Timeless (6 page)

We went out to the deck, where Ben had
arranged a bouquet of another two dozen pink roses on a candlelit
table set up for two. He reached to pull the chair out for me and
then went back inside.

As I waited for him to return, I couldn’t
believe my eyes. The entire deck was strewn with lights, and as
dusk turned to evening, the candles gave off a romantic glow. So
that was the “fishing” he’d done this afternoon. I felt guilty at
ever doubting him this morning with Angela.

Ben returned with two plates, which he set in
front of us.

“What, no wine?” I teased.

“Well, actually, I think Mom put some in the
fridge earlier today before they left,” he said.

“I was just kidding. Iced tea is fine,” I
said, surprised that he’d taken me seriously.

I looked around and smiled, still amazed that
he had taken all this trouble for me.

“Ben, this is wonderful. I can’t believe how
much time it must have taken for you to set this up. I mean, don’t
think I’m not grateful, because I am, but what’s the special
occasion? Our anniversary isn’t for another six months,” I
said.

He hesitated for a moment, and I thought, no,
he’s not popping the question. We were, after all, only
sixteen.

“I know, but I thought that this week might
be difficult for you,” he answered quietly.

And suddenly I remembered. This time last
year I was in a hospital room with Mom. The anniversary of her
death was almost here. I couldn’t believe that I’d almost forgotten
it. I really was out of it, and I felt even guiltier than I had
before. Granted, I’d had a near-death experience. But could one
nightmare really disorient me that much?

Ben must have seen the conflicting emotions
working on my face.

“I’m sorry, Emily…I just thought you might
not want to be alone. I wanted you to know I’ll always be there for
you,” he said quietly, reaching for my hand.

“No, Ben, you’re totally right,” I said,
wanting to cry, not just because I missed Mom so much but also
because I was happy to have Ben. I was the luckiest person in the
world, I thought, thinking of how much both of these people had
loved me.

“What would I do without you?” I asked,
coming over to kiss him.

“That’s the idea,” he said, laughing to
lighten the moment as he threaded his fingers through mine.

What would I do without him? He’d been there
nearly all my life, a firm shoulder to cry on, a confidant, maybe
even a husband one day.

Ben and I had been around each other long
enough for our silences to be comfortable, not awkward, so we ate
our meal quietly, the only sounds coming from a small fountain in
his parents’ backyard.

When we’d finished eating, we went back to
the living room to watch a movie I’d wanted to see for awhile:
Tristan and Isolde. I felt a strange sensation come over me as we
watched the story unfold about two medieval lovers tragically kept
apart. My heart began to race, and I could feel myself beginning to
hyperventilate. Flashes of memories—no, not memories, that couldn’t
be, it had to be visions—appeared before my eyes. His face mixed
with hers, the dark of their eyes comingling, the one soft and
tender, the other fierce with hatred. An older man I had never seen
yet knew as well as myself seemed to stand over me, horrified by
his own act of betrayal. I tried to tell myself it was the movie,
but the faces didn’t match the actors. I knew them.

Ben looked in my direction and saw me shaking
uncontrollably. I could see him call out my name, but a loud rush
roared in my ears and prevented me from hearing or answering his
questions. The faces before me collided, then merged, and
everything became black.

I awoke sometime later on the couch, Ben’s
concerned face above me.

“Emily?”

“Ben,” I said, relieved to see a face I could
put a name to.

He had a washcloth and was wiping my face. He
slowed helped me to sit up. I had a fierce headache.

“What happened?” I asked, holding my head in
my hands.

“I think you passed out. Emily, I’m
sorry.”

“Sorry? For what? We were having a great
evening until I fainted.”

“It was too much for you all in one day, you
know, with this morning and all,” he said. I could tell that he
hadn’t wanted to bring it up again, probably because he knew it
would embarrass me. I could feel my face flushing.

“I suppose so, yes,” I said slowly, not
actually believing that it had anything to do with that. “How long
was I out?”

“Maybe fifteen seconds? I was afraid you
might slip off the couch, so I put your feet up, called 911, and
got a washcloth.”

“So the paramedics are coming?”

