Too Close To The Fire/Too Hot To Handle (Montana Men 3) (23 page)

Lacey
giggled. Rafe had that effect on her. When she was with him, she laughed. “How ‘bout
now? Has he finally gone to sleep?”

“He’s
resting, but he’s not asleep. He misses you already, as do I.”

She
moaned, knowing if they had the time, he’d take her again.

“Your
body will adjust and get used to it.” He leaned into her and kissed her. “I
intend to give it plenty of opportunity.”

She
clung to him, her heart beating fast. He cupped her breasts, plucking at the
nipples through her shirt. “You don’t have time,” she whispered as he lifted
her shirt and leaned in to take a nipple inside his mouth.

“I
could take a later flight, spend the day inside you.” He sucked hard on her
nipple before releasing it. “Tell me not to go.”

“Danger
will be home after while.” She glanced at the bruises on her breasts and knew
they weren’t the only telling marks Rafe had left on her body. He’d loved her
well and often through the night. There were plenty of signs of his possession.
He wasn’t a gentle lover. His fingerprints darkened her inner thighs, her arms,
and her waist. Her breasts bore numerous tiny love bites. She still smelled his
scent on her skin.

He
leaned in and kissed her. “I don’t wanna go. I wanna stay here and kiss you and
make love to you until neither of us can breathe.”

Lacey
ran her fingers through his dark hair. “I don’t want you to go, either. But you
have to. I don’t want a confrontation between the two of you.”

“Lace,
sooner or later there will be a confrontation.” Rafe released the hard nipple
he’d been rubbing with his thumb and sighed.
“Fuck!
I don’t want to leave you. I don’t like it.”

She
fought the tears that burned behind her eyelids. “I know.”

“Tell
me not to go, Lace, and I won’t. I’ll remain here, face Danger with you, and
tell him about us. Hell, I didn’t know it was going to be this damn hard to
leave you behind.” His gaze shot to the marks he’d branded on her throat.

Lacey
laid her palm over them, three of them actually, all three utterly impossible
to miss.

“There’s
no way he’ll miss them, sweetheart. I don’t care if he knows I branded you, but
I don’t like leaving you to face him alone.”

“He
won’t hurt me, Rafe.”

His
lips flattened. “He already has.”

Lacey
swallowed hard. “Yes, but not physically.”

“Sometimes
emotionally is even worse than physically,” he replied.

She
watched him return to jamming clothes in his bag. His skin was tight across his
high cheekbones. He looked up, his dark face disturbed. “You don’t know how
he’ll react when the reality hits him that I touched you.” He whipped around to
face her, his face dark with rage. “Come with me, Lace. Don’t stay here.”

Silent
tears slipped down her face. She grieved, not only because he had to return to
Texas, but also because she knew, deep in her heart, when she let Rafe touch
her that was the end of everything between Danger and her. She’d accepted the
fact in her mind, but her heart was a little slower to catch up and accept it.
“I can’t just leave. I have a son. I’ll have to work out some kind of
arrangements with Danger for us to share him.”

Rafe
zipped the duffle and dropped it on the floor. “I know.
I know.
Damn it! It tears me apart leaving you here.” He grabbed
his carry-on, jerked it open, and stilled. She heard him say, “Shit.” Then he
lifted his head and locked his gaze with hers. He held a small box in his
hands. “Oh, Jesus, Lace.”

“What?”
she asked.

He
swallowed hard and rubbed a hand down his face. “I didn’t use…I never even
thought.”

Lacey
eyed the red letters written in bold script on the side of the unopened box.
Condoms. Size—Triple-X, for the endowed male.

“Oh,”
she said faintly.
“Shit.”

She
lifted her gaze to meet his. She hadn’t thought, either. From the pole-axed
expression on his face, it was obvious he didn’t want a child with her. She
slid a palm across her belly in a protective gesture. A baby? She didn’t know
if Rafe had left a life growing inside her or not, but she figured as many
times as he’d taken her and the various positions, some where her hips were
tilted in a very receptive position to take a male’s seed deep, the odds were
pretty high he had.

“By
chance, are you on the pill? Say yes.”

Lacey
shook her head. “There’s been no reason. I stopped taking them five months ago.
I’ve had no need to worry about it, until now. You don’t want a baby?”

“No.
Of course not! Not…God, Lace, I’ve never done that before. I
always
wear a condom. I don’t take
stupid, unnecessary risks. The last thing we need is a baby.” He squatted down
in front of her and brushed her hair behind her ears. “Call me, as soon as you
know, either way.”

