Under My Thumb (Serenade Series #1) (5 page)

I rose from my chair. “Are you ready to go?”

She placed her napkin on the table then stood. “I am.”

I pulled her chair out then placed my hand on her waist. She was petite and slim, her wide hips narrowing into a tiny waist. I resisted the urge to squeeze her, to feel her in my grasp.

I’m such a psychopath
.

When we reached the street, I called my driver. “We’re ready.” I hung up and returned my phone to my pocket.

“Does he drive you everywhere?”

“I’m not going to fight LA traffic.”

“It must be a million times harder in a limo.” She straightened her posture then dropped her hand from my arm. I didn’t like that at all.

“I drive my car around as well. But not when I’m on a date.”

“We’re on a date?”

“What else would you call this?”

She didn’t answer my question. Instead, she watched the limo pull up.

Scott, my driver, ope
ned the backdoor. “Hope you had a lovely evening, sir.”

“We did.” I
went to the door and grabbed it. “I got it, Scott.”

“Very well, sir.” He moved into the driver’s seat.

I helped my gorgeous date into the backseat. When she bent slightly to slide in, I got a view of that ass I’ve wanted to look at. I wasn’t disappointed. My hard-on returned immediately. Damn.

I slid beside her but kept my hands to myself.

Which was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my fucking life.

She crossed her legs, her dress rising up slightly. Her thighs were toned and hard. I imagined separating them with my face.

When the awkwardness stretched, I hit the button on the stereo and turned on classical music. The silence didn’t bother me but I could tell it bothered her. I intimidated her. Clearly.

“Where to, sir?”

I turned to her, giving her the lead. “Where to, Prudence?”

She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Home.”

Damn.

“Ms. Prudence’s apartment.” The more this girl made me wait, the more I wanted her.

When we arrived at her apartment, I held the door open and escorted her out. We walked straight into the elevator. There was no music inside, just the light humming of the cables.

“I had a wonderful time tonight,” I said as the doors opened.

“Me too.” She walked beside me, still graceful in the sky-high heels.

When we reached the door, we stopped. I had to fight my natural instinct to grab her face and kiss her. I wanted to push her into the door, caging her in while I devoured her. But I held back—barely.

“I’ll pick you up at six on Saturday.”

“Sounds good.” She stared into my face
. Her gaze moved to my lips for a moment. She immediately averted it and acted like she wasn’t staring. But I knew she was. And I knew what she was thinking.

My hand moved to her lower waist. I rubbed her gently, feeling her out. She didn’t pull away but her breathing
hastened. I wanted to pull her to my chest but she’d feel my massive erection. I was about to blow any second. That’s how beautiful this girl was. She floored me with her beauty. It was so natural but fantastical at the same time.

Her hand immediately pressed against my lower stomach. She flinched when she felt the muscle underneath. When she didn’t pull away, I knew she liked it.

“Are your roommates home?” I whispered.

“I’m sure they are.”

“Well, I don’t have any roommates.” My meaning hung in the air.

Her hand didn’t leave my lower stomach. “What do you want with me
if you don’t want a relationship?”

“The exact same thing you want.”

She stared at my chest and fell silent.

“Let’s discuss it on Saturday. That’ll give you time to think about it.” I dropped my hand and returned it to my pocket.

She seemed winded when my touch ceased. She recovered instantly, hiding her true longing. Her eyes gave her away, slightly changing color when her emotions emerged. “Okay.”

Unable to stop myself, I grabbed the nape of her neck then pressed my lips to her cheek. I knew I wasn’t getting any tonight, but I wanted to feel her in some way, even if it was just her soft cheek. Her hand immediately touched mine, the one resting on her neck. But she didn’t pull it away.

The juvenile touch left me winded, which surprised me most of all. It was just a taste of her, but it was the best I’ve ever had. I desperately needed more. It only fed the beast inside me, the creature that was insatiable for this vision. I pulled away then gave her a final look. “Think about what I said—long and hard.”

Chapter Nine

♬

Prudence
Clearwater

Cash Matthews really got under my skin. But I liked it.

His confident and cool exterior continued to draw me in, although it probably shouldn’t have. When I felt the hardness of his stomach, I immediately became aroused. I didn’t need to see him naked to know he was all man underneath.

And I wanted to be underneath him.

I felt more like a slut with every passing minute.

The only guy I’d been with end
ed up breaking my heart into a million pieces. I thought I was over that relationship, but I don’t think I am. I was ignorant to his malicious ways, and blinded from the truth by my own stupidity. Those were years I’d never get back. And they only confirmed what I knew about men. They were liars, manipulators, untrustworthy, and heartbreakers. My dad was no exception. In fact, he was the biggest culprit of all. I’d never forgive him for what he did to Jeremy and I. And I certainly wouldn’t forgive him for what he did to my mom.

This reflection made me realize I wasn’t ready for a relationship. Being single for the rest of my life didn’t sound so bad. But not getting laid was unthinkable. Cash Matthews was gorgeous, charming, and sexy as hell. I definitely wanted to be under him.

Shit, I wanted to be on top.

But could I be intimate with someone I didn’t love? I wasn’t sure if I could. When Isaac and I were together, I thought I was in love with him. We were supposed to get married after college. I thought my fate was sealed
. But that was all a lie. So was it worth it to sleep with someone I thought loved me, but didn’t care about me at all? At least Cash was honest with his intentions. It didn’t seem like he was hiding anything, only his private self. Which was fine with me. I didn’t want to break down all my problems. I doubt he wanted to either.

