Trying the Knot (29 page)

“But you just got here,” Nick pointed
out.

Time dragged while an ailing patient down the
hall coughed without end. Nick moved opposite Thad with the door to
his back. Bedridden Vange acted as a barrier between them. Without
even glancing down at Vange, he nodded his head and said decidedly,
“Chelsea’s right, you are too chicken shit.”

Thad stared up at the ceiling and murmured
under his breath, which Nick asked him to repeat louder. Widening
his eyes, Thad pointed toward the door and said, “Just forget
it.”

“No, Thad, you forget it,” Nick whispered
forcefully to his future cousin-in-law. Evangelica’s deep breathing
filled the space between them, but neither acknowledged her
unconscious presence. “You just forget any intention you might have
of telling Kate about last night. What went on between Vange and I
means nothing.”

“I know—

“No, I don’t think you do know. Thad, one
last fling in the bushes doesn’t merit this,” Nick said, and he
pointed downwards at his comatose, periodic one-night stand. “I’m
not the one at fault here, so don’t think you’ve got to purge
yourself of imaginary guilt by unloading everything onto Kate—

“Nick,” Thad interrupted as he motioned
toward the door, but the well-intended gesture was futile as it was
incomprehensible.

Nick had sat next to Kate’s bedside mulling
over this long awaited encounter. He raged repeatedly and
uncharacteristically inside his own head, over and over. He was not
about to be cut off or let the moment pass without his having had
his say. With his back to the door, Nick said disgustedly, “Kate’s
white trash family has already done enough to ruin this wedding.
She doesn’t need you icing the cake.”

“I wouldn’t do that.”

“Then what the hell were you thinking telling
Chelsea that Vange and I messed around last night?”

“It was a mistake, I’m sorry.”

“Kate’s a basket case as it is, and now that
self-righteous, joyless bitch is breathing down my neck to tell
Kate what’s none of her business. Kate doesn’t need any more drama
right now, so you’d better have a talk with Chelsea.”

Thad lifted his hands in protest. “But Nick
–

“Does what I just said make any sense to you
at all?” Nick was growing increasingly desperate to get his point
across, and he was intent on making it by any means necessary.
“What will it take to get through to you? What if I told Kate about
the time you made that drunken pass at me? And don’t even try to
deny it, you little closet case.”

“Uh, Nick, um.” Thad remained flustered and
speechless as mounting fear reflected clearly in his horror-filled
eyes. He again motioned at the door and shook his head anxiously,
but he could not make it evident enough that something was
seriously wrong.

“Oh, it’s different now, is it, when the
shoe’s on the other foot?” Nick asked. “I always thought you were a
helluva guy, Thad, really unique and special. I don’t think it’s
asking too much that you be reasonable.”

Thad was struck mute. To encourage a
response, Nick placed a hand on his shoulder and shook him gently.
With sympathetic understanding shimmering in his eyes, Nick said,
“Have a little empathy. Don’t say anything, okay?”

Leaning against the threshold of Evangelica’s
hospital room door, Kate stood with her arms crossed. She cleared
her throat and said, “He doesn’t have to say a thing, Nick. Because
you’ve just said it all.”

“K-Katie,” Nick stammered in shock. His eyes
widened in terror as he tightened his death grip on Thad’s
shoulder.

Calculatedly looking past him, as if she were
counting the ceiling tiles above his head, Kate said calmly, “You’d
better go now.” She was still wearing her dead mother’s too large,
but tasteful mail order dress. Shoeless, she appeared petite and
vulnerable.

“Kate, I think we need to talk,” Nick said.
He was genuinely unnerved by her resolute calm and apparent
indifference.

“I think you’ve already said everything there
is to say.”

Nick remained frozen in the same position she
found him. His grip on Thad’s shoulder grew excruciatingly tight;
although he winced in pain, Thad made no effort to move.

With her arms folded, Kate said off-handily
with calibrated coldness, “You screwed her, and she tried to kill
herself. Now she’s in a coma, what more needs to be said?”

“Katie—

“Please, Nick, go away,” she whispered as if
afraid of rousing her comatose stepsister. Kate’s trembling hands
reached for her own temples, and she pulled her tousled hair away
from her sleepy face. Her bloodshot eyes were encircled with purple
rings, and her deliberate, calmness made her appear disconnected
from reality. “Please, get out of here, or I’ll leave.”

