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Authors: Jules Bennett

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Eighteen

Z
ara’s hands shook—from anger, from hurt, from the urgency to get the hell out of here. She couldn’t get dressed quick enough.

“You’re not leaving.”

Zara yanked a sweatshirt over her head. “If I have to walk home, I’m not staying with you another second. I refuse to be with a liar and a manipulator, with a man who claims to care for me, yet you lie about everything.”

Braden stood, grabbed a pair of boxer briefs and jerked them on before coming around the side of the bed. “There’s so much about my business I can’t share with you, Zara. We do what we have to do, and, yes, we use people, we’ve lied, we’ve cheated. But everything you and I have shared was genuine and real.”

“Real?” she cried as she turned to him, her hands propped on her hips. “How can anything be real when the trust was clearly one-sided? Do you know how hard I fought what was happening between us? I kept telling myself that we couldn’t get involved, that anything I felt for you was all superficial. Your power, your charm, everything about you drew me in, and then you went and showed me that sweet, caring side that had my guard coming down.”

Zara refused to give into the sting of tears. She blinked them away before continuing, because if he wanted honesty, he was about to get it.

“I believed everything you said to me,” she went on, her tone softening because the fight was going out of her. “I believed every touch, every promise. The fact that you sought me out to purposely use me cuts me like nobody else’s actions or words ever has. How did you plan on getting into my house once you hired me? Seduction? You succeeded. I guess this storm really played well into your hands.”

Another thought gripped her. “Shane warned me your family were liars and manipulators. I ignored him because I thought he was jealous. Looks like he might have had my best interest at heart after all.”

“Zara.”

He started to reach for her, but she stepped back, bumping into the small table her suitcase laid on. She skirted around it, never taking her eyes off him.

“Do you think I’m going to let you touch me? You did this. You destroyed something I was starting to hope for, something I’d already settled into. Damn it, Braden, I was falling for you, and you betrayed everything good that I had in my life. My self-confidence, my business, us.”

She let out a lifeless laugh at his pained expression. “There never was an
us
, though. There was you sneaking behind my back, using me, and then there was me being naive and hopeful.”

“Would you listen to me?”

Braden took a step forward and came within inches of her. Zara refused to back up, back down. She would put up a strong front before him if it killed her. She could collapse later in the privacy of her empty home.

“The deceit started when I hired you for who you were. I can’t deny that. And, yes, I wanted to find a way into your house by gaining your trust. But the moment I got into your house, the second I touched you intimately, something changed for me. I still wanted to find what I came for, but I also wanted you and not just in bed. You did something to me, Zara. I can’t let you go.”

He seemed so heartfelt, so genuine, yet none of that mattered because it all came down to the fact he’d lied and betrayed her.

“You have no choice,” she retorted, crossing her arms over her chest to keep more hurt from seeping into her heart. “You should’ve come clean before you took me to bed, because now all I think is you slept with me to gain my trust. You manipulated me, used my feelings.”

Zara glanced around the room and let out a sigh. Ignoring Braden, she pushed past him to gather her things from the bathroom. Her eyes darted to the garden tub where memories had been made. Never again would she be a fool over a man. She should’ve listened to her heart in the first place.

Grabbing her lotion, toothbrush, bubble bath and razor, Zara came back out and dumped it all into her suitcase. She didn’t care if anything leaked over her clothes; she had bigger issues at the moment.

With a swift jerk, she zipped up her luggage and turned back to Braden, who still hadn’t moved. “I want someone to take me home. Not you.”

The muscle in Braden’s jaw ticked as he nodded. “Ryker is still here. I’ll have him take you.”

Zara extended the handle on her suitcase and started for the door. When Braden reached for it, she shot him a look. “Don’t touch it. From here on out, I need nothing from you.”

Before she could open the door, Braden slapped his hand on it, caging her between the wood and his hard body. “I’m letting you walk away because you need to think about this, about us. But I’m not giving up on you, Zara. You know in your heart everything between us was real. You felt it in my touch. That’s something even I can’t lie about.”

