UnderFire (6 page)

* * * * *

Kathleen was reasonably certain she’d lost her mind. She
looked around the holiday chaos in Danelle and Patrick’s big living room at
their house in the woods outside of town. Her friends joked and seemed to be
having a great time. Kathleen, however, could only worry about how things would
turn out this weekend for all of them. It was driving her batty.

Kathleen and Jake had arrived early with the food they’d
promised to bring. Lena and Rick had arrived separately and Melanie and Matt
had come in one car. It seemed in one way or another they were all still tied
together. She wondered how much longer the dream would last. Kathleen kicked
herself all over the place because she hated that deep pessimism she seemed to
have been born with—or that she’d learned from her father’s relentless cruelty.

All she could think about was how sexy Jake had looked as
she’d ridden him to a breath-stealing orgasm. When she’d danced to the raunchy
song and taken total control of their lovemaking, she’d wondered why she’d felt
safe enough with him to let it all hang out. It hadn’t mattered. Deep primal
craving had stirred her until she’d discarded caution. She’d never participated
in sex that raw before and it scared her in a way she didn’t understand at
first. She knew she wanted him with a potent desire that wouldn’t disappear.

Across the room Jake laughed at something Rick said, and she
ached. Ached like she had some sort of lovesickness, damn it. A new song came
over the digital television’s music station. The melody had a soft but sexy
beat and spoke of love lost and found. Kathleen wanted to smack herself for
noticing and connecting everything to her growing feelings for Jake Frasier.

Cold weather outside mocked her. She wanted to be locked
away with Jake for the next several weeks doing nothing but having mind-numbing
sex and sleeping. As she watched the men joking around, her gaze wouldn’t leave
Jake. While Matt, Rick and Patrick were undeniably good-looking men, feelings
swamped over her whenever she heard that low, slightly raspy voice that
belonged only to Jake. She found it hard to concentrate and recognized she’d
become so infatuated with him she couldn’t see straight. She tried to tell
herself not to think beyond Saturday. He’d be gone on Sunday and then she’d
return to Los Angeles and make decisions on what to do with the rest of her
life. An empty ache started low in her stomach at the thought of Jake not being
somewhere in the picture.

“Come on, ladies.” Danelle headed toward her master bedroom.
“We have some girly stuff to do.”

The guys grunted like only men could, the sounds primitive
and predictable. Kathleen and the others followed Danelle like the good friends
they were. She wanted them to try on the dresses one last time to make sure no
last-minute adjustments would be needed. Thankfully she was also a damn good
seamstress in her own right if anything required fixing. They all slipped into
their dresses. The gentle blush-pink color of their long gowns complemented the
understated elegance of Danelle’s full-length cream-colored off-shoulder dress
and its short train. Nothing featured too much frippery or finery, just clean
lines and grace. The ensemble of dresses fit everything in Danelle’s wedding
perfectly.

Danelle smiled, tears in her eyes as she looked into the
mirror above the dresser. “Everyone looks so pretty.” She laughed. “I’d say
group hug but we’d get wrinkled.”

“Hell with that, group hug anyway,” Kathleen said as tears
welled in her eyes too.

The girls huddled together and giggled. Kathleen allowed the
totally girl side of her to emerge. Tears touched her eyes too but she quickly
made sure they disappeared before her friends could see them.

“We’re pathetic. We’re crying over weddings and dresses,”
Kathleen said.

As Melanie unzipped Danelle’s dress, Danelle said, “You love
weddings. Why the cynicism?”

“Why?” Kathleen’s hands went up. “Eight times a bridesmaid.
I want to start planning weddings so I don’t have to be in them all the time.”

Lena grinned at her as she stepped out of her dress and
stood in bra and panties. “Maybe you can plan a wedding for Melanie and Matt.
The way they’ve been drooling over each other makes me think they’ll be next.”

Melanie turned read and swatted Lena’s arm, then she threw
her friend a tight grin. “Shut up.”

They laughed, and Kathleen loved the lightheartedness that
surrounded their little group. “We’ll remember this day. Hell, we’ll remember
the entire last week for more than one reason.”

“That’s for certain.” Danelle sat on the bed and her face
had turned serious. “You know, if anything had happened to you guys…” Tears
welled up.