A purely physical relationship with
minimal emotional attachment didn’t sound so bad. There was no possibility of getting hurt because I knew we weren’t serious. He could just be that booty call when I needed it. He could even be a friend. It was a lot to think about, and I decided to take my time like he suggested. But Desi wanted to give me an earful first.

“He doesn’t want to be anything serious?”

“No.” I leaned against the wall while I sat on my bed. It was late but neither one of us could sleep.

“Is it because you’re leaving in a few months?”

I knew that had nothing to do with it, but that seemed like a good excuse. “Yeah.”

“You should go for it.”

“Are you serious?” I asked.

“You just told me you weren’t ready to be with someone. This sounds pe
rfect for you. It can take you on the road to recovery. You’ll totally get over Isaac after Cash rocks your world.”

“I am over Isaac.”

“You’re still covered in his bruises.”

I hated that
.

Everyone knew I was
damaged goods after our breakup. My brother was more livid than anyone else. I remember when he beat the shit out of Isaac. It gave me a slight satisfaction when Jeremy broke Isaac’s nose. After that, I returned to being hollow and empty. My brother never mentioned it again, but he was constantly next to me, silently supporting me. He was my closest confidant. The idea of not seeing him again broke my heart…I loved my brother.

“I’m past that relationship,” I said quietly.

“But you aren’t past your past,” Desi said. “You need to let it go.”

I was tired of hearing this too. It was easier said than done. I was constantly getting my heart broken, constantly being let down, and I was sick of it. Wouldn’t it be easier just to be with someone where there
would be no possibility of heartbreak? There would be no lies, no deceit. It sounded perfect to me. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to talk to Cash about his proposition.

I pulled back the covers and l
ay in bed. “I’m tired.” I’m a horrible liar. I don’t know why I bother.

Desi got under the covers and set her alarm. “Gavin is pissed.”

“I don’t care what he is.”

“Now you believe he has a thing for you?”

“It’s pretty clear.”

“Are you going to talk to him?”

I didn’t see how I couldn’t. Since we worked together and made music together, we couldn’t avoid each other. The air needed to be cleared. I just wish he wasn’t so immature about the situation. If he acted like an adult, the conversation wouldn’t even be necessary. “Yeah.”

“I think that’s a good idea. Mason and I don’t want to get in the middle of anything.”

I closed my eyes and pretended I was asleep. The weight of the conversation gave me a broken heart. I just wanted to forget about the world for a moment and find peace in my dreams. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find it there either.

♫

We had another gig at a small bar in Hollywood. Like every show, we finished to a roaring round of applause. When I played my music and sang to an audience, I always felt at peace with the world. The lights shined brightly on us, making the audience disappear in the darkness. I only saw the glint of the stage lights reflect off their glasses and jewelry. Other than that, it was like no one was there. And that’s when I lost myself.

Despite the pleasure it brought me, I knew I needed to find a full-time gig and put my degree to use. I needed to pay rent and afford groceries. And a musician’s salary wasn’t going to give me that.

I looked online and found a pharmaceutical lab that was hiring an analytical chemist. It seemed like a boring job, but it had excellent pay and benefits. And it had weekends and nights off. It’s exactly what I needed to continue my musical hobby. I filled out an application, knowing thousands of other people filled out the same one. With a heavy heart, I knew I wouldn’t get a call back. My marks were impressive and my recommendations were even better, but that didn’t mean anything. I had no idea who my competition was.

When the night of
the Adele concert arrived, the anxiety returned. I hadn’t stopped thinking about Cash for the week. His lips always formed in my mind while I slept. They were kissing my body everywhere, moving to the area between my legs. I didn’t realize how sexual of a person I was until I met him. The thoughts were always on my mind.

I wore a
champagne pink dress and nude flats. I wanted to wear high heels to make my ass look better, but that was suicide at a concert. I’d be standing for hours. And this time, comfort was more important than style.

I le
ft my hair down and curled it at the ends. After I applied my makeup, I touched up my lips and eyes. When I looked at myself in the mirror, I saw someone I didn’t recognize. I hardly wore makeup because it was too time-consuming. It stole time away from my favorite hobby in the world, writing and playing music. But I wanted to look good. I made sure my body was completely free of hair other than my head. And I knew why.

Cash knocked on the door right at six. He was always punctual to the point of insanity. I was usually five minutes late to everything, not a good quality to have in someone searching for a job.

When I walked into the living room, Gavin stood in the kitchen. He was sipping a cup of coffee. He didn’t look at me once as I walked by.  But that was fine with me. If he wanted to be immature about the situation, I didn’t care. But I certainly wouldn’t baby him over it.

I took a deep breath before I opened the door. I pictured Cash in my mind, imagining the perfect features of his face. His chin was lightly covered in
a faint stubble. His hypnotic blues were dazzling, dark and mysterious. And his chin was kissable. I imagined trailing my lips from the corner of his mouth then to his neck.

Damn, I hadn’t even opened the door yet and I was wet.

I finally opened the door. “Hey.”

He wore a dark suit with a gray tie. Of course, he looked dashing in it. I immediately wanted to take his tie off and tie it around my own wrists.

Man, I was bad today.

“You look lovely, like always.” His hands were in his pockets, and he stood straight with
a perfect posture. He towered over me at six feet. I was a short woman, barely reaching five foot three, but he made me feel even smaller. And his comment had my heart racing. He always made me feel beautiful. It was probably a line, but it still made me feel special.