“Right.”

Stupid,
unnecessary risks?

You bet! I’ll call immediately. Not!

She
didn’t consider the creation of a baby a stupid, unnecessary risk. It was a
life. A precious life.

How
could she have been such a blind fool?

Oh,
yeah. He’d wanted her, but now that he’d had his fun, it was time for him to
move on to the next playground. How much of what he’d said to her had been
lies? Had it all just been fun and games for him?

Lacey
clenched her fists in her lap and fought to keep from bursting into tears. Well,
here was her wake-up call. Her reality check. Fun and games over. She’d given
herself to him so easily. No challenge there. Deep inside, he must be laughing
at what an easy conquest she’d been.

He
loved her?

Doubtful.

Men tended to say the L word to a woman in
the heat of the moment, but when it came right down to it, it was all about the
sex.
Pain twisted her heart. Lacey swallowed hard. All of a sudden, she
felt as fragile as spun glass. If she made one more step in the wrong
direction, she’d crumble into thousands of grains of sand and never be whole
again.

More
fool her! She’d put all her trust and faith in Rafe, and he didn’t want a child
with her. He wanted to walk away without complications.

No,
she wouldn’t call him.

Maybe
lately, she’d been doing a piss-poor job of it, but she could damn well take
care of herself and a baby if necessary.

After
that, Lacey couldn’t bring herself to carry on polite conversation with Rafe on
their way to Havre. The drive to the airport was fraught with silent tension.
Once inside the terminal, she thought his flight would never come up so she
could leave. She desperately needed time alone, time to think and plan.

“I
don’t know when I’ll make it back here again, Lace. Perhaps it’s probably best
if I stay away, not come back at all. I think maybe you need some time.”

Shock
coursed through her veins. He was utterly deserting her? “Yes, you’re right.
That would be best,” she agreed feeling numb. “I do need some time.”

“They’re
calling my flight. I’d love to kiss you, but—” he looked around. “There might
be someone here who knows you. I have to go.”

She
watched him disappear in the throng of the holiday crowd. People going home.
People coming back home. He was right. It was best he didn’t kiss her, but oh,
she’d needed to feel his mouth on hers one last time, needed the reassurance of
his arms around her, his body pressed tight to hers, his cock at full
attention. She needed to be held.

What
was she going to do now?

The
question tumbled over and over in her mind. Should she confess to Danger what
she’d done?

Beg
his forgiveness?

No.
He wasn’t the forgiving kind.

The
one thing she knew for certain was she could no longer pretend everything was
all right or remain Danger’s wife.

When
she’d given herself to Rafe, she’d done so with the full realization her
marriage was already dead. There was no going back. No need to confess her
sins. The marks on her throat would tell their own story. The only option she
had was to leave.

Her
heart felt as if it was coated with layers of ice. Numbness and guilt ate at
her soul. She felt like an orphan standing there, silently waiting for Rafe to
turn around and wave goodbye or blow her a kiss.

He
didn’t bother to look back, not once. He hadn’t said he’d call. She felt like
dropping to her knees and bawling like a baby. Turning, she headed out the
doors, back to the Jeep, back to her lonely, empty world.

“Lacey!”

She
whipped around at the sound of her name. “Coe?” She stared blankly at Danger’s
identical twin. Oh, my God! Thank God, Rafe hadn’t kissed her goodbye. She
forced a smile on her lips and hugged her brother-in-law. “What are you doing
here?”

Coe
laughed and patted her shoulder. “I see Danger’s been doing his homework.”

“What?”
Lacey blinked.

“It’s
okay, Lacey. You’re a married woman, honey, you’re allowed to sport a hickey or
two or three. Besides, it lets me know everything’s all right on the home
front.” He grinned. “From the looks of you, everything must be great at home.”

She
swallowed hard. “Yes, of course. Why wouldn’t they be?” If her brother-in-law
spotted the marks that fast, Danger would see them a whole hell of a lot
quicker. She couldn’t let her guard down once he got home. She’d have to dig up
some darker makeup.

Coe
laughed. “I just flew in from L.A. I spent the holiday with Mom’s parents. What
are you doing here?”

“Oh,
I had to bring Rafe to catch his flight.” She hoped she sounded as casual as
she tried to.

“Where’s
Danger?”

“Missoula.”

Coe
frowned. “What the hell is he doing there?”