“Damn.” Lena sat on the bed next to her and put her arm
around her friend. “It’s all right.”

Danelle sniffed as her eyes swam with tears. “I’d like to
blame this on hormones but it’s not. I think every day about what might have
happened, how this all would have ended so much differently if…”

As Danelle trailed off, Kathleen allowed herself to go
there. Her throat went tight. “I’m glad Jake was there in the supply closet. I
know we would have made it out all right but he protected me. He was a rock. He
protected everyone in there, even that awful man.”

Danelle took the tissue Melanie handed her and Melanie sat
on the other side of Danelle. “All the guys were wonderful. There’s no denying
that. I was so damned scared in that bathroom. I thought… I don’t know what I
thought. I was worried about what was happening to all of you.”

Danelle took a big breath and let it out. “Sorry. Sorry.”
She stood. “I didn’t mean to start this. Let’s get out there before the men
take over the universe and convince us they’re the best thing since sliced
bread.”

“Okay, bitches,” Kathleen said in mock seriousness, “it’s
time to eat. Just don’t eat too much or none of us will fit into our dresses
Saturday.”

The other woman laughed again.

Danelle hung her dress on a padded hanger and slid it into a
special place in her closet. “There’s tea tomorrow. We can’t starve until
Saturday. I want you ladies to have a good time. Let’s enjoy ourselves.”

They would have enjoyed it a bit more but as they stepped
out of Danelle’s bedroom, Rick said something that put a damper on the entire
thought.

“Weddings. I’m not ever getting married,” Rick said.

Lena’s face fell like a cake.

* * * * *

As Jake drove Kathleen back to the hotel, Kathleen sank deep
into her thoughts. After Rick had said he never wanted to get married the
atmosphere of the holiday had chilled slightly. Kathleen stepped into the dead
silence by rounding everyone up to put out the rest of the Thanksgiving food.
Talk about the possibility of testifying and the shooter’s trial came up.
Kathleen’s voice cracked when she said all she wanted to do was forget it had
happened. When Jake had taken her hand, the comfort that had flowed from his
touch had brought a huge lump to her throat. Lena seemed most traumatized by
the mall incident, and although Rick tried to reassure her, his earlier
statement about weddings had visibly put a damper on her interest in listening
to his advice.

“Rick stepped in it tonight,” Kathleen said as they entered
her hotel room.

Jake shut the door but didn’t take his coat off. She threw
hers across the straight-back chair.

Bewilderment covered his face. “How?”

Kathleen sat on the bed and pulled off her boots. She let
them thud to the floor. “He said he never wanted to get married.”

Jake still didn’t look enlightened. “So?”

Kathleen flopped back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. “You’re
a man. You wouldn’t get it.”

He made one of those eternally male grunts that conveyed
disagreement. “Okay, so I’m a guy. Sue me. I kind of resent your assumption
that all men are a bunch of gorillas who have no sensitivity at all.”

His response surprised her, and so did the vehemence in his
voice. Still, she was on a roll. “He obviously doesn’t have a clue that what he
said hurt Lena.”

Jake made another one of those male noises guaranteed to
infuriate a woman. “What are you talking about?”

She folded her hands over her stomach and continued to peer
at the ceiling. “If Lena is falling for him, don’t you think that would make
her feel bad to hear he never wanted to get married?”

He leaned over the bed, placed both of his hands on the bed
near her waist and peered down at her. “Maybe. Maybe not. Not all women want to
get married. We haven’t a clue what’s going on between them or what’s happening
between Matt and Melanie. We need to stay out of their business. I don’t get
involved with my brothers’ love lives. Ever. Neither should you.”

Kathleen bristled and she glared at him. “Don’t tell me what
to do, Jake Frasier.”

His face turned to granite, eyes distant and cool. He moved
back from the bed. “I’m not your father, Kathleen. Not even that ass we were
stuck with in the supply closet.”

Defensiveness flared to life and old wounds split open. “Look,
it’s been a long day. Maybe we should call it a night.”

A darkness entered his eyes, a finality that sank her heart.

“You’re right.” He walked to the door.

She followed him, and as he opened the door she wondered if
he’d leave without a goodbye. He stood on the threshold, his dark brows drawn
down, mouth a hard line.

“Have a good night, Kathleen.”

