To Court a Cowgirl (13 page)

Great.

He went into the living room, where his dad was stretched out in his chair. The Dobes barely raised their eyelids. “What's the deal, Dad?”

“What do you mean?”

“You gave the doctor a hard time?”

“I didn't like his attitude.”

“Find someone else.”

“It might have been different if you'd come along instead of doing that ridiculous bullshit you're spending your days doing. It's just to get out away from me, isn't it?”

“Why would anyone want to get away from you, Dad?”

Max narrowed his eyes at his traitorous son. “Don't get all smart-ass with me. You might have been a big-shot pro, but now you're just a guy without a job.”

His dad was angry and Jason was getting there faster by the second. But instead of saying, “Speaking of bullshit, Dad, I didn't come home to take yours,” he said, “I think you should see someone about your anger before you have another attack.”

The way Max's eyes bulged, Jason was afraid that he'd tipped over then and there. “You mean a shrink?”

“Whatever you want to call it. A counselor, therapist, whatever.”

Max's expression went cold. “I'm not angry over anything that I shouldn't be angry over. The doctor is taking away the things I enjoy in life, and I have a right to be angry.”

“Replace them. Replace the things you love with new things.”

“That's what I told him,” Kate said from the doorway.

“I can't believe you guys are double-teaming me. Get out. Both of you.” Max waved a hand and Kate instantly turned and walked back into the kitchen.

“See?” she said once Jason had joined her there and the swinging door had gone shut.

“Let's just take a minute. Regroup.”

“I'm doing what he said.” Kate grabbed her sweater. “You should, too.”

“What if—”

“He knows how to operate a cell phone,” she said impatiently. “It's right there next to his chair.”

“Good point.”

Jason's phone rang, stopping Kate at the door. She looked back over her shoulder as Jason answered.

“Jason, it's Allie... I want to apologize.”

Jason let out a breath and directed his gaze downward. “Accepted.” The word dropped from his lips like a stone.

He expected her to say goodbye and hang up now that her duty had been done, but instead she said, “Are you all right?”

“Yeah. I'm fine.”

“I'd like to talk sometime, if we could.” She paused for a split second before adding softly, “Explain some things.”

“Sounds good. Look, I'll, uh, see you tomorrow. Thanks.” He hung up before she could say anything else. Now he'd be the one apologizing tomorrow. He met his sister's gaze.

“I just need some time away,” she said.

“I'll stay.”

“Thank you. I'll be back tomorrow, after I get a chance to cool off,” she muttered before opening the door and disappearing into the garage. A few seconds later Jason heard her small car start.

Max came into the kitchen then and stopped just inside the door. “I thought you were gone.”

“Just Kate. She's the one who needed a break.”

“You need to leave, too.”

“Careful what you wish for, Dad.”

“I'm not kidding. Get out of my house.”

“Shall I take my stuff?” Jason asked grimly.

“Just go. Give me some space. After all, I do know how to use a cell phone.”

He'd been listening. Fine. “Then you'd better damned well use the thing if you need it,” Jason said, feeling like he had a rock in his stomach. “I'll be back in a couple of hours. That'll give you time to decide if you want me to move out or not.”

But Jason didn't drive away. Instead he sat in his truck, which was parked next to his Dad's Jeep, and stared through the windshield at the garage doors, wondering if he should go to Kate's house or let her have the time to herself she needed. If they got together, it'd become a bitch-fest about Max, and neither of them needed that. The curtains were closed, but when Jason glanced over at the house, he could see the light from the television change as his father flipped through channels.

He needed to go somewhere—at least until Max went to sleep. Allie had said she wanted to talk. Well, no time like the present. He hit Redial on his phone.

“Are you busy?”

“No.” There was an edge of caution in her voice, but when wasn't there?

“Could I come over? I...just got kicked out of my house and I'm waiting for my dad to cool off.” No sense pretending things were different than they were. If Max told Jimmy, then the world would know by the end of the day tomorrow.

“Uh, sure. Come on over.”

Jason set down the phone and started his truck. Like Kate had said, Max had a cell and he knew how to use it. If he didn't feel like calling his kids, he could call his brother.

Less than fifteen minutes later he pulled into the drive of the Lightning Creek and Allie came outside to meet him, pulling on her denim jacket as she walked. He got out of the truck and met her at the gate.

“You got kicked out of your house?”

“Yeah...can you believe it? I feel like I'm sixteen.”

“What are you going to do?”

“Wait until he falls asleep, then go back home.”

“Really?”

“If he kicks me out again tomorrow, I'll figure something out, but I don't think he's going to. He's overwhelmed by the fact that he can't control every facet of life—mine, Kate's, his—and is lashing out.”

Allie shifted uncomfortably, perhaps seeing a parallel between her behavior and his father's. “He controlled your life?”

“Not since high school, but now that I'm back, I think he's trying to make up for lost time. It irritates him when I don't fall in with his thinking.”

“Going to work for your uncle.”

“And ignoring it when he doesn't follow doctor's orders.”

“How's your sister holding up?”

“Kate has pretty much hit the end of her rope. It's on me now.”

“If you need a place to stay, you know you can bunk here.”

He smiled a little. “Is that an honest invitation?”

She raised her chin. “Yes. And I'm sorry about the way I acted earlier.”

“I already accepted your apology.”

“I don't think so,” she said softly. “Not that I blame you.” She held his gaze, as if daring him to challenge her words.

He couldn't, because she was correct. He hadn't accepted her apology so much as he'd mouthed the expected response and then stewed—not about what she'd said, but about the way she treated him like the enemy. He glanced down at the cracked sidewalk, and when he looked up again, he caught the uncertainty in Allie's expression.