Lacey
stepped away from the doorway to let departing travelers escape the crowd. “He
had to deliver a prisoner there. You need a lift home?”

“Yeah,
sure. I was going to rent a car, but I’ll gladly ride with you. What prisoner,
Lace? We haven’t had any prisoners in Rimrock since the facelift started over a
month ago.”

“I
don’t know. He said it was someone the feds wanted there before Monday’s trial
began.”

“That
would be Luke Peterson’s trial. Sweetheart, we transferred him to Missoula last
month.”

“Yeah,
that’s the name. Luke Peterson. No, he was being held right here in Havre.”

“No,
he wasn’t. I’m one of the deputies who took him to Missoula. I know when he was
transferred. You must have misunderstood.”

Lacey
nodded. “Yeah. I think I’ve been misunderstanding a lot of things lately. You
have everything, all your luggage?”

Coe
grinned, his usual charming self. “Sure do. I’m driving!” He snatched her keys
out of her hands.

Lacey
didn’t argue. The last thing she wanted to do was drive when she had so many
other things on her mind.

Chapter Twelve

The naked truth is always better than the best-dressed lie.

~
Ann Landers

Blackstone Ranch

December 26, Friday

7:00 p.m.

By
the time Danger returned home late that evening, Lacey was frantic. Not just
with worry because the highways were still slick and icy, but also because he
wasn’t answering his cell phone.

The
overwhelming sense of guilt she felt for sleeping with Rafe was making her
insane. What if something happened to Danger before she could confess her sins?
Beg his forgiveness?

Not
only had Rafe left obvious signs of his possession on her, but she knew the
guilt she felt showed on her face. Her betrayal made her feel ugly and unclean inside.
She’d never been a person who lied very well or hid the things she did.

Lacey
nibbled her thumb. How could she face her husband? How did she tell him what
she’d let happen? Would he want her to leave right away? Of course, he’d want
her to leave immediately. He already hated her. Her confession would just make
him hate her more.

Pacing
the length of the living room, she froze in front of the fireplace when the
flash of headlights through the front window warned her Danger was home, at
last. Her heart raced. She chewed her thumbnail to the quick. Would her face
give her away? Yes! Absolutely. A total wreck, she knew her hair was wild, her
eyes red from crying, and she simply couldn’t find the energy to do anything
about any of it.

Quickly,
she raced over to her purse and turned off her cell phone. Rafe had called at
least fifty times since he’d left. She’d ignored his calls. She didn’t want him
calling. There was no way she could talk to him, not right now.

Danger
entered the house and headed straight down the hall with his suitcase. Well,
she needn’t have worried about him reading guilt on her face, seeing the three
hickeys or anything else where she was concerned. He hadn’t bothered to even
glance her way or speak.

She
returned to pacing and nibbling her thumbnail and waited for him to join her.
He didn’t get in a hurry. When he did return, he stopped at the end of the
hall, flashed a look of impatience toward her, then frowned. “What the fuck is
wrong with you?”

Lacey
stilled. Danger never spoke to her like she mattered to him anymore. His voice
always carried a distant chill, harsh, as if he despised her. She didn’t
understand what she’d done that made him talk to her so mean.

I
slept with Rafe!

She wanted to scream the confession at him.

He
shifted his gaze away from her, as if he lacked interest enough to bother to
look her way for very long.

Instead,
he opted for a cold beer and plopped down on the sofa in front of the
television. “God, I’m tired.” He took a chug from the bottle and stared at the
picture on the screen.

Lacey
stood there, silently screaming words through her head
.

I slept with Rafe! I might be pregnant by
him!

The
confession hammered away at her conscience.

Tell him! Tell him!

She
opened her mouth. “Danger, I—”

“Do
you mind? I’m watching TV.” He picked up the remote and flicked through the
channels. Silent. Another swallow of beer. Click-click-click. Three more
channels. Click-click-click. He paused long enough to roll the cold bottle
across his forehead. “God, my head is killing me.”

“Are
you hungry?” she asked. She hoped not. Everything she’d cooked for Christmas
dinner had either been scraped down the garbage disposal or fed to the dogs.

Danger
snorted. “Hungry for
your
cooking?
Hell, no. I already ate.”

Another
gulp of beer. Click-click-click. Channel after channel popped up on the
television screen.

Look
at me! I slept with another man. I might be pregnant by him. Can’t you tell
I’ve cheated on you? Would you care?