Zara closed her eyes, wishing she could stop his words from penetrating so deeply into her heart. He’d already taken up too much space there. Surrounded by his heat, his masculine scent, Zara needed to get out of here where she could be alone and think without being influenced by this sexy man...a man she’d thought had a heart of gold. He only proved those men didn’t exist.

“Let me go,” she whispered. “I can’t be here. I can’t do this. Romance isn’t real after all, is it?”

When his hand settled on her shoulder, she nearly lost it. Because no matter what he’d done to her, she couldn’t just turn off her feelings.

“Don’t shut me out,” he whispered against her ear.

Steeling herself against his charms, his control over her, she shifted so his hand fell away. “You shut yourself out.”

“Let me get dressed and I’ll find Ryker for you.”

Zara threw him a look over her shoulder. “I’ll find him. I’ve already told you from here on out, you’re not needed.”

Pushing away, she opened the door and headed out into the hall. She’d never met this Ryker Braden had talked about, but surely she could find him and get the hell out of here.

She’d wait outside in the freezing cold if she had to. It couldn’t be any colder than the bedroom they’d shared.

* * *

Awkward was such a mild word for this car ride back to her house. And because the roads were still covered, the trip took twice as long.

Zara didn’t dare glance over to her driver. The man was built like a brick wall with coal-black hair and dark eyes. She could easily see why he was the O’Sheas’ go-to guy. He had that menacing, brooding look down perfectly. Fitting for being the right-hand man for a lying, cheating family.

And the scar running along his neck? The man had barely said a word to her other than “hi” and “the truck is over here,” but he had badass written all over him.

“I’ve never pried into Braden’s personal life.”

Zara jerked in her seat at the deep tone and the fact he was actually going to bring up the proverbial elephant parked in the truck with them. “Then don’t start now,” she countered.

“I owe him,” Ryker said simply before continuing. “He’s never brought a woman back to the house, so whatever is going on between the two of you, it’s serious. The O’Sheas are a private family. Other than the parties in the ballroom, no outsiders come into their home.”

And that told her more than she needed to know. They were all hiding something.

Zara stared out the window. “You may owe him loyalty, but I owe him nothing. He’s a liar.”

Silence enveloped them once more. Zara folded her arms, pulling her coat tighter around her. She couldn’t get warm, and it had nothing to do with winter hanging on for dear life.

“What did he tell you?” Ryker finally asked. The cautious way he phrased the question put Zara on alert.

She turned in her seat to face him, no longer caring how menacing this man was. “I assume you know full well why he wanted in my house, since you’re like a brother to him.”

Ryker’s silence told her everything she needed to know. She refused to discuss this further with a stranger—not only a stranger, but one who was devoted to Braden.

As they neared her house, Zara’s anger bubbled and intensified. Not only had Braden lied to her, he’d had a whole damn team of people in his corner. She hadn’t thought of this sooner, but no doubt his brother and sister knew, too. She’d been made a fool by the entire family.

Ryker pulled on to her street, rounded the truck into her drive and put the vehicle in Park. Just as she reached for the handle, he spoke up once again.

“I offered to break into your house while you were staying with Braden.” Ryker’s dark eyes met hers, holding her in place. “He refused because he didn’t want to betray you anymore.”

A lump formed in her throat. “I’m glad he feels guilty.”

“That wasn’t just guilt. You know exactly what he feels for you.”

Zara didn’t want to think about what Braden’s true feelings for her were because he had a warped way of showing them. Added to that, was she seriously sitting here having a heart-to-heart chat with a man who looked like an extra from a mafia movie?

Jerking on the handle, Zara stopped. She wanted to keep the upper hand, she wanted Braden to know she was in control of her life. What better way than to call him on his betrayal?

Zara glanced back to Ryker. The man’s intense gaze still locked on her.

“Come on in,” she invited. “You want to know if those coveted scrolls are here. I have no idea, but if they are, they’re technically mine since I own the house. But you’re more than welcome to come and look.”

“And if I find them?”

Zara shrugged. “Then it sounds like Braden and I will have some business to discuss.”