He looked sheepishly at me and shrugged.

“You just passed out for no reason, Em. I was
scared.”

“It’s okay,” I assured him. “I would’ve done
the same.”

We heard the sirens, and Ben went to answer
the door and assure them that everything was alright. What else
would happen to me all in one day?

The paramedics talked to me for some time and
tried to urge me to see someone—sixteen-year-olds don’t normally
just faint dead away for no reason—but Ben explained what had
happened to me that morning. Somewhat satisfied, they left a few
minutes later.

Ben sat down beside me on the couch and gave
me hug.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” I said,
laying my head on his shoulder.

“Maybe it’s just the stress of the last
year,” Ben said quietly.

I nodded, somehow knowing it didn’t have
anything to do with Mom. As much as I missed her, this didn’t seem
anything like grief. I knew what that felt like. This was an
overwhelming fear of death strangely mixed with desire for some
unknown knight. Maybe Ben was right, maybe it was the stress that
had addled my brain.

We left a short time later and had a quiet
trip back, each with our own thoughts about what had happened. When
we pulled into the drive, I could see that Aunt Jo was in the
living room about to watch the eleven o’clock news.

Ben got out and walked me to the door, but
before I turned the knob, he stopped me.“Emily, I wanted to give
this to you earlier, but it didn’t seem right with everything that
happened,” he began, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a
small velvet bag, the kind that looked like it was from an
expensive jewelry store.

My heart almost literally stopped. He placed
the bag in my hands and then kissed me on the cheek, turning to
go.

“Aren’t you going to wait for me to open it?”
I asked him, confused. Ben usually came in to say goodnight to Aunt
Jo if she hadn’t already gone to bed.

“No, open it after I’m gone. I’ll call you
tomorrow,” he said, smiling. He bent down, kissed me again, and was
gone.

I stood watching Ben as he drove away,
intrigued by the mystery gift and anxious to open it.

Opening the front door instead, I was
immediately greeted by the Duchess, who waited for me. What’s with
you? I thought, wondering why she’d taken so much interest in me
lately—ever since the dream, I remembered, quickly putting that
thought out of my mind. I didn’t want to faint again at the front
door, have to face the paramedics all over again that night, or
worry Aunt Jo.

The Duchess purred a greeting, and I rubbed
her head. Curiously protective of me in the last few days, she
followed me around the house and stayed in my room while I did
homework or fell asleep.

I called out a “hello” to Aunt Jo and took
the stairs two at a time. I couldn’t wait to open Ben’s gift, glad
for an exciting distraction.

I plopped down on the bed and opened the bag,
which revealed an emerald and twenty-four carat gold ring set in a
Celtic knot. On the inside, there was an inscription that read
Timeless. It was the most beautiful and unusual ring I’d ever seen,
and I wondered where Ben got it.

I knew, without a doubt, why Ben had not
wanted to be with me when I opened it. He didn’t trust himself not
to kiss me, really kiss me, and he wanted to respect the memory of
my mother tonight while also letting me know he’d always be
there.

Aunt Jo knocked on the door and poked her
head in.

“How was it?” she asked, her long hair combed
out with two purple ribbons tying back the sides. Aunt Jo always
looked like a young girl in the evenings. She had waited for me
before going to bed. I wondered if she already knew about my
ring.

I had tears in my eyes, and she looked
concerned, coming in and sitting beside me on the bed.

“Emily,” she began, “what is it?”

“No, it’s fine. Really,” I said through
sniffles.

“Everything doesn’t look fine,” she
replied.

“It’s Ben,” I finally said, more than a
little teary-eyed but not wanting to go into the stranger details
of the day or night.

“What about him?” Aunt Jo asked. And then she
saw the ring.

“Now young lady, you’re too young to be
getting engaged. I hope that’s not what this is about,” she began
sternly. So she didn’t already know, I thought. It must have been a
surprise from everyone because Annie couldn’t keep a secret, and
Zack told everything to Annie, who would’ve at least dropped a hint
to me.

I laughed through the tears.

“No,” I assured her, “he just gave me a
present to let me know how much he still loves me. You know, with
everything that’s happened in the last year,” I finished.