“You don’t want to do that, Katie. We need to
talk this through,” Nick said with a trace of hope, but she turned
away and left the room without looking back. With Thad’s shoulder
still gripped in his hand, Nick pulled him close and spat
furiously, “Now look what you’ve done.”

Thad struggled to free himself from Nick’s
grip, and the bed was jarred in the process. Evangelica’s hand
slipped off her chest and dangled limply off the mattress. They
jumped back as if they had disturbed a resting corpse, but then
Nick pushed Thad so hard it sent him reeling backwards onto the
floor. Although Nick was larger, Thad had never seen him so angry
as to touch anyone in an overtly violent manner. Visibly shaken
Thad stumbled to his feet and brushed himself off as he watched
Nick charge from the room.

Across the hallway, Kate searched her purse
to find her set of keys, and Nick remained cautiously hopeful
blocking the doorway. Increasingly frustrated, Kate dumped the
contents of her handbag on the floor and searched for the keys on
all fours. Approaching her with trepidation, he carefully placed
his hands on the back of her shoulders, but she shirked away from
his nausea-inducing touch.

He reached out for her, but Kate tore away
and snapped, “Don’t you dare come near me.”

“You’ve got to listen,” Nick said.

“The hell I do,” she whispered loudly, and
her voice cracked. She snatched up her keys and scrambled for the
door. “Like hell I have to listen to you.”

“Honey, wait,” Nick begged. He lunged for her
and attempted to pull her close, but she squirmed from his arms and
grappled for the doorway. Then she did something he was fully
unprepared for, she whirled around and charged at him with all her
might.

“You just stay the hell away from me,” Kate
blurted. “Don’t you come near me, don’t follow me, and don’t try
see or touch me ever again.”

She ran through the long corridor leading to
the hospital Emergency exit. Racing behind her, his footsteps
pounded as he narrowed the gap in close pursuit.

Thad followed Nick who pursued Kate, and he
remained standing on the curb of the parking lot where he watched
her climb into the Jeep Wrangler. Nick flung open the passenger
door and called out her name. He attempted to board the moving
vehicle, but she sped away with the door flailing open. As she tore
out of the parking lot, a loud screeching noise echoed in the rainy
darkness.

Without looking back, Nick started on foot in
the direction of the speeding Jeep.

Once in his car, Thad lit a cigarette and
pulled up next to the solitary roadside figure and opened the door
for him, but Nick continued walking without offering even a
sideways glance at the moving car. Nick then kicked a dent in the
car door as he slammed it shut with his foot.

Nick vowed menacingly, “If anything happens
to her, I’m holding you personally responsible.”

Thad stopped the car and rolled down the
window. “Here take this,” Thad offered a cigarette to the reluctant
pedestrian. Nick accepted the peace offering and waved him onwards.
Thad refused to drive away until Nick finally climbed into the
vehicle.

They drove in tense silence as Thad pursued
any one of a multitude of destinations Kate may have feasibly fled.
At every stop sign, Thad appeared to be in pain as if the most
basic decision, right or left, was too difficult to fathom. The
slowly creeping Datsun and its indecisive driver quickly wore on
Nick’s nerves.

“It’s too bad you had to witness that scene,”
Nick said, letting the passing minutes alleviate the tension
between them.

“It’s okay,” Thad mumbled. His car was
stopped under Portnorth’s only traffic light, and despite prodding
car honks from behind, Thad was unsure which direction to
pursue.

“What’s wrong with you?” Nick asked. “Turn
left.”

“Sorry,” Thad said, and he accelerated with a
flourish in the direction of the lakeside park.

“You’re so passive, it’s irritating.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Nick said, and he cringed as Thad
reticently pulled up to yet another stop sign. “Would you rather I
drive?”

“No. I’m sorry,” Thad said again. He lit two
cigarettes and handed one to Nick.

“You’ve got big problems,” Nick said as he
accepted the smoke. “Thanks.”

“I have problems?”

“You’re too cynical, Thad. I don’t think
you’re ever sincere. Don’t you have any dreams?”

“They’re not so different than yours.”