He left without another word, without a kiss. She locked the
door behind him, then leaned her forehead against it, her mind reeling and
unable to take in what she’d experienced. Today she’d felt affection from him
and a sizzle she couldn’t deny. They’d jumped off the bridge when she’d told
him she wouldn’t be bossed around. Additional anger brought frustrated tears to
her eyes. She walked to the bed and landed facedown, the urge to growl and
punch something high on the list. Maybe it was better they cut off this fling
here and now. She had no more illusions that their relationship could move
forward. She bunched the coverlet in her fists, frustrated as her anger at him
simmered. Maybe all men felt it was okay to tell a woman what to think and what
to believe and what to do. She was over that, and even the most amazing, drop-dead
gorgeous, sexy man she’d ever met couldn’t take away who she was or change how
she wanted to run her life.

* * * * *

The next night Jake was in Patrick’s suite. Patrick’s suite
was pretty lush, for a suite in a small hotel in Constitution. Jake took in the
surroundings as he sat at a table with Patrick, Matt and Rick with an array of
beverages in front of them. The suite featured a separate bedroom, a
kitchenette, dining table and bathroom. Cozy enough digs.

“What’s wrong with you?” Rick asked Jake suddenly. “You’re
staring off into the distance.”

Jake tossed back a whiskey, the only one he planned to have
the night before the wedding. “Nothing. Best I’ve been in a long time.”

Patrick’s eyebrows went up as he sipped a beer. “Yeah? How’s
that?”

Jake grinned but there wasn’t a damn bit of humor left in
him after the previous night’s disastrous breakup with Kathleen.

“Let’s just say when your big party is over, Patrick, I’ll
be glad to see the back of Constitution,” Jake said.

“Ouch.” Matt had a pained look. “I’m right there with you,
buddy. Right there with you.”

“Uh-huh. Why do I feel as if there’s an undercurrent here I
don’t understand?” Patrick asked.

“My brothers are complicated that way,” Rick said as he
tasted his diet cola. “But I’m not in the same boat they are.”

Patrick’s blond eyebrows twitched again as he looked at his
buddies. “Oh yeah? You patch it up with Lena?”

Rick smiled. “Not talking about it.”

“Great, look at that shit-eating grin,” Jake said and tossed
a disgruntled look at Rick.

“Okay, I suppose I shouldn’t ask this but Danelle was
nagging me for answers last night.” Patrick cleared his throat and took another
swig of beer. “Danelle’s worried about the girls. She thinks you’re going to
leave Melanie, Kathleen and Lena with broken hearts.”

The guys groaned, including Jake.

Jake headed in another direction, not wanting to think of
Kathleen’s beautiful face and sexy body dancing for him. “Can we talk about
sports or something else less complicated than women?”

Rick’s smile widened to Cheshire cat status. “Women. Can’t
live with them, can’t live without them.”

“We’ve lived without them pretty well up until this point,”
Matt said.

“Nah, that’s not true.” Patrick shifted on his chair, as if
the whole conversation made him uncomfortable. “I love Danelle. I love her more
than life itself.”

Jake felt that right in the heart, and the reason stunned
him. He wanted more with Kathleen, and leaving her the previous night had torn
him up. He’d come back to the hotel and dulled his brain on useless television.
A nightmare about losing Kathleen to the mall shooter had burned into his
brain.

“All right. We’ve had a great week here for your wedding and
that’s what we should concentrate on,” Jake said.

Patrick looked at each of them, turning the beer bottle
around and around on the table. “Yeah, you’re right. I just hope you aren’t
missing out on something good with Danelle’s friends because you’re going macho
on them.”

Jake’s mouth dropped open and he saw surprise dart through
Matt’s and Rick’s expressions.

Rick wasn’t having any of it. “Look, bro, Lena’s very
special to me. Like I said the other day, I wouldn’t hurt her. I resent being
needled about it.”

Jake felt a tension growing in the air and worked to head it
off at the pass. “Uh, look, can we get back to drinking and telling dirty
jokes?”

They did, and yet for the rest of the night Jake thought
about Kathleen, his need for her burning in his mind and body. He yearned to be
back in her arms. He hoped maybe one last dance with her tomorrow would do the
trick and he could purge himself of wanting her forever.