Ryker eyed her another minute, and she didn’t know if she was more afraid if he came inside or if he didn’t.

Nineteen

“T
he hell you say?”

There was no way Braden heard right.

“She invited me inside to look around,” Ryker repeated.

Braden sank down into his leather office chair and processed Zara’s shocking actions. Ryker remained standing on the other side of the desk, the man never ready to fully relax.

“I didn’t go,” Ryker added. “Whatever is going on between the two of you is something I want no part of, and it’s so much more than the scrolls at this point.”

Braden didn’t want to be part of this mess, either, but unfortunately he’d brought it all on himself and he was screwed.

“I’ll take care of this,” Braden promised. “You have more work to do. We have a piece in Versailles that needs to be acquired before the May auction, too. I have the specs here.”

Braden slid the folder across his desk. Without picking it up, Ryker flipped it open and started reading. Laney had done all the online investigating. She was a whiz at hacking without leaving even the slightest clue anyone had done so. She was invaluable to the family.

Braden knew Ryker would take things over from here, which was good because Braden had no energy to put into this project right now. His mind was on Zara and the fact she’d so easily invited Ryker into her home to search.

Was she playing a game? Mocking him? Was she seriously just going to let him search with no strings attached?

As much as Braden wanted to rush over and figure out what the hell she was thinking, he also wanted to give her space. He wouldn’t give her too much, but he wanted her to miss him, to realize that they were good together and his actions had been justified in the beginning.

Ryker tapped the folder on the desk. “I’ll take care of it. I’m heading to my apartment, if you need me for anything.”

Braden nodded and waited until Ryker had stepped out before he braced his elbows on his desk and rested his head in his palms. What the hell was he going to do? He’d messed this up. In the beginning, had he known he would’ve fallen for her, he would’ve confessed what he wanted. But he’d never known any other way than to take what he wanted and not worry about feelings or personal issues cropping up.

Braden cursed himself as he slammed his fists on to the glossy desktop. Just as he pushed away, his cell vibrated. Glancing at the screen, Braden didn’t recognize the number. He wasn’t in the mood to chat, but he never knew when it was a business call. For the O’Sheas, business always carried on, no matter what was going on in their private lives.

Braden grabbed the phone and slid his fingertip across the screen. “Hello.”

“What the hell did you do to Zara?”

Stunned by the rage-filled tone, it took Braden a minute to place the caller. “Why are you calling me, Shane?”

“I went by her house to check on her, and she’d been crying.”

Braden wasn’t stupid; he figured Zara had cried, but he wanted to give her space. Still, the thought of her alone in that big house, crying with no one to hold her, comfort her, other than the cat, gutted him.

No one, but the prick Shane.

“How the hell do you know I did anything?” Braden asked.

“Because I know you, O’Shea. And now that she’s done with you, I’m moving full-force into winning her back. Just thought you should know.”

That arrogant, egotistical tone slammed into him.

“You went to her house?” Braden jerked to his feet. Gripping the phone, he started for the door. “Stay away from what’s mine. You won’t be warned again.”

Braden disconnected the call and quickly shot off a text to Ryker. Yes, he was in the same house, but Braden wasn’t wasting any time. He wanted Shane dealt with right now, and while Braden would love being the one to do so himself, Braden had someone else who needed his attention even more.

* * *

Zara tugged on the old bed until it was beneath the window. She’d worked up a sweat, but finally her bedroom was rearranged. She needed it to be different, because every time she’d walked in here, she’d seen Braden. He consumed her entire home, and Zara was trying like hell to rid the house of memories. Unfortunately, they were permanently embedded into her mind, her heart.

She’d only been home an hour when her electricity kicked back on. Making good use of the time, she washed her sheets and comforter. There was no way she would’ve been able to crawl into bed surrounded by Braden’s masculine scent...and she was almost positive Jack had an accident.

She stared over at the chaise she’d pushed near the door. She truly had no idea where to put that now that she’d changed the bed.

Zara circled her room, stopping when her eyes zeroed in on a sock, a piece of cardboard and a small towel where her bed used to be. That kitten had started a stash.