“It’s sad. You’re sad. It doesn’t seem you
have any dreams, none at all whatsoever,” Nick said with a sigh.
“Why the Christ are we parked? Go past the beach.”

Swerving over the centerline, Thad looked
over at his flustered passenger and remarked, “I could almost kiss
you right now.”

“See, what I mean – everything’s a freaking
joke with you,” Nick said impatient as he pitched the cigarette out
the window.

As they drove past the lakeside park, Thad
remained quiet, and Nick thanked him again for the ride and smokes.
There was no sign of Kate anywhere. The decrepit Datsun was
traversing along so slowly Kate could have very well driven off the
boat harbor pier into Lake Huron, and her body could have washed
halfway to Canada.

“That’s what’s so great about you, Nick,”
Thad said, “you’re always so sincere, it’s almost
embarrassing.”

“Well, at least my whole life isn’t one big
joke.”

“It isn’t?” Thad inquired, and he pulled into
Kate’s father’s driveway. All the lights were on in the house, but
it appeared no one was home. Thad unintentionally dropped Nick off
at the least likely place Kate would have ever gone to of her own
free will, even if her life depended on it.

Nick thanked Thad again for the ride, and he
reassured him everything would be worked out once he found Kate.
After saying their goodbyes, Nick grabbed Thad by the nape of the
neck, shook him firmly and gave him a light slug on the shoulder.
Thad punched Nick gently on the thigh and smiled awkwardly.

“What?” Nick asked

“Good luck,” Thad said, “you’ll need it.” And
he gave Nick a shove toward the door.

Nick remained in the car for a few
uncomfortable moments, looking sad and questioning and then he
slowly exited the vehicle. As Thad drove away, Nick hung out alone
in the deserted, rain-drenched driveway wondering what to do
next.

chapter fourteen

Jack pointed skyward. “There’s the big
dipper.”

Unimpressed, Tristana said, “Anyone can find
the big dipper.” His head rested on her bare stomach, and she raked
her fingers through his dirty blond, tangled hair.

“Orion’s over there,” Jack said, and he
wrongly indicated the cluster of stars he guessed comprised the
constellation of Orion.

“You’re full of shit,” Tristana said. She
guided his face close to her own, gazed into his slate gray eyes
and whispered, “But you’re pretty good for a virgin.”

“Who said I’m a virgin?” he asked, secretly
satisfied he managed to please at least one person in his short
lifetime, even if it was some freaked out Goth chick who would
become his sister in-law tomorrow after the wedding ceremony.

As they lay in silence, he recalled that a
mere forty minutes ago they had a played a game of strip
hide-n-seek. She sprung the idea on him when his frightened,
anticipating prick suffered a case of performance anxiety. To
remedy that small obstacle, Tristana suggested she chase him
through the hallowed halls of the abandoned junior high.

Vacant classrooms, dusty hallways, and
forgotten nooks and crannies provided abundant opportunities to
lose and find each other again and again in the moonlit darkness.
The expansive structure was a decaying relic and testimony to the
pride Portnorth once took in educating its youth. At one time, the
town must have seemed more connected to a world greater than its
three-mile radius. The deteriorating spacious school was centrally
located near Main Street, but its colorful murals and shiny
varnished surfaces had long since been abandoned for a gloomy,
one-story complex along the highway on the outskirts of town.

When her It Boy finally became comfortable
with his enviable fate, Tristana chased him into the planetarium
where their game was consummated upon his capture.

In the stagnant circular domed room, they
rolled across the filthy floor under a simulated night sky.
Whenever Jack felt the urge to explode within the slithering
condom, he gazed out into the empty seats and imagined the slick,
zitty class of 1958 studying them intently. As Jack found his way
deep inside her, they melded into one another moving to the rhythm
of a wholesomely pure, mutually unadulterated need.

Jack simultaneously kneaded her arching back
and mouthed her augmented breasts, while she drank up the sweat
cascading over the scars etched across his chest. Only when she had
taken him into the recesses of her enveloping wetness, deeper than
he had ever imagined possible, did he burst to the sounds of her
moans. As tiny particles of himself exploded inside of her, he
registered the stampeding cheers of the class of ’58. Greasers,
squares, bobbysoxers, and beatniks leapt to their feet and
applauded the spectacle before them; this was one planetarium show
that well exceeded their wildest expectations.