Undeniable Love - Journey of Love Book 2 (15 page)

“Hey, what’s up?” I causally asked.

“You left and didn’t give me a chance to thank you for everything.”

Giving my best smile, I tried to talk but nothing came out. Clearing my throat, I said, “Nah, you thanked me enough over the week, Ryn. It was my pleasure.”

Her eyes looked sad. “You didn’t give me a chance to explain why I answered my cell.”

Swallowing hard, my eyes darted over to where Dodge was standing, waiting for Ryn. Slowly looking back at Ryn, I asked, “Does it matter anymore?”

“I think it might,” Ryn said barely above a whisper.

Shaking my head, I looked away. “I saw the conflict in your eyes, Ryn. In that moment it was as if you had to pick—kiss me, or talk to your precious Dodge.”

Glancing back, my eyes caught hers. “I still see the conflict in your eyes, but the problem is, you picked him, Ryn.”

Starting the car, I put it in drive and pulled away.

STARING AT TRISTAN’S BMW AS
he drove away, I fought to hold back my tears. Closing my eyes, I wrapped my arms around myself. It wasn’t cold outside, but my body shook.

“Ryn? Are you okay?”

Dodges voice was filled with concern. I had asked him to coffee this morning to tell him I didn’t see our relationship going any further.

Shaking my head, I whispered, “No, Dodge. I’m not okay.”

“Let’s head inside and order some coffee, Ryn.”

Dodge placed his hand on the small of my back as he led me toward the door to Starbucks. My mind was racing as I took Tristan’s words in.

He thought I had picked Dodge. I knew those days we spent together we were getting closer. I could see it in Tristan’s eyes how many times he wanted to kiss me. Why we were both pulling away from each other, I didn’t know.

Dodge ordered both of our coffees as I mindlessly moved to a table.

I sat and stared out the window. I did know why I was pulling away from Tristan. I was scared to death to open myself back up to him. Was he interested in me because he didn’t have Liberty or Sierra around? Was I second best?

Closing my eyes, I thought to that moment when Tristan was going to kiss me and I answered my cell. The hurt in his eyes about dropped me to the floor. Then not even five minutes ago, I saw the same hurt in his eyes.

You picked him, Ryn.

Setting both coffees onto the table, Dodge pulled out a chair. Looking up, I tried to smile but I knew Dodge would know it was a ruse.

“Talk to me, Ryn.”

Taking in a deep breath, I slowly blew it out. I knew I couldn’t keep doing what I had been doing the last ten months. I was using Dodge as a means to push Tristan from my head . . . and my heart. It wasn’t working and what I needed was time alone to clear my head and think.

It was time for me to, for once in my adult life, not have a man confusing the hell out of me.

“Dodge, I wish I could sit here and tell you that I saw us moving forward but . . . I . . . I just can’t.”

Dodge looked down and then quickly back up into my eyes. He slowly nodded his head as he smiled weakly. “I guess I always knew we were just having fun.”

“I want to be completely honest with you, Dodge. I still love, Tristan.”

Dodge tilted his head and stared into my eyes. “I know that, Ryn. Believe me, I know how you feel about Tristan.”

My heart hurt for what I was doing to Dodge. Shaking my head, I said, “Dodge, did you see how Sierra looked at you today?”

Jerking his head back, Dodge laughed. “What?”

“Sierra, the way her eyes lit up when she looked at you. I see women all the time look at you just like she did. I’m holding you back and it’s not fair.”

Reaching across the table, Dodge took my hand in his. “I don’t want any other women, I want you. I’m falling in love with you, Ryn.”

I tried to dig deep down inside to say what I was about to say. “Dodge, I wish I could give you what you wanted, but I need to clear my head and figure out some things. I care about you so much and you’ve been such an amazing friend . . . but . . .”

Letting go of my hand, Dodge whispered, “But you don’t love me like you love, Tristan.”

My voice cracking, I whispered, “Dodge.”

Dodge stood and gazed down at me. He nodded his head and gave me that grin that I loved so much. “I’m not going to push you into anything or make you feel like you have to decide now. I’ll be here, Ryn. I’m not sure for how long, but for now . . . I’m here.”

I stood and moved into Dodge’s arms. “Thank you for giving me the space and time I need, Dodge.”

Pulling me closer to him, Dodge whispered against my forehead, “I’ll talk to you soon, baby.”

Dropping his arms he took two steps back. Winking, he turned and began to walk away.

Placing my hand over my mouth, I began to cry. I wasn’t sure why, but it felt as if I lost something I wasn’t ready to lose.

Walking into my house, I heard my home phone ringing. No one ever called me on my home phone. Running to it, I picked it up and hit the answer button. My ankle throbbed from the motion. It had only been a month since I sprained it and it wasn’t healing all that well.

“Hello?”

“Kathryn?”

My heart stopped beating as I heard my mother’s voice on the other end of the phone. “Mom?”

“I would have called your cell phone, but I must have misplaced it. How have you been?”

“Um . . . I’ve been good. How have you and Dad been?”

“We’ve been good. So have you had your fill of Texas yet? Are you coming home?”