Just the thought of the kitten, of how Braden hadn’t thought twice about rescuing it, had her eyes burning all over again. She’d experienced a wide variety of emotions in the past few hours. Anger, sorrow, fury and then emptiness.

All of that stemmed from Braden. She refused to even think of all the emotions she’d felt when Shane had stopped by. Unfortunately, he’d caught her during the sorrow stage.

Zara headed down to the first floor to check on the status of her sheets. They should be dry by now, and she needed to keep focused and stay busy. She didn’t want to contemplate how bored she would be once she ran out of things to do. Even work wasn’t appealing to her right now.

Just as she hit the bottom step, her doorbell rang. The last thing she wanted was a visitor, especially if Shane decided to come back. Now she’d hit her anger stage, and he’d be sorry if he decided he still couldn’t take no for an answer.

The stained-glass sidelights provided no clue as to who her visitor was. Zara checked the peephole in the old door and gritted her teeth. She didn’t want to get into this. She truly did not want to rehash all the good, bad and sexy with the man on the other side of the door.

But she knew Braden O’Shea well enough now to know he wasn’t going away without a fight. Well, if he wanted a fight, she was ready to give him one.

Jerking the door open, Zara blocked the entrance and stared at her unwelcome guest.

“Ready to search the house?” she asked sweetly.

With his hands shoved in his black wool coat, collar up around his stubbled jawline, Braden still looked sexy. Why did he have to be so damn perfect to look at?

“I don’t want to search your house,” he told her, his jaw clenched. “I want to talk, and if you don’t want me inside, I’m more than willing to stand on your porch. The choice is yours.”

She gripped the edge of the door. “I could slam this door in your face and not give you a second thought.”

“You could,” he agreed. “But you’re not a heartless woman, Zara. And no matter what you feel now, you also still have feelings for me. You’re not the type of person who can just turn those off.”

Hesitating, trying to figure out what to do, Zara gave in and pushed the door wider. Turning on her socked feet, she headed into the living room. The door closed behind her, but she kept her back to the doorway because right now she couldn’t even face him. If he wanted to talk, he was more than welcome to do so, but Zara didn’t know if she had the strength to face him head-on.

So much for that fight she’d geared up for. Just seeing him, hearing that sultry voice thrust her back into the sorrowful stage.

“Why are you here?” she asked, wrapping her arms around her waist. “Haven’t we said enough?”

“Are you going to look at me?”

Swallowing, Zara shook her head. “No.”

“Fair enough.”

Braden’s footsteps shuffled behind her, and she braced herself for his touch, but it never came. Still, the hairs on her neck stood on end. He was close, definitely within reaching distance, yet he didn’t reach for her.

“There’s nothing I can say to undo what I did.”

Yeah, he was so close, she could feel the warmth of his breath when he spoke. He wasn’t going to make this easy on her.

“When my father was in the hospital, the doctors weren’t sure if he’d make it through the heart surgery. Dad knew, though. He knew the outcome. I could tell by the way he took my hand, asked me to find these scrolls no matter what.”

Zara bit her lip to keep it from trembling. Braden’s words, thick with emotion, were killing her. He did all of this for his family, the family he loved and a family that stood together through life’s trials. Even though she didn’t have this type of bond, she was starting to see just how important it was, and maybe Braden had been put in a rough place, torn between what he wanted and what he was bound to.

“I knew I was next in line to be in charge of everything, legal or otherwise.” Braden laughed. “You’re the only woman I’ve ever become this close to. That scares the hell out of me, Zara. My family is... We have secrets. To know you have that much power over me, to know that at any moment you could turn on me and ruin my family if you knew everything. I’m willing to risk it. That alone tells me how much I love you.”

Zara whipped around, but Braden held a finger over her lips.

“I’m not done,” he told her. “I saw how hard my dad searched for these scrolls. We believed they were still here, somewhere. We recovered an old trunk that had been here, but it proved to be a dead end a couple months ago. But when he died, I vowed to honor his wishes, to be head of the family and someone he’d be proud of. I made it my mission to find them, no matter the cost. And I knew I had to start with your home.”

