Untamed (60 page)

I tap my nails against ceramic, realize that I can’t even keep a steady beat. My fingers are trembling. I’ve researched it all, looked it up online, but I only feel one of the early warning signs of pregnancy: My nipples tingle. Beyond that, I haven’t been feeling unusually tired, and I haven’t been feeling sick. I don’t ache, and I’m not irritable. My appetite hasn’t changed at all, either.

I sigh. They say morning sickness won’t come for another two weeks. I’m almost afraid to buy a test. In my mind, maybe I can hold out a few more days. Maybe I’m just late, maybe I’ve just been too stressed at school. Maybe…

I can’t be pregnant
.
Not now.

Not with him!

I’ll wait. Just a few more days. I’ll wait a week, and then I’ll buy a pregnancy test. For a moment, just a fleeting moment, I think about mentioning this to Duncan.

But immediately I know I’m not going to. I don’t know for sure, yet. I don’t know anything, yet. I don’t want to scare him.

I don’t know what he’ll think!

“What’s wrong?” he asks instantly as I enter the dining room.

“Nothing,” I say. “I’m tired.”

He looks like he’s about to press, and so I put up a hand, shake my head. “Really, I’m fine. I just want to leave this place.”

“Then let’s go.”

We leave the house without saying bye to Dad, and I go back to his apartment with him. Both our moods are subdued as we no doubt consider the future.

Duncan likely wonders about his fight with Manic. He’s probably going through the moves in his head, over and over. How to counter this, that, when to strike, when to turtle.

And me… well, I’m only thinking about one thing.

And it just goes round and round in circles in my mind.

I have no idea what I’m going to do.

Chapter Twenty Four