To Love and Protect (20 page)

Clarissa couldn’t help it and burst out laughing.
 
“You sound like a young woman I have made acquaintances with this year.”

“You mean there are other women like me in London society.”

“Well, there is definitely one.
 
Perhaps she is slightly more
sociable
than you are at the moment, but she definitely has her own flair about her.
 
Why don’t you tell me about Liam?”

“His family is gentry in the village that my grandparents live near.
 
He and Justin and Jonathan were best friends growing up.”

“Jonathan?”

“Justin hasn’t told you about Jonathan?”

“No.”

“He was Justin’s twin, our brother.
 
He was killed in Italy in a battle almost three years ago.”

“I had no idea.
 
I’m so sorry.”

“I don’t know if Justin’s ever talked about it.
 
They were very close.”

“I can only imagine.”

“Tell me about Liam.”

“I have always loved Liam.
 
He loves me as well.”

“What makes you say that?”
 
Clarissa watched a deep blush sweep across Megan’s pale skin.

“We just know, Clarissa.”

“Megan, some men will do or say anything to get what they want from a woman,” she said thinking back to all the things that Franklin had said to her over the last few months.

“Liam isn’t like that.
 
He truly loves me.
 
In fact, he has told me he is going to speak to Da’ about marrying me.”

“Then why so secretive?”

“Jonathan and Liam fought before Jon went off to war.
 
I’m not sure what it was about.
 
Liam refuses to tell me, but I have a feeling it was something that I told him I had witnessed.
 
Whatever it was, I think Jon told Justin.
 
Ever since that time, Justin has treated Liam…differently.
 
They don’t act as if they are friends anymore,” Megan said sadly.

“What was Jonathan like?”

“Not like Justin at all.
 
Jonathan was always brooding.
 
He would be overcome by a darkness that resided in him at times.
 
He would go off for days at a time, and no one would know where he had been.
 
It was after one of those times that he and Liam fought.
 
Soon after, he left to join the military, and now Justin does everything possible to see that I am not alone with Liam, when he is around.”

“There must be an explanation,” Clarissa muttered.
 
Then she remembered something Maureen had said on their first night here.
 
“Your mother knows how you feel about Liam.”

“Yes.
 
I don’t think Justin has ever told them what went on.
 
Sometimes I wonder if Justin really knows the truth.
 
Please, don’t judge me with what I am about to say.
 
I loved my brother, but sometimes he frightened me.”

“The darkness.”

“Yes,” Megan’s eyes looked haunted, the happy young woman gone.

“You saw something.”

“I don’t want to burden you with our family’s troubles.”

“If I didn’t care, I wouldn’t ask.”

“I was out riding one day when I came upon a rise.
 
I paused a moment, I’m still not certain why, and when I looked down I saw Jon.
 
He shot a wild boar in the leg, and then took off chasing it.
 
When he caught up with it, he knocked it over, straddling it.
 
He stabbed the poor creature over and over, laughing wildly all the while.
 
I can still hear the final squeals and his laughter.
 
He did not kill it for food, Clarissa.
 
And I believe he wounded it intentionally so that he could have the pleasure of slaughtering it.”

“Dear Lord,” Clarissa whispered.

“After that, I never let myself be alone with him.
 
Liam is the only other person I ever told.
 
I think he must have tried to talk to Justin, but...”

“Yes.
 
I can see where he would not want to hear anything bad about his brother.”

“I am tired of keeping a dead man’s secret.
 
I am tired of his problems being taken out on the wrong people.
 
Do you think you might be able to get Justin to understand?”

“Megan, I think you misconstrue Justin and my relationship.
 
We are merely friends.”

“He does not look at you like a friend, and you do not look at him that way either.
 
You look at each other the way Liam and I look at each other.”

“I…”

“Please, Clarissa.
 
I do not want to have to choose, but I will if I must, and it will not be in my brother’s favor.”

“If the topic comes up, I will do what I can.”

“Thank you.”
 

“Tomorrow, we will work on your French and your painting.”
 

“Bien sûr. Jusqu'à demain, mademoiselle,” Megan spoke in flawless French.

“I have a feeling too many people have fallen for your antics, Megan, and not held you accountable.”

“Peut-être,” she replied coyly, stood and swished her skirts as she floated from the room, leaving Clarissa shaking her head.

***

The next morning Megan walked gracefully, but happily into the breakfast room.
 
She looked so much more a young woman than a hoyden.
 
Clarissa had her breakfast upstairs with her father, so only the Southerby family sat around the table.

“Megan, I believe you are actually gliding when you walk.
 
What has happened?”

“Clarissa,” she replied, unable to keep the smile from her face.

“I guess I don’t have to ask how it went yesterday?” Justin queried Megan.

“No.
 
Although, I think I drove her a bit mad, but I was only doing what she asked of me.”

“And what did she ask?”

“She wanted to know what I knew of society.
 
I think I impressed her.”

“How long did you talk before she stopped you?”

“Almost two hours.”

“My word.
 
She has more gumption than I do.
 
And she’s still cognizant?”

“Justin,” his mother admonished.

“Mamma,” he teased back.

“Justin, did you know her birthday was the end of November?”

“What?” her mother asked.
 

“She turned twenty.”

“And worried about her father’s welfare instead of being able to celebrate.
 
Poor thing.
 
You know, we should do something for her.”

“No,” Justin said softly.

“Why not?” his mother asked.

“I don’t think she is much in the mood for a party or anything like that, but I do have an idea.
 