Dropping my purse on the table, I rolled my eyes. “No, Mom, I’m not going to be coming back to Florida. I told you this.”

“Kathryn, this has gotten old. Your father and I have been patient with you while you’ve gone off and found yourself. Now it’s time to come back home.”

Letting out a sigh, I leaned against the counter. Here was the overbearing mother I left Florida to get away from.

“Next week is Thanksgiving, book a flight and we’ll spend a few days looking for a place for you.”

Irritation flared within me as I listened to my mother try to run my life. Again. Not this time. Hell would freeze over before I ever let my mother run my life.

“Mom, I’m a grown woman and you can’t tell me how to live my life or where to live it. I’m happy here in Austin. My business is growing and . . .”

“Oh, Kathryn, you have such a bright future here. I’ve already made plans for a friend of mine to join us for Thanksgiving dinner. I think you would be interested in hearing what she does for a living. I think a new career is exactly what you need, darling. Oh, I almost forgot. Kathryn, guess who I ran into? Your old high school boyfriend, Ward. He asked about you, darling, and I told him you would probably be home for Thanksgiving.”

Oh. My. God. Was I hearing this right? My mother was insane.

“Mom, I need you to listen to me and listen closely. First, I’m not coming home for Thanksgiving. As a matter of fact, I have no intention of
ever
coming back to Florida. Second, I don’t give a rat’s ass about Ward, Mom. And third, when you learn to accept the fact that I am happy with my life and where I have chosen to live that life, and who I want to spend it with . . . then maybe we can talk. Until then, we have nothing else to say.”

“What has happened to you, Kathryn? Your father and I just want to see you. Is it so much to ask for you to come home and see your parents?”

Sucking in a breath of air, my mother went to talk again but I cut her off. “Mom, I’d love to have you and dad here. Think about coming and visiting me here in Austin. I have a meeting, Mom, I have to go. Tell Dad I said hi and I miss him.”

Hitting End, I tossed the phone on the counter and stood there for a few moments. Shaking my head, I decided to not let my mother get under my skin today.

Reaching in my purse for my cell phone, I pulled it out. Scanning my phonebook, I saw Sierra’s number. For one brief moment, I wanted to call her and see if she wanted to go to dinner and hit a club. I knew the only reason I wanted to see her was to find out about her and Tristan. Mainly Tristan.

Shaking my head, I kept scanning until I found Marie’s number. I’d met Marie at a conference in Chicago last year and we hit it off fabulously. A night out was just what I needed.

Heading to my closet, I pulled out my latest little black dress and looked it over. Smiling, I hit Marie’s name and began making plans to let loose for the evening.

PULLING UP TO THE FRONT
of Midnight Rodeo, I quickly got out of my BMW and smiled at the valet driver. Tossing him my keys, he nodded his head. “Enjoy your evening, Mr. Williams.”

“I intend to,” I said with a wink and a smile. Making my way into the club, the bass moved through my body and instantly had my dick coming to life. Heading over to the bar, I motioned for Renee and she gave me a quick head pop. I came in this place enough for them to know what my usual was. Taking a quick look around while I waited for my beer, I spotted Michelle. Shaking my head, I smiled. That woman would never get tired of this scene. She was talking to a guy who couldn’t have been more than twenty-two years old. I gave him two minutes tops before he was following her out the door.

“Here ya go, Tristan! It’s been awhile,” Renee shouted over the music.

Nodding my head, I yelled back, “Been busy.”

Winking, she gave me a thumbs-up. “It’s on the house. Enjoy yourself and stay safe.”

“Thanks, Renee.”

Renee was a thirty-three year old single mother. Her five-year-old daughter was adorable. The only reason I’d ever met her was because I ended up with Renee one night when I couldn’t find anyone I wanted on the other side of the club. I sat at the bar and talked to her all night. Before I knew it, I was in her bed fucking the hell out of her. Renee’s ex decided to bring their daughter home early that morning before I ended up leaving.

Glancing back over to Michelle, I couldn’t help but notice the poor kid she had successfully wrapped around her finger. Taking him by the hand, she led him out of the club. Shaking my head, I looked at my watch. “She’s still got it.”

Taking a drink of my beer, I scanned the dance floor. The other side of the club was just an extension of the main club. Most people knew you only made your way over there if you were interested in hooking up for a night of good hard fun. Some though, just went over because they were able to dance and have a bit more hands on fun. It wasn’t a sex club and anyone caught having sex was thrown out immediately.

After not really seeing anyone of interest, I began making my way over to the other side. Kesha’s “Sleazy” was playing and there was some hot and heavy dancing going on.

A brunette walked up to me smiling. “Dance with me, handsome?”

Grabbing her hand, I made my way to the dance floor. What I needed was a mindless fucking. Someone to bury my cock in and forget all the other shit going on in my life.

Once we started dancing, I had a feeling I’d found my fun for the night. Turning, she pushed her ass into my dick and began rocking against me. She grabbed my hands and pulled them up to her tits as I grabbed them and moaned against her neck. “You want to be fucked, honey?”

Turning to me, she ran her tongue along her top teeth. “You like to play?”