Aunt Jo nodded her head. She understood, and
neither of us wished to bring up the painful memories of the past
year. Aunt Jo missed Mom too, I knew.

“Why don’t you try and get some sleep. It’s
been a big day,” she said, giving me a hug.

I sniffed, gave her a hug, and lay down on
the bed, not bothering to change. I didn’t want the night to end
even though I was tired. I drifted off sometime later and dreamed
of a strong, handsome face. It wasn’t Ben’s.

Chapter Three

"The Quest"

And what you do not know is the only thing
you know…

T. S. Eliot, “East Coker”

Mr. Dean’s history class was not the most
riveting place to be, but after my strange dream and frightening
encounters, I became more interested in the Middle Ages and started
paying more attention in class, to the amusement of Annie and Ben,
both of whom had fifth period with me.

“And so, as you can see, the Black Death
wiped out as many as a third of England’s population during the
fourteenth century,” Mr. Dean finished, looking excitedly around.
His fervor diminished by the bored or sleeping faces in front of
him until he saw me. His face lit up.

“Ms. St. Clair,” he said.

I hated being called on in class.

“Yes?” I said, tentatively, feeling the blush
creep up my neck.

“I’d like us to review what we covered last
week for our upcoming test on the thirteenth century. Can you tell
me which king signed the Magna Carta?” he asked.

I thought for a few minutes and then
knew.

“King John,” I answered.

“Excellent. Now, for extra credit—can you
tell me what year?”

Automatically, I answered, “1215.”

“Impressive. Place?”

“Runnymede, England.”

Annie and Ben both turned to look at me, and
even I was surprised. I hadn’t bothered to read the assignment last
week, and I didn’t usually pay that much attention in class. Annie
and I typically passed notes, while Ben and Zack popped us with
rubber bands.

“It seems that Ms. St. Clair has been doing
her homework,” he said. “Good job, Emily.”

Mike, who sat in front of me, turned and
laughed, while his neighbor, Jamie rolled her eyes, muttering
“teacher’s pet” in a loud whisper.

By this time, my cheeks were on fire.

I couldn’t understand how I knew these
things. It was as though I remembered them, not from a textbook but
from memory.

The bell rang, and Mr. Dean was coming to my
row. This was only getting better.

“Yes, sir?” I asked, hoping he didn’t want to
quiz me further.

“Nice work today, Emily. I didn’t know you
had such an interest in history,” he said, smiling.

“I don’t,” I said hastily until I saw his
disappointed face.

“I mean, I don’t usually,” I backtracked.
“But I’m really interested in medieval England.”

I didn’t know where that came from, but I
knew all of a sudden that it was entirely true. I was interested in
history.

“You know, I’m in charge of the trip to
Europe in the spring,” he began. “You should really consider going.
The school is having several fundraisers to pay for it. I’m also
getting us a discounted rate for airfare and the hotels from a
travel agent I know. We’re hoping to raise enough to cover the cost
of visiting several countries, including England.”

“Yeah, that sounds great. Where do I sign
up?” I asked.

“With me. I’ll put your name down. I can get
you more detailed information and a permission slip to take to your
Aunt.”

“Okay, thanks,” I said, glad now I’d spoken
up in class. The urge to find the place in my dream was still
strong. I’d had a few vague, similar dreams to the first one,
though none of them had left me as paralyzed with fear as that
first nightmare or my two strange experiences, one of which almost
left me dead, had. I didn’t see crazy faces in the water or the
bathroom mirror—that is, if you didn’t count mine, I thought,
grinning just a little to myself. I was glad I could find it even
somewhat funny.

Ben was waiting for me outside by the
lockers.

“So you’re really going to Europe?” he
asked.

“Yeah, it looks like I am…Why don’t you come
too?” I asked, wanting to make amends for the last time we’d talked
about it. Since then, we hadn’t discussed the trip. Though I had
hesitated at first, I couldn’t really imagine taking it without
him. I still wasn’t entirely convinced that all of this wasn’t some
figment of my vivid imagination, the product of some film I’d seen
long ago that must have made a huge impression in my mind.