“Okay. Maybe I didn't.”

“And you don't have to. I have no excuse.” She put a hand on the picket gate between them, reminding him that during the one kiss they'd shared, they'd had a fence between them. “But I can explain...if you care to listen.”

He did. “Let's go for a drive.”

“Yes,” Allie said quietly. “I'd like that.”

* * *

O
F
ALL
HER
SISTERS
, Allie had the least difficulty saying what needed to be said—although Mel was a close second—but now, as she sat a few feet away from Jason and had things to say, words failed her.

Jason didn't seem to care. At the end of the driveway, instead of turning left toward town, he turned right toward the Staley house and then a mile later, he turned onto a seldom-used track that led to the trestle road. He seemed to know this part of the country—her part of the country—which surprised her. He pulled to a stop where the track intersected the road leading to the bridge and put the truck into Park, letting it idle.

Time to talk.

So where did she start? All of the clever openings she'd practiced as they drove through the darkness stalled on her lips.

Finally she took a deep breath. “After my marriage broke up, I had a hard time getting my footing again.” Total truth. Still the truth in many ways.

“I can imagine.” He sounded like he knew what she was talking about, which again made her wonder about his former relationships.

“My world changed radically in a short period of time, but it had also been changing slowly over a long period of time. I'd stubbornly refused to acknowledge that, so it seemed as if everything hit me at once.” She spoke without looking at him. “I've been angry and afraid and...” Her mouth tightened as she glanced his way. “Did I mention that I was angry?”

“And afraid?” His tone was cool, but not cold.

“Yes.” She looked at the windshield again. “But mostly angry. At Kyle. At myself. At the world.” Her hands twisted in her lap and she made a conscious effort to stop moving. “As for being afraid...anger is so much easier.”

“What are you afraid of, Allie?”

“Failure.” One corner of her mouth tightened. “More specifically, I'm afraid of not being secure. Money will make me secure, however, the job I trained for—”

“You don't love it.”

She shook her head. “No. I do not.”

“And you don't see yourself as having the time and money to train for something new.”

“Just thinking about it makes me feel like my stomach is twisting into a pretzel. And the ranch fell apart while Kyle and I were there. Dani and Jolie worked hard to build it back up again, and even though I probably don't have the time to ruin it again, I did lose a barn.”

“Mother Nature had a hand in that.”

Allie pressed her palm to her forehead. “I need the ranch to do well until my sisters come back at the end of the year and I need to get over the fact that my job is just a job. A lot of people work at jobs that are just jobs.”

She cast him a sideways look. “I'm sorry that you've been the object of my frustration on more than one occasion. I've been jealous of the fact that you had a job you enjoyed and that you have the security of money.”

Silence stretched between them for a couple of long seconds.
And this is where you say you understand
. Because, whether she liked it or not, it was important to her that he understand.

“And,” he finally said, “I did get that scholarship.”

Allie gave a small snort. “Which you didn't need.”

He made a dismissive gesture. “You would have wasted it training for a field you don't enjoy.”

A joke. At her expense, and she was good with that. “Are you using
your
degree?”

“I can't remember my degree.”

This time she laughed. “Do you need it? Your degree?”

“I need something,” he said on a dark note. He shifted in his seat and put the truck in gear. The truck rolled forward and Jason turned onto the trestle road. A couple miles later, he turned again onto a narrow dirt road that seemed remarkably well traveled, and drove another half mile before pulling to a stop in a large clearing that was nearly devoid of vegetation. He turned off the engine and got out of the truck. After a second's hesitation, Allie followed looking around at the stone fire rings and the old metal oil drums used as trash cans.

“What is this place?”

He shot her an incredulous look. “You're kidding, right?”

“I'm not.”

“Kyle never took you here in high school?”

“Kyle and I didn't start dating until after I went to college. But...I think I get it.” This was a party spot. A make-out spot.

“In high school, this was the second-best place on earth—the best being the gridiron, of course.” He walked toward the rickety wooden bridge crossing the creek.

“I'll have to take your word on both of those,” Allie said, catching up to him. She started across the bridge ahead of him. On the other side of the creek, the grass was long and green and springy beneath Allie's feet as she stepped off the bridge.

“I didn't get the job.”

The words came out of nowhere. Allie stopped and turned back toward Jason, who stood at the edge of the bridge.

He wouldn't be assistant to the assistant? That had to sting.

“I'm sorry.”

“Yeah.” He let out a long breath. “Not everything in my life works out.”

“I never thought that.” Allie had automatically defended herself, although she was guilty of thinking his life was a lot better than hers in many ways. Ways that mattered to her.

“I thought I'd have a decent shot at it, because of, well...”

“Who you are?”

“I worked hard to be who I am. I—” he gave a small shrug “—expected it to continue to pay off. My former coach, who's something of a legend, put in a good word for me. It wasn't enough.”

Ouch. They took a few silent steps, walking side by side, and then she said, “So what now?”

“I send out more résumés. Call other people I know to see if they have any leads.”

“I bet you'll find something,” Allie said as she moved past him. He took hold of her arm, stopping her progress, and her lips parted as she looked up at him.

“Why didn't you date in high school, Allie?”

He barely had hold of her, but she had no intention of pulling away. This was a night of truths for her and she liked the contact. Liked it a lot, but wouldn't let it get to the point that she had to make any big decisions about complicating her life any further.

“I was still recovering from my dad passing away and the ranch was in trouble, so I preferred to hang with my mom and help her as much as I could.”

“Were you afraid of losing her, too?”

“I think I was.”

Jason let go of her and they fell into step again, following the creek. “My mom left right before we moved here. Dad had the money and the lawyers, so he got custody of Kate and me.”