His hand slid from her lips, and she had to stop herself from licking where he’d touched. She was still reeling from his confession of love. Did he mean those words? Or was he just sorry he’d actually lost at something? The scrolls...and her.

“I knew a young woman lived here, and once I found out your profession, I knew it would be easy to meet you. Everything after that fell into place so fast...”

Braden shook his head, ran a hand over his face. The stubble on his cheeks rasped against his palm. He shut his eyes for the briefest of moments before opening them. Closing the miniscule gap between them, Braden placed his hands on her shoulders.

“If I’d know how fast, how hard I was going to fall for you, I would’ve done things differently. But the past is something even I’m not powerful enough to change. All I can do is promise you I won’t lie to you again.”

Zara wanted to be tough, to step away from his touch, but she couldn’t bring herself to move.

“What makes you think I’ll believe anything you’re saying?” she asked, surprised her voice came out stronger than she actually felt. “Maybe you’re just upset that you didn’t find the scrolls. Maybe you still need me for this house, and you want my trust back for that reason alone.”

“If I wanted this house searched tomorrow, it would be done without you knowing about it.”

Zara knew he was telling the truth. And yet, he hadn’t sent Ryker when she’d been at Braden’s house. That had to count for something...didn’t it?

“Right now, all I care about is you,” he went on. “I’ve never begged for anything in my life. I’ve never had to. Damn it, Zara. I have no idea what to do to get you back. I’m in territory I’ve never been before.”

His raw honesty paralleled her own. “You think this is familiar to me?” she cried. “I’ve never had a man tell me he loved me. I have no idea whether or not to believe you.”

Those powerful hands slid up to frame her face. Braden tipped her face up. She had no choice but to look him straight in the eye.

“You want to believe me,” he murmured. “You want to believe it because your feelings are so strong and you want to hold on to that happiness... A happiness only I can give you.”

Zara reached up, gripped his wrists. She wanted to pull them away, but she found herself hanging on. “I want to be done with you, Braden. I want to be over you, but I can’t just ignore what I feel. You hurt me so deep. I’ve never been cut that deep before. My parents, guys I’ve dated, I’ve always known where I stood with them. But with you, I thought I was in one place, but I wasn’t even close.”

Braden’s thumbs stroked her skin, sending her nerves into high gear. Why did he have to come back? Why couldn’t he have just let the break be clean?

“Never again,” he promised. “You’ll never wonder where you stand with me. You’re it for me, Zara. I know you have a fear of commitment, I know where we stand right now is shaky, but I’m not giving up. I want you in my life permanently.”

One second she was listening to him profess his love, his loyalty, the next she was leaning against him, kissing him. Her mouth moved over his, her hands still gripped his wrists, but she’d needed more contact, needed Braden.

When she eased back, she licked her lips and looked into his eyes. “I can’t promise you anything. All I can promise is that we work together to see where this goes. You hurt me, Braden. That’s not something I can forgive so easily.”

He nodded, sliding his thumb across her bottom lip. “I can understand that, and it’s more than I deserve. But I’m going to be patient where you’re concerned. I don’t want anyone else with me. I don’t want to spend my life with another woman, so if we have to take this slow for you to see how serious I am, then so be it.”

She hated to bring up the bone of contention between them, but she couldn’t leave it hanging in the air.

“If you want to search this house, you can.”

The muscle in Braden’s jaw ticked, his lids lowered and he let out a sigh. “I’m not doing anything with this house or the scrolls until you and I are on solid ground.”

Zara gasped. “You’re serious,” she whispered.

“I’ve never been more serious about anyone in my life.” His lips slid over hers again for a brief second. “I meant what I said about loving you. I want to fulfill my father’s wishes, but I will love you first and always.”

Zara threw her arms around his neck, the thick coat getting in her way when she really wanted to feel him without barriers. “I hated you,” she sobbed, hating how her emotions had betrayed her, and now she was an emotional wreck. “I moved my bedroom furniture around, I washed all the blankets and sheets trying to get you out of my room.”

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