
bullet had ripped through her into him. She had attempted to do
what I should have done. I should have been there for them even if
I had died trying to save them.”

Rafael moved forward to the edge of the
chair. “You don’t know what it feels like to be powerless to save
those you love. You want so much to go back and erase the past and
start over. But I learned a long time ago that isn’t possible. At
twelve I was betrothed and swore I would protect my future wife
always. I would let no harm come to her. But I wasn’t able to keep
my promise, she was taken from me. I learned my lessons the hard
way. Now I rule the hacienda with an iron hand. I will not fail
those around me again.”

Gaby scooted forward, kneeling before him.
She took his hands in hers. “You didn’t fail anyone. You did what
you had to do, just as Anna did. Just as we all do. We are all
responsible for our own actions. Anna chose to go visiting that
day, and she chose to use her body as a shield to protect your
son.”

She wanted to add, ‘just as I had chosen to
take your horse that day fearing my brother had been injured,’ but
now was not the time. Perhaps one day he would understand, as she
now understood, his propensity to protect.

“Your words offer too simple of a solution.
Their deaths are my fault and will remain so.”

Tears misted Gaby’s eyes. He would never
forgive himself. Time would be his healer or his enemy.

Rafael slipped his hands away from hers and
reached up to run his finger along her cheek. It was silky soft and
warm. He ached to bring his lips to hers, to taste the excitement
for life that flowed through her. She offered solace from the
pain... a pain that had haunted him for the last eight years. He
could lose himself in her, or perhaps find himself and reaffirm his
own driving thirst for life.

She turned her face into the palm of his
hand and rubbed her cheek against its roughness. Her eyes were
almost closed, her lips partially open. He only needed to lean down
and run his tongue along her plump bottom lip and then... they both
would be lost.

Rafael pulled his hand away and Gaby’s eyes
sprung open. Their darkness shined from their recent tears, and he
could almost see himself mirrored in them, as though she had
captured him forever.

“Don’t touch my things again!” he snapped.
“And stay out of my study.”

She stood, hands on hips, looking down at
him. “You ordered me to clean your study.”

“An obvious mistake,” he reiterated
standing.

She grinned, realizing he had once again
erected his defense shield, something she was determined to see
permanently removed. “Then I’m forbidden to touch anything in here
again?”

“Correct.”

Gaby lifted her brown skirt so she could
watch where she stepped and avoid the scattered books and
papers.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“To join Lupe for her late-night snack.”

“Not until you’ve finished cleaning this
mess.”

Her grin widened even more and lit her
entire face with humor. “But you’ve forbidden me to touch
anything.”

Rafael couldn’t help but smile at how easily
he had fallen into her trap. “Not only is your tongue sharp, but so
is you wit.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” she
laughed.

He enjoyed their verbal sparring. She was a
worthy opponent, an unusual trait for a woman, but one he realized
he liked... liked very much. “Take it as you wish, but clean this
mess.”

Gaby was pleased to see the slight grin that
edged his lips. It was almost as though he battled with the smile
that fought to free itself. She walked toward him. “You must make
up your mind.”

Rafael took one step forward and stood a
breath away from her. His partially open white shirt grazed her
nipples, sending a shiver through her and raising the warm flesh
along her arms. She was aware that he purposely remained silent,
waiting for her to lift her head and look at him. She was afraid,
afraid of what she’d see in his eyes and what he’d see in hers. She
lifted her head.

Blue heat—the hot and searing kind—the kind
that makes one sweat, pant, ache. That was the color that radiated
from Rafael’s eyes when he looked at her.

“I have made up my mind.”