Da’ may I borrow the coach?”

“Where are you taking her?”

“The loch, of course.”

“Of course,” his parents said unanimously with smiles on their faces.

“And you,” he pointed to Megan, “will do your lessons even though Clarissa will not be here, do you understand?”

“Justin, you do not have to treat me like a school girl any longer.
 
I promise I have made a change, and I do not intend on turning back.”

“I’ll believe that when it happens,” Justin said, tweaking a lock of her hair as he left the room.
 

***

By the time Justin arranged everything, the noon hour fast approached.
 
He looked out a window before going upstairs to find Clarissa.
 
There were clouds building, and a light snow dusted every surface, but no major storms looked to be in sight.
 
He made certain that they had enough blankets and anything else they might need.
 
Justin climbed the stairs and first knocked on Clarissa’s door.
 
Silence.
 
He peeked in on her father, not wanting to wake the man if he rested.
 
The duke slept soundly and looked better than he had only days ago, but he saw no sign of Clarissa.

After closing the door softly, so as to not wake the duke, Justin heard giggling coming from down the hall.
 
He passed several doors and heard the giggling grow louder as he approached Megan’s room.
 
Her door stood open and he could hear the women conversing in French and then break into more giggles.
 
One of them must have seen him, because all of a sudden he heard shushing sounds.

“Am I interrupting anything?” his deep voice filled the air.

“No,” Clarissa said, a smile teasing her lips.
 
Megan fought another bout of giggles.

“Good, I have a surprise for you.”

Clarissa looked at her pupil and saw that she looked expectantly at her.
 
When she looked up at Justin, he held a hand out for her to take.
 
“Me?” she asked, shock lacing her voice.

“Yes, you, silly,” Megan said with a grin.
 
“Go on.”

Clarissa placed her hand hesitantly in Justin’s.
 
Pleasure tingled in her fingers and raced up her arm.
 
She attempted to suppress a shiver that raced down her spine and outward.

“Chilled?” Justin queried, a look of concern in his eyes.

“Not at all,” she replied, berating herself for allowing her reaction to him to be physically noticeable.

“You two have fun,” Megan sing-songed as they left the room.

“What is this surprise?” Clarissa queried, curiosity getting the best of her.

“A certain little bird informed me of how remiss I had been during our journey here.”

“What are you talking about?” They paused to get heavy cloaks, mufflers, scarves, gloves and anything else to keep them warm.
 
She let him lead her out of the house and down the front steps.
 
A carriage awaited them with the Southerby crest on the side.
 
“I don’t know that I should leave Papa,” she hesitated on the bottom step.
 
She desperately wanted to go with him and forget her worries, even if for a few moments, but she felt she needed to stay and care for her father.
 

“Quit worrying.
 
Your father is well looked over and you need some peace and quiet.”

“But...”

“No buts.
 
You’re going, and you
will
enjoy yourself.
 
Do you understand?”

“Is that an order?”

“I’m sorry.
 
No, it is not an order.
 
It is a request.
 
Please come and enjoy the day before us.
 
I promise we will have fun.
 
The day is warm for the season and you will like what I have to show you.”

“You’ve convinced me,” she placed her hand in his once more and allowed him to help her into the carriage.
 
The coach was well-equipped and comfortable.
 
Clarissa found herself drifting off to the rhythm of the horses.
 
She felt the carriage shift and opened sleepy eyes to see Justin move across the coach to sit next to her.

“Here, lean on me,” he said softly, putting his arm around her and allowing her to rest against him, “otherwise you will hurt your neck.”
 
He saw the questioning look cross her eyes.
 
“Don’t argue with me.
 
You need your rest and what a perfect opportunity -- a quiet carriage ride.
 
Are you warm enough?”

“Yes,” she sighed, snuggling under the blanket, her feet heated by warmed bricks located under the seat.

She let him pull her to his side and place his arm around her shoulders.
 
She rested her head on his shoulder and before she knew it, sleep had claimed her.
 
Justin enjoyed feeling the warmth of the woman pressed against his side.
 
In fact, he probably enjoyed it a little too much.
 
She snuffled softly in her sleep.
 
He couldn’t hide the small smile that spread across his lips.
 
Justin gently pulled her closer and felt his lower body stiffen in response as her breasts flattened into his side.

He spent the remainder of the trip looking out the windows, enjoying being back in his homeland.
 
The closer they traveled to their destination, the more relaxed Justin became.
 
Even though a light dusting of snow lay on the ground, many of the trees still tenaciously clung to their golden and rust-colored leaves.
 
Unconsciously, he ran his fingers through the tendrils of her hair that had loosened from the tie that held the majority back.
 
He found the action soothing.
 
Before he even realized it, the time had slipped away, and they were rounding the curve that would provide her with her first glorious view of Loch Lomond.

He kissed her gently on her temple before whispering in her ear, “Clarissa, wake up.
 
I want to show you something.”
 
She mumbled in her sleep and a frown marred her brow.
 
“You’ll be upset that you missed it.”

She pushed away from him and yawned sleepily before stretching as far as she could within the confining space.
 
“What is it?” A mutinous look crossed her face.

“So, you don’t like to be wakened from a good sleep?”

“Not particularly.”

“Take a look out the window,” he nodded his head towards the window next to her.
 
She looked through the open curtains, and her breath caught in her throat.
 
Everything looked so beautiful.
 
Mountains lay before them, running into the edge of the lake and disappearing below its glassy surface.
 
Woods lay before them, their fall foliage not completely gone.