The
words filled her head, but she didn’t say them. “I think I’m coming down with
the flu,” she said, choking back her confession.

“Stay
the fuck away from me,” he snapped, irritable. “I don’t need your germs.”

“Yeah,
I’ll make sure I do.” Tears stung the back of her eyelids. Nausea bubbled in
her stomach. Oh, God, she was going to be sick. She couldn’t live with this
guilt. She had to tell him. “Danger, I—”

“Not now,
Lacey.” He groaned and rose
from the sofa, clicked off the television and tossed down the remote. Still not
looking at her, he killed the bottle of beer and dropped it in a trashcan by
the fireplace. “I’m exhausted. I’m going to bed.”

He
started past her, but she halted him with her words. “Why did you really go to
Missoula?”

Danger
paused. His eyes narrowed. He settled his gaze on the hickeys for a brief
second. His top lip curled before a look of annoyance flashed across his dark
face, there and gone. “I told you. I took a prisoner there for trial.”

“What’s
his name?”

“Whose?”

“The
prisoner you escorted to Missoula. What’s his name?”

“I’m
not in the mood for games. I’m tired. My head feels like it’s going to explode.”

“Too
damn bad! Answer me. What’s his name?”

“Luke
Peterson.”

“Wrong
answer.”

He
lifted his head. “Ah. So, my secret is out. You caught me in a lie. I didn’t
take Luke to Missoula.”

“I
know that. What I don’t know is why you preferred to spend a day and a night
alone in a motel room in Missoula?”

His
gray eyes turned to steel. “You wanna do this now?”

“Yes.
I want to know why you preferred to spend Christmas away from me, spend a day
and a night alone in a motel room.”

Danger’s
lips twisted into an icy curve. His eyes hardened, dark as flint. “God, Lacey,
you are so stupid. Who the fuck said I was alone?”

Her
heart plummeted. “I see. You were with someone?”

“Yeah.
I was with someone.”

The
sarcasm in his voice made her want to wince. “Another woman?” She barely
managed to squeeze out the words.

Danger
threaded fingers through his dark hair and swore softly. “What? You’re so dense
you want me to paint a picture? Yes. Another woman. Did I fuck her? Yes. I
spent last night and most of today fucking her. Did I like it? You’re damn
right. It felt good to be inside her, to be inside a woman I can trust. Am I
going to fuck her again? Ohh, yes, every damn chance I get. Do I give a fuck if
you know about her or not? Not really. Do I care that you spent the time I was
away screwing Rafe? Not particularly.”

“I
don’t understand.”

“It’s
not that difficult.”

“Maybe
not for you, but I’m playing catch up here.”

“You
aren’t playing catch up. I’m the one playing catch up. You’ve been going away
for months at a time with men into the wilderness. Men I don’t know, part of a
team.
Whose fucking team? Not
mine!”

“What?”

“Yeah.
You haul ass out of here at every opportunity to go on your fucking
photo shoots.
I’m sick of it! But here
you are, preparing to leave again in a couple of months, and I notice the
number of men scheduled to go on this shoot to Alaska has increased to six. Are
you fucking every one of them?”

Lacey
stood there, too stunned to respond. He thought she’d been cheating on him?
Dear God, she might be guilty now, but she’d never been unfaithful before Rafe.
“How long have you believed I’ve been sleeping with other men?”

“Ever
since Jared told me he shared his tent with you, and he sure liked what you
have between your legs.”

“What?
I’ve never slept with Jared. I swear to
God, I’ve never—”

“Don’t
lie, Lacey. Don’t you fucking lie to me!” He grabbed her by the shoulders. His
fingers bit into her skin.

“I’m
not lying. I’ve never cheated on you.”

He
shook her. An ugly snarl tightened his lips. “I said, don’t lie to me! Hell, at
least be honest, you fucking whore.”

“Get
your hands off me.”

Danger
slowly released her and stepped back.

Lacey
rubbed the reddened areas on her arms. “Don’t you ever,
ever
call me a name like that again. I’ve never lied to you about
anything. Ever. I’ve loved you with all my heart.”

He
snorted. “Right. While you were ‘loving’ me with all your heart, you were
screwing the men on your little expeditions to God knows where.”

“I
told you—”

“Shut
the fuck up! I wouldn’t believe you no matter what you said. Your willingness
to sleep with Rafe is enough to convince me of your guilt. Besides, Jared
showed me the panties you were wearing that he stripped off you.”