He left then, not waiting for her response,
not repeating his demand that she clean the room. Gaby stood still,
her head bent, her fingers clenching her skirt. He would have her.
One way or the other, he would have her.

~~~

Rafael stared out into the dark night. He
stood next to the low adobe wall, one foot resting upon it while
his arm lay across his bent knee. He listened to the familiar
chorus of the night. The crickets with their sharp, never-ending
cry; the owls with their soft, cooing hoot; the distant, lonely
howl of the coyote—he focused on all of them, fighting to keep
Gaby’s image from his mind.

It didn’t work. She floated persistently
before him. Tears stained her cheeks, passion filled her eyes, and
her smile tore at his heart.

No one had ever dared speak to him about
Anna and Ramon. He had buried the tragedy deep within himself the
day he had laid them both to rest. It was over and done... until
tonight. She had forced him to confront the past, open it, and
relive it. She had thought to explain away his guilt with mere
words, but it wasn’t that easy. His pain was too great, his fault
too obvious and his sorrow too deep.

He shut his eyes and stiffened against the
vision that assaulted him. He held his tiny son, wrapped in a small
white blanket, in his arms. A man motioned to him and he stepped
forward. He kissed his son’s covered forehead and placed his body
in the pine box. The lid slid across it and the first nail was
driven in.

Rafael’s eyes flew open, his chest heaved,
and a single tear stung his eye though he would not let it fall.
“Gaby, I need you.”

His body and mind warred. His mind warning
him against such foolish action, his body insisting he would find
peace within her warmth and innocence.

He remained where he stood, staring out into
the emptiness of the night.

“I’ll help anyway I can,” Eduardo Ortega
said agreeably, reaching for one of the thick cigars Rafael offered
him from an intricately carved box.

Rafael snapped the lid closed, not taking
one himself and returned it to the desk. “I appreciate your
support.”

“Padre Manuel’s murderer must be found,”
Eduardo emphasized before clipping the end off the cigar. “Have you
learned anymore of this man Padre Jose has told you about?”

Rafael leaned back in his chair behind the
desk. “Unfortunately, no, he seems to have vanished without anyone
having ever seen him arrive in town or leave.”

“Strange. The townspeople know all that goes
on in Los Angeles. It is odd that none but Padre Jose saw this
man.”

Rafael agreed with a nod. “There is much
that disturbs me about this incident.”

“What do you mean?”

Rafael sat forward and leaned his arms on
the desk. “I feel there is something that Padre Jose is hiding from
me, information that Padre Manuel passed on to him. Information
that was valuable enough to kill for.”

“Perhaps the padre never gave this
information to the murderer.”

Rafael shook his head. “No, he’d still be
alive. The padre told him. Unfortunately, I think the padre offered
more information than he should have.”

“Meaning?” Eduardo asked, moving forward in
his seat.

“Meaning the murderer didn’t want to take
the chance of anyone else discovering what the padre had told
him.”

Eduardo moved back in his seat and casually
puffed on his cigar. “This all seems preposterous. Perhaps it is as
simple as the murderer not liking the penance the padre gave him in
the confessional.”

Rafael’s features hardened and his voice
grew taut with annoyance. “The type of man Padre Jose described
does not go to confession. He cares little for life, has no morals,
and would kill without regret.”

“You describe a renegade.”

“Who else would have the audacity to kill a
priest?”

Eduardo remained silent for a moment and
when once again he looked up, Rafael was surprised to see fear in
the old man’s eyes. “Do you know what you’re saying, Rafael?”

Rafael gave a slight nod.

Eduardo shook his head and crushed the
remainder of the cigar in the glass dish. “You cannot actually
believe someone in Los Angles hired that man to kill the
padre?”

“No, not Los Angeles, someone from the
padre’s past, someone to whom he had entrusted a secret, someone
who now wants that secret silenced... forever.”

“This sounds like a puzzle that will be
difficult to solve.”

“A puzzle is solved when all the pieces are
identified and brought together to fit perfectly. It may take time,
but I’m sure all the pieces will eventually fall into place.”

Eduardo’s smile faltered as he stood.
“Again, whatever I can do to help, just ask.”

Rafael also stood and extended his hand. “I
never once doubted that I could depend on your support.”

The two men shook hands, Rafael wondering
why Eduardo’s grip was not as firm or confident as usual.

“Let us speak of more pleasant things,”
Eduardo offered.

Rafael stiffened. “A drink?” he asked,
knowing exactly what was on the older man’s mind.

Eduardo grinned, his cheeks puffing full.
“Does talk of my daughter upset you that much?”

Rafael leaned back against his desk, folding
his arms across his chest. “My mother’s continuous renewed health
brings with it the return of her motherly duties, one being that
she is responsible for finding me a wife. She never fails to remind
me of Louisa’s beauty, charm, and how uniting the two ranches would
make the Cabrillo holdings the largest in all of California.”

“You’re mother is correct, and I have but
one question for you.”

“Which is?” Rafael asked certain Eduardo was
about to ask what stopped him.

“Do you love Louisa?”

Rafael pulled himself away from the desk and
stood erect. Though the question was easy to answer, the question
shocked him. Why would Eduardo care if he loved his daughter?
Marriage was for furthering wealth and property, not love.

“Well, I’m waiting. Do you love my
daughter?’

Rafael had no intention of lying. “No, I
care for her as a friend, but I do not love her. But love will have
nothing to do with my decision to marry.”

“I think it will.” Eduardo’s tone was
serious. “You are an honest man, Rafael, but you are not honest
with your own feelings. I think you already care for someone.”

Eduardo held his hand up, warding off
Rafael’s denial before it could be spoken. “Do not be foolish.
There are only a few who find true love in their lifetime. You need
only to look upon her and you instantly know she belongs to you and
always will. It was that way with my dear wife, Catina. I will
never love that way again, so fiercely and strongly that when one
dies part of the other dies too. Each day that passes is one day
closer to the day I will be reunited with her.”

A chill raced through Rafael. His heartbeat
quickened. His breathing grew labored. The thought of Gaby dying
flashed through his mind and it frightened him beyond belief.

“The decision remains yours, Rafael,”
Eduardo said. “I will welcome you as a son-in-law if that is your
wish. But think upon what I said... and choose wisely.”

“My decision will benefit all,” Rafael
insisted. “I will do what is necessary.”

A sad little smile touched Eduardo’s lips.
“I never doubted you would. Now how about that drink?”

~~~

“
Madre de Dios!”
Lupe said, crossing
herself. “Don Rafael will kill you if you do not kill yourself
first.”

“Be still, Lupe,” Gaby ordered. “You
frighten him.”

“Good, the horse has more sense than
you.”

Gaby stroked the dark flesh of the
stallion’s neck while whispering softly and reassuringly near his
ear.

Lupe crossed herself again before she spoke.
“You cannot ride this horse. You are only a servant here and have
no permission.”

Gaby stepped back away from the animal, not
wanting the woman’s tense tone to frighten the already skittish
stallion. “Dona Maria has ordered me to see that Don Joseph gets
this note immediately,” she said, patting the folded paper tucked
in her waist band.