“Jared
Davis showed you a pair of women’s panties and you took it for granted they
were mine? You never questioned the fact
he
might be lying, stirring up trouble? There were two other women on that shoot.”

“He
didn’t lie about anything.”

“He
lied
to you!”

“No,
he didn’t.”

“How
do you know?”

“Because
the panties he showed me were the ones I bought for you last Christmas, the
pair with your initials, L.B.”

“He
stole them out of my tent!”

Danger
snorted. “How do you explain he knew about your tattoo?”

“My
tattoo?”

“Yeah,
you know that perfect butterfly with the pretty red and blue wings on your
right hipbone? Only a man who’s been between your legs would know of its
existence. How do you explain him knowing about it?”

“I
don’t know. God, maybe he spied on me while I was bathing.”

He
sneered. “You might be a whore, but you aren’t that tempting to look at. Why
would he sneak a peek when you were giving it to him anytime he wanted?”

Lacey
gritted her teeth. “For the last time, I did not sleep with Jared Davis, and if
you call me a whore once more, I’ll deck you with something.”

“For
God’s sake, Lacey, I’m tired of your lies, just give me a damn divorce and get
the hell out of my life!”

Lacey
reeled. “Divorce?” She’d known it was coming, but the word still sent a shaft
of pain through her soul.

“I
want free of you as soon as possible.”

“You
slept with another woman to get even with me for sleeping with Jared Davis?”

“That’s
right. I got even plenty of times. Hell, once you even showed up unexpected at
the jail and Karen was in the bathroom. I’d just fucked her, and you didn’t
have a clue. As soon as you left, I screwed her again. It felt even better the
second time round.”

Lacey
swallowed hard and held up a shaky hand. “I’m happy for you, Danger. I am. I’m
glad you got even for all the wrongs you think I’ve done. But I wonder is it me
you were punishing or your mother for all the times she left your father for
other men?”

Inside,
Lacey wept. She couldn’t remember Danger ever being deliberately cruel or
crude.

“Don’t
act so self-righteous and innocent. I know Jared wasn’t the only man in the expeditions
you slept with.”

“You
do?”

“I
know about Marcus Ryan and Jack Miller. Jared told me how the three of them
shared you one night. Marcus confirmed what Jared told me.”

“Marcus
and Jared are buddies. He’d say whatever Jared wanted him to say, and Jack is
dead. He can’t confirm their lies, but he’d tell you the truth.”

“I
know the truth. For pity’s sake, you have nothing to complain about, Lacey. I
made sure you were taken care of before I left for Missoula. From the marks on
your throat, I’d say Rafe did a fair job of satisfying you. Or are you going to
stand there and tell me you didn’t sleep with him, either? He’s had the hots
for you for so long, I figured since you were putting out I’d do him a favor
and give him the night alone with you. I knew you’d grab the opportunity to
fuck him. I see I was right…looks like he nailed you good.”

“What?”
Lacey’s throat tightened. Her stomach dropped to her knees. Nausea curled its
way through her gut. She staggered back from him, reaching blindly for the wall
behind her to brace herself. “Why would you do such a thing? Why would you set me
up for such a fall?”

Danger
smiled, but his eyes looked as cold and deadly as the blade of a knife. “You
didn’t fall, I didn’t force you to do one damn thing you didn’t wanna do and
I’m betting Rafe didn’t force you. Did he?”

She
shook her head, too numb to reply. What a fool she was.

“I
gave you to him, Lacey. Hell, I hoped you’d get the fuck out of my life and
leave with him when he returned to Texas.”

Lacey
stared at him. Her body trembled. A numbing chill iced her mind. “You
gave
me to him? Did…h–he know?”

“Yeah,
he knew. I didn’t come right out and say,
Here,
take the cheating bitch off my hands
, but he got the message I wasn’t going
to get in his way or give a shit if he fucked you.”

“You
bastard!”
Lacey slapped him across
the face as hard as she could. His head snapped back. A trickle of blood seeped
from the corner of his mouth. “What gave you the right to
give
me to anyone? You aren’t God. I’m not a piece of property you
can pass around to another man! I’m your wife.”

“My
wife?
You haven’t been my wife for a
long, long time. At least not to me. Besides, you liked it, didn’t you? Liked
Rafe screwing you?” He wiped the blood away with his thumb. “Yeah, I see it in
your eyes…you liked it a lot. Was he as good as Jared in the sack?”

“When
did you stop loving me, Danger?”

“You
sure you